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Gi-hun took a step backwards. Then another. A shaky breath left his lips and his whole body trembled against the cold metal that was burning his palm. He loosened his grip and took a scared look at it, as if he was hoping that it was just an illusion. But the knife was real. In his hands. Clean.
He didn't know why he hesitated, why he even considered at all. The more he thought about it, the more he felt like nothing he saw was real, like it was all just an illusion created to confuse him.
A loud inhale, and his vision cleared a little, him searching for the baby with his eyes. Exhale. She was fine, sleeping peacefully, unaware of everything. Gi-hun relaxed and carefully walked towards the cradle, a tired smile curving his lips as he glanced at the baby's round face. He put one of his hands on the border and squeezed the knife in the other one.
Maybe that bastard was right. He should kill everyone, take her, and leave. He remembered why he considered, why he pushed himself this far.
But he couldn't. No matter how hard he rationalized the thought of killing the so-called trash, he just couldn't.
"Player four hundred fifty six," a mechanic voice tickled his ears and he turned over to face the pink square-faced soldier. "Please, hand over the knife and come with me."
"Oh, so you could do it yourself?" Gi-hun laughed at the absurdity of the situation.
"We are not allowed to harm the players unprompted." The soldier extended their hand. "Hand over the knife and follow."
"No." He backed away, closing the distance between him and the wall.
The soldier visibly sighed, then grabbed the walkie talkie from their belt and commanded something barely audible into it. A few other pink-suited soldiers – this time triangle-faced – broke into the room almost immediately and approached Gi-hun, who quickly took on a fighting stance and extended the knife as if it would save him.
After a round of kicking, screaming, attempting to bite, and punching, Gi-hun was defeated and was now only pouting as two of the soldiers dragged him across the room to the elevator.
The heavy gold embedded doors opened and Gi-hun was thrown into the dark hall, now painnfully familiar to him. He stumbled forward. Before he could turn back and even think of getting back to the elevator, its doors closed. A few quiet swears whispered on his lips and he glanced at the other end of the corridor.
In-ho sat in his chair unmasked, hand in another hand resting on his knees. A single hair strand fell on his forehead. He stared back at Gi-hun and let the silence dread in the air for a couple of seconds before tearing it, "Why don't you come closer? I'm unarmed."
Gi-hun frowned. Then he smiled sarcastically. His fists clenched and he took a deep breath, a steamy feeling spreading across his chest."Do you still expect me to trust a single word coming out of your mouth?" He wanted every word to poison, to inflict pain, to tear the man in front of him. The mere image of him was unbearable.
In-ho blinked and averted his gaze, as if in shame.
"If I wanted to harm you, I would've ordered so by now. But I have no such intentions. Gi-hun," he explained quietly, rubbing his palms against each other, "I just want to help you."
"Oh yeah? Well you've helped enough," Gi-hun spat out, his body so tense it was almost hard to speak. He wanted no favors, not from him. "I want to leave."
"M-m-m," In-ho hummed out, tapping his fingers on the table and pursing his lips. Then he finally looked at Gi-hun again and shook his head slightly, "Not yet."
Gi-hun felt his eye twich as he took a deep breath. "What do you want from me? You liar, you fucking liar, you…" Words just slipped out of his mouth, flowing like water, "You know, I trusted you. I grieved you… That version of you. What was your goal? What do you want?" He breathed heavily. "What do you want from me?" He whispered, his voice on the edge of turning into a crying one.
"Done?" In-ho asked, tilting his head.
"I am done!" Gi-hun bursted, putting his hands in the air. "I'm done with everything!" He chanted before turning on his heels and heading to the elevator, each step echoing through the hall.
"Wait," In-ho stood up from his chair. "I want to keep you safe."
Gi-hun stopped.
In-ho circled the table and called out, "Don't go back to the game, stay here, and then…" He held his breath, building up the courage to say what he wants to out loud, "Be mine."
