Chapter Text
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In the midst of a brutal winter in the year 1815, two brothers travel on horseback through the depths of a snowy forest.
Pulling at the reins to stop their horse, the older of the two pushes down the hood of his cloak, looking around at the frozen woodland surrounding them. "I think we've lost our way." He says, worry clear in his tone.
"We've not lost anything, Liu." The younger speaks calmly, hugging closer to his brother for warmth. "It's lost us."
When Liu tries to keep going, the horse refuses to move. "Come on, girl. Move." He attempts to coax the animal into continuing, but it refuses. Eventually, he just sighs. "Okay, fine. Come on, Jeff. I suppose we're all walking for a while." He reaches back to help his brother down from the horse before climbing off himself.
So, they lead the horse by the reins and trudge through the snow.
As he walks, Jeff peers from under his hood at their surroundings, feeling as though he's being watched. He pauses, macabre images all of a sudden running through his mind. Flashes of gruesome scenes -- of blood and death. He shakes it off and keeps moving.
When their horse again stops, refusing to even be led forwards, Liu groans. He pulls at the reins, but it won't comply, and starts to fuss as if frightened. "What's wrong with you, girl?" He pets the animal, trying to calm it down, but it only gets more and more unsettled.
Jeff pushes down his hood, revealing long, messy locks of light brown hair that catch in the icy breeze as he looks around at the trees warily, though not seeing anything. More images flash in his vision; gore and rot. Then his attention is drawn to where Liu is struggling with an increasingly spooked horse. "Woah, woah, it's okay." He joins his brother in attempting to settle the animal.
Only becoming more distressed, the horse rears with a scream. Then it's running. It speeds away from them and off through the trees.
"No, no, no, come back!" The two take off after the horse, sprinting as fast as they can through the deep snow, their long dark cloaks dragging behind them.
They give chase for a while, but it's hopeless. They slow. Then stop, panting and looking around helplessly, realising that they've lost the horse.
Suddenly, Liu screams and collapses to the ground.
"Liu!" Jeff drops to his knees in the snow beside his brother, who's leg has been caught in a bear trap. He takes hold of the metal jaws and attempts to pry them open. Liu pulls at the trap too, grunting in pain as the two attempt to free him from it.
In the panic, neither notice the person approaching them until they're standing only a few feet away. Liu sees her first, placing a hand on his brother's shoulder and staring behind him to alert him to the stranger's presence.
The woman is tall, pale, and has long, dark hair. She's dressed in leather and furs, strapped with various blades, and carries a bow and arrow on her back. She stands as still as the frozen trees around her, her eyes fixed on the two boys.
Getting to his feet, Jeff pulls out a dagger. "You just stay back! You hear me?!" He stands in front of his brother, holding his weapon threateningly.
"Jeff, stop it!" Liu, helplessly stuck, pulls at Jeff's cloak in an effort to control him. "We don't want any trouble, okay?" He calls towards the woman.
Without a word, the woman slowly steps towards them, her boots hardly making sound as they sink into the snow. She moves almost silently, evidently a fairly skilled hunter.
"I told you to stay back!" Jeff steps forwards, ignoring his brother yelling for him to stop and moving to attack the woman. He lunges at her with his dagger, only for his wrist to be caught in her hand and twisted, forcing him to drop the blade. Then, before he knows what's going on, he's been shoved to the ground, face down in the snow with the woman restraining his arms behind his back.
"Hey!" Liu shouts, panicked, trying to get over to Jeff despite being stuck with his leg clamped brutally in the metal teeth of a bear trap. "Leave him alone!"
The huntress pulls rope from a loop on her belt and uses it to tie Jeff's hands behind his back. While she does, Liu frantically tries to wrench the trap on his leg open.
"Please don't hurt my brother!" Liu begs, helpless, unable to free himself.
His arms tied behind his back, Jeff struggles fruitlessly. The woman stands, leaving one boy restrained and squirming angrily in the snow as she walks over to the other, who watches with fearful eyes as she approaches.
"You stay away from him, you bitch!" Jeff yells, watching with fear and trying desperately to do something, though finding himself unable to.
Liu is silent as the woman crouches down, meeting his eyes for a moment, before looking to where his leg is caught bloodily in the trap. She takes hold of the metal jaws and pulls them open, allowing Liu to pull his leg out before releasing them to snap shut again.
