Chapter Text
Summer of 1997
Somewhere in England.
“So you’re all here too, huh…” Amelia whispered under her breath.
The blonde girl sat in a chair, twiddling her thumbs as her blue eyes darted between the people in the room who stared at her curiously. She had hoped that it wouldn’t come to this, but of course someone had to snitch that Amelia might be into girls.
Amelia looked around and spotted her sister by the corner of the room, trying to hide her presence behind a couch’s pillow, so she asked,
“Were you aware of this, Maddie?”
“Not any more than you do, I bet…”
Madeleine replied, hiding behind the pillow, as if she hated reality and wanted to jump into a world where she wouldn't be trapped in the same place as her twin sister at that moment. It wasn’t as if she hated her; she just hated everything about being the centre of attention.
“Damn.” Amelia clicked her tongue, not wanting to escalate her twin’s anxiety even more. She decided to put off trying to guess whether or not her sister was scared or just hiding something from her.
While trying not to pay attention to herself by acting extremely freaked out and embarrassed, she heard someone hide a laugh with a cough.
“I can’t imagine a world where you actually get caught for doing something so… ridiculous, and yet, here you are, да?”
Amelia held back a groan when she heard that. She knew from the Russian accent that it was the worst person to be in the same room with. If Amelia had to choose between staying in a pool full of piranhas and this girl, then Amelia would choose the former without a second thought.
She knew this girl would push her into the pool anyway, to spite her even more, which made her pissed that her hypothetical situation seemed so realistic in the end.
As if that was the biggest problem in life and not the fact that it’s fucking stupid how the girls were forced to stay in even closer proximity with each other if they were suspected to be involved in a scandal, which involved liking other girls.
Amelia concluded that the Nuns were not the brightest apples of the bunch, but she had high hopes that they’d see this whole catholic retreat to remove the homosexual thoughts disguised as a “Summer Camp” thing would be a bust.
‘Hell if I know anything about liking other girls, I don’t even see them like that.’ Amelia grumbled in her mind, shifting in her seat at the weight of the stares that were still locked on her humiliated and flustered state.
Amelia knew who these girls were; it was hard not to, since they all basically grew up under the same roof. Boarding school does that to you. Hogwarts wasn’t even close to how boarding school was presented for girls. Amelia lived in a constant state of mental distress from having to deal with other girls who idolise her; don’t get me wrong.
But all that constant attention put a lot of stress on her shoulders; oftentimes, she envied how her twin sister, who, if no one noticed her existence, could blend into the shadows well without anyone even noticing a thing.
But within this room, she knew the particular set of girls and why they might be here to “repent”. Amelia agreed with the Nuns; they should deeply repent for having disappointed their parents and for putting all of that effort into sinning with other girls.
Felicia Vargas, the bouncy Italian girl, smiled. “I wonder why she’s here?” She whispered to her twin next to her. The other girl, Chiara Vargas, rolled her eyes and clicked her tongue. With a hand on her hip, she said,
“Couldn't care less, Cazzo…” flipping her hair back over her shoulder, looking away from Amelia, who still didn’t know why she had to be there.
The Blonde girl could kind of guess why Felicia was branded as too “tomboy-ish” for her own good, whether it be too loud or too confident, and Chiara refused to even associate with any boys during any interschool event involving another boarding school.
The Nuns' suspicions were absolute. Once they hunted down their targets, they weren’t going to stop until all the victims were reverted to the better path of being a true woman. Amelia didn’t know how the Nuns cracked down on the two Italians; someone really must’ve hated them to the deepest depths of the earth if they wanted the girls to end up in this position.
“You could at least be a little nicer, Chiara—”
“You think I don’t know that, you bastard?!”
While the Vargas twins were busy having their one-sided arguments, the other girls also fell into a similar category of talking amongst each other as if this wasn’t all a hazing ritual for Amelia.
