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If Lee Areum has to be honest with herself, she would admit that she wasn’t even aware of Seo Yujin’s existence—at first, at least; her attention was usually on those who were scrambling away or stomping towards her whenever she’s at school. Because Yujin did neither, she blended perfectly with the monotone shades of the classroom walls to Areum. It didn't help that Areum usually tend to cocoon herself in a dark corner of the classroom trying to avoid her peers, talking to the wind instead about her troubles with exasperated murmurs. She truly wasn't planning on gaining any friends that school year. As it turns out, however, she somehow managed to get three—one of them she was willing to lay down her life on the line.
It was raining when she first met Yujin. Soaking in the solitude she had, Areum was waiting for the rain to subside; her eyes were deadpanning at the rumbling clouds as though the gods above have personally brought down such heavy rain for sadistic punishment when she saw a creepy Cheshire grin at the corner of her eye. What the fuck. Frantic, she shuffled away as though a squirrel whose tail was set on fire whilst the girl who spooked Areum was still tilting her head in that same amused manner. Areum’s eyes were caught between the iron-cladded school gates and the soul devouring candy-red eyes of the ravenette with a bewildered frown.
“You have an umbrella.”
“I know.” Then why aren't you using it?
Areum wasn’t sure why the girl kept staring at her with gleaming eyes as though waiting for Areum to say something specifically but it was starting to make her nervous. Does she not know how to open it? Hopefully that isn't the case. Areum didn't want to teach a teenager the basics even a child knows, no matter how breathtakingly pretty they were. This girl must be really popular.
“Are you waiting for your parents to pick you up?” Areum managed to ask, giving a sheepish smile as she awkwardly looked towards the school's entrance as if waiting for a black limousine to pop into existence. She could feel the girl's questioning stare on her and Areum could imagine the grin on her face was cheesing wider. Not wanting to see if her guess was correct, Areum simply kept counting the number of rain drops.
“Nope~.” With ease, the girl replied all jolly and Areum could hear drowned patter of heels dancing on the platform. She was now moving in front of Areum's line of sight with a mischievous snigger, hands clasped behind her back. God, she's so pretty. Areum felt her cheeks flushed when she realized she could feel a cloud of warmth from the bewitching girl's exhale; it was near her own set of lips as well. Areum saw how girl's blood-red eyes crinkled in satisfaction when she scurried away but thankfully, she didn't comment on how Areum seemed to shrink in embarrassment over her own reaction.
“Are you waiting for your friends then?” Hopeful, she quickly changed the subject just for the girl turned away with a choked cough. Ok, now that's just rude. Between the two of them, isn't she more perplexing than Areum? Why was she still standing there when she has a perfectly-shaped umbrella? Was this a new trend amongst her peers to wait under the roof or something? At first, Areum thought maybe she was waiting for her other friends to go home together. Now that wasn't the case... a lover? Huh. Why did she feel disappointed?
“Gosh, I swear you're so cute, Areum!”
Caught off-guard, Areum was engulfed by a mash of abyssal scarlet as the two toppled onto the platform with an Oof and a solo of giggles. Baffling as the tackle was, Areum was even more concerned whether she suffered brain damage from cushioning the fall; she felt her annoyance chipped away just because of the beaming smile above her face. It had her awestricken but also riddled with longing. When was the last time someone had smiled so genuinely at her? Her uncle was the only one she could vaguely recall but even then, it had been a while since he had visited her. Perhaps he was sick of her too. Everyone was, and this girl? It was possible that the girl has never heard rumors about Areum from the way her smile didn't cut like razors or the fact that she hadn't strangled Areum simply out of pure fear. Perhaps she only knew of Areum's name and nothing else; though it was, however, impossible not to know the eldritch tales surrounding Areum. And if she didn't know, Areum has to tell her. Then, she would go away. That was what Areum wanted, wasn’t it—having no friends? It would be better not to entertain any thoughts about friendship at all. They hardly ever last anyways and this one? Areum was sure it was born to die.
“Where did you hear my name from? I’ve never seen you before.” She does seem older.
“Ouch, you sure don’t mince your words… I’m your classmate? We sort of shared the same classroom for the past five months and group projects?? Oh! And my name is Seo Yujin, by the way! Do you remember now?” Wait, we already knew each other??
The girl, Yujin, looked sheepish; awkwardly scratched her head but still wore the same bubbly smile, her eyes searching for any hint of recognition in Areum. Areum had none. To her, this was their first meeting, and for that, she felt awful of already not living up to Yujin's expectations. It didn't help that Areum usually just writes down her ideas from the get go and tends to give one of the members of the group project she was working on so that she can get away with not conversing. In hindsight, she realized just how lazy that looked and Yujin probably an eyewitness to it firsthand; Areum was seconds away from grabbing a shovel to dig for her own grave.
