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INMATE 97427-395
United States Penitentiary, Administrative Maximum Facility
Fremont county
COLORADO 81226
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
March 16, 2006
FLORENCE BATTEUX
Place Francois 1er
75008, Paris
FRANCE
Hey Florence
Thanks for your letter sweetheart. Or as they say in français ma puces. Super cool to get a letter all the way from France by the way. The perfume smell did last. Hermès, nice! Makes a change from the stink of sweat, open sewers, and alcoholic guards.
Really love the photo too. I've got a thing for blondes and girls with European accents. I think 17 in France is like 23 in America because you seem real mature. I would've liked a little more skin on show but then the guards would've taken it and you do not want those mouth breathers jerking off to your image. Not that I'm jerking off to it because you're 17 but you know. What I'm trying to say is, you're hot and if you were 18 and I wasn't in permanent solitary confinement in ADX Florence and somewhere that allowed conjugal visits then maybe you could fly out andcome visit me
And hey, today is my 29th birthday so check you out, getting me to sit down and reply and think about you on this day.
Anyway to answer your questions:
No I don't have a girlfriend anymore
Yeah I really did make jet boots. I made a whole ton of cool shit, I was a CEO of a massive weapons company.
Yeah the U.S government took all my money. ALL of it. I paid out $50 million in compensation and damages and the rest has been locked away. It's called asset seizure thieving fucks The lawyers are still figuring out what to do with it all. It's billions so it's going to get messy
I'm locked in a cell 23 hours a day. There's a desk, stool, and bed and it's all made of concrete. It's about 7ft by 12ft, so that's 3.5 meters by 2 meters. I get one hour out of the cell and the guards take me for a five minute shower and for a walk. I don't see any other inmates just the guards. Some of them are cool most of them aren't.
And I have to go for a walk as part of physiotherapy because I had to learn to walk again after the jet explosion. But that's it. I'm not allowed visits except from lawyers. They're asking me for more names of Supers I ki
Aside from that, there's a TV but everything is PG-13 to avoid triggering me. There's a radio but it's institution-run.
I'm not allowed to use the internet.
I'm not allowed to read or watch news, so that news clipping about Mr Incredible you said you put in, that's been destroyed when they checked over my mail. I don't read French anyway and the picture would've sent me into a rage so probably for the best.
When they bring my meals the prison doctor also comes once to give me an olanzapine pill. It's making me fat Prison food is bad. A lot of mystery meat. I play this game called 'what noise did this make when it was alive' I'd kill for a cheeseburger literally kill for one
it really fucking sucks that I got sent here. When they read out that guilty verdict I could've killed everyone in that entire fucking courtroom I was really upset. I am not guilty.
"In the face of the overwhelming evidence and brave testimonies from witnesses, surviving victims, and the Supers who worked tirelessly to stop you, I can only conclude that this was a heavily calculated and deeply murderous plot motivated by jealousy and selfish desires and you, Mr Pine, despite your engineering skills and technological innovations, are a great danger to the general public. I strongly recommend you be immediately removed from society and kept under a constant watch" to use the judge's own words. The guards let me keep a newspaper about the verdict and I've read that quote a lot
I'm not a danger Florence I'm just a nerd from Texas who did too much coke
thanks for signing the petition for my release. 900,000 signatures so far globally, mega impressive. I probably need about one million for each life sentence so we're looking at 53 million signatures...
I signed the photo for you and that should be in this letter and there's a special something for you that I don't give to just anyone so keep it safe.
Stay in school and don't do drugs
Lots of love
SYNDROME
❤️
In his claustrophobic and concrete cell, and wearing an itchy orange jumpsuit, Syndrome throws down the stubby pencil and shakes out his wrist. He picks up the photo of himself. It's a color printout from the Internet, and it's a good shot: he's hovering in the air, cyan blue flames erupting from his jet boots, arms held out victoriously, the crowd looking up at him in awe.
"Handsome fuck," he admires, then scribbles his signature onto it.
He runs a hand through his messy hair and yanks out two singular ginger hairs, then stuffs the letter, signed photo, and ginger hairs into a prison-issue envelope. He leaves it on the desk for collection later.
Syndrome then throws himself onto the hard bed and holds up the photo, staring at the blonde-haired teenager. She's cute. And 100% jailbait. She's the kind of girl he'd have stared at in school. She reminds him of Mia Flores from his AP calculus class, back when he was that ginger geek with the glasses and braces, the one who talks to himself, and he definitely jerked off thinking about her when he was sevente-nope nope nope don't think about that.
grrrr
Fuck, this isn't fair!
He rolls onto his stomach and screams into the flimsy pillow.
1,325 years.
That's 483,956 days.
And so far, he's served 32 of those days.