Gi-hun turned back, facing him, and took quick, heavy steps. Before In-ho could understand what was happening, he found himself being held by his collar, Gi-hun's face suddenly right on front of his own. He squinted and ran his eyes over him, paying zero attention to the way his heels went up in the air just a little bit.
"You…" Gi-hun whispered through clenched teeth. "Yours?"
In-ho stared directly in his eyes, a barely noticeable smirk appearing on his lips. Then he nodded, "Safe and sound."
Gi-hun stared back at him, his mouth opened slightly, his lower lip trembling, sweat rolling down his temple. He tried to mutter something, but the words got stuck in his throat. He frowned so hard his eyebrows stared to hurt.
Then he sighed and pushed In-ho away, letting him go.
In-ho stumbled backwards, catching himself on his feet. He fixed his coat and his fair, his eyes not leaving Gi-hun this whole time.
Gi-hun stood still and breathed hard. "I won't give you what you want," he finally managed to say. "You can go fuck yourself, Young-il," his voice trembled.
Just when he was about to turn back and head to the elevator, he felt In-ho grabbing his wrist and squeezing it – perhaps, a bit too strong. He searched for an answer in In-ho's face, but couldn't find one.
"If you go away, you will die," In-ho stated in a hurry. Feeling Gi-hun trying to break free of his grip, he winced and raised his voice at him, "You won't win the game! Wake up, listen!"
But Gi-hun didn't want to listen. "Let me go!" He cried out, putting all his might into setting his hand free.
Instead, before he could blink, he found himself on the floor with his arm twisted behind him and In-ho's knee pressing on his back.
"Sorry, but I can't let you die," In-ho explained, his tone on the edge of being angry.
"Oh, so you didn't lie about being a cop!" Gi-hun yelled back the moment adrenaline washed off. "Let me– Maybe I want to die!" He squirmed under him, "Fuck off!"
"You have the right to remain silent," In-ho asserted, taking handcuffs out of his pocket with his free hand. To the tune of Gi-hun's protests he quickly wrapped them around his wrists and clicked them shut.
He stood up and approached the counter next to one of the walls of the room. Gi-hun twisted around, allowing himslef to lurk at what he is doing over there. At first he couldn't understand what it was, but when In-ho turned and started aprroaching him with a white cloth in his hand, it clicked in his mind.
"Oh hell no!" He blasted out, "You are not– No!"
Gi-hun tried his best to stand up, but with his hands cuffed behind his back, it was hard – espescially with what state of health he was in.
In-ho walked over to him and stopped right beneath. He pursed his lips and observed Gi-hun for a couple of seconds. The latter was still trying to escape, hurriedly turning over and attempting to crawl away. In-ho sighed and grabbed him by his hair from the back, getting down on one knee and thus squeezing Gi-hun between himself and the floor. Gi-hun squeaked, then cried out loud. He kept protesting even as In-ho placed the cloth pressed to his nose and mouth.
"I'm just protecting you," In-ho murmured in his ear, not letting go in the slightest. They stayed like this for a good couple of minutes, Gi-hun not giving up on resisting, but his movements slowly but surely got weaker and weaker until he fell numb in In-ho's hands.
***
Gi-hun opened his eyes to the sound of someone crying. A second later, he recognized that this was the baby's voice, and almost jumped out of bed – though, he discovered he is handcuffed to the bed frame by his left hand, and thus unable to move further.
The door opened. He heard someone approach him, steps light but confident. Cursing everything that led him to this, he directed his eyes there and met exactly who he thought he would.
"Well, hello," In-ho tried starting the conversation.
Gi-hun looked away and stayed silent for a while before the baby let out yet another cry. "Why is she crying?" he immediately asked in a demanding tone.
"Babies cry all the time, you should know that," In-ho answered without much enthusiasm.
Gi-hun glared at the tiny cradle painted with flowers, and felt a strong pinch of helplessness get deeper and deeper under his skin with his every breath. Eyes focused on the baby, he slowly shifted towards her.
The motion didn't go unnoticed by In-ho. "Do you want to hold it?" he pointed with his head.
"Why?"
"Well, you two should get used to each other."
"What does that mean?" Gi-hun scoffed.