Liu instantly shuffles backwards away from the stranger. He eyes her cautiously for a moment, before crawling through the snow over to his brother. He grabs Jeff's dagger from the ground and uses it to cut his arms free.
The two get to their feet, Jeff needing to help Liu up due to his injured leg, and stare at the woman, who starts to walk off. She turns back to them briefly. "Come this way." Then she's heading away through the trees.
The brothers look at each other for a moment. Then, from somewhere out in the woods, the sound of a wolf howling carries on the wind. Hurriedly, they move to follow the woman.
They're led to the large wooden walls of a fort. The entrance doors are surrounded in sharpened wooden spikes, some of which are coated in what looks like blood. Nailed all over the doors are crosses. Crosses also hang from some of the wooden spikes.
The huntress bangs loudly on the large doors with a fist, and after a few moments they open. The man who opens the doors glances at Jeff and Liu briefly, before glaring at the huntress and stepping back, allowing her to enter, the two boys following behind.
A few men with rifles eye them with suspicion as they walk into the settlement, Liu limping on his injured leg and leaning on his younger brother for support. They continue to follow the huntress, passing what seems to be an abnormally large graveyard for a settlement of this size. A man stands in the graveyard – red hair, dressed in some form of religious attire and holding a bible, looking to be a priest. He ceases the prayer he was saying and watches the two as they pass.
Entering the main courtyard area, the few people around stop what they're doing and to look at Jeff and Liu. None of them seem very pleased to see new faces, all either glaring at them or appearing afraid.
"Well," Jeff mumbles to his brother, looking around at all of the entirely unfriendly reactions to their presence, "welcome to civilization."
"Jane!" A man in a soldier's uniform stomps angrily towards the huntress. "What do you think you're doing bringing strangers into our walls?" He demands, spitting aggressive words into her face, motioning with one hand towards where Jeff and Liu stand. She shows no reaction to the anger, just standing silent and stoic as she's yelled at. "You've put us all in danger, you idiotic wench!"
"It's nearly nightfall. We were looking for shelter." Liu speaks up, causing the soldier to turn his attention to him. He barges past the huntress aggressively and walks over to the two boys, glaring at Liu.
"You'd best not speak out of turn, boy." The words are as threatening as his glare.
"Sargent Major." Another man speaks sternly, walking over. "Stand down."
The soldier reluctantly backs off. "Mr Green." He greets the other, a large man wearing formal looking clothing, with no attempt to hide his frustration.
"That one's hurt." Someone says suddenly, pointing to Liu. A few of the men with rifles have followed them over, as well as the red-haired priest. Everyone is staring at the teenagers as though they pose a threat.
"Show me." The large man, apparently the one in charge, demands, looking at Liu expectantly.
When Liu shows his injured leg, which is bloody and bleeding through his clothing, there's frightened gasps and murmuring from around them.
The soldier takes a step back, staring at Liu's leg. "He's been bit."
"How'd you come by that wound?" The man in charge addresses Liu.
"In the woods." Liu speaks. "I stepped in a trap. The huntress helped us."
"We were accompanying our father, traveling west." Jeff explains, clinging to his older brother's side. "Only, our boat was overturned. We washed up on shore, but our-…" He holds himself even closer to Liu, frowning. "Our parents were drowned..."
The priest steps up to the leader's side, speaking to him whilst keeping his eyes on the two boys, bible still clutched in his hands. "Cast them out, Troy. Cast them out. You put us all in grave peril if you give them refuge."
The man seems to consider the priest's words for a moment before speaking. "The wound will be seen to." He motions for Jeff and Liu to follow him before turning and walking off.
Being glared at by everyone present, the brothers shuffle away to follow.
As he's helped to walk by his younger sibling, Liu leans down to mutter to him so no one else can hear. "Our parents drowned now, did they?"
"Sure." Jeff answers quietly, grinning. "But they didn't suffer. It was really quite peaceful." He giggles to himself. Liu grimaces.
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After Liu is first inspected and then treated by a physician, the man in charge introduces himself as Chief Factor Troy Green of this fort, and welcomes them as guests.
