Chapter Text
Students cheered as they left the school, excited for the summer holidays they were more than ready to sleep through, or cause havoc with their friends through, depending on the student in question.
One more year until high school was truly over. One more year until they climb into adulthood, for real this time.
They would finally be the mature ones, the true role models.
They would be responsible for more than just homework - some would go into full-time work, some would start families, some might stay kids for a little longer despite the pressure to grow up.
Sieun wasn’t worrying.
He was organised, and prepared, and intelligent both academically and socially.
He could speak to people, he didn’t stutter, he bought groceries when his mother was out, and studied harder than most of the students in his school.
He was ready.
He had decided that years ago.
When he was isolated, solitary, a calm presence that stayed alert in both the storms around him and the sea of his own mind.
The barriers he built have protected him his whole life. But the crashing waves, waterfalls, even the simplest of streams, it all eroded the exterior he had built with dedication and acknowledgement of his parents’ desires and expectations.
He was left stranded at sea, a stack of material surrounded by the elements around him. The persistent, consistent solidity of the earth, the gentle but biting presence of the air, the scalding, but brave, powerful heat of the sun.
The people who got through to him.
The path he travels feels unfamiliar, as if he changed his direction without realising it. The ground was softer now, and it caves in as he steps further, but it feels comfortable now, less restricted.
His feet falter, and his mind strays as he slips in and out of focus, the world blurring around him but his presence as clear as it has always been.
He was seen as wild, but extraordinary. He was smart, and he was a quick thinker, never made mistakes. The school knew of his actions, knew what he had done. None of them knew the truth about Ahn Suho, they just knew what they were told was reality, and Sieun didn’t care enough to correct them.
His eyes cleared again, for a moment. Humin was chatting to the others exaggeratedly, Juntae and Hyeontak looked just about done with life, but they were smiling at their lively friend.
He was vaguely aware of the direction they were headed. The pavement was natural beneath his feet, the pathway leading to a local cafe the others liked going to.
He allows his feet to follow, even if he’s not truly present, because he knows he should spend time with the people around him, they’re his friends after all. They practically begged for him to join them during lunch that day, and he hadn’t exactly declined so they made assumptions.
Calculated assumptions, but assumptions nonetheless.
He heard a sharp ding above him and finally looked up at the location. The squad walked through the doors to the neutral toned cafe, one that you would see on those aesthetic “day in the life” videos on social media.
They sat in a booth, Juntae beside Sieun, Hyeontak and Sieun facing each other on the side of the benches that was easiest to escape from.
Humin pressed his elbows against the table as he leaned forward slightly, shifting his weight onto his crossed arms. He took a deep breath, and glanced around at the three of them as if to get their undivided attention.
“I got invited to a party tomorrow by some boys in our year, what do you guys think about going?” He shared the news like it was a secret, like he was passing around the strongest drugs around and he didn’t want some plain old citizen listening in.
A big grin spread across his face and he leaned back against the wall of the booth with a stretch and a roll of his shoulders.
“The people that know have been talking all about it! I’ve heard whispers around the hallways, theres gonna be banger music, alcohol, snacks, lighting- even a swimming pool! Like in the American high school movies!! Trust me, this will be peak af!”
“With reasoning like that you may as well be a sheep” Sieun muttered, glaring across at Humin.
“Huh?”
“He said you’re a sheep.” Hyeontak repeated for him with a shit-eating grin, elbowing Humin in the side lightly. Humin went silent for a moment in thought.
“Ehh I’m not a member of the pack, I’m totally more of an alpha,” he chuckled after that word, of course he did, “that’s why you guys are gonna follow my lead and go to the party right?”
“The only organism willing to follow you around would be bacteria.” Hyeontak muttered. “Also, there are no alphas in sheep, and a group is a herd not a pack.”
“Or a flock” Juntae supplied helpfully, though he seemed as if he wanted to say more, maybe about the implication that the three of them would be considered bacteria if Hyeontak’s statement were true.