“Sorry, no… I don’t even remember what I ate this morning,” replying hesitantly, Areum tilted her head slightly as she memorized every detail of Yujin, trying her best to recall any segment regarding Yujin inside her memories; the efforts came to naught, however. Thank the stars, Yujin didn't seem too bothered as she patted Areum’s shoulder with dramatic gratitude and what seemed like proud, teary eyes over how Areum cared enough to even try to recall. Areum thought Yujin lost her mind.
“As I was saying, I’m waiting for someone special to share my umbrella with since all my friends are off with their boyfriends, leaving little old me alone,” Yujin sniffled with a dash of dramatic flair and puppy eyes, and Areum wasn’t sure if she should chuckle or feel bad. Maybe both. She was well aware that at their age, romance always seemed to be an aspiring fantasy and Areum herself wanted to be loved deep down as well. She understood, and who was she to judge anyway? However, the mention of someone special to Yujin yet again brought forward a strange type of hollowness which dampened the light-hearted mood.
“Um, and where is that person?” Areum asked curiously whilst patting Yujin’s back with long awkward pauses in between. Was this how people comfort other people? Areum was, unfortunately, out of depth when it came to things such as this but she didn’t want one more bad impression to be added to her reputation list of creepy things. People already thought that she wasn't human. No need to prove them right.
“Well, that person is the cutest in the whole wide world!” Cute? Not handsome?
"Uh huh…”
“They’re always brooding while looking out the window, reciting an internal monologue.” Wow, sounds like a douchebag if he's ignoring her.
Why did it sound so familiar to Areum? Areum nodded along with a strained smile as Yujin continued to list down 100 more things about the love of her life: how she met him, how cool he is amidst chaos, how kind he is deep down, etc. It was sweet to hear how much Yujin adored that person but as how some candies go—once the sugar coat melted away, the bitterness started to seep in. And Areum resented herself for that. Her ears were trained to the melodious way Yujin pronounced her syllables whilst her eyes were on the pouring rain. It gazed back and mirroring her conflictions, it wept like a woman scorned.
“So, who is he?” Areum lightly prodded as the two leaned against the chilly-pale wall—lazily counted the number of lightning strikes. Yujin was head over heels over that person. It was obvious with the way Yujin gushed, blushed and grumbled over him—that and the faraway look she'd get as if Yujin was lost in a fantasy dreamland. Which was why when she saw Yujin's smile dropped, her stomach plummeted as well. Did she say something wrong again? Really, she just can't seem to do anything right. She knew she wasn't meant for friendships- were they even friends?? ... What was she doing? She hardly knew the girl at all. Despite this, why couldn't she turn the other cheek of what Yujin thought, what she felt? She shouldn't, Areum knew, but perhaps her stunted heart still yearned to imitate that of a real one. That was the only explanation Areum had for her emotions. Perhaps she had been deprived of normalcy for so long, her desires were gushing out from the sewers of her heart.
“She, Areum. A girl,” Yujin mumbled under her breath but Areum heard nonetheless. Oh.
“Who is she?”
Areum tried to brighten up the mood as much as she could whilst one thought bombarded her mind: girls could like girls romantically? Or perhaps she was simply overthinking. Perhaps Yujin meant her best friend?? If Areum had a best friend, she would probably gush about them too the way Yujin did—though really, would she? She couldn't picture herself doing that but perhaps it was different for someone like Yujin. To Areum, Yujin seemed like an affectionate person who clings to people and make everyone feel special in their own way. Maybe that was why Yujin looked disappointed at Areum’s reaction because Areum jumped conclusion to romance. Yes, that actually might be the case.
“Actually, it's you, Areum." I'm sorry- what?! Areum kept her mouth shut to see which direction the conversation was going—though, her head was overheating despite the cool weather. "I want to share my umbrella with you,” Yujin looked cautiously hopeful—tracking and deciphering Areum's mannerism in a way a prey would; waiting for the right time to steal triumphantly or run away defeated. However, the prey it seemed- to Areum- was her instead, feeling as though a deer in headlights as she mulled over the offer with a repeated mantra that blared: As friends. There's nothing more. Nothing. Don't overthink. With that, she took a deep breath to calm her nerves before shrugging lightly, trying her best to look unbothered.
“Well, that’s lucky. I wanted to ask if we’re friends now, as well.”