They're invited to dinner. They learn more about some of the other people around here, none of whom seem to be very fond of their being allowed to stay, though some definitely less so than others. The huntress, Jane, seems to be the only woman around, as well as not very liked by anyone. She's not hostile to Jeff and Liu, at least not more so than she is to everyone else. The soldier who had shouted at her previously, Sargent Major Daviss, definitely doesn't become any more likable, starting an altercation with her over dinner that almost turns violent. Though, said altercation was a stroke of luck for Jeff and Liu, since Liu had been struggling to keep Jeff from running his mouth, and he would have most likely ended up angering the priest, Reverend Warren, if the distraction hadn't occurred.
Dinner is interrupted by the ringing of alarm bells outside, along with other distant, odd noises.
The boys walk down a corridor towards a room they've been given to stay in. Hearing someone behind then, they turn, finding Reverend Warren standing ominously behind them, apparently having followed them. They look at him briefly before slowly turning to continue walking.
"Good Christians need fear nothing." The priest says, causing the two to turn back to him.
"We're not afraid." Jeff responds, returning the glare the man is giving them.
"Perhaps you should be." The priest speaks sternly, his gaze intense. "Months this fort has been in the devil's grip, and yet you two mere boys walk right through our door."
The distant sounds from outside the walls are heard again, louder now. It sounds like howling.
"What is that?" Liu asks.
"Demons." Reverend Warren says, taking a step closer. "The devil's wickedness." He walks towards them. "This place is to be drowned like a new born deformity. To be cut out like a bleeding cancer." His voice grows louder, now stepping close to them, anger and accusation in his voice and on his face. "To be cast into hell like a filthy sinner." By the last two words, he's almost shouting.
Liu pulls Jeff quickly into their room and closes the door.
"Don't forget to say your prayers, boys." The Priest says from outside, before walking away.
"… These people are fucked." Jeff states, he and Liu both somewhat rattled. They both take a breath, and Liu locks the door.
"There's not many people here, for a somewhere this size." Liu says as the two are stripping from their warm layers and making themselves comfortable. "So many graves in the graveyard…" Sitting on the bed, he looks up, to the large portrait hanging on the wall. It shows a family, a man, woman, and the little girl whose room this used to be. "There's been lots of tragedy here." He stares with sad eyes at the girl in the painting. Such a young child, with long blond hair, bright blue eyes, and pretty smile. "Maybe that's why people seem so afraid."
"Perhaps." Jeff also observes the painting, though only for a moment. Then he simply shrugs before falling back into the comfortable bed with a content sigh.
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That night, Jeff dreams of death. Blurry visions of blood, screaming, and tearing flesh. Waking up suddenly, he sits up in bed. He glances down to his brother, who is asleep peacefully next to him, before climbing out of bed.
Jeff takes a candle from the bedside and leaves the room. He means to find some water, but something distracts him. A faint sound emanates from down a long, dark corridor. Jeff stops, staring into the darkness the sound comes from.
"Hello?" He calls into the dark. There's no response. He walks off down the corridor, following the noise.
As he gets closer, the sound becomes clearer. It sounds like someone's crying. A child. It's the sound of a sobbing child. "Hello?" Jeff called again, stopping in front of where the noises are coming from. The old wooden door is latched shut from the outside, and the crying is coming from within.
Jeff unlatches the door and pushes it open. He steps inside, the candle in his hand illuminating the small, dingey room. There's no furniture, just a dark, dirty little room. And a child, sitting in and facing the corner.
The little girl is hunched over, rocking back and forth and hugging her knees as she sobs to herself. Her skin is ghostly white; she has long, black hair which is dirty and hangs messily around her; and her clothing is filthy, even bloody in places.
"Hey. Come here, it's okay." Jeff speaks gently, slowly approaching the girl. "Who locked you in here?" He reaches for her.
In a sudden flash of movement, the girl turns around and lunges at Jeff with an animalistic snarl.
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"Liu. Liu, wake up." Jeff shakes Liu awake urgently. "We need to leave this place."
Liu opens his eyes to see his younger brother. The loose white shirt that hangs from him stained crimson with blood.
"Oh god. Jeff, what have you done?"
"What have I done?" Jeff scoffs. "Something bit me!"
"Something bit you?" Liu sits up quickly, looking at Jeff with concern.
"I thought it was a girl." Jeff is hurriedly collecting their things and shoving them into a bag. "But it was… some kind of animal. I don't know. Whatever it was, it's loose in the house. We need to get out of here."