“Huh?” Humin muttered. “But how would -like- a sofa-“
“That’s interior, idiot. Bacteria is —like— germs!” Hyuntak sighed exasperatedly as he slammed his head into his hands, which were propped up by his arms already resting on the table.
Humin laughed loudly but paused only a moment later.
“Wait, ‘heard’? I’m not deaf though-“
“For fuck’s sake Baku- wrong herd!” Hyuntak exclaimed through the muffling of his palms against his mouth.
Sieun huffed a breath, almost a laugh, but definitely closer to a tired sigh.
———
They were at the party.
For some reason.
Sieun’s hand was clutched around a plastic cup of water, just barely not scrunching the fragile material. The cup was half empty from the small sips Sieun took whenever someone decided to try strike up a conversation with him.
Ignorance scared people away; someone as dry and unbothered as him wasn’t interesting to drunk teens — which meant his experiment was working and his hypothesis was being proven more correct by the second.
Hyeontak had stumbled over a few moments prior, muttering about shots and cocktails he was forced to try. Sieun was trying to ignore him, but he kept trying to get his attention with nicknames and gentle touches.
He was currently stretched far into the sofa beside Sieun, leaning slightly towards him in a way that left his hand lightly brushing against Sieun’s knee no matter how much he tried to squeeze himself into the side of the sofa.
Sieun sighed quietly, exasperatedly, and lifted Hyeontak’s sunken head up with two of his fingers.
“Open your mouth.” He commanded just loud enough for Hyeontak to hear over the booming music and shouting people.
“You good bro?” Hyeontak muttered up at him, opening his mouth anyway.
Sieun slid the cup towards Hyeontak’s lips and slowly lifted it, allowing water to pour into the boy’s mouth.
Hyeontak coughed lightly after finishing and sat up a little straighter in a way that barely made him look any more sober.
“Thanks man, really needed something safe— you wouldn’t believe the concoctions Baku and the others were making me try!” He exclaimed, the words extremely loud from where they were placed directly beside Sieun’s ear.
Sieun nodded calmly, then gently nudged Hyeontak away so he wasn’t so close.
Hyeontak looked at him with a wobbly grin and tired eyes, his exhaustion only noticeable in the fine details that couldn’t be altered by exceedingly large amounts of alcohol.
Sieun sighed for what seemed to be the millionth time of the night.
“Let’s get you home.” He muttered, more to himself than the drunken man. He had found his excuse to leave the thick, tobacco-scented air and horny teens.
Sieun dropped the cup somewhere near the table on the other side of him before grabbing Hyeontak’s arm and pulling the two of them up.
“Geez man, take me out on a date first…” Hyeontak spoke lazily as Sieun dragged the two of them towards the door.
The door opened easily, and the clean air hit the two of them with a refreshing kick.
“Huh… we ain’t staying for longer?” Hyeontak looked…sad, regretful, with a small ounce of…relief maybe? It was hard to tell with the mock scowl on his face.
The door shut behind them and Sieun closed his eyes for a moment to help push away the deep headache formed from the excessive lights and sound. He pinched the bridge of his nose, tired and ultimately pissed at how much this night sucked for a guy like him.
“Hey uhh Sieun?” Hyeontak muttered, fear laced between words. Sieun opened his eyes and glanced over at the boy, who had his cheeks puffed and a slight green undertone to his skin.
In a quick movement he wrapped his arms around Hyeontak’s waist and faced him towards the grass beside them only a moment before he vomited most of what he had eaten recently.
He took a tissue from the pack in his hoodie pocket and passed it to the still-sickly boy without a glance, just the smell made him queasy. Hyeontak took it with a grateful smile, from what Sieun could see from the corners of his vision.
“Yeah, you’re going home.”
“But I feel better now! I could drink 10 more shots for real!” Hyeontak exclaimed before consequentially throwing up once more from the motion.
Sieun sighed.
Again.