Anastasia Braginskaya smiled, but even with Amelia’s disadvantageous position, she couldn’t see if that creepy smile reached the Russian’s eyes. In that moment, it felt like Anastasia trapped the two of them in a bubble, and all Amelia could feel was how heavy the room felt, the eyes on her back stabbing into her soul.
“And who would’ve thought the great Amelia O. Väinämöinen would be part of this ‘Summer’ Camp.”
Anastasia remarked, dripping with an almost pitiful sigh. The American girl wished to shut the taller up, looking all smug like she was the one who put Amelia in this position, but from Amelia’s perspective, then she might as well be the one who did it.
Wang Chun-yan nearly pulled her hair out; she didn’t have the patience for anything, and she was itching to hurry up this whole activity. “Yah! I don’t care! Where is the Dorm Supervisor when we need her?” Chun-yan complained.
“Now, now, Chun-yan, this shouldn’t be made into a big issue—“ Anastasia tried to rein in the other girl, but Chun-yan hissed in her direction like a wild cat. The Chinese girl refused to admit defeat; admitting defeat was admitting that her parents were right and that she also had a serious “problem” to deal with, particularly with liking the same sex.
“Braginskaya! Do you approve of this? It does not make me happy at all! This is highly inappropriate, and I wish to leave this place at this instant!”
Chun-yan complained, the slight accent rolling off her tongue like she was still back in China and not in England, where ‘proper etiquette’ was the norm. Anastasia’s stance never changed; she didn’t flinch even when she was in Chun-yan’s hitting distance and vicinity, and her hands stayed in front of her like the elegant girl that she was supposed to be.
If you asked Amelia to point out where that etiquette was in England, then she couldn’t tell you one bit.
Anastasia picked up Chun-yan by the collar like a real cat, still smiling as if that expression would never leave her face. Not once has she faltered as Chun-yan was moving about in the air, too much energy for such a small girl.
‘Out of all of the girls that had to be part of this fucking experiment— why did it have to be Braginskaya?!’
Amelia whined in her head; she wanted to knock herself out unconscious once she realised the Russian girl never stopped staring at her.
‘Oh god, now what does she want from me— I didn’t say all of that out loud, did I? Oh fuck, oh fuck—’ The American closed her eyes out of instinct, hoping that if she can’t see the Russian girl, then the latter doesn’t see her either.
‘Man, maybe Maddie was right about being able to hide yourself even in a group setting; that cool supernatural ability would be really helpful by now!’
She willed herself to suddenly gain the ability to hide her presence, but after a few minutes of nothing happening, she opened one eye, and Anastasia was still staring at her. That nasty glint in her eyes that Amelia translated as mocking.
Amelia O. Väinämöinen was at this point, holding back her voice and holding back her tears; she didn’t want to be here either, but she had to stay strong, her nails on her knees scraped her skin from the anxiety.
She could feel herself having trouble holding back her sniffling, and the Dorm Supervisor, the Nun that brought her here, via the letter that every homosexually accused girl received, apparently hadn’t arrived yet from wherever she went.
“Are you alright, Amelia?”
She felt a gentle hand rest on her shoulder. Amelia knew that touch anywhere and turned to face the other girl. It was her best friend, Sakura Honda. Someone who Amelia considered to have a soul akin to that of the blossoming cherry trees that fall when the time is right.
And she fell into her eyes the moment Sakura comforted the blonde. “I’m sorry to repeat, but are you sure you’re okay, Amelia?” The slight accent made Amelia’s heart soften. It was a curious thing; how did Sakura and Chun-yan maintain their accents even after years of being in London?
“Thank you, Sakura. I’m just a little dizzy from all of this. I wasn’t made aware it’d be this kind of camp after all, hahaha…” Amelia hoped that the excuse she thought of on the spot was enough for her best friend to dismiss her.
Amelia knew all of this had to have been because of what happened last week, before the semester ended. Amelia had gotten up late because of several factors, one of which had something to do with Madeleine, who turned off all their alarms, leaving Amelia to scramble an hour late and definitely hadn't eaten any breakfast that morning.
