Chapter Text
Megan has built a good life in Los Angeles. She has a job that she loves, friends that she loves, and she lives in a beach house with her dog. It’s more than good, really--it’s great. It has been 5 years since she moved here with her cousin, Sophia, 5 years since she left Atlanta and never looked back. She believes that’s how she was able to build a life out here from scratch, by never looking back. There is a saying that goes, “Leave the past where it belongs: behind you”. And now, she’s picking up her past from the airport. Her pretty, curly haired past.
Her hands are trembling as she grips the steering wheel. Beads of sweat rolls from her forehead and from her back and she feels like her body is on fire. She feels her heart beating so hard, it feels like her chest is gonna rip open and she thinks, this is it. This is how I’m gonna die. A heart attack in the middle of a traffic. 23 years has been enough it seems. If it’s her time, then it’s her time, let the angels take her away. Please take her away from this. This is by far the best excuse she could come up with, so if it means Sophia has to find another maid of honor, then so be it. This is her doing after all...
“I just found the perfect wedding planner,” Sophia had said to her back then with a suspicious gleam in her eyes, “I think you know her, actually”
“Oh yeah? What’s her name?” She had asked, her poor oblivious soul not knowing what’s about to hit her.
“Daniela Avanzini, ring a bell?”
She choked on her breath. Oh, it had rang a bell alright. A goddamn bourdon bell. It rang and it might as well had deafen her. But Sophia already knows this, she knows their history. Some parts of it at least, but still, she was there every time her heart spilled from the cracks. So she must be joking right? (She wasn’t)
“You’re kidding, right?” Megan laughed nervously. “Please tell me you’re kidding”
Sophia shook her head. And fuck, she really did not look like she was joking. “I’m serious, Megs. I already texted her and she said her schedule is free this month. She’s set out to fly here next week”
“I’m sorry, she’s what!?” She had felt like air was knocked out of her lungs that time. This can’t be happening, she had pleaded in her mind. “Sophia, no. There’s already a lot of wedding planners here in LA, you could’ve picked anyone!” This can’t be happening. “Literally anyone but her!” This cannot be happening.
This is happening, Megan dreadfully thinks as the cars upfront finally starts moving. She hasn’t died and this is really happening. Her last resort would be crashing the car but the problem however, is that it’s her car she’s using--her beloved car that she bought with her own hard-earned money. She won’t let anything harm her baby. If it was Sophia’s car though…that would be a different story. A story that will probably end in a ditch.
It wasn’t always like this though; Megan usually didn’t prefer dying over the simple act of seeing Daniela. Back then, she actually sought Dani like she was her lifeline. There was once upon a magical time where they couldn’t be separated from each other, their parents had to drag the other home sulking until they finally agreed to sleepovers. Though, there wasn’t really any sleep, it was more on movies, blanket forts, and whispering pinky promises in the dark. Then came high school and parties that Dani was never allowed to go to. But, then again, they were inseparable so, Megan picked her up in her rattly squeaky bike every time and she would jump from her window, praying it wouldn’t break any of her bones. They would ride into the night sometimes ending up at the party, sometimes they’d bail on it and go to the park, or at Megan’s house, or even just at the side of the street sitting on a curb. Anything was as fun as parties when they were together anyways.
Growing up, Megan had Daniela and it didn’t really matter what she didn’t have, all that mattered was her. Didn’t matter that her home life was a wreck, didn’t matter that some kids picked on her, and it surely didn’t matter that her Dad left them. Her bestfriend was still there and that had been enough. And maybe that was the problem. Megan needed her too much. Had asked for too much and that’s how the cracks started. She was too much and that’s what drove people away, drove her Dad away. And so before Daniela could even ran away, she grabbed at the chance to be the one to run this time. It’s what she would have wanted anyway with how much she distanced herself for those last few days. Leave before you get left, and so Megan left when Sophia offered to go with her to California. Daniela hadn’t even been there to say goodbye. No message, no phone call, no anything. It had hurt so much it felt like her heart was carrying this constant crushing weight all the time.
She still doesn’t know how she feels about it. She’s angry with herself, yes, but should she be angry with Daniela too? With all the heartbreak and longing she caused, should she greet Daniela at the airport with a scowl on her face?
Megan tries to feel it, that bubbling anger that supposed to be hiding deep within, but she can’t find it in her. Sadness, guilt, and dread is what stirs in her instead. She has let go of her a long time ago and had made peace of never seeing her again. It would have been what’s best for the both of them. Daniela is supposed to be free from her—the burden that she is, but instead she has to spend 3 weeks living with Megan in the same beach house.
Finally parking her car, Megan wonders how Daniela would feel seeing her again. Would she be happy? Sad? Angry? Would she be the one with a scowl on her face? Would she walk through the airport see Megan’s face then turn back around and book the next flight back? She sighs. She can’t really blame her if she would.
She’s now standing at the arrival area, holding up a sign with Daniela Avanzini written in bold letters, along with the bustling crowd who are also waiting for the people on the plane that’s just landed. Some of the people around her are buzzing with excitement, waiting for their loved one maybe, she assumes. Can’t really say the same thing to her, although, she did love Daniela, she was in love with her and that’s what caused it all to fall apart. But, now? She really can’t say, can’t know for sure until she sees her striding from the gates, she can’t know for certain until she’s looking back once again into hazel ey—Nope. No, actually, hold that thought. She doesn’t want to know, she doesn’t want to go back. She can’t. This is different, she has changed, both of them a different person than what was 5 years ago, and that applies to whatever she had fel-
Daniela.
Dani is here.
