Chapter Text
Crowley grumbled incomprehensibly as he rearranged his gangling arms and legs so they were all in the shade of the poolside umbrella, no small feat for limbs as unwieldy as his. Meanwhile, his kids splashed excitedly in the pool, oblivious to the amount of work it took him to get the three of them ready for an afternoon in the water.
With complexions more suited for the dreary skies of their home in London than for this Caribbean resort, they had waited impatiently as he lotioned and sprayed all the SPF money could buy. As soon as he finished, the twins squealed happily and cannonballed into the water.
Content that he was protected by the shade, Crowley relaxed and sipped his drink. The kids had finally made it to the point where they could swim without hanging on him, grasping with nails that always seemed to be in need of a trim and knobby knees that found his groin with laser-like precision.
Crowley crossed his arms and tucked his chin to take a long swig from the straw of the strawberry daiquiri he wouldn’t be caught dead drinking at home—only dry red wine or peaty single-malt scotch for him; he had an image to uphold—when he realised he didn’t hate it here.
Slumping further into his chair, he watched his kids giggle and splash each other. This trip had been their idea. Being the first winter holiday since their mum died, they wanted to get away from their usual traditions and the home where Lucia’s ghost lurked around every corner.
He fidgeted with the pendant hanging from his neck. Fuck, he missed her so much. She would have hated it here, but she loved their little nontraditional family just as much as he did. She would have soaked up the sun (why couldn’t at least one of their children inherit her bronze skin that glowed in the sun instead of his that burnt to a crisp?) and laughed at their son's and daughter’s silliness.
No one understood him like Lucia. Who else could look at their gay best friend and successfully proposition him simply by saying, “I am ovulating, and I want you to be the father of my child.” For once in his life he didn’t ask questions. The next thing he knew, they had done a few shots together before she was bent over, and he was pretending she was someone completely different, someone sturdy and broad-shouldered, as he filled her with his seed.
The next morning they woke in Luce’s decedent king-size bed, heads throbbing with hangovers, giggling at the absurdity of the previous night. She was already convinced she was pregnant. He thought she was out of her mind, but he humoured her, enjoying the fantasy of the two of them using their love to create new life—even if it wasn’t the conventional sort of love.
Of course, she was right. Ten weeks later, they sat hand-in-hand in a small, dark room and saw two flickering heartbeats on an ultrasound. Part of Crowley thought his life ended that day, but now he knew that’s when it began.
The babies were born two weeks after she completed her pupillage to become a barrister. They spent a sleepless summer adjusting to life as a family of four before she started her job at a fancy firm in London. They—well, she—bought a flat with dual primary suites and a room for each child.
Sometimes, rarely, one or the other of them found a man to pass the time, having an itch that the other couldn’t scratch. But mostly they were content with the platonic affection and support they provided each other, not to mention the unconditional love of their children.
For seven years, everything was perfect. Lucia made more money than they knew what to do with; Crowley was a stay-at-home dad who, in his precious spare time, tended the most beautiful rooftop garden in London. Their kids were safe and loved and supported.
It was a dream come true.
It was too good to be true.
Shortly after the twins’ seventh birthday Lucia came down with a cold. She got better, but her cough persisted.
She continued to work, and they played and loved as hard as ever. But, eventually, neither of them could ignore the fact something wasn’t right. There were X-rays and PET scans and chemo and hospital stays and radiation and long nights holding hands crying on each other’s shoulders, followed by stage four and terminal and finally hospice and end-of-life care.
Then she was gone. Their two perfect children wearing black stood stoically next to their mother’s casket, and Crowley tried to act like the grown up, like he knew what the fuck he was going to do without her.
Of course, Lucia took care of them even in death. Her trust fund and life insurance meant Crowley and the kids were set for life, even with splurges like this holiday.
One night, when she was still lucid but death was imminent, Crowley had cried into her short hair, thin from several rounds of chemo. “You’re the love of my life.”
She looked up at him, her dark eyes a blazing inferno. “No, I am not. You will know greater love than this. You deserve it all. More than I could give you.”
