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Danger came with the territory of Officer Tom Ludlow's job. For decades, his go-to coping method was found in a bottle or two—or three or four—he himself was still shocked he had some semblance of a liver. After all this time and the countless losses in his life, he was convinced this would be the only way he could numb the pain. But, for the past several months, he's found a better, far more healthier distraction: you. He was not perfect by any means—he still had flareups with his alcohol consumption—but he was miles away from what it once was. In this world of corruption, and the raincloud called his mind, he could always count on coming home to the little the ball of sunshine that was you.
It became an unspoken ritual between the two of you: his car would pull into his driveway, you would be sitting on your front porch, likely reading, journaling, or simply watching the watercolor sunset being painted across the sky. He would get out of his car and begin walking across his yard towards your own—it was convenient that you were his neighbor—by that time, you would already be on your feet and bounding down the concrete steps before launching yourself into his strong arms. Without fail, he would catch you, nuzzling into your hair as your comforting scent invaded his senses.
What followed, after he held you tight against him while he opened your door, ranged from gentle domestic activities like helping you cook and setting the table, to more physical acts like pressing you up against the wall and kissing you senseless, or—his personal favorite—throwing you over his shoulder and taking you straight to the bedroom.
No matter what, your playful and lighthearted personality softened his calloused demeanor. One night while he was sitting on your couch trying to decompress after a difficult operation, you plopped into his lap like you belonged there (you did) and traced idle patterns along his biceps and torso.
"I can hear the gears turning in your head, sunshine," he grumbles, but the affection was still present. "What're you thinking?"
That got a small chuckle out of you. "I just wanted to tell you that if you ever needed some stress relief…for anything, you can come to me."
You were now looking into his tired eyes, your own showing nothing but sincerity. "Anytime."
He pulls you even closer, one hand cradling your back and the other lazily resting against your thigh. "I'll keep that in mind."
🚨🚨🚨
You were too sweet, too wholesome for this world. He did everything in his power to keep the darkness of his profession off of you. But tonight, the darkness consumed him with a vengeance, sticking its tendrils of self loathing and regret into every part of his soul.
He knew before leaving for work that it was going to be a long, grueling night. As he kissed you goodbye, he adamantly told you not to wait up for him.
"Is that an order, Officer?" you whisper against his mouth.
"Smart-ass." He mumbles before nipping your bottom lip for good measure.
Damn you for getting him hard before a job.
It was well past one o'clock in the morning before he is near falling out of his car and slinking to your front door. The mission had gone awry and he dampened his inner demons in the interim with multiple bottles of cheap beer and vodka. His body was going to hate him later, but the need to feel numb was greater than his weakened willpower. He pushed through not passing out on your welcome mat and managed to get his copy of your house key into the lock.
Your house was his sanctuary. His own held too many bad memories. The longer he was in a relationship with you, the more he found himself staying over and wanting to wake up next to you for the rest of his sorry life. He made sure your front door was locked again after he lets himself in—as well as checking the back door and closing the living room blinds. There was no such thing as "too careful" when it came to you.
With the home secured, he staggered down the hall and came to your bedroom. You left the door open for him, blessing his exhausted eyes with the image of you peacefully asleep—laid out on your back, one of your legs slightly bent and half-covered by the bedsheets, your hands resting delicately by your head. You looked like an angel. He pants tighten and he had to avert his eyes. You were wonderful and he was unworthy to even look upon you, let alone have these rapidly growing inappropriate desires.
Too exhausted to even remove his boots, he skulked into your bed and all but collapsed on top of you like a weighted blanket. He often rolled his eyes with a low chuckle when you called him that while cuddling, but at this moment, through his inebriated brain, that was all he wanted to be—to comfort, to protect, and to hide you from the world. He sought out your scent, his nose brushing against the crook of your neck. If only you know how much you were his remedy. His fingers laced with your smaller ones, his thumb idle rubbing up and down along your pulse point.
With his nose and lips occupied with your throat, and his hand holding both of yours, he realized one growing part of himself needed attention. The stress from this night was too much and was in dire need of relief, emotionally and physically. He tried discretely rolling his hips against you, but it only made him harder and his pants uncomfortable.
He remembered your offer of stress relief no matter what it was or when he needed it. He was finally taking you up on the anything and anytime part.
With one hand, he pulled the covers down and carefully parted your legs more, with the other he undid his belt buckle and sloppily unzipped his pants. While taking his cock out and giving it a couple long pulls in preparation, he hiked up your pajamas—discovering that you weren't wearing any underwear.
Naughty girl he thinks as he moistened his middle finger with his tongue and lightly grazed your entrance. You were soaking wet, lucky him.
"You're so perfect, baby," he slurs. The head of his cock enters you, a faint whine escapes you and combines with his guttural groan. "Shh, it's okay, sunshine…go back to sleep and let me use you…"
He bottoms out, your walls squeezing him in a warm vice, welcoming him home as he pushes deeper inside you.
This counts as a hug, right?
Gripping your thigh, he set an immediate rapid pace, his free hand groping and touching you in a desperate frenzy, your body acting as an anchor for his sanity. Soon, the only noise filling your room was the creak of your bed frame and Tom's primal grunting.
"You're such a good girl. You deserve someone so much better. You are my angel and everything I am undeserving of." He said these words and all their variants jumbled together repeatedly and reverently like a prayer.
He ruts in you like the animal that he is, his mouth finding home on your throat and chest. His hands held you impossibly close, his fingers bearing down almost painfully against your shoulders and driving him further into your cunt. If he had his way, he'd keep you under him with his cock inside you forever—that's the closest he would ever get to a Heaven he'd never be worthy of.
When he finally came undone, he kissed your cheek with an inaudible "thank you" before everything went black.
🚨🚨🚨
He gradually stirred with the sensation of dainty fingers running up and down his wide back. "Good morning, Officer."
Opening his bleary eyes, he is met with your beautiful smile…and your neck marked with vibrant purple hickeys, and your shoulders and upper arms decorated with subtle bruises where he held you a little too hard. To top it all off, he was still inside you and his pants hung embarrassingly around his booted feet.
"God, I'm so sorry," he whispers ashamedly and begins to pull out—only for your legs to wrap snugly around his waist.
"Stay…" you murmur, your arms now circling his neck.
"I shouldn't have done that—shouldn't have taken advantage—"
You stop him with a big smacking kiss. "Tom, you don't understand—I love what you did."
"What d'you mean?" His voice carries exhausted confusion.
"While I was asleep, and you were taking care of your needs…I'm into that a lot." You gift him with another one of your shy smiles, giggling as you revealed your kink. "I wasn't kidding when I told you anytime."
He smirks, reassured and already planning the next time he's going to need some stress relief. "I'll keep that in mind."