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Beth’s POV
One morning, me and Evie were sat watching Derry Girls on the telly as we had absolutely nothing to do. Evie was sniffling next to me as the girls wrapped their angel wings around each other.
"Oh Evie..." I sighed, wrapping an arm around her. "You've not cried this much since you made me watch Rocketman."
Evie often cried at films or TV shows, but it'd just entail her eyes watering, the occasional tear or sniffle escaping. When she cried this much, you knew she was really feeling it.
"I'm fine, I'm fine." She insisted. "It's just..."
She didn't need to explain - I already understood. "Yeah."
"Right, I'm just popping to the loo." She said with a smile. "I'll be back."
She started singing the song from "Hamilton" to herself as she made her way upstairs, leaving me to pick what we watched next. I was about to put on Miranda when my phone rang.
The contact simply read "James ❤️", which made me smile. I quickly answered it, wondering what my loving boyfriend could want that morning.
"Hello, love." I smiled.
"Hello." James said, his voice hoarse and his nose obviously blocked by the way he sniffled thickly afterwards.
"Are you okay?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I'm fine." He insisted, though it was obvious he wasn't. "Just wanted to ask, could you bring round my hot water bottle? I left it when it was cold once when we all hung out."
I chuckled, knowing full well why he was asking for it. "Oh James, are you poorly?"
He sniffled, a thick, wet cough escaping his lips. "Yeah, I am."
"Do you want me to come over?" I asked.
"Yes please." He said appreciatively.
"Where's Ed?" I asked. "Is he poorly too?"
"Yeah." He answered. "He's on the sofa downstairs."
"Poor thing." I said, having a brainwave. "We'll be over in ten minutes."
"What, are you bringing Evie with you too?"
"Yeah, she can look after Ed and I can keep you company." I explained. "Right, see you later."
"Bye my love."
I hung up, springing into action. "Evie!"
She was already halfway downstairs. "Yeah?"
"The boys are ill!"
No answer. Suddenly she burst into the room, halfway through putting on her coat.
"When are we leaving?" She asked.
"I said we'd be there in ten minutes, so now probably." I said.
"Oh good, I'm more than ready." So we rushed out of the house and set off towards the boys.
After a ten minute drive, we arrived at James' house. I already had a key, so we let ourselves in and the first thing we saw was a very pale looking Ed almost passed out on the sofa.
"Ed my love!" Evie shrieked as she wrapped her arms around him.
I went upstairs to find James, hot water bottle in hand. I opened the bedroom door to reveal James, dripping in sweat and curled up in bed.
I leant against the doorframe, catching his eye. "Aww, poor baby." I teased.
"Shut up." He mumbled, a scowl forming on his face from my teasing.
I frowned a little at how awful he looked. I made my way over and slipped into bed next to him, getting under the covers but still sitting up, looking down at his now confused expression.
"What are you doing?" He asked with a sniffle.
"Getting in bed with you." I said incredulously.
"Aren't you worried about it catching?"
"I don't give a shit about it catching." I proclaimed, letting him rest his head on my shoulder. "I just want to look after you."
He wrapped his arms around my waist, making me laugh at how clingy he was being.
"I promise James, I'm not going anywhere."
He nuzzled further into my shoulder and I knew soon enough I literally wouldn't be able to, no matter how hard I tried.
Evie's POV
"You do know you're going to catch my cold, don't you?" Ed asked weakly, sniffling.
"Yeah, but then you can look after me like I'm looking after you." I said, getting up from the sofa where I had been sitting for the last ten minutes.
"I wouldn't have it any other way." He said before coughing profusely.
"Oh love..." I cooed, now being in full on nurse mode. "Let's feel your forehead, actually."
I gently placed my palm on his sweaty forehead and gasped. "Ed, you're burning up!"
I rushed to grab him a cold flannel, my mind racing with one question as I entered the kitchen. I made sure the water was as cold as it could get, drenching the flannel and ringing it out before returning to Ed.
"Here sweetheart, this'll help." I said, placing it gently on his head.
He smiled appreciatively as I planted a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, my love."
He sniffled, seeming particularly downcast. He sluggishly shuffled so he was properly curled up under the blanket, sighing heavily.
"Angel, have you eaten anything today?" I finally asked, my question coming back to my mind.
He was silent for a moment. "Maybe..."
I raised an eyebrow and placed a hand on my hip, knowing he was lying. "Ed..."
"Fine, I haven't." He admitted, sighing. "I'm fine!"
"Ed, you have to eat something." I said firmly. "You'll only make yourself feel worse."
"But everything tastes weird!" He whined.
I sighed. "I know my love, but you especially need to get something down you."
He frowned. "Okay."
"Right, I'll tell you what." I said, a plan forming perfectly in my brain. "You check yourself now and while you're doing that I'll make you something nice and warm. It'll soothe your throat."