“Luce, you gave me everything. I can’t—“
“Shhh.” She pulled his head onto her breast and he could feel her ribs where her skin pulled taut. Through his tears, his eyes struggled to focus on the obsidian lantern pendant that rested in the hollow of her sternum. She had lost so much weight, but her heartbeat was still strong beneath his ear. “You can,” she insisted. “I wouldn’t go if I thought you would spend your life alone. Take care of our babies, but open yourself up to love. It’s out there waiting for you. You deserve it.”
Crowley swallowed around the growing lump in his throat as he took another sip of his daiquiri, obnoxiously slurping through the straw when he reached the bottom of the drink.
“Pardon me,” a posh voice interrupted. Crowley’s jaw dropped dumbly when he looked up and saw the man speaking to him. He was broad-shouldered and soft, wearing a white linen shirt and baby blue swimming trunks with a wild halo of white-blond curls atop his head.
“Pardon me,” the man repeated as he fidgeted nervously with the buttons of his shirt. Crowley wondered what he could do to get a peek at what was under that shirt. (Then he remembered with anticipation that they were at a swimming pool and chances were good the man would remove it.) “Do you mind if I sit here? If you’re craving alone time, I won’t bother you.” He held up a worn copy of Jane Eyre. “But shade is hard to come by, and I’ll be a tomato in no time flat if I’m out in the sun.”
“Yeah, sure, no problem,” Crowley said, not able to believe his luck. This might be the most beautiful man he had ever seen. He didn’t mind basking in his presence for a while.
Unfortunately, as soon as the angelic man settled into the chair, a cry of “Daaaaaddy!!!” echoed across the pool deck.
Crowley whipped his head around, but was relieved to see it wasn’t one of his hellions yelling. A dark-skinned girl around the same age as the twins was in the pool hanging onto the wall, shrieking, “Daddy, I’m bored!!”
The angel sitting next to him let out an exhausted sigh. Crowley prepared himself for an uptight tirade about children these days and was surprised when instead he said, “Pepper, my dear, if you give me a break for fifteen minutes, I'll join you. But I would like a moment to unwind.”
The girl rolled her eyes, clearly unconcerned with the fact that the angel seemed to be at the end of his rope. Thinking quickly, Crowley decided to jump in and see if he could make both Pepper and her father happy.
Crowley hopped up from his chair and went to the water’s edge. “Lil!” he called out. “Levi! C'mere!” His kids turned in his direction. Then he addressed the bored girl. “Pepper, is it?”
She nodded her head suspiciously.
“What do you want, Da-aaa-ad?” Lil whined, making Dad sound like it had three syllables.
He gestured to Pepper. “This is Pepper. I don't think she has anyone to play with except her curmudgeonly old father. Pepper, this is Lil and Levi. Seems like you three are around the same age. You should all play together.”
“Why, Dad?” Lil asked. She was never one to just do what was asked of her; she always needed some convincing.
“Maybe because not every kid has a built-in best mate like the two of you do.” Then Crowley turned his attention to Pepper. “Pepper, what do you like to do?”
The girl held up a handful of dive toys that were shaped like, well, he wasn’t going to think about what in front of the kids, and said, “I mostly just play with my dive toys.”
That got Levi’s attention. “I’m the best diver ever!” he shouted. “I can dive deeper than anyone I know.”
“I can dive deep too,” Pepper retorted. “Watch!” She threw a torpedo-shaped (torpedos! That’s what they’re shaped like) toy towards the far side of the pool.
At that, the three kids all swam off together, making fast friends as children were wont to do, while Crowley reclaimed his spot in the shade.
“Cheers,” he said, raising his empty daiquiri cup to the other man, who had a pleased smile on his face.
“Cheers,” the angel responded. “Thank you very much. That was very kind.”
“Ngk. Not kind. Just didn't want to listen to your kid whinging and ruining my serenity.”
“Well, you could have left out the part about me being curmudgeonly and old, I’ll give you that.” The other man smiled, unfazed by Crowley’s grumpiness. “Whatever your motivation, you bought me a few minutes of peace and quiet for which I am eternally grateful. Let me thank you by getting you a drink. What're you having?”