In-ho shrugged. "I'll take that as a yes," he said as he took the baby out of her cradle with a gentleness Gi-hun wasn't expecting from him.
Still wary, he carefully received her in his arms and swapped her baby hairs to the side. For a few moments he adored her cute baby face, caressing her cheeks with tenderness. Bittersweet memories of him holding Gayeong the same way flooded his mind and he smiled sadly. The baby calmed down and was now peacefully lying in his hands.
"Perhaps she was just craving attention," In-ho spoke in a soft voice.
That ignited something in Gi-hun. "Yeah, cause you've killed her mother who would give her the attention," he snapped back.
"Oh, come on." In-ho rolled his eyes. "She jumped herself."
"Well, whatever helps you sleep at night." Gi-hun asserted and shrugged in a demonstrative manner.
In-ho scoffed and frowned. "How am I wrong?"
"I don't expect you to understand," Gi-hun dismissed, not willing to engage in the conversation any further. He changed the topic, "The baby needs someone to look after her."
In-ho ran his eyes up and down him. "You seem to handle it well enough."
Gi-hun wanted to object, but something stopped him. He was, indeed, handling it well enough.
"What do you want to name her?"
"What?"
"Well, we can't keep referring to her as the baby, you know."
Gi-hun pursed his lips. He hated how In-ho was right this time. A short sigh escaped his lips and he lowered his eyes to look at the baby, trying to find a name that would suit her.
"Eun-seo," he finally murmured out, "I think it suits her."
In-ho hummed, pursing his lips. Then he responded, "I don't like that name. Choose another one"
Gi-hun frowned and opened his mouth to respond, but was too flabbergasted to even get out a single word. "And," He finally managed to voice, "what gives you the thought you have a say in this?"
"I supposed we were in this together, no?" In-ho asked, tilting his head.
"Toge– No?!"
"Your choice." He shrugged. "But it could've been worse if you think about it, hm?"
Gi-hun didn't answer. He listened to Eun-seo cry, and wondered what might be disturbing her.
"She's hungry," he stated after sitting in silence for a minute. "Feed her," he demanded.
In-ho smiled. "I'm glad you trust me enough."
Gi-hun gave him a dirty look as he handed the baby to him, not without hesitation.
"I would've done it myself, if I could, don't get it all twisted…"
In-ho chuckled and shook his head. He slowly approached the door, then turned to say goodbye.
"Sure. Make yourself comfortable, dear."
"Can't do that chained to the bed, you know."
"That's too bad. Until I see that you won't harm yourself or anyone around you, I'm keeping you handcuffed. Good night."
In-ho quietly closed the door behind himself and Gi-hun was left alone for the first time in what felt like forever. He sighed and slowly adjusted himself to lay down. The pillow was surprisingly soft, and the chain on his handcuffs was, to his surprise, long enough to move around bed freely.
Gi-hun frowned. How dared he try to convince himself that this wasn't bad? He would rather sleep on the street than in this bed – that's what he told himself over and over again, anger rushing though his veins. Squeezing his eyes, he quietly growled at how awful everything felt. Memories, countless memories overflowed his head, but it didn't feel nostalgic. It felt painful in a way he wished he never knew. Tightness wrapped around his chest, making him wince. His body was tired, and so was his mind. He didn't know for how much longer he could keep pushing through it.
Sooner than he wanted to admit, he was deep in his sleep.
Morning came fast.
Gi-hun woke from his sleep and for a good couple of seconds hesitated to open his eyes. A naive hope that the last few days were just a long dream still lingered inside of him. As if there was a chance he could see his own bedroom if he opened his eyes right now.
But he didn't – in front of him was the ceiling he already grew hateful towards. Swearing under his breath, he sat upright and rubbed his face.
On the bedside table that he just noticed, stood a tray with two egg sandwiches and a cup of coffee. Gi-hun felt guilt settle in his stomach, but he was too hungry not to ignore it. He reached out for the mug and grabbed it, but immediately flinched back – it was hotter than he expected it to be, almost freshly brewed. On his second try he held it properly, by it's handle, and carefully sipped his favorite drink. It was sugared exactly like he liked it too, which felt nice enough to cover up for how unsettling that was.
