Work Text:
This is it then.
All the lies, the murders.
It’s all out of the bag now.
And for what? For status? For a selfish gain?
Now look at him, rotting in a cell, waiting for his punishment.
What could-
“Seishiro Jigoku” one of the guards had come up. “You have a visitor.”
A visitor? But who could possibly want to visit him?
It wouldn’t be Yujin or Sholmes, they seemed content with the results of the trial. It surely wouldn’t be Kazuma either.
So who could-
“Jigoku?”
That familiar voice again, it answered itself, hadn’t it?
He got up from where he was sitting and looked at the visitor, Ryuunosuke Naruhodou.
“I hadn’t expected you to be here, Naruhodou.” He stated, he seemed confused but curious. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready to head back to Japan?” He asked as he looked down at the lawyer who put him here.
“W-well yes,” he stammered. “But I still have some time left before we leave.”
Now Jigoku is even more confused.
“What could you possibly want from me?” He asked with a demanding tone. Ryuunosuke shook a little but quickly calmed down. “I just wanted to ask you a question, that is all I’m here for.” His eyes looked serious.
But he didn’t want to waste his time with a pointless question, so perhaps staying silent and turning around would-
“Please father…”
Oh.
That's the first time he’s ever been called father, it’s weird to hear from his son after making him only use his real name.
“I just want you to answer my question, truthfully.”
…
He sighed and turned around to look at his son, even if it wasn’t obvious at first glance, he could see some parts of himself in his son. “Alright then,” Ryuunosuke looks almost worried. “However I cannot promise to be ever truthful.” He added.
Ryuunosuke nods.
It’s an awkward silence, minus the muttering. Ryuunosuke did seem to have a problem with unknowingly muttering his inside thought.
Really thought he had took care of that-
“Do you still see me as your son?”
there’s a slight shakiness when he speaks, it’s as if he’s struggling to keep himself from crying. He wanted some sort of answer but he’s prepared himself mentally for nothing.
And at first, he seemed correct for a while.
He had expected this, Jigoku never was one to say his feelings about his own family. So he slowly turned away to leave, It was dumb of him to have thought he’d actually believe a man like him would care about-
“Depends.”
He stops in his tracks, turning around and his eyes slowly widen.
Jigoku is looking at him, properly.
“If I am honest,” he starts. “I had never wanted children of my own.” He exclaimed. Ryuunosuke just kinda stood there for a moment, surprised. “So I was an accident?” He asked.
“I suppose you could be considered as such.”
So that is a yes…
“But that aside…” he continues. “When you were born, I was willing to…” there’s a slight pause, it makes Ryuunosuke worry a bit.
“I was willing to manage.”
That…was definitely an answer.
And Ryuunosuke feels a little more…actually He doesn’t know how to feel about that.
“Your mother and I agreed to take turns caring for you.” he started up again. “However, we had also agreed to-“
“Keep me an secret?” He interrupted, already connecting the dots. Jigoku's eyes widened but he didn’t seem to care much either. “Yes…” he replied.
“Do you regret it?” He asked cautiously. Jigoku paused, it’s unclear if he does or does not.
But he signs and answers, “I have very few regrets,” he started. “But you were not one of them.” There’s a genuine tone to his voice, but Ryuunosuke doesn’t—no…
He can’t let himself blindly believe that.
“If you mean it, why did you agree to have tried for a murder you knew I wouldn’t have committed?” He replied, a slight demand in his voice makes feel out of touch with himself.
“Did you think twice about accusing me of the same?” Jigoku barks back, and Ryuunosuke can’t get himself to answer back, because he knows he didn’t.
“Then I suppose the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” Jigoku laughs at that, even if he doesn’t say it, it’s obvious he KNOWS. And It hurts him a bit, knowing that part of his father’s psychology is almost drilled into him.
Jigoku seems to calm down, relaxing his face and looking at his son. “While we are here, I would like to ask you something myself.” Ryuunosuke eyes widened again at the sudden change in topic.
“Sorry?”
“I have answered your question, so I might as well ask my own.” He took a breath as he prepared himself. Ryuunosuke thought about it, before nodding his head in agreement.
This is the most him and his father had spoken about something personal, it would be a waste to-
“Do you still perceive me as your father?”
Huh?
“I want to know if you still see me as your father,” he continued “after everything I’ve done and lied about, do you still see me as a father?”
He couldn’t answer right away, what could he even say?
…
“I..” he starts off but stumbles over his words. Eventually, he composes himself.
“I do not know.”
“You do not know?” Jigoku looks confused. “What kind of answer is-“ He gets cut off by Ryuunosuke again. “I am aware it is not a good answer to give,” he starts off, “because on one hand, I don’t feel anything for you.”
He takes a breath in as he continues.
“You are not a good person, You have lied and mistreated others for your own gain.”
Jigoku closes his eyes, he had expected this answer. No good action he had done before could ever excuse the things he had done.
“But at the same time,” Ryuunosuke's voice shook a bit as he continued. “I cannot get myself to loathe you.”
Jigoku's eyes widened because of that.
“What?”
Jigoku has to collect himself and respond. “But I have-“
“I’m not saying that I still love you as my father,” Ryuunosuke added. “ I do not even believe I have ever actually loved you as such.”
That just confuses him ever more.
“I..I think…” Ryuunosuke stutters a bit. “I think just see you as a man who let me live with him.”
…
It’s too quiet now.
Jigoku got his answer, and so did Ryuunosuke, but it’s now too quiet.
“I actually remember the time you took me to the market.” Ryuunosuke slightly smiled as he spoke, Jigoku looked more surprised that he had still remembered that. “You had needed to grab something and decide to bring me along,” he’d laugh if he could consider the memory funny.
“You bought me a single Dango and Daruma.”
Jigoku chuckled, “and then you wandered off and got yourself lost.”
Ah…of course you only remembered that.
“I had to look all over for you, you know that?” He asked in a joking manner. “Yes..I recall vaguely walking around with a Daruma and a Dango…” he begrudgingly replied.
Jigoku laughed, it was loud like always but Ryuunosuke didn’t mind. If anything he's weirdly happy about that.
Eventually, he calms down. The awkward silence crawls back, but that was almost expected.
They both got the answers to their questions, so now what?
…..
“I suppose,” Ryuunosuke slowly begins to say something. “I should be on my way out then…” Jigoku seemed…saddened by this? He isn’t sure himself but he seems rather unsure of it.
“Alright then…” is all Jigoku can say, there’s not much he can say if he’s being honest. He goes to sit down and the bed in his cell, waiting for something to await him.
But something is bothering him,
Does he want this to be how his last interaction with his son goes? Just them asking questions and going over one single memory? Is that really what he was okay with?
“Ryuunosuke, Hold on.” Jigoku suddenly spoke out. Luckily, Ryuunosuke hadn’t fully left yet. “Sorry? Did you-“
“When you return to Japan,” he begins to speak in an almost somber tone. “Tell your mother that I still cared her, even if it had felt fake.”
…
“Okay…” Ryuunosuke sounded confused, but at the same time…
“If it means anything,” Ryuunosuke looked at his father, all Jigoku could see was his wife’s eyes. It hunted him a bit, hes not sure what, but he knew something hurts.
“Even if you weren’t the best,” Ryuunosuke started to smile as he continued. “I’m at least glad you tried to be my dad.” He waved goodbye and started to walk away.
There was nothing else that needed to be said.
He just smiled and waved back to his son as he left.
He wouldn’t see the life he left behind, but he's grateful that something good for once happened.
It’s the first time he’s ever had an actual conversation with his own son.