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It was a known fact to everyone close to them or otherwise that Woonhak’s favorite person was Kim Donghyun.
What most people did not know was Dongmin’s favorite happened to be Woonhak. Though that would not be so hard to guess, not when Woonhak was everyone’s favorite. Probably because he was the youngest in their group and besides he was bright and loud and impossible not to adore.
Dongmin told himself it was harmless. He might even chalk it up to the fact that yes, he was an emotional human being, who also sometimes felt things and these things sometimes really got to him. But in truth and every time Woonhak cackled at his dumb jokes, every time he leaned against Dongmin’s shoulder during long practices, every time those big eyes looked at him with complete trust and wonder when recording, something in him stirred wildly.
And Dongmin being Dongmin, the first thing he thought was that he could not let that show. Not when they were in the same group, not when their bond was one of the pillars keeping everything stable. So he did what he knew best and buried it deep down, tried his best to keep cool, act a little more aloof, just a little more blasé.
So yes, Woonhak was Dongmin’s favorite person. But it’s also so much more than that. So much more that Dongmin would rather just suffer on his own and to unfortunately have Donghyun himself be the keeper of his terrible secrets.
“Taesan hyung-ah.”
That made him freeze. Dongmin looked up from his laptop in the small recording room where he found Donghyun leaning against the doorframe, grinning.
“Stop calling me that,” Dongmin muttered.
“Why? You seemed to like it when we were filming,” Donghyun teased.
“It was for the show.”
“Sure it is.” Donghyun’s eyes sparkled knowingly.
“What are you doing here again?”
“Ah, right. Jaehyun hyung wanted me to tell you he’s working on the track you sent. Also… do you want to grab some food?”
Dongmin raised an eyebrow. That was interesting, Donghyun wasn’t one to ask anyone to grab a bite with him, especially not when they were working. “Why me? You’re usually hanging out with Sanghyuk hyung by now.”
“He’s still helping out Sungho hyung with choreography,” Donghyun supplied.
“Kim Woonhak then,” Dongmin suggested.
Donghyun tilted his head. “Really? You’d let me hang out with Woonhak?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dongmin clicked his tongue. “You’re free to hang out with whoever you like, you know.”
“Uh-huh. Sure.”
When he did not say more, Dongmin snapped his eyes back up only to look at Donghyun with annoyance. “What?”
“Hm? What?” Donghyun asked innocently.
Dongmin rolled his eyes and sighed. “Jesus, fine. Call Woonhak and let’s all go eat something.”
"I'll do that now!" Dongmin then watched Donghyun whip out his phone and it only took him less than a minute to call Woonhak and convince the younger one to come over Dongmin’s recording room.
Over the next five minutes, Woonhak came bounding with the biggest grin on his face. “Woah! What’s this, huh? Are we like having a maknae line hangout right now?”
Dongmin bit back the same growing smile he was feeling on his lips before turning to snipe at him. “That is not a thing.”
“It’s totally a thing. Woonhak, take a picture. Let’s send it to the Hyungs.” Donghyun giggled before crowding the two of them until each of his arms was wrapped around Dongmin and Woonhak.
Woonhak took out his phone and he snapped a picture.
“My eyes were closed, take it again,” Dongmin said.
“It’s fine. They’ll think it’s cute.” Donghyun looked over Woonhak’s shoulder before tapping Dongmin teasingly.
“Where are we eating again?” Woonhak asked before pocketing his phone, not after he sent their selca to the groupchat.
“Haven’t decided yet. And let’s not say the cafeteria.”
“I think I want something warm.”
Woonhak nodded, considering their ideas. “Let’s just walk around the street then. I’m sure we’ll find something.”
Dongmin then shut off his laptop and grabbed his stuff.
“Hey Dongmin, can I borrow this?” Donghyun grabbed something from the couch.
“What’s that?” Dongmin squinted.
“I think this is your hoodie.” Donghyun held it up. It was familiar and most likely was really his.
Dongmin waved a hand passively. “Yeah whatever, just give it back.”
That was when Woonhak bumped his shoulder with Dongmin’s. “How come you don’t let me borrow your stuff, Dongmin hyung?” He probably meant it as a joke.
“Yes, I do,” Dongmin replied, looking away.
“Nuh-uh, no you don’t.”
Because if I let you wear my clothes, I might not want them back, Dongmin wanted to say. Instead he just grunted and told the two of them to hurry up.
They ended up eating where they usually did. There was this family restaurant just across the company building and was always open during odd times, meant for people like them who often worked until dawn.
Dongmin tried not to stare as Woonhak laughed at something Donghyun said. He just got back to their table after grabbing some more side dishes at the self-serve station.
“Scoot over, Woonhak,” Dongmin demanded.
“Why do you have to sit beside me, Hyung?” Woonhak complained.