"Come here. Let me see." Liu grabs Jeff, holding him still and trying to get a good look at the wound on his shoulder where the blood is coming from. It's a gruesome bite torn deep into his flesh, looking to be from a very large animal.
"I'm fine." Jeff bats his concerned brother away. "We just need to leave."
"Where are we going to go?"
"Same place we always go. Away."
The two dress and make their way outside. They walk past the courtyard and sneak quietly through the graves towards the large doors of the wall. When they hear the guard on watch, they duck down out of sight and wait for him to wander far enough away. Then they approach the doors.
They've pushed up and removed the large wooden beam securing the doors closed and are just about to pull them open, when Liu turns to Jeff and his eyes open wide in shock, seeing the man who's appeared behind him. Jeff turns, finding himself face to face with Sargent Major Daviss, who punches him in the face before he can even react. Liu instantly moves to attack the man, but is easily countered and thrown harshly into the wall behind him.
The blow to the face sends Jeff to the ground, where he groans before getting quickly back to his feet. The soldier puts down his rifle before lunging for Jeff, again hitting him in the face and sending him to the ground.
"Get up." The man sneers, tone making it clear that he's finding enjoyment in this. "So I can hit you again."
Jeff spits blood onto the ground. Then pushes himself back to his feet with a groan. He faces the soldier, and pulls out a dagger. He holds the blade in front of him, staring the man down threateningly.
"Oh, you want to do this?" The soldier laughs. "Fine." He pulls a sword from his belt.
Not backing down, Jeff holds a death glare on the man, dagger held tight in his hand.
"Come on." Daviss laughs again, making a joke of it as he false-swings his blade at Jeff just to see him flinch. Then, with the sudden sound of a gun cocking behind him, his bravado drops.
"Drop it." Liu says, holding the soldier's own gun on him. He moves to be stood next to his brother, never moving the rifle from pointing right at Daviss's head, who does what the boy says and drops his weapon.
"Move back." Liu commands. Beside him, Jeff wears a smug grin, his mouth still bloodied from being hit.
"Do you even know how to use one of those, boy?" Daviss questions, equal parts condescension and seething anger.
Liu narrows his eyes, finger on the trigger of the weapon. "Try me."
All of a sudden, the loud sound of growling draws all of their attention to the large doors beside them, which start to push open, whatever is behind them snarling and growling viciously. Daviss moves quickly to hold the doors closed. "Hold it! Hold it!" He yells, frantic.
Jeff and Liu stare, shocked and confused for a moment, before dropping their weapons and helping the man to hold the doors closed.
The three struggle to keep the wooden doors from opening, the snarling animals on the other side much stronger. The soldier yells and screams for help, calling for the guards and other men. "Get down here! Now! They're on top of us! Help me!"
Alarm bells ring, and men come running.
Just as Daviss is shoved violently by the doors almost being pushed open and falls to the ground, other men reach them and just about manage to keep them closed. In the brief moments there's a gap, however, one of the men is pulled through. There's screaming, panic, yelling, and blood. Daviss is back on his feet and tries to pull the man back, but he's violently yanked through the doors and is gone. As the man's death screams mix with the horrendous noise of the animal grunts and snarls on the other side of the walls, the men attempt to secure the beam back in place and the door closed.
Jeff and Liu back away from the door, and run. They see more men rushing towards the scene, and turn off to avoid them. They head down a quiet alley between two buildings, not sure what's happening or where to go.
Both boys are startled when Reverend Warren appears behind them, holding a rifle. "Shh." The priest shushes them, a serious expression on his face. "There's one inside." He points to a portion of the wall that's been ripped open, leaving a big hole. "This way." He motions for them to follow and leads them assumably towards safety. Then the priest suddenly stops, holding the gun in his hands up and pointing it in front of him, before backing up. He turns around to face the two teenagers. "Go, quickly." He commands, pointing them towards the door of the building behind them. He ushers them inside the building and closes the door behind them, himself staying outside.
Liu spins back around, trying the handle of the door that's been closed on them. It's locked. From outside, Reverend Warren speaks the Latin words of a prayer. He finishes by meeting Jeff's eyes through the slats of the wood and speaking cold words. "Burn in hell." The priest then walks away.
Hearing movement in the darkness, the two boys turn, unable to see anything but definitely hearing something.
"It's in here with us." Jeff mumbles, eyes darting around fearfully in the dark.