Crowley considered declining. Very briefly. Despite the elevated temperatures, he found himself craving the other man's warmth. If letting him get a drink kept him around a few minutes longer, Crowley could handle that. Maybe he could even let his guard down and admit what he was drinking.
Ehhh, maybe not. “It's scotch. Single malt.”
The angel had the audacity to giggle at him. It was bloody beautiful, the ridiculous way his face lit up. “Single malt scotch poolside in the Caribbean?”
“Yeah, what of it?”
He gestured to the remnants of Crowley’s previous drink clinging to the sides of the empty cup. “Whatever you were drinking before was pink. I've never seen pink scotch.”
“If they don't have good scotch, I suppose a strawberry daiquiri will do in a pinch.”
The other man laughed so deeply his belly shook. "Oh, I needed that," he said, wiping his eyes. “Thank you. Yesterday was a long day of travel, and I'm still recovering.”
Crowley just stared at him and wondered how a person could be so fucking sunny.
“Alright!” he exclaimed with a wink. “I'll be right back with your daiquiri. Save my seat.”
“Sure thing, angel,” Crowley said, watching the other man's shapely arse as he made his way over to the poolside bar.
When the angel returned, he placed Crowley's drink in front of him and sat down with a fruity pink drink of his own. “So”—he nodded towards the kids—“that's your son and daughter?”
“Yeah, Lilith and Levi. The lights of my bloody life.”
There was that giggle again. “They favour you.”
“Yeah, it's too bad. If they had taken after their mum, we would save a fortune on sun cream.” He nodded to the sticks and sprays and lotions peeking out of his pool bag.
“Ahh, yes, I am fortunate with Pepper. Though we do have to be careful still. I wasn't prepared for how quickly she could burn even with her darker skin. So their mother, is she here with you?”
Crowley let his lips flap as he exhaled. “That is a long story. But no, she's not here.”
“I'm sorry; I didn't mean to pry.”
“No, don't worry. It's just that our arrangement was... unorthodox. Their mum, Lucia, she was my best friend. We were never together beyond co-parenting. She... Well, she died earlier this year. So, now it's just the twins and me.”
“Oh.” The angel's mouth formed an adorable O, indicating his surprise at Crowley's revelation. “Again, I'm very sorry. Your son and daughter are beautiful.” He watched the three children playing together for a moment. “And they are obviously well-adjusted. You should be very proud of them.”
“Thanks. They're the best part of my life by a long shot. What about you? Are you and Pepper travelling with anyone else?”
The angel shook his head. "No, my ex-husband and I split up several years ago. He's something of a workaholic and never seems to have time for Pepper." He set his drink on the table and smoothed his palms over the swell of his belly. "Really, though, she's better off without him. He's a complete prat. I don't know what I ever saw in him in the first place."
Crowley chuckled. He chose his next words carefully, wanting to make sure he gave this beautiful man the correct impression. “That was the great thing about having Lucia in my life. She saved me from getting in too deep with the wrong guy. She was always telling me, ‘Crowley, you're a catch. You've got to have some standards.’” He drifted off, thinking about how he never really looked for or felt like he needed a long-term relationship when she was in his life.
Seeming to sense his change in mood, the other man said gently, “She sounds like a very special person.”
“Yeah, the kids and I were lucky to have her, even if our time together was too short.”
They sat there, letting the gravity of the moment settle until another cry of “Daddy Daddy Daddy” split it right open.
This time Levi was clinging to the wall of the pool with an urgent message for his father.
“Wossit, kid?” Crowley asked.
He watched his son’s little chest expand as he took a deep breath before the words tumbled out of his mouth. “Pepper and her dad feed bread to the ducks at St. James’s. Bread!” he said, outraged in the way only an eight-year-old can be.
“Nooooo!” Crowley exclaimed as he looked at the angel. “You can’t feed them bread!”
Levi jumped in, “Yeah, it’s bad for them. We feed them frozen peas!”
“Well, thank you, my dear boy, for enlightening me. This just shows you’re never too old,”—he shot a look at Crowley—“or curmudgeonly to learn something new. How did you know that?”