Dongmin frowned before looking at his friend. “Donghyun, he hates me.”
“Okay, now that’s just not true.”
Dongmin just about scoffed. “We know you always want to sit beside Donghyun. Let’s lay off the favoritism for a bit.”
“That’s seriously not true,” Woonhak pouted.
Donghyun tapped the table to get Woonhak’s attention. “You’re my favorite too, Woonhakkie. And don’t mind this idiot.”
Dongmin rolled his eyes. “Should I just leave?”
“Just sit down, Dongmin hyung,” Woonhak sighed before grabbing his arm and pulling him eagerly into the seat next to him.
They finished eating dinner without much scene and later that evening, Jaehyun all paired them up for some more work and brainstorming.
“Dongmin, you’re paired with Woonhak. Please go over what I wrote and feel free to have fun with your lyrics.”
“Got it. Thanks, Hyung!” Woonhak held two thumbs up enthusiastically while Dongmin just nodded.
“Can we use the big practice room?” Dongmin inquired before they all went their separate ways.
“Yep. I had it booked for us.” Jaehyun nodded.
“Come on, Woonhak.” Dongmin was already opening the door and barely even waited for Woonhak to get out before he began walking down the hall.
“Why the big studio, Hyung?”
“My recording room’s a mess.”
“Can’t we go to mine?”
Dongmin sighed and shook his head. “No.”
He can only be grateful that Woonhak did not push further but Dongmin could feel the younger one’s eyes on him the entire walk.
They settled in. Dongmin brought out his laptop and some writing materials meanwhile Woonhak set up the speakers even asking for permission if they could listen to music on low. For a while, they actually focused on work—trading lines, humming melodies, shoulders and knees occasionally brushing and bumping. Dongmin kept catching Woonhak glancing at him sideways if not observing him in the mirror with an unknown look but he made no comment about it.
“Dongmin hyung,” Woonhak finally said, his voice soft.
“Hmm?”
“Are you okay?”
Dongmin’s fingers tightened on the pen he was holding. “What?”
Woonhak let out a breath. “Come on, man. You know you can tell me anything right, Hyung? It’s just… Well…”
“What?” Dongmin urged.
“I don’t know,” Woonhak sighed. “You don’t seem to be doing well these days, I think.”
Dongmin’s eyes narrowed as he forced his voice to stay even. “You’re overthinking it.”
“Wow.” Woonhak gaped, staring at Dongmin like he just disappointed him. “My fault for caring then.”
Dongmin huffed before putting aside the notebook and pen. He pushed the sleeves of his jacket down before standing up to walk toward the door. “Let’s take a break. I’m getting some fresh air.” Just like that he walked out of the room, not even bothering to glance at Woonhak.
About fifteen minutes later, his phone buzzed.
Dongmin breathed out before answering the call. It was Donghyun. “Dude. What did you do and why is Woonhak crying? Jaehyun hyung’s threatening to give you a piece of his mind.”
That’s when Dongmin’s stomach dropped. Why would Woonhak be crying all of a sudden?
“Why is he crying? What the hell did I do?”
“Actually, what did you not do?”
“I’m going back there. Wait.”
Dongmin ran as fast as he could down back inside after finding himself by the fire exit. When he burst into the lounge, Jaehyun immediately stepped in front of him.
“Stop.”
“Hyung, listen. It’s not what you think. I promise. Just let me talk to Woonhak.”
Jaehyun nearly glared at him. “You made him cry. This isn’t the first time.”
Dongmin frowned at his words. “I—What?”
“I swear, Dongmin, hurt him and you’re gonna have to take it up with me.”
“I won’t. I swear. Please, Hyung.” Dongmin felt sick.
Jaehyun very slowly took a step back, his eyes not once leaving him as Dongmin entered.
His eyes immediately landed on Woonhak who was sitting on the couch, eyes red, as Donghyun drew soothing circles on his back. Donghyun saw him first and gave Dongmin a warning look.
“Dongmin’s here,” Donghyun whispered to Woonhak before nudging him.
“Kim Woonhak.” There was no answer.
“Dongmin, be nice,” Donghyun muttered right between a forced smile, eyes boring into him.
“Woonhak, come on.” Dongmin tried again, voice gentler this time. “Let’s go back. I want to talk with you alone.”
“It’s okay if you don’t want to, Woonhak-ah.” That was Jaehyun calling from outside. Dongmin suppressed his glare, he did not have any right to be mad at anyone but himself for causing whatever this was.
“Okay,” Woonhak murmured ever so quietly before he moved from Donghyun’s hold and gave the older one a reassuring look. He did not once attempt to make eye contact with Dongmin. Their walk back to the big practice room felt even longer than the first time.
Dongmin did not even have to force Woonhak to sit down as the younger one made way for the sofa in the corner of the room. Dongmin trailed before he sat down on the far end.