The Boarding School’s Cafeteria had a set time for Breakfast, Brunch, Lunch, and Dinner. Once you missed out on a set time, then you had no choice but to tough it out or somehow make it outside and buy food without being caught.
Amelia always had Madeleine set multiple sets of alarms that rang one after the other, but they had fought the night before about something minor, and Madeleine, out of spite, took out the alarm clock’s plug so it wouldn’t ring. Waking up early was always easier for the younger twin, and left Amelia to survive on her own.
“Fucking— I’m gonna beat Maddie’s ass after this… not waking me up because I pissed her off yesterday— what’s her deal?!”
Running through the halls, she had missed her alarm blaring into her ears again, and it turned out her twin sister, Madeleine, had left her behind to fend for herself. She made a detour to the lockers and fixed her uniform and hair so that she could lie and say she came from the bathroom to touch up.
There were barely any classes left as the boarding school was nearing its summer vacation, which meant the students read their parents’ letters and started to pack up for the upcoming months ahead of time.
And among those who were ecstatic, Amelia was one of them. She may have been considered a wayward student, but she still followed some of the rules that were imposed- not all of them, but just the major ones.
She smiled at herself in her locker’s mirror and fixed up her basic makeup. Too much was a bad sign, but too little meant she had to look like she hadn’t bathed in weeks. A demure balance of both made sure that she was still the attention grabber among her peers after all.
“You had to keep your reputation stable to weave through life without a sweat!” Amelia said to herself that she loved having motivational quotes that kept her energy flowing and adrenaline rushing throughout her body.
A Nun walked by her and sighed loudly, making Amelia jump a little, and with a nervous smile, she ran away to her class that day— albeit a little late, but who’d blame her?
It was the last day of school, after all; what was there to learn? How to have fun? Well, sign her up! She happily jogged up to her classroom and saw how laissez-faire the atmosphere was. Her classmates were lounging around, and there wasn’t a teacher in sight.
She ran all that distance for nothing, but she shrugged it off, heading over to her assigned seat, and Sakura was by her side, reading one of her smuggled manga books.
Sakura hummed when she realised the blond was next to her, and Amelia tilted her head and asked, “Is that a new volume or something?” Poking Sakura’s cheek.
The Japanese girl moved away from the physical distraction smoothly and replied, “Yes, it is a new volume for this week. I’m glad you caught that.” Turning the manga page, she was reading in Amelia’s direction.
Amelia’s blue eyes scanned the confusing characters of kanji and hiragana and squinted, failing to understand what was going on with the dialogue, but the scene looked like it came out of a generic romance novel.
Not that she was one to judge what someone else reads. She had way worse interests than the foreign girl, aside from her need to have a rebellious streak now and then, which would definitely put one of the Nuns in a coma.
Drinking at a bar with a fake ID that somehow hadn't gotten her in trouble yet, smoking after every exam season to get her mind off of barely passing her classes, getting high to escape how her mind was thinking about how she was the reason her family broke apart, and possibly all of the above. If there was a vice, then there was a way to achieve it.
Maddie, the best twin sister ever, always covered for her even late at night. When Amelia would drunkenly stumble around the side gardens and smell the flowers, giggling to herself. Maddie would always have that gut instinct, and she could find her twin sister before the Nuns even had the chance to suspect anything.
Now Amelia thinks that was one of the reasons she was brought here, too. Maybe it was her constant risk factor and deliberate decision-making skills— which she still thought were very crucial to a teenager’s success in having a great phase of her life— and someone might’ve snitched that she smoked too.
So she knew a thing or two about hiding something completely against the rules. No matter how much the Nuns see Amelia as their innocent and pure little girl, who they raised to be a perfect servant of the lord, there was no stopping the blonde from fulfilling a life of impulsivity.
“A new volume? It’s not like… a complete series yet?” Amelia asked, extremely confused. She wasn’t as into manga series as much as Sakura was, but she hoped that her curiosity could help her grow closer to the foreign girl.
