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“Blitzø!”
Blitzø woke with a start, rolling off the beanbag almost immediately before stumbling over to the couch where his very distressed bird was sitting up, panting heavily and eyes darting all around the room.
Stolas had nightmares semi-regularly, and at this point Blitzø was so used to being woken up by the owl that it barely even phased him anymore. He would hear the heavy breathing, or the startled yell, or in this case his name being called, and he was up in an instant to be by his side. Stolas had told him many times that he didn’t need to do this, that if Blitzø just let him be he would calm himself down and go back to sleep, but there was no fucking way that was gonna happen.
Sometimes he wondered if the nightmares were a new thing since the trial, or if Stolas had always suffered with them. He’d certainly never had any the nights he had slept over at the palace, but those nights had been few and far between. Stolas hadn’t seemed surprised by them either, but instead was mostly embarrassed and would apologize profusely to Blitzø for them.
Blitzø hated how much the owl apologized for things that no one should have to apologize for, and he also hated that he apparently thought Blitzø was the kind of demon that would get mad at him for something like having a fucking nightmare.
Some nights Stolas would shoo him away, call himself silly or foolish, and curl up into a ball on the couch. Other nights, when he was far more disturbed by whatever plagued his mind when he slept, he would be more receptive to Blitzø’s care and might even ask him to lay with him the rest of the night. Selfishly, Blitzø kinda liked those nights.
Tonight seemed to be one of those bad nights, if he had to guess, based on the way Stolas’ breath heaved in his chest and his eyes wouldn’t focus on any one thing in the room. As Blitzø reached for his hand Stolas startled and widened and narrowed his eyes a few times before looking puzzled.
It took Blitzø a moment to realize that Stolas was probably trying to turn him to stone.
“Stols, it’s just me," he said softly, taking a firm grasp of Stolas’ hand despite the way he tried to flinch away. “It’s Blitzø. You’re safe, Stolas.”
It took a while longer for a flicker of realization to spark in Stolas’ eyes, and then his breathing began to slow, and then his shoulders slumped and his mouth curved down into a tight frown.
“I’m sorry," he said, staring down at where Blitzø’s hand was still holding firmly to his own.
His voice sounded so tiny and far away. Blitzø had come to expect him to be this way after his nightmares, but he didn’t think he’d ever get used to seeing the owl look and sound so powerless.
“Nothing to apologize for, birdie.” Blitzø squeezed Stolas’ hand gently and bent down so he could meet his gaze and smiled up at him. “Okay?”
Stolas stared at him for a few seconds, then looked away. Blitzø tried his best not to feel disappointed.
“Do you need anything?” he asked, giving his hand one more squeeze before he slowly pulled it away from the owl.
Stolas didn’t say anything and didn’t look at him, and after waiting a few seconds he turned around and started to head back to his bean bag chair. He was about halfway back when a soft whine stopped him dead in his tracks, and he whipped back around to see Stolas staring at him, mouth quivering.
He was back at his side in an instant. When he felt Stolas curling his fingers around his hand and weakly pulling it towards him, he hopped up onto the couch and settled on the owl's lap. Stolas grabbed his other hand, pulling both of them up to his chest and holding them there tightly.
“I wasn’t fast enough,” Stolas croaked out, hands trembling.
“You weren’t fast enough for what?” he asked, pressing his and Stolas’ hands up against the owl’s chest in an attempt to stop them from shaking.
Stolas swallowed thickly. “I couldn’t get there in time.”
Stolas never wanted to talk about his nightmares, and it took him a while to understand what the owl meant, but then it clicked.
“But you did, Stols,” Blitzø said quietly, pulling his hands out of Stolas’ grasp so he could move them up to cup his cheeks. “You were fast enough, and I’m still here, and you’re still here.”
Stolas was still shaking and his eyes were darting all over Blitzø's body like he didn't believe it. For just a moment he let go of his cheeks and Stolas cried out, but Blitzø quickly laid down and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into a tight hug.
"I'm right here, birdie," he muttered. “You saved me. See?”
Stolas started crying and hiccuping loudly, his whole body shaking as he clung tightly to Blitzø. Good thing Loona was out tonight, although she wouldn't have been mad at him for it.
Blitzø just held him and let him cry, but Stolas' breathing only got more erratic and hiccupy, so he decided to push himself back up and pull the owl along with him. It was a bit of a struggle, but he was able to reposition them so Blitzø was sitting up near the end of the couch, holding onto Stolas as he laid his body against him and wept. He rubbed circles into his back with one hand and kissed the top of his head without thinking much about it.
All of a sudden Stolas was staring at him with an intense focus, and then he shot forward and kissed him.
Blitzø froze, totally caught off guard. They hadn't kissed or been any kind of intimate since Sinsmas. He had been trying to be careful because Stolas was going through it, and he really didn't wanna fuck shit up for him… or for them, if there was ever gonna be a them.
There would be, he kept telling himself.
Stolas was pulling away just as quickly as he'd joined their mouths together when he realized Blitzø wasn't reciprocating. He was already opening his beak, apologies spilling out for being too forward.