"I will." He said, suddenly gasping. "Shit, I left my pen upstairs!"
"Right, I'll go and get it you then." I said, easing his panic. "Don't move."
I padded upstairs, trying to be quiet as to not disturb Beth and James. Right on queue however, Beth opened the door, one hand behind her back.
"Oh, hey!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing?"
"I'm getting James a drink." Beth said, looking back at him through the open door.
"Beeeeeeeeeth!" James shouted, straining his throat. "What are you doing?"
"Stop shouting, you'll loose your voice!" She replied. "I'm getting your drink in a minute, Evie's here."
"Oh."
She laughed. "You literally gave me Ed's pen to give her."
I laughed then as she revealed the pen hidden behind her back. "Looking for this?"
"I was actually." I said, taking it. "How's your patient?"
"Not good, he's barely moved." Beth said. "How about you?"
"Yeah, he's not good either." I said, my voice laced with worry. "He's not had anything to eat yet all morning, he's burning up and I'm just..."
"Worried?"
"Yeah." I said, taking a breath. "Sorry, I just hate seeing him so out of sorts."
"I know." She said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "But he'll be okay. They both will."
"Yeah."
James suddenly shouted from in bed. "BEEEEEEEEEEEETH!"
She chuckled. "I'm on it!"
"I'll let you sort him out." I laughed. "See you later."
I padded downstairs, leaving her be. She laughed, rolling her eyes before disappearing.
Beth's POV
I sorted out a glass of water for James, chuckling to myself as he whined that I was taking too long.
"I'm on my way baby." I teased, peering into his room and seeing him scowling at me again.
"I can kick you out, you know."
"Yeah, but then I'd have to pry Evie away from Ed and with how she's being at the moment I wouldn't recommend it." I made my way over and sat on the bed next to him. "How did you two even get ill, anyway?"
"It was just...we just got it." He stuttered. "Can we watch something?"
"James Acaster, don't you dare lie to me." I said firmly. "What happened?"
He sighed; the game was up.
He mumbled quietly, barely audible. "I slept in a bush all night."
"What?"
"I missed the last train from Basingstoke and I had to sleep in a bush." He hissed. "There, are you quite satisfied?"
"Of course not!" I shouted. "Why didn't you call me?"
"Because my phone had died! Besides, you don't live anywhere near Basingstoke!" He yelled.
"I would have driven!" I said, exasperated. However when I looked back, I saw in his eyes something that I could only read as pure embarrassment.
"Wait," I grinned. "Are you embarrassed?"
"No." James said, sharply.
"Aww, you totally are!" I exclaimed, wrapping my arms around him. I kissed him on the forehead which seemed to cheer him up. "So how did Ed get sick?" I questioned.
"I may have infected him." He admitted.
"Wait. You rang him before me!" I yelled. "I am your girlfriend. I should be your first port of call."
"I'm sorry, okay. Would you mind not yelling in my ear." He whispered.
"Aww, I'm sorry." I said patronisingly. "You said you wanted to watch something. Do you want to go downstairs and watch something with Ed and Evie?"
"Yeah, I guess so." He mumbled.
"Right, I'll go ask Evie." I said. "Just to make sure they're both awake."
He nodded, still a little embarrassed but feeling much better than before.
I went downstairs to hear the clattering of bowls and cutlery, soon being met with the sight of Evie preparing to wash them.
"Evie!" I heard Ed shout from the sofa. "Can you get me a drink? And maybe a fresh hot water bottle? Oh, and I think my pen's just fallen down the gap in the sofa!"
"One second, sweetheart!" She shouted, turning the tap on. "Was your soup nice in the end then?"
"Yeah actually, I thought it would taste weird but it really didn't." He said. "Five stars from me."
She laughed as she sung I Want To Break Free to herself, pretending to clean the bowl in the same way as Roger Taylor in the video.
"Well you probably don't need to ask how Ed is now." She said, her eyes fixed on the sponge in her hand. "How's James doing? Better? Worse?"
"About the same really, dripping like a tap and moody as anything." I said. "He wants to watch a film now. Do you think we could all watch one together? Nothing that takes too much watching, just like a Disney film or something."
"I'm down for that!" Ed shouted, sending himself into a coughing fit.
"Stop shouting babe, you'll kill your voice!" Evie shouted back, stifling a laugh.
"Oh, I did manage to find out how he and Ed got unwell." I said suddenly.
I heard Ed laugh suddenly from in the other room, which almost set me off as well.
"Oh yeah, go on." Evie said interestedly. "It was a bit strange don't you think, them both getting ill at the same time and so suddenly?"
Ed couldn't hold himself back anymore and started hysterically laughing into one of the sofa cushions. Evie raised an eyebrow, sensing that he had a part to play in it.