Megan’s heart is leaping and slamming back down. The edges of the sign is crumpled under the tight grip of her hand. She wants to bolt. She want to throw up. She wants to faint. But she doesn’t do any of those, she’s still standing upright, suspended. Suspended by the sight of Daniela with her curls falling perfectly framing her face, the rest of her hair in a bun. She has her suitcase and a backpack hanging on one of her shoulders. She still hasn’t seen her, she’s still unaware that Megan is here and currently doing her fucking breathing exercises.
She doesn’t look any different from the last time she saw her, but in the way she carries herself, there’s now a sense of maturity that they could only ever imitate poorly when they were still teenagers.
Daniela’s eyes finally settles in her direction, widening a fraction and she swears she felt her heart stopped beating for a second. She stops too for a moment, seemingly taking in the sight of Megan after 5 whole years of not seeing each other. Her eyes sweeps over her face until they fully land on hers. She finally walks up to her, with every step there’s a heavy thud in Megan’s chest.
Dani is here. In front of her, face to face. She’s real and she can see the freckles on her face.
They haven’t uttered a word yet—just uselessly staring at one another. Eyes silently speaking words that they’re too scared to say with their mouth. That’s how it has always been with them. Megan feels her mouth dry as it opens and closes. She tries, but no sound ever comes out.
“I uh..umm,” Daniela tries too. And gosh, her voice. Megan hasn’t heard that for such a long long time and for all the things she’s feeling now, it certainly feels good to hear her voice again. Daniela takes a deep breath and tries again. “Hey, Megs”
Megs. Megan wants to cry. Should she hug her? Pat her on the head? Definitely not. Shake her hands? She should probably say something first.
“Hi, Dani,” her mouth twitches into a smile and Dani returns it, oh so softly. And gosh, that smile. No, she thinks. Can’t be thinking like that. She focuses on the bag on Dani’s shoulder instead. “Here, let me carry that,” she says, tucking the sign under her arm and offering a hand.
“Oh. No, that’s okay,” Dani replies, waving a hand.
“Come on, your shoulders probably hurt by now.” She could see it by how she’s slouching and puffing.
“It’s really ok-”
Dani is still stubborn, she finds, so she pries the bag herself off of Dani’s shoulders. She leaned close to take the bag off and—wow, she did not think this through. She’s too close for her hearts sake and she feels dizzy when Dani’s still looking at her, also too close. She hurriedly takes a step back and clears her throat.
“Thank you,” Dani murmurs.
Megan smiles as she adjusts the backpack to her shoulders. They fall to that silence again where they just stand and stare at each other. Taking it all again and memorizing as if this moment could evaporate at any second.
“Sorry.” Someone bumps into Megan pulling them out of their haze.
“We uh..,” Megan clears her throat again. “We should get going”
***
The drive is painfully quiet. What do you expect from ex-bestfriends who haven’t seen each other for years? She could feel Daniela looking at her though, from the passenger seat with a hand propped up to her chin. She really didn’t take her eyes off from Megan after spotting her from the airport and it makes Megan wonder what’s been circling around in her mind. Is it because of her pink bangs?
“Is this your car?” Dani finally breaks the silence, although, there’s a hint of hesitance in her voice as if she’s been contemplating whether she should speak or not.
“Uh yeah, it is”
“It’s very…you.” There’s a certain tone to her voice that makes Megan face her. How so? She wants to ask but she scrapes it for something lighter.
“I guess so. That rattly bike just isn’t cut out for me here"
Dani laughs and she can’t help the smile forming on her face. Something in the air loosens and it’s like she’s 14 again back in Dani’s room. God, I missed her, Megan finally admits to herself. How could she have gone for years without hearing that laugh? Maybe this situation won’t be as bad as she thought it would be. Maybe if she doesn’t mess it up this time, she could have her bestfriend back.
“So, um how you’ve been?” Megan starts, feeling a little more confident.
“I’m…” Dani stills and seems to really think about her answer. “I’m fine—good. As you know, I took up mom’s business, wedding planning and all so I still live in Roswell. But, I got my own place, had it for a long time now actually.”
“And how’s Mr. and Mrs. Avanzini?”
“Oh you know, still uptight, still a nagging pain in the ass,” Dani saltily answers and Megan can’t help but let out an amused chortle.
“Really? More than they were before?” Those two weren’t really a fan of her once high school came around. Too afraid she’ll infect their daughter with her homosexual tendencies perhaps. But Dani rarely complained about them then and certainly did not call them a “nagging pain in the ass” just like how she said earlier.
“Pfft. You have no idea.”
The rest of the drive fell into an easy rhythm. They spent half of it egging Daniela’s parents and the other talking about the present and what’s new. They’re careful not to venture too much into the past, to that night. It makes Megan hope again that maybe she could do this just fine. She could definitely do this for three weeks.
They arrived shortly after and are now standing at the back of her car, pulling out her suitcase. By the time she gets it out, she turns to Dani to find her fiddling with her hands.
You okay? Megan wanted to ask but Dani was already opening her mouth.
“Is it okay if I—if we could um…if we could you know,” she makes a gesture with her hand that Megan fails to recognize. ‘If we could..” Dani tries again but Megan already sees that the resolve in her eyes is gone. She hears an exasperated sigh first before two arms are wrapped around her neck
Dani has pulled her into a hug. It takes a second before her own arms wrap around her waist, pulling her closer. She nuzzles her cheeks to the side of Dani’s head and closes her eyes when the familiar scent of vanilla fills her nose. She shivers when she feels Dani’s breath hot on her neck. There goes my hope, Megan realizes, because there’s no way she could survive these three weeks without her heart being bruised and battered. Not when her breath still hitches at the sight of two warm hazels. Not when she’s still helplessly and undeniably in love with Dani.