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How to Become Legendary (Probably)

Summary:

Cross and Epic are the most legendary thieves in the whole world! But there is just one teeny tiny problem…that is actually…not…true, heh.

But it is okay! All they need is an opportunity to show the world what they are capable of!

And an opportunity is exactly what they got, all they need to do is invade a rich guy's mansion and steal an artifact that only existed in legends.

What could possibly go wrong!?

(Answer: a lot.)

Or, follow Cross, Epic, and a very questionable new addition as they try to build a name for themselves without getting caught, killed, or completely derailing their own plan.

Chapter 1: This One is Different, I Swear

Notes:

I may not know what I'm doing or why I did this.

Anyway, I hope that you enjoy!!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The screams of vendors filled the hot afternoon air. Each one more desperate than the last, trying to sell their goods before the nightfall. The market streets were packed, bodies brushing against each other at every step. Strong smells of spices and sweat lingered in the air. It had always felt a bit claustrophobic around this time. 

In the middle of the chaos, a monster pulled the hood of his cloak slightly lower after he ended up bumping into yet another person. He brushed off the insults that were being thrown his way by simply walking faster. He wouldn't let one rude stranger ruin his day, at least not today.

Today he was excited!

Staying close to the upper parts of the city until this late had just proven to be worth it!

After a few more struggles, the monster finally pushed through the crowd, reaching the end of the Market, letting out a deep, relieved breath. A few people looked his way, none with a very pleased look.

Keeping his head down, the hooded person quickly moved away trying to avoid bringing more unwanted attention. After reaching the more calm part of the city he broke into a sprint, not wanting to wait another minute to tell his friend what he had found. 

He skidded to a stop as he reached an old looking building. The patches on the roof and the dirty look of the entrance were not the most pleasing thing to see but that didn't bother him… Maybe the crooked sign did bother him a bit. Cloret Inn was not the prettiest nor the biggest of its kind, but it had its perks like… well, it was cheap.

He pushed the creaking entrance door open a little harder than he should have and walked quickly past the reception. Without wasting time he climbed the old creaking stairs, avoiding bumping into another patron in the narrow hallway.

“I have good news!” Not waiting another second he flung the door to the room open with a loud noise.

“HOLY SH-!” 

Something came flying straight at his face. He ducked on instinct. The object missed him by inches and hit the floor with a heavy thud.

His gaze shifted to the pathetic excuse for a projectile. Now on the ground, there was a book. A really thick book. His assailant glared towards him. “WHAT WAS THAT FOR, BRUH?!”

The hooded person entered the room and closed the door with far more care than when he opened it. Ignoring how his friend's lone eyelight was trying to burn a hole in his skull.

“Dude.” He pulled his hood down, showing fully his skeleton features with a, almost hopeful, smile on his face. “I just found something that is going to change our lives."

“You said that the last four times.” The one with a purple coat raised a non-existent eyebrow. Then as if remembering something he added. “Actually, no, it was five.”

“Ah- well!” He sputtered as he walked to the middle of the room. Cross sharply turned back to his friend with a more confident expression. “This time it's different, Epic!”

“Cross, I swear, If it is another Dragon egg-”

“WE SWORE TO NOT TALK ABOUT THAT!” Cross's face flushed almost completely violet. There was a pause. He coughed into his fist, regaining composure, then made a motion for Epic to get closer.

Rolling his eyelight, Epic pushed himself off from his bed and stopped just a few inches from his friend.

“So?”

“The Sea Tear.”

Silence was what followed.

As more time passed without him getting a response the more the sound of the crickets outside was getting on Cross’s nerves.

Epic blinked slowly.

 

Once

 

Twice

 

“…you’re lying.”

“I’m not.” He let out a nervous laugh. Epic straightened and pointed a finger right in Cross's face.

“You are absolutely lying.”

“I am not lying.” He threw his hands up as his friend started to pace in the cramped room.

“There is no way you actually found it.” Epic grabbed the hood of his coat pulling it as if he was ready to rip the thing apart. “NO WAY I SAY!” He turned to face the other. “It must not be the real thing.” 

“Actually” Cross sat at his own bed with a smug smile. “It is the real thing.”

Epic stopped pacing and glared at his friend with exasperation.

“Nope, nu-hu, absolutely not!” He pointed at Cross. “There is no way you just stumbled into information about one of the rarest artifacts in existence.”

“I didn't stumble.” Cross shot back, crossing his arms. “You know how maids, and a few guards, do love some gossip, you just need to know how to look for the right ones!”

A defeated sigh escaped his friend as he made his way to Cross. The smaller skeleton dropped himself on the bed, making it creak loudly with the extra weight. They exchanged a worried look before bursting into laughter. 

Epic fully laid on it, legs hanging off the side of the bed. He used magic to levitate the forgotten book back to his hands, which made Cross roll his eyelights. 

“Let's say that I believe you.” The other's fingers traced the words written on the cover absentmindedly. His eyelight locked onto Cross’s. A hint of amusement and curiosity dancing on it. “Where is it?”

Cross started nervously fidgeting his fingers. He glanced off to the side trying to think of a way to tell his friend what he found without making Epic give up on even trying. 

Worry started to take hold of Epic's face as Cross's silence stretched. Finally making up his mind, Cross decided to just start talking, failing to notice how the other's hand was about to reach him.

“It’s in a vault.” He said abruptly. Suddenly flopping backwards and landing on Epic with enough force to make him let out a small ‘oof’. “Rumors say that this city mayor is known for collecting only the rarest of things.”

He turned to face Epic, receiving an unamused glare. Cross let out a protest as his friend decided to use him as a table, putting the book on his torso and holding it there. With his other hand, Epic scratched the scar on his left eye.

“Legal or Illegal ways?”

“Illegal.” Cross' smile returned as he saw Epic's expression shift.

“Wow, bruh, you might actually be onto something.”

“Hey!”

“Say, you got a plan?” Epic booped Cross's nosebridge and got his hand swatted right away. Cross annoyed expression shifted to a more pensive one.

“I was thinking of assessing the situation tomorrow.” 

Epic hummed, bringing a hand to hold his chin. His skull tilted a little.

 “That's a start.” He reached a pillow and smacked at Cross's face. “Now get off me, bruh.”

“Never - oi!” 

 

The pillow hit his face again.

 

Notes:

Thanks for reading!

Btw, updates will probably be slow because of college.