“From my dad!” He bounced up and down in the water. “He knows everything about the park!” He jumped up as high as he could and splashed on his back before flipping over and swimming away to rejoin Pepper and Lil.
Crowley could feel heat on his cheeks and the tips of his ears as the angel turned to him. “You know everything about the park?”
“Ngk. Picked up a thing or two over the years.”
“So you’re from London too?”
“Yep. We have a flat in Mayfair. We spend a lot of time in the park.”
“I’m surprised we haven’t crossed paths. I have a bookshop in Soho. Pepper and I live in the flat above. We’re practically neighbours.”
“How about that? And we had to travel halfway across the world to meet.”
“Yes,” the angel replied with his stormcloud eyes fixed on Crowley’s. “How about that. I’m Aziraphale, by the way.”
“Hi, Aziraphale. Anthony Crowley, but you can call me Crowley.”
“It’s very nice to meet you, Crowley.”
The two men had a few moments of peace to enjoy their drinks before yet another call of “Daddy!”
This time Pepper was insistent that Aziraphale join the kids in the pool, asking for a ‘dolphin ride.’
When Aziraphale stood and unbuttoned his shirt, slowly revealing his beautiful body, Crowley’s mouth went dry. He couldn’t quite bring himself to look away, and as Aziraphale leaned over to lay his shirt on the chair, he caught Crowley’s eye and crooked an eyebrow.
(Crowley tried not to think about how much he would like to ride this beautiful man himself.)
Completely out of practice at flirting, Crowley was racking his brain for an appropriate response when Lil’s voice pierced his thoughts. “Dad, can you come play with us too?”
He would rather supervise from the pool deck, but he was a good dad who wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity to spend time with his kids—especially with a half-naked angel close by.
As he slipped his black t-shirt over his head, he wondered whether Aziraphale was into skinny gingers. Then he shook his head at the silly fantasy. What did it matter? It wasn’t like he was going to shag someone while he was on holiday with the kids.
The five of them played happily in the water. Aziraphale spent most of the time swimming around with a kid or two clinging to his back for a ‘dolphin ride.’ The radiance of his smile didn't dim the entire time, so Crowley decided to just go along with it, pinching or tickling or splashing whatever unsuspecting kid drifted too close to him. After a while, Levi climbed into his arms and buried his face in Crowley's neck.
He must be exhausted. No one loved the water more than his son. “You tired, sprout?” he whispered, trying to keep his voice low enough so his daughter wouldn't hear. The boy would never admit weakness in front of her.
"Mmmhmm,” he mumbled against Crowley’s skin.
Crowley looked over just in time to see Lil rubbing her eyes. “Hey, Pepper,” he said, “thanks for playing with us, but I think we're going to rest a little bit before dinner, so we don't fall asleep in our plates.”
His daughter looked up at him with large chestnut brown eyes. “But I'm not tired.”
“Yeah, but I am, so we're going to rest.” Crowley said as Levi yawned loudly, tickling his ear.
“It was very nice to meet the three of you.”
Aziraphale looked like he wanted to say something more, but before he could get it out Pepper interrupted him, “Are you going to the kids' club tomorrow? It sounds so fun. I can't wait to play with someone besides my dad.”
Lilith turned to him again. “Can we, Daddy?”
Of course they could. The kids' club was the number one reason he picked this particular resort. With the kids occupied for a few hours each day, maybe he would actually get a holiday himself. “Sure.”
“Yay!” both girls cried out in unison as they hugged.
Aziraphale looked up at him from where he was squatting in front of Pepper, helping her put on her pool coverup. “With the children otherwise engaged, would you like to have lunch together? I'm quite looking forward to sampling the resort's restaurants.”
“Yeah, great. Sounds good.”
They made plans to meet the next afternoon at an oceanfront restaurant that Aziraphale seemed well acquainted with, considering he arrived on the island just last night, and that Crowley didn't realise existed.
As Crowley walked back to the suite with his kids, Lil skipped down the corridors several feet ahead of him while Levi held tight to his hand the entire way.
Maybe this week wouldn’t be so bad after all.