"What happened?" She asked suspiciously.
I explained everything: the cold night in Basingstoke, having missed the train, along with the fact his phone had died, then going on to explain how Ed came into the equation.
"So instead of calling me, the idiot decides to call Ed instead and get him unwell too, which brings us right up to now." I finished. "So basically, my idiot boyfriend was being his usual self and got yours roped into it all because he couldn't be arsed to charge his phone."
"How dare he." Evie simply said, her smile having long faded.
She then walked off and I realised she wasn't best pleased. But with James upstairs already feeling mortified, there was only one thing I could say.
"Are we still down for that movie?"
"Yeah!" Ed answered for her, leaving me with the impression Evie wasn't all that interested anymore.
Sighing at her pettiness, I rushed upstairs to find James.
Evie's POV
"Edward Stephenson Gamble!" I shouted. "How dare you let James Acaster make you ill!"
"I'm sorry Evie, I just wanted to help him." He said, trying to stand up for himself. "He called me feeling so ill and I felt awful for him, I couldn't just leave him at home feeling sorry for himself."
"But now you're ill too!" I shouted, exasperated.
"I'm sorry." He whimpered, his eyes seeming to roll into the back of his head for a moment. "Now please stop shouting, you're upsetting me. And I've got a banging headache."
My face instantly fell and I scooped him up in my arms. "Oh sweetheart, I'm sorry! Come here and have a cuddle...there you go...that's better...don't worry, it's just a cold, it'll be over before you know it..."
He buried his face into my chest as I held him close, feeling my shirt moisten with what I could only assume to be either tears or snot. Equally as unneeded, but on completely different sides of the disgusting scale.
"Sorry." He sniffled. "I just feel like shit and I don't like it."
"Oh Ed honey, I know." I murmured, running my fingers through his soft chestnut hair. "It's alright, it doesn't last forever."
He wrapped his arms around my waist and I made circles on his back with my free hand, allowing him to softly cry into my chest.
"Oh my poor baby, you are really poorly aren't you?" I asked, receiving a small, weak nod. "Well why don't we watch a film with Beth and you and I can cuddle as much as you want."
"What about James?" He asked hoarsely, from both the crying and his awful cold.
"Yes, James too." I said reluctantly. "Once they turn up that is."
Right on queue, Beth and James slowly padded downstairs. She arrived before him, revealing the sorry sight of the ever weak James Acaster: pale, sweaty, shaking and on the verge of collapsing.
"Come on baby, you get laid down." Beth said comfortingly, going to fix him yet another drink.
"You alright mate?" Ed asked, sniffling as I held him in my arms. "You look half dead."
"Speak for yourself." James snapped, not in the best mood. "You've been crying and everything, haven't you? I can tell."
"Maybe just a little." He said scornfully. "I couldn't help it - Evie shouted at me and I just feel rotten."
"I'm sorry sweetheart, I was just upset that someone decided to make you unwell." I said, glaring at James.
"Look, Beth's told you everything." James said. "I called him up and he agreed to help me. If he'd left me hanging, he wouldn't have caught it."
"Well why didn't you call Beth you idiot?!" I snapped. "Getting my boyfriend ill when there was really no reason to!"
Ed suddenly had a brainwave. With how I reacted when he genuinely got upset earlier, surely I wouldn't notice if he piled it on a little bit?
"Guys, please stop." He mumbled. "I've got a headache and I hate seeing you argue."
I instantly stopped and looked into his eyes. He blinked a few times, his eyes running a little from his cold, which helped with the charade.
"Oh love don't worry, we won't!" I promised, kissing his forehead but still glaring at James.
"So you won't listen to reason but you'll listen to your boyfriend?" James asked. "Wow. Just wow."
Suddenly, and right on time too, Beth returned. She placed James's drink on the table and sat herself next to him.
"So, have we picked anything?" She asked.
"Not yet." I said. "I think we should let Ed pick, having been feeling so upset and everything."
"Here we go again, letting your precious little poorly boyfriend Ed do whatever he wants, while I can't even look at you the wrong way and I get the silent treatment!" James shouted. "I say we watch Cool Runnings and that's that!"
"Let Ed pick, James!" I said. "Come on love, whatever you want."
"Well..."
"Don't say a word, Ed!" James interrupted. "You've been really horrible today, do you know that? Every second you've been clinging to Ed like a wet flannel and now you're being petty with me just because Ed found it in his heart to try and help me when I was in the worst state!"
"Well now he's just as bad as you, if not worse!" I snapped.
"Erm, guys-"
"Oh just shut up, Ed!" We both snapped at the same time.
He went silent then, a frown on his face. It was then that Beth took over.
"Right, everyone stop!" She interrupted. "You clearly can't decide between yourselves, so I'm going to pick. We're watching Alice in Wonderland."