"Stay quiet." Liu whispers. He takes his younger brother by the wrist and moves him behind himself. Breathing heavily, the two boys freeze and attempt to be as silent as possible, hearing movement come from ahead of them. Then, a growl. "Run." Liu breathes, the two turning quickly and fleeing.
They run to the back of the small house and up the stairs, a terrifying roar coming from behind as the animal chases them. They run through the loft and into a small room at the other end, where they slam the door closed behind them in the animal's face. They latch the door closed and hold it, but the thing on the other side is strong and it's not long before the wood is splintering inwards, the muzzle of a horrifying beast pushing through a hole, a huge set of teeth on display and awful growls and snarls leaving it as it breaks through the door.
The creature gets its whole head through the broken door. It looks almost like a wolf, but bigger; jet black, shaggy fur hanging from pale, white skin; a ridiculous amount of large, sharp teeth, jutting from the bloody gash of torn flesh that's far wider than any actual canine's mouth would be.
The wolf-like monster pushes its way further into the room with a blood-thirsty roar. Both boys scream in terror, grabbing at anything they can in the room to hit the beast with.
At the last possible second, right before the thing was about to get to them, an arrow suddenly pierces through its scull from the back, sticking out of one of its eyes. It slumps over, dead.
Panting, Liu pulls his eyes from the dead monster, leaning to look through the hole in the door to see who saved them. He locks eyes with Jane, who lowers her bow.
Dark has given way to early morning sun as the brothers step out of the house they'd been left in to die. Jeff storms angrily ahead, walking with purpose. He quickly spots who he's looking for, and draws his dagger as he moves towards Reverend Warren, violence in his eyes.
"You bastard!" Jeff spits angrily as he lunges for the priest, only stopped from attacking him at the last second by Liu, who just about manages to hold the furious boy back.
"Jeff. Stop." Liu attempts to calm his brother down, despite he himself also quite wanting to harm the man. He's actually fairly tempted to allow Jeff to do what he wants, just, not right this second. "Not now, okay?" He manages to wrestle the blade from Jeff's hand, getting in front of him. "Let's just get back to our room. It's not safe out here." He looks around, seeing men running in every direction, yelling panicked words to each other. The howling and other horrible noises come from just outside the walls in all directions.
Reverend Warren turns and walks away, and Jeff groans angrily. But eventually he listens to his brother and calms down. The two turn to leave, finding Jane standing there watching them.
"Thank you." Liu says to her. "For saving us."
Jane doesn't respond. She looks from Liu to Jeff, glaring at the younger for a long moment. Then she just walks away.
"I don't think that woman likes me all that much." Jeff mutters, watching the huntress walk off.
"Jeff…" Liu whispers, staring at his brother with a fearful expression. Jeff's nose is bleeding. "Come on." Liu mumbles, taking Jeff by the arm. "Let's get you back up to the room, okay?"
In their room, Liu sits Jeff down on the bed and puts the back of a hand to his forehead. "You're burning up." He states, worried. He undoes the buttons on Jeff's cloak and pulls it off of him. Then grabs a rag and tries to wipe at the blood running down his face.
"I'm fine." Jeff insists, pulling away from Liu's attempts to wipe the blood from him. Though, he pulls his cloak the rest of the way off of him and starts to undo his overshirt, definitely feeling as though he's burning up.
Outside, the sound of shouting and gunshots is still heard.
"What do you think those things are, Jeff?" Liu asks, helping Jeff to remove layers of clothing. "Animals?"
"That was no animal." Jeff shrugs off the clothing, revealing the white garment underneath which is stained red with his blood.
Liu pulls the loose collar of the white shirt down, examining the wound on Jeff's shoulder with concern. "Do you think they really could be-"
"What, demons come for us sinners?" Jeff bats Liu away from his injured shoulder. He thinks for a moment, before shrugging. "Well, who knows." He turns to his brother, slowly leaning in close. His blood covered lips only inches from Liu's, he breathes a slight chuckle, before whispering softly. "We certainly are sinners, aren't we…"
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Jeff again dreams of violence and death. This time, far more vividly.
He can feel the blood on his skin; feel the heat of the person he's tearing apart as he sinks his fingers into their chest, tearing them open with his bare hands; taste their flesh as he rips out their throat with his teeth.