Blitzø didn’t want to hear another fucking apology from Stolas ever, honestly. Especially not about this.
Without giving himself any time to second guess the decision, he pulled the owl towards him again and pressed their mouths together.
He intended for it to be a soft, romantic kind of kiss, because that was the kind of shit Stolas liked and deserved. That proved to be pretty much impossible, though, because Stolas’ hands were moving all over his body in a near frenzy as if he needed to feel every inch of him. Not only that, he was gasping and moaning and sounding so fucking needy, and before he knew what he was doing he was slipping his tongue into the owl's mouth. The moan Stolas let out in response sent shockwaves through his body that went directly to his dick. He pulled back from him, panting.
"Stols…" Blitzø muttered, reaching up to cup the owl's cheek in his hand.
They shouldn't be doing this, as bad as he wanted to. Stolas stared at him, breath still heaving in his chest, eyes laser focused on him.
"I almost lost you," Stolas whispered before pressing himself up against him and peppering kisses all over his body.
This time he was kissing all up his neck, under his jaw, across his cheek, and then back down his neck to do it all over again. His kisses were sloppy and frantic and hot as fuck, and Blitzø couldn't help but moan and tangle his claws up in the owl's head feathers as he shuddered.
It felt really fucking good, and he didn’t want it to stop, but he couldn’t help the nagging feeling that he kinda sorta might be taking advantage of Stolas right now. The owl was clearly still freaked out from seeing Blitzø get his head chopped off or whatever, clearly exhausted, and not in his right mind.
"But you didn't, Stolas, I'm right–"
He was cut off by Stolas pulling him in and kissing him again. He slid his tongue along Blitzø's teeth until he gasped and then slipped it inside his mouth. This time, Blitzø let himself sink into the kiss, gently tugging on Stolas’ feathers and feeling his moans reverberate through his body. He felt delirious, so over tired from many sleepless nights, and he didn't feel like thinking anymore.
Now Stolas was grinding himself up against him, and Blitzø would be lying if he said he hadn't missed the way this felt. They hadn't been close like this in fucking forever, and Blitzø had been fantasizing about this moment more often than he'd ever care to admit, but this wasn't exactly the way he'd envisioned their first time after everything that went down would go.
When both he and Stolas' shirts lifted slightly, and he felt the owl's feathers against his stomach, he knew that he was getting dangerously close to doing something stupid. He tugged on Stolas' head feathers and pulled their mouths apart.
“Stolas, maybe we…” He began shakily, but couldn’t finish the statement because an involuntary moan left his body when Stolas dove down and started sliding his tongue from his collarbone all the way up his neck.
“Please,” Stolas breathed into his ear, just as he raised himself a little higher on the couch and started rubbing his pussy right against Blitzø's dick. "Let me."
Blitzø could feel the dampness through the fabric of his boxers and the tiny cloth shorts Stolas was wearing. A shudder ran through his body and he couldn't do anything but stare up at the owl, who was sitting up in his lap now.
He was so fucked. He was an asshole and a dumbass and a piece of shit who had Hell's sexiest owl looking at him like he was some kind of fucking treasure.
Stolas dipped down and captured his mouth in another kiss, and Blitzø melted into it. His tail wrapped around the bird’s thigh and squeezed, the spade brushing against the edge of Stolas’ shorts. He could feel Stolas’ feathers fluffing out and he exhaled a triumphant little huff of breath. Still fuckin' got it.
One of Stolas' hands was traveling down his body, gliding over the edge of his boxers and landing on his now extremely hard dick. Blitzø’s breath hitched, back arching as Stolas thumbed the head through the fabric. He moved his hand to do something he wasn't sure of, maybe he was going to stop Stolas… it didn't matter, because Stolas just grabbed his hand and pinned it against the couch. With his other hand, he wrapped his fingers around Blitzø's dick through the fabric of his boxers, and gave it a soft squeeze.
“Fuck, Stols,” Blitzø whined, the spade of his tail tapping against the owl’s inner thigh as he slid his hands around his waist. He gripped his sides firmly, claws digging into his feathers, and Stolas gasped.
"I–I need to… to…" Stolas mumbled as he scrabbled for the bottom of Blitzø's t-shirt and then began tugging it up. Blitzø let go of him and let the owl pull it off over his head before replacing his hands on his feathery waist. Stolas' eyes raked over his torso as Blitzø stared back up at him.
He wanted Stolas to take his shirt off too. It was already way too big for him, hanging loosely off one shoulder, exposing most of his chest and sometimes even his stomach when he bent too far forward. Stolas had been weirdly shy about being naked around him, too. He wasn't sure what that was about.
He fiddled with the hem of Stolas' shirt, but he didn't get the hint, or maybe he didn't want to take it off. Instead, he lifted his hips off of him just a little bit and reached down to pull at the waistband of Blitzø's boxers, freeing his dick. He sat back down on Blitzø's lap and grabbed it, pressing the length of it up against his stomach as he stared down at it.
