Chapter Text
It wasn't always like this. There were calm days when she didn't have the urge to crawl out of her own skin. Yes, she had good ones, but those did not erase the many bad days she had in her life. Every shift breaks her a little more each time.
She does like- or rather love- the challenges her workday usually brings. Yet in all the chaos, noises, and new experiences, her trauma manages to crawl back out. Out of the dark places where she tries to hide it but ultimately fails.
Today has been such a day, when no matter what she tried, the voices in her head grew louder and she became snappy towards everyone. She hated when she began acting shitty towards people she actually cared about. It started before she had even left the apartment with Dennis. She had a nightmare, which left her breathless and without any real memories of it.
The minute she woke up, she knew this day wasn’t going to end well.
Breakfast was also a nightmare, as Dennis had one of his guilt flare-ups, and only thought of cooking for Trinity and not himself. He often tried to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal, but she recognized the signs. He hated eating in front of her, but only when they were in the apartment.
At first, she thought that he’d developed an eating disorder right under her nose, but after a while of living and working together, she realized that he was just stupid. It was no secret that he hated being in her debt, although she clarified multiple times that he didn’t own her anything. Not eating in the apartment was a way of him to subdide his own guilt. No matter how many times she scolded him for that, it never changed, which is why she just accepted his weirdness and moved on.
But today was sadly not one of those typical days, which is why his usual behavior triggered her and made her snap at him. She didn’t mean to be a total bitch towards him, but she couldn’t stop herself. After her small outburst, where she called him an idiot and some other words in Tagalog, she managed to calm herself down.
Apologies were never her strong suit though, which was why her way of making it better was to prepare a coffee to go for him instead. After living for a while together, Dennis managed to decipher her sometimes strange behavior and started to read her well.
The first major crisis was kind of averted, yet when they stepped foot in the hospital, the next one stumbled right into them. The waiting room was as busy as always, with many patients from the night who hadn’t been discharged or even taken in yet still roaming around.
Well, one of them, a clearly drunk, tall guy, was apparently pissed that he had to wait so long and when he saw the two employees walking inside, decided to let his frustration out on them. Huckleberry was walking ahead of her, eager as always to start a new day in the ER, while Santos trudged behind him. She was assessing the many people in the waiting room and didn’t realize that a guy was approaching them. The said man managed to catch her attention when he unceremoniously stumbled in front of Dennis.
God, she wasn’t in the mood for annoying patients before her shift had even officially begun. Before they could de-escalate a possible situation, the guy managed to grab Whitaker by his shoulders.
“Do y’a h’ve any fucking idea how fucki’ long I am waitin’? It’s been like hours’!” screamed John- that’s how Santos had at least named him- while shaking him as if he weighed nothing. And although Dennis tried to squirm out of the patient’s tight grasp, the man was too strong and stubborn to let him go. And before she or the security could react, John moved his right hand away from Dennis’s shoulder and let it fall down to his ass. What the fuck-
There was no way that her best friend was getting assaulted right in front of her. And although she had so much anger coursing through her body, she couldn’t move. It was as if she was back there- no. concentrate, deep breaths. It’s in the past. He is in prison. You are in the Hospital. You are safe. You are not the one in danger.
She managed to snap herself out of her inner turmoil just in time to see security snatch the man away from Dennis and onto the floor. And her friend? He basically sagged into himself. And Trinity was by his side in two strides. Grabbing him by his arm, she managed to drag him inside the ER, away from the comotion and into the locker room. They were now alone, and Dennis let himself fall onto the floor.
What was she supposed to do now? After thinking for a whole second, the woman plopped herself right next to her friend and hugged him sideways. They stayed in this rather awkward embrace for a short while before Huckleberry basically shook the tension from his body and slowly stood up.
“Thanks Trin. I don’t know why it shook me like that. We better get going though. Our shift is about to start,” muttered her roommate, while slowly walking towards the door. And Trinity? She was left stunned. Why was he reacting so normally? And she, on the other hand, couldn’t get her heart to stop missing every other beat.
Anger started to rise again, making her chest feel hot and tight. God fucking dammit, she was truly pathetic. Those were the moments when the urge to get back to her old companion grew louder and louder. Her thigh started to ache, the psychosomatic pain from her old cuts flaring up.
Breathe, Trinity. Just breathe. The day hadn’t even officially started yet, and she was already this riled up. Oh, how she missed her bed, with Garcia next to her. Those small moments in the morning, before the worry of the world got to her, when she could just bask in the comfort of the woman she lov-.
Pause.
What?
Love?
No way.