And, it feels good. It tastes good. The experience is utterly euphoric.
Until he's gazing at the bloodied, dead face of the person beneath him.
"Liu!?" Jeff shrieks, jolting awake suddenly and looking around in a panic for his brother, who is right next to him and wakes up with a start.
"Jeff? What's wr-" Upon seeing Jeff, Liu bolts upright in bed, eyes wide with fear as he leans over him. Jeff and the bed beneath them are drenched in blood, pouring from the bite on his shoulder. "We need to see the doctor." Liu states, concern and fear in his trembling voice as he looks over the state of his younger brother, who's not only covered in blood, but has lost so much colour from his skin that it appears almost white as snow.
After helping a weak and somewhat dazed Jeff to dress, Liu guides him out of their room and through the house. The two step outside, met with a fire burning in the centre of the courtyard. Some men are dragging the body of the beast that attacked them towards the fire. They're being overseen by Daviss, who turns to watch the boys with a glare as they pass.
As they draw closer to the physician's office, raised voices can be heard. By the time they push through the doors, the commotion has progressed to shouting.
"I said stay the hell away from me!" A man yells, holding a large knife in front of him in the direction of the doctor, who stands with his hands up in a non-threatening gesture.
"I just need to see that wound on your leg, son." The doctor says, calmly. "There's no need for this."
"No wound! I- I'm just fine!" The man insists, sounding hysterical. There's blood running from his nose.
"You got bit last night, didn't you." The doctor still sounds calm, though there's a solemn grimness to his tone.
"No! No, I'm fine! There's no bite! I'm okay-"
The door slams suddenly open behind them and Liu and Jeff quickly move out of the way as Mr Green rushes into the room, a gun in his hands.
"He's bit." The doctor says, motioning to the man with the knife.
Without hesitation, Green fires, shooting the man in the chest and killing him.
Terror on his face, Liu's grip on his brother tightens, holding him protectively close to himself.
Green turns and leaves without a word.
The doctor turns from the corpse on the ground to face Jeff and Liu. "Now, what can I do for you boys?"
"N-nothing." Liu stammers, the two teenagers quickly heading for the door.
Back out in the courtyard, people are agitated and concerned, asking questions about the gunshot and whereabouts of the injured man. Mr Green is attempting to keep order. "He was bit. I put him down." He explains, matter-of-factly.
"He was no damn sick dog!" Someone objects, clearly disgusted and frightened.
"He was bit, and when they're bit, they turn." Green responds sternly, walking over to the carcass of the wolf-like monster that lays on the ground, pointing to it and looking around at the men. "Like this one here. You want to allow such a thing to keep breathing?"
"Come on, Jeff." Liu hurries Jeff past the scene, leading him back towards the house. As he's ushered inside, Jeff leans on Liu for support, hardly able to stay on his feet.
Back in their room, Liu tries to sit Jeff down on the bed, but Jeff refuses, pushing away from his brother and instead stumbling over to the large portrait on the wall. "This girl. The one whose room this was." He mumbles, running a hand over the girl in the painting. He narrows his eyes, inspecting her face closely. "She's not dead. She's what bit me." He's sure of it. The girl he'd found locked in that little room, there'd been something wrong with her face, and she was ghostly white with jet black hair. But the similarities to the normal looking blond child in the painting are still clear. And as far as anyone has made them aware, the only small child to have ever lived here was this girl.
"Jeff, sit down." Liu says, gently, yet his extreme alarm and concern is hardly contained. "You're so pale." He takes Jeff by the arm and tries to urge him over to the bed.
"The girl, she's turning into one of those things." Jeff mutters, allowing Liu to guide him over to and sit him down on the bed. Then he looks up, meeting his Liu's concerned eyes with an intense look. "And so am I."
"No." Liu says, quickly. He places a hand on Jeff's head and strokes his hair, looking at him with teary, fearful eyes. "We'll fix it. There has to be something we can-"
"I can smell your blood, Liu." Jeff cuts him off, leaning suddenly closer, his nose almost brushing Liu's neck. He closes his eyes and groans softly. ".. I want it."
A tear rolls down Liu's face, terrified for the fate of his younger brother. With trembling hands, he pulls Jeff close and wraps him in a protective hug.
"Hey, it's fine." Jeff forces a laugh. "I've always been a monster, anyway. Right?"
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