It slipped just under the bottom of Stolas' shirt and rubbed against the soft feathers of his stomach. His dick twitched and Blitzø used the last two brain cells in his stupid head to form some words.
"S–Stolas, I… we shouldn't–"
"I need to feel you," Stolas breathed out, rubbing his thumb against the head and spreading a bead of pre all around it.
He gently rolled his hips forward, and fuck it, Blitzø could feel how fucking wet he was. The fabric of those stupid little red shorts, the ones he bought for Stolas because they kind of reminded him of that romper he always used to wear, was clinging so tight to his pussy he could feel his fucking lips through it.
"Stolas…" he protested weakly one last time as his own hands drifted lower, his fingers sliding beneath the waistband of those little shorts.
Stolas let out a shuddering moan and lifted himself again up off of Blitzø's lap. He reached a hand between his legs, grabbed the crotch of his shorts, and roughly yanked them to the side before lowering himself.
The sounds Stolas made as he slowly slid himself down onto Blitzø's dick were some of the hottest sounds he'd ever heard in his fucking life, and that combined with how fucking tight and wet and warm the owl was made his whole brain turn to mush.
"Oh fuck, f–fuck," Stolas panted, his eyes darting frantically around Blitzø's body. He didn't seem to know what to do with his hands, first grabbing around Blitzø's waist and then moving to his upper arms, then planting themselves on his chest. Then he leaned back and took them off of his body entirely, staring at them with a furrowed brow. "S–sorry, I…"
Blitzø leaned forward and grabbed his hands and pulled them close to his chest. Stolas' beak snapped shut and he stared down at him, his frame illuminated only slightly from the city lights outside. His feathers were all askew, his shirt was too big, his shorts were too short, he had Blitzø's cock buried all the way in him, and when he looked at him with those big red eyes Blitzø was left nearly speechless.
Nearly.
"You're so fucking pretty, Stolas."
Stolas' eyes widened and his hands twitched in Blitzø's grasp.
"Really?" he asked, voice nearly a whisper.
Dumbest fucking question ever, and he hated that it was genuine.
"Mmmhm."
Stolas blinked at him and slowly slid his hands out of Blitzø's grasp and up to his shoulders. He held them firmly before he started lifting his hips up and down.
It felt fucking incredible, and Blitzø reached forward to slip his hands under the hem of his shirt and dig his claws into his feathery waist again. He stared up at Stolas as he fucked himself on Blitzø's dick, letting the owl take the lead and move at his own pace, reminding him again and again how pretty and perfect he was.
When he felt the owl's walls starting to flutter around him he shut his eyes for a few seconds, trying to hold out for as long as he could. When he reopened them, Stolas' pupils looked like little hearts, and he felt his own heart thudding hard in his chest. Stolas was riding him faster now, panting and moaning and making all these little sounds that only made Blitzø's heart beat harder.
It hit him very suddenly, how badly he wanted to tell Stolas that he loved him, because he did and he had for a long time. He wanted to tell him that he loved him and wanted him to stay forever. He wanted to tell him that he was sorry for being too stupid to see it sooner, and promise he'd never be that stupid again.
But he didn't, because Stolas had just woken up from a nightmare and was fucking him because he was freaked out and needed something to distract him. Stolas could barely bring himself to get up most days to eat breakfast, and it was rare for him to make it past noon without crying. He didn't look in mirrors and screamed whenever Blitzø tried to take a picture of him. He didn't need another thing complicating his life and putting extra pressure on him.
He just needed someone to be there for him, so that's what Blitzø would do, even if he wanted to do so much more.
"I… I… I…" Stolas panted, and Blitzø could feel the owl's legs shaking on either side of him.
Blitzø slid his hands down further. One hand gripped his hips tight, and the other moved over until he was able to reach his thumb into the opening of the shorts and start rubbing little circles against Stolas' clit. Stolas cried out and shook, digging his talons painfully into Blitzø's shoulders as he did. Blitzø kept going until he felt Stolas' walls fluttering around him and a rush of wetness on the base of his dick. Stolas was slumping against him, panting and crying as his body shook.
"You good, birdie?" Blitzø whispered, still rubbing circles against him but much softer now, as Stolas continued to twitch against him.
Stolas didn't answer for a few moments, but then he sat up slightly and stared down at Blitzø like he'd hung up the moon and the fucking stars for him. He shakily reached forward and grabbed Blitzø's cheeks, stroking them gently as he opened his beak.
"W–will you cum in me?"
Blitzø didn't have to be asked twice. In fact, he nearly did right then, but he managed to get a few good thrusts in before he honored the owl's request.
They didn't bother to clean up after, opting to tuck themselves back into their pajamas and saying they'd deal with it tomorrow. Stolas asked him to stay on the couch with him for the rest of the night, which Blitzø was happy to oblige.
The three words he really wanted to say kept bouncing around in his head, but he kept them there, promising himself that some day he'd be able to say them out loud.
They both fell asleep pretty quick, and Stolas slept all the way until morning without any more nightmares.