Sakura’s eyes widened a little; she chuckled softly and shook her head. “No, it’s a completely new ongoing series. It’s quite a fun read; would you like to read it, Amelia?” She moved forward to offer up the manga, but Amelia got flustered with how close she was and waved her off.
“N-no thanks, I’m enjoying your comments enough as it is, haha…” Amelia managed to choke out, holding back how quickly she looked away from the other girl as Sakura went back to read silently, enjoying how the sunlight hit her pages perfectly so that she didn’t need to move closer to read it clearly.
“Mm…” Sakura was suspicious, but she decided to throw the thought away and focused on what she was reading.
Amelia took a glance at the clock; it was barely eight am, and she didn’t know what to do with the rest of her free time. Usually, she ran to her cheer practice, but all she saw outside by the field were the other girls in their respective cliques laughing with each other or hanging out.
No one seemed to be interested in doing any schoolwork now that the year was finally over and they could all relax for the summer.
By the lockers, Amelia opened hers with a fervour. She wanted to get her stuff fast, so that she wouldn't have to detour back to the hallway when she forgot something. Madeleine peeked into her locker. What a coincidence that the twins had theirs side-by-side.
There was a collage of magazine cut-outs of girls, pretty girls, stuck on the side of her locker. Madeleine shook her head, but she knew she was no better.
“I wonder what Äiti is going to cook for me back at home. Are you sure you're alright with staying in London alone?” Amelia asked concerningly. It was hard having parents who were separated. It sucks that Amelia’s parents live across Europe.
Madeleine let out a quiet giggle. She knew that Amelia couldn't stand having to be separated during holidays, but what could they do? The court decided to separate the twins. Madeleine would be lying if she said she didn't want to go to Stockholm or Tampere sometimes, and she knew Amelia felt the same with London and Toulouse.
“You act as if I cry every time you leave. We've done this for years, Amelia.” Lies. Madeleine does cry at night whenever Amelia leaves without telling her goodbye; losing your other half might as well be equal to losing your way of life.
Amelia sighed and closed her locker. Judging by how everyone seemed so carefree, the rest of the day was going to be the girls talking amongst each other and packing their things. The more extroverted one between the two was planning on lying low and hoping that her friends had the same idea.
Madeleine seemed like she had other plans as she called over the boisterous silver-haired girl who entered the hall with booming laughter.
“Julia! Over here!”
“Maddie!—”
The girl responded by engulfing Madeleine in a hug. From Amelia’s perspective, it seemed a bit too close for comfort, but Madeleine hadn't been one to let other people into her life so easily, so Amelia could forgive this behaviour. Anything to see Madeleine with that smile on her face.
‘Do they really have to do that in public? There is no reason to do that, is there?’ Amelia’s smile was strained as she looked away from the entire situation, focusing on anything but her twin sister and her best friend.
“How are ya, Mads? I hope Sister Dominica and Sister Rita didn't berate ya too much about ya know…” Julia looked around before continuing, lowering her voice so that only Madeleine heard her whisper, “Your hockey games.” Julia’s red eyes sparkled with worry.
It wasn't as though Madeleine was banned from playing for the school; the Nuns just hated the fact that the school was allowed to do this. They'd much rather have their esteemed students focus on becoming the best women that God made them to be.
And Amelia, ever since she was a child, couldn't help but agree. She was taught to find joy in the duties and servitude of a housewife, the way your partner would provide, and she would be in charge of the household work. It felt like a good reason to gain power over land— and over the people that lived in your home.
But at the same time, it also felt like something that crept up Amelia’s throat. She doesn’t know why, but it had always been like this whenever her parents— not that she didn’t love them, of course, she did; they gave her a great childhood, even if it was only for a year or so— but what they were doing with each other seemed wrong.
The way they cuddled in each other’s arms, kissed lips to lips, caressed each other’s faces, and the way they spoke in such hushed tones of sweet, mystifying whispers. It all felt like that was not what they were supposed to do.