“Woonhak-ah,” Dongmin said softly. “Talk to me.”
Woonhak didn’t speak. He didn’t even lift his head.
The silence stretched on. Dongmin’s stomach twisted into something sharper. He hated how small Woonhak looked, hated even more that he was the reason for it.
“I’m sorry,” Dongmin started, voice low and careful. “I wasn’t in a good mood earlier. Practice and everything else has been kicking my ass and I took it out on you. That was wrong of me and you didn’t deserve that. Hyung’s been off lately, I know, but it’s not because of you. You’ve done nothing wrong. I should’ve done better. I’m really sorry for making you feel that way especially now.”
He only saw Woonhak’s shoulders trembling faintly.
Dongmin’s throat tightened. He kept going, desperate. “Whatever I said a while ago… I didn’t mean it the way it sounded. You’re important to Hyung. More than you probably realize, Woonhak-ah. I’ve just been trying so hard to keep things normal because—
He finally looked over.
Woonhak was crying.
Silent tears streamed steadily down his cheeks but his eyes, for all its redness and overwhelming emotions, never left Dongmin’s face.
Dongmin’s heart just about dropped. All his words had vanished, the explanation he was still carefully constructing in his head erased.
“Woonhak…?” He whispered, voice cracking.
Woonhak finally opened his mouth and barely above a whisper he said, “I thought you found out.”
“Found out what?”
Woonhak swallowed hard, more tears slipping free. “That I like you. Not just as a Hyung or a member. I like you. For a long time now.” His breath hitched painfully. “I thought you noticed how I’ve been acting and got distant because you were uncomfortable. That you didn’t know how to tell me without ruining the group.” Woonhak was sobbing now.
Dongmin stared at him, completely and utterly stunned. He liked him? His mind reeled. All the distance he had forced thinking he was protecting them, protecting Woonhak, yet Woonhak had been hurting all this time because he assumed Dongmin found out about this. The pieces slammed into place: Jaehyun’s protectiveness, Donghyun’s weird comments. They hadn’t been mad at him for being rude.
They had been shielding Woonhak all this time.
Because.. Because Woonhak liked him. He felt the same way.
“You…” Dongmin’s voice failed him for a moment. He stood up without thinking, pacing the room as his thoughts spiraled. This wasn’t supposed to be possible. He never let himself imagine this, not ever. And all this time… all this time, Woonhak felt the same?
He stopped pacing and turned back to Woonhak who was still watching him with those tear-filled eyes, waiting.
Dongmin exhaled the longest and probably the shakiest sigh of his life. He ran both hands through his hair, trying to ground himself.
He walked back and kneeled right in front of Woonhak, close enough that his hands rested on his lap. “Woonhak-ah,” Dongmin said gently, voice thick. “Look at me, look at Hyung.”
Woonhak did.
“Not once did I think you might feel the same… I was pulling away because I was terrified,” Dongmin confessed. “I like you too. I’ve liked you for so long I was convinced that was all I could have. I was terrified that if I let myself feel everything, it would ruin me. It would hurt you more. This wasn’t something I allowed myself to think about, that you might like me too in that way.”
Woonhak’s breath caught. Fresh tears fell but this time a tiny, disbelieving smile broke through.
A relieved laugh then escaped Dongmin before he dropped his head fully into Woonhak’s lap. It wasn’t long before hands soothed his hair, carding it gently.
“So we’ve both been idiots…” Woonhak whispered after a while, letting out a watery chuckle.
Dongmin slowly raised his head before reaching out a hand and cupped one of Woonhak’s cheeks, brushing a tear away with his thumb.
“You really freaked Hyung out, you know that?” Dongmin clicked his tongue, trying to lighten the mood.
“Sorry,” Woonhak mumbled, leaning further into Dongmin’s touch.
He eventually pulled Woonhak into a complete embrace. He melted against Dongmin, arms wrapping tight around his waist.
The company building was quiet when they left the practice room. The hallways were dimly lit, the usual bustle long gone. Dongmin walked beside Woonhak, their shoulders brushing with every step.
Woonhak’s hand brushed against his. Dongmin hesitated for half a second then laced their fingers together. He saw Woonhak look down from the side before he squeezed their hands.
“You feel better now?” Dongmin asked softly, glancing over.
“Yeah.” Woonhak smiled, laughing softly.
After their little, emotional reconciliation Woonhak was inconsolable and only because he had been known to have a hard time putting a stop to his tears whenever he cried. It took a while but Dongmin sat with him through it, eventually passing Woonhak a bottle of water and rubbing his back soothingly.
“Are we ready to go home then?” Dongmin asked.
Woonhak nodded, leaning his head against Dongmin’s shoulder for a brief second.
As they started walking down the quiet street, hands still intertwined, Dongmin allowed himself one last quiet thought: finally.