"But Beth, I never suggested my choice." Ed said, hoping for a little more sympathy from her.
"Ed, please just shut up." She sighed, leaving him feeling even worse than before.
He cuddled into me, burying his face into my shoulder, and my heart broke almost instantly. We'd upset him, that was clear, and I felt horrendously guilty.
"Aw sweetheart, I'm sorry." I murmured. "Don't worry, we can watch whatever you want afterwards."
I then looked at the other two, still softly stroking Ed's hair. "Look what you've done - you've upset him again now!"
"You snapped at him too!" Both James and Beth yelled.
"Well I'm sorry!" I shouted.
Suddenly we were interrupted by a voice. It was a quiet, weak voice, but a voice nonetheless that didn't seem to care if it burned from the strain. With me, James and Beth midway through shouting at each other, it could only be Ed.
"Look, can everyone please stop shouting at each other?!" He shouted, startling us all. "Beth, I know you've not done anything, but you really hurt my feelings then - I hadn't said a word then and all I was saying was that I wanted to suggest a film for us to watch! James, I understand your point, I really do, and I'm coming onto it, but you keep rising to it and getting angry and making the argument worse! And Evie, oh Evie, I love you, I really do, and you've been a great help to me all day, but you keep undermining everyone! James couldn't help getting ill and he just so happened to call me. I went to help him and I got it off him - it's a virus, it just happens. So please my love, stop being so bitter. I'll be better soon, you yourself have kept telling me that all day."
Nobody spoke, not at first. I suppose we all must've felt guilty. I know I certainly did, having realised that Ed, who was arguably supposed to be on the verge of unconsciousness, had more sense than the lot of us.
"Oh Ed, you're right. You're so, so right." I said, feeling more than a little embarrassed. "I'm sorry everyone, especially to you James. Just...don't do it again I suppose?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry." James mumbled quickly. "Can we just watch the film now?"
"Yes, finally!" Beth exclaimed.
She put on Alice and we all watched as she embarked on her adventures in Wonderland, Ed snuggled close to me and James snuggled close to Beth. We watched in awe as she followed the white rabbit down his rabbit hole, I held onto Ed tightly as Alice cried and created the pool of tears, James watched in confusion as the caucus race began and eventually we all laughed when the comparable duo of Tweedledee and Tweedledum came onscreen.
"Hey, you know who they are like?" Beth asked.
James sighed. "Who?"
"You and Ed!" She laughed, breaking down into hysterical laughter at their faces.
"Oh yeah, but who's who?" I asked.
"Ed's Tweedledee and James is Tweedledum, because-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence, Beth!" James interrupted to no avail.
"Because you slept in a bush in Basingstoke and got a cold, without calling me whatsoever." Beth teased.
"Shut up." He said with a scowl on his face.
We watched the rest of the film, me and Beth still tangled up in our boyfriends' arms. Eventually, the scene started where Alice got lost in the woods with no way home and like every other time I'd watched Alice in Wonderland, I found myself crying a little, right along with her.
"Oh Ed, I am silly aren't I?" I chuckled, sniffling. "Ed my love?"
I looked down to find that he'd fallen asleep on my shoulder. I smiled as I began to stroke his hair, planting a gentle kiss on his burning forehead.
"Beth?" I spoke again, turning to where she laid with James half asleep in her arms.
"Shh!" She whispered, pointing at him. "He's fallen asleep."
I chuckled at this, her own manicured fingers running through his blonde-brown curls. She seemed to be a little tired herself, her eyes growing heavy.
"Tired yourself out?" I asked.
"Yeah." She murmured. "But I suppose it'll be worth it once they're both better."
"Definitely." I agreed. "But I'm willing to come over all week and sit by them day and night until they're better, I care about them that much."
"Me too."
We smiled at each other, then at the boys. Then we watched the rest of the film. At its end, I smiled down at the still sleeping Ed, having not let go of him once throughout the whole thing.
"Beth?" I whispered. "Do you want to watch something else? Peter Pan, perhaps?"
There was no answer.
"Are you still awake?" I asked again, turning to see that she was in fact no longer awake.
She'd fallen asleep, her arms still wrapped around James. I hummed to myself and decided I might as well have a nap too, just to give me strength for when Ed would inevitably need something later on.
Shuffling in the corner of the sofa, I felt something move almost directly underneath me. I felt around and quickly fished out, and I understand I really should've seen this coming, Ed's insulin pen.
I chuckled. "Oh Ed..."
I placed it safely on the table and finally got comfortable, the sounds of Ed, James and Beth's soft breathing eventually sending me off to sleep. I dreamed then of amusing things, but I only had one hope in my mind. I hoped, desperately, that Ed and James would be better soon and we'd be able to get back to our usual antics, the boys' humour giving us lots of laughs along the way.