Amelia could blame it all on the way she was raised, all she wanted, but she knew it was something deep down inside her that made her feel like throwing up whenever she saw girls too close to each other— like Maddie and Julia talking to one another, but they were so close their chests were centimetres apart from each other.
“What’s got your face twisted, Amelia? Are you hungry?” Felicia popped out of nowhere, and the blonde girl stumbled back against her locker from the sudden appearance. Felicia placed her hand on her hips and laughed. If Amelia had any rival, then it would definitely be the Italian right in front of her.
“Not everyone is hungry, Feli. God, why do you always think with your stomach? Use your brain, you dumbass!” Chiara pulled on Felicia’s ponytail, snarling at her twin sister. Felicia couldn’t believe the physical assault, and she pinched her sister in the side.
“Well, I’m just trying to be nice! Ever think about that, Chiara?” Felicia frowned, crossing her arms and levelling her eyes towards Chiara, not wanting to back down so easily. It felt like a war was about to happen, and Amelia would rather not be part of that.
“Girls, please—” Sakura tried to intervene but was pulled aside by Amelia, not wanting the frail girl to be in between two frustrated Italians who would stop at nothing to prove the other was wrong, on all fronts.
And with that, the Italian sisters started fighting in their native language. It was one of the few moments where Amelia could admire how stubborn Chiara was, and as the blonde’s eyes looked over at Felicia, she always wondered how it felt to have someone like her to pamper her and give her lots of food.
Oh god, all of this thinking was starting to make her hungrier by the second. They really needed to get out of here, or she was going to eat her unused magazine clippings.
Chiara elbowed Felicia’s arm, causing the younger of the two to back away with a childish pout, but she was distracted by the appearance of yet another member of Amelia’s clique.
If you could even call it one.
“Monika! Monika! Buongiorno!” The German said nothing as she opened her arms, ready to be hugged to death by an eager Felicia, who jumped into Monika’s strong arms. Chiara facepalmed and wanted to drag her sister away from the taller one, lest they incur any questioning from the Nuns again.
“Guten Morgen, Felicia.”
“Ve…”
And from that alone, Felicia hung by Monika’s arm, happily smiling as Chiara groaned dramatically, wondering if she punched the blond muscular girl, then she’ll get a one-way ticket to hell.
Since half of the group was together now, they decided to skip the rest of the school day to hang out in the nearby mall. Sitting on a few chairs, and in their hands were ice creams that they all bought to cope with the summer heat.
Amelia was just happy that they were out of that place, even if it was just for a few hours; she ate her ice cream with such gusto that she went ahead and bought it multiple times in a row. Madeleine should've been surprised, but she wasn't; this was just how her gluttonous twin was.
“Is your maple ice cream good? Who invented that flavour anyway!” Julia said, her own vanilla ice cream topped off with lots of sprinkles that could rival anything that came from America.
“Eat properly, you're supposed to be une femme élégante (elegant lady), Julia…” Madeleine’s gentle voice broke through Julia’s thoughts as the blonde wiped off the ice cream that landed on the older woman’s lips. Julia’s eyes widened, and she nuzzled her nose happily against Madeleine’s soft cheeks.
“Ils n'arrêteront pas de te harceler à propos de ton apparence, à moins que tu n'aies l'air d'être en pleine forme.” (They won't stop hounding you about your appearance, unless you look like you're in top shape.)
Madeleine whispered into the silver-haired girl’s ear; oh, how Julia loved it when Madeleine spoke in Québécois. It made Julia feel special— that she gets to be the only one who hears the not-so-shy blonde this way.
“So if I may ask, what are you guys doing for the summer vacation?” Sakura asked, eating her own strawberry ice cream like a proper lady. Amelia shrugged while the others burst into suggestions of what they could all do.
“I’m going to Tampere for the summer; my Äiti has wanted me back there since last year.” Amelia tilted her head, her eyes drifting off to watch the random people passing by, wondering what they had in their little shopping bags.