Yujin looked as though Areum had slapped her across the face. She managed to quickly school her expression, however, back to her previously light-hearted one accompanied with a shrug that felt too heavy. Areum’s mind malfunctioned again when she caught a flash of Yujin's crestfallen expression however; panicked, she tried to break down what she had uttered and conducting an analysis to somehow figure out where she managed to shoot herself at the foot. Alas, Yujin was the first person Areum had a decent conversation with—her first actual social experiment if you'll have it. She couldn't think of any error.
Silence—the silence from Yujin was suffocating Areum and she herself was contemplating for the nth time on why she cared so much about this random girl's feelings when she couldn't care less of her own. The rain drops kept were now caressing against the pebbles, old bricks and crying leaves, singing a choir so deafening—the silence started to feel less cluster phobic. Alas, it didn't last very long. At the corner of her eye, she could see the Yujin's glassy dull eyes peaking behind her long black hair; the hair was curtaining her face as if to shut the unwanted out and Areum felt even more terrible. Perhaps it was audacious of Areum to ask Yujin to be her friend. Maybe Yujin already knows about the rumors and was just playing nice but now she was disgusted over Areum?
“I’m so sorry if I said something wrong- “ Areum started but Yujin quickly cut her off. “No, no, it’s fine. It’s on me, I- “
Yujin shook her head—a pause—before she let out a long sigh. Then as if nothing happened, she spun around cartoonish with a renewed beaming smile, hands on her hips confidently. Areum scanned around for any hidden cameras. Was she not mad and was simply teasing? The change in attitude was giving her a whiplash and she was sure this rich girl was going to force pay every dime if Areum truly ended up in ER.
“Well, my dear friend Areum, would you care to share this umbrella of mine with me?” Why do I have the feeling she's going to smack me with it?
“I- fine. You’re weirdly talking in cursive but alright.”
Areum let out a relieved smile as Yujin giddily opened the umbrella instead of doing what Areum thought she would. Additionally, she even took Areum hand in her own to guide under the umbrella. The gesture warmed Areum's cheeks once again and she took another deep sets of inhale to stable herself—she even scooted slightly away from the center to make more room for Yujin. Luckily, Yujin didn't notice. Outside of the school, the streets and shops blurred as the two walked by, till the only thing Areum could focus on was the hard-working umbrella roofing above and its color; the black matched that of Yujin's hair and school bag while it illuminated her maroon eyes further, the reflection ricocheting into an eerie glow. No, an eerily pretty glow, Areum corrected herself. Her new friend had such mesmerizing eyes, Areum wanted to gorge out her own; they are not worthy to gaze upon such masterpiece.
Yujin's fingers were corpse-cold compared to Areum's own—coiling around with a vise grip, and Areum found herself wondering if she had more friends, would their hands make hers feel as complete as Yujin's was doing? They would, right? Perhaps she should ask Yujin tomorrow about that. She has tons of friends so perhaps she could share some insight over that. Areum looked forward to that.
As Areum's house was closer to school, Yujin pestered to make it their first stop instead of her own and Areum reluctantly agreed after Yujin let her pay for their tteokbokki on their way back. They wanted to go for Karaoke as well but decided against it as there would be a test tomorrow. Along the way, Yujin talked whilst Areum listened, tuning in with comments after every gossip. If she knew having friends makes her heart soar, she would have put herself out there and talked with classmates more. Or perhaps it was simply because her new friend is Yujin. Who else would be willing to stand her who has prophetic nightmares? Addition to that, all those premonitions are the worst possible ones as well. Areum had heard so many threats and insults all her life that because of them that, at times, even she herself wonders if she was human or not. But here Yujin was, treating her like one so she must be one, Areum thought. And then she prayed. She prayed that this wasn’t a dream as well.
She waved Yujin goodbye with a hesitant smile when she opened the door to her house. Yujin did the same—though hers was an overjoyed smile—before skipping away in the rain without a care in the world. Areum watched till Yujin was out of sight—in case she slipped and fell—before heading back inside. Rummaging the fridge for dinner before deciding against it, she ate a simple bowl of rice topped with diced ham along with some kimchi and fried eggs. She finished showering after she studied, then wore her pajamas and laid down in bed. She thought back to the way Yujin's lips would curl when she was plotting or gossiping something scandalous; the way her eyelashes were curled and proper, incredibly dreamy-looking; that when she looked into Yujin's eyes, she could recite all variants of red by heart. Her first friend has already won her heart, whether Yujin knew it or not. Perhaps tomorrow, she would do it again. Unbeknownst to Areum, tomorrow never came as she thought it would—and the first sign of blood began in a classroom, a sickeningly familiar shadow, and that darn bloody dreamscape of hers.