“Chiara and I are spending it in Barcelona!” Felicia poked her twin’s cheeks, laughing along with how Chiara puffed them, annoyed. They had finished their own cup of gelato, even after complaining that it wasn’t as good as Italian Gelato.
Chiara wasn’t too opposed, but she had other plans in mind. “Or Madrid; either one would be fun.” The twins were lucky that their guardian— foster mom was rich enough to afford houses all over Spain.
Monika hummed, thinking about it deeply. They weren’t planning on going back to Germany any time soon, and she doubted her older sister had wanted to go back since her place was in London, and the person Julia loved the most was staying in the city.
“Schwester, where should we spend our summer?” “We should hang out by the beach!”
Julia exclaimed. Monika wasn’t too surprised by the sudden interruption, as it was a normal occurrence when your older sister was always a burst of energy.
Madeleine thought about it, but then she realised she was staying with her parents within the city, so she couldn’t hang out with the others in the end. Amelia noticed this and patted her sister’s shoulder; the other twin was grateful for this silent reassurance.
Arriving back at their house in the rural area of London felt like they were entering a whole new world. Madeleine was fine with going alone, but of course, Amelia insisted that she needed to be there, to be her twin sister’s strong and courageous hero.
The next morning, Amelia woke up and began to feel like her legs were sore from having to pack and unpack her things. She went down to the kitchen and saw her Mum preparing food, immediately feeling like her stomach was going to be hating her for the rest of the day when it was her in particular cooking.
Alice turned and smiled at her eldest, “Good morning, poppet, feel free to eat something before you head on over to the airport, mm?” She said, pulling out a baking tin from the oven, and even from how far Amelia was, she could smell the burnt scones from the stairs.
“T-thanks… but I'll eat when I get home in Tampere…” Amelia hoped that her flight pass was still in her bag and that she didn’t accidentally drop it somewhere on the bus. “Oh, don’t be so embarrassed, I made you lots so you and Madeleine will have something to eat!” Alice puffed her cheeks in response.
Amelia sighed. There was no fighting her on this; the only thing that her mom would fight against was their other mom, who was currently having her morning self-care shower. It typically lasts for an hour at most, so no one bothered her to hurry, and Maddie was probably still asleep.
Alice shrugged her shoulders, setting the scones on four individual plates, and went on to make tea and coffee for the sleepy members of the family. “Oh, and before I forget, there’s a letter addressed to you and Madeleine. I hope it’s not what I’m thinking, Amelia.” Alice narrowed her eyes at her daughter, from green to her blue ones.
The eldest twin rolled her eyes, lazily walking over to the table next to the entrance and glancing at the random letters, two of which were really addressed to the twins, from their school. Now that got Amelia wondering if she had actually done something wrong unknowingly.
Dear guardians of Amelia O. Väinämöinen, your child has been chosen to attend a mandatory school activity. This is the “New World Academy’s Extraordinary Summer Camp”; it runs for the whole Summer Vacation Period. This program is to ensure that your child is following God’s path, and with the venerable Nuns’ guidance, they will be sure to erase any trace of your child’s sins.
Amelia had to do a quick double take, then triple, then a fourth— then she had to check if this was real or not. Putting the letter above a light so she could see if there were any hidden clues that someone might’ve sent for her, there were none.
God’s path?
Nuns’ guidance?
She doesn’t need anyone else’s words except her own! She runs her fingers through her already dishevelled blonde hair, wondering what she’ll have to tell her Mum. Their Mama would be fine with this; she might even say something about the non-existent French genes overpowering Amelia’s Swedish-Finnish ones.
Checking Madeleine’s garnered the same result; they were supposed to attend some form of program that would erase their sins, whatever they were. They should’ve told her before she got her ticket. Amelia had to cancel her flight, and now she had to tell her other Mama and Mom that she couldn’t go to Tampere and that she couldn’t go that year again.
“Äiti… Mum… I’m sorry…”
Slumping back against the wall, placing both of her hands to her face, covering them from the hidden audience, before she broke down crying to no one. Stifling a choked-out cry.
“Fuck my life, dude…”