He bitterly noticed that the cuffs weren't really restricting him at all – he could freely use his second hand and even move around the bed. Just to try them, he banged the cuff on the bedframe, but it stayed tight against his wrist. He sighed and went on with his breakfast.
Once it was over, the heavy feeling of guilt made it's return. He shouldn't have accepted the obvious bait, shouldn't have enjoyed it. He hasn't eaten anything for quite a time, could've endured for a bit longer; he question was for how long will he would have to.
As if answering that, the door clicked. Gi-hun frowned at seeing it was In-ho who entered through it.
"Listen," this time he started the conversation first, "Just because I comply, doesn't mean I'm enjoying this bullshit."
"Good morning to you too," In-ho smiled.
"Is everything a fucking joke to you?" Gi-hun exploded, "What is this? Let me free."
In-ho tilted his head. "But… Why? Isn't this everything you wanted?"
"What?"
"The execution might be a bit off, but think about it." In-ho articulated. "You found the runner of the games, didn't you?"
Gi-hun laughed with irony. "Oh, so I should be happy?"
In-ho shrugged. "I don't see why not."
Gi-hun just stared at him blankly.
"Come on." In-ho smiled, taking a step closer. "I promise you it's not as bad as you're making it out to be."
"Promise? Don't piss me off," Gi-hun scoffed.
In-ho seemed offended. "What, when have I lied to you?"
"I don't know, Young-il, when did you?"
"Ah, right. Uhm, except for the name…" He spoke with a tint of shame to his voice, and then added apologetically, "I kept my word that you and the baby will make it out of the games alive, right?"
"So the name was fake too," Gi-hun was stunned. "Wow. You know even Il-nam didn't lie about that?"
"Well, that's on him. I'm telling you now, my–"
"No," Gi-hun cut him off. "I don't care what your name is."
The silent tension wrenched the room, Gi-hun and In-ho staring each other down.
In-ho shook his head sadly. "You're not reaching anywhere with that attitude." He took a few steps back to the door.
"What?"
"I'll let you think about your behavior."
"I am not your fucking pet! Hey!? Where are you going?"
"You'll see Eun-seo when you deserve it," In-ho stated, his voice hurt, before shutting the door closed. Gi-hun shouted a few more insults at him before growling and throwing himself on the bed.
Great.
He somehow just made his situation even worse than it was before.
The more he thought about it, the more irritated he became. He kept trying to come up with a solution yet nothing plausible came to his mind. It has started to come to his realization that escape was impossible.
"Well, maybe I should just kill myself!" He shouted out, assuming that "Young-il" would be listening. But he knew those were empty words – there was absolutely nothing in proximity to him that he could use to seriously harm himself.
He felt like that was done on purpose. Even the mug was metal, meaning he couldn't break it and cut himself with the fragments. Everything was thought of to such an extent Gi-hun couldn't help but admire that just a tiny bit.
Maybe "Young-il" actually cared.
Maybe he didn't lie. Not this time.
Gi-hun let that thought sit in the back of his head for a while.
He didn't know how much time has passed before he fell asleep. But when he woke up this time, there was no breakfast for him and the tray from the previous one was gone.
He had no idea what to do with all the spare time he had now. Thinking about his life only sufficed him for a while, but there was a whole day in front of him. Trying to fall asleep also didn't cut it – he couldn't no matter how hard he tried.
So he just stared at the wall for a while.
He felt scared. More than that, insanely bored.
Alas, there was nothing he could do.
Gi-hun didn't know how much time has passed since then, but he assumed at least a couple of days have.
No one has entered the room ever since. Only once has a glass of water and a plain piece of bread has appeared on the bedside table, but eating that made him nauseous for hours. Starving would be preferable, he decided.
It would also be a bit easier if he could keep track of time or at least have a sleep schedule. But he found falling asleep to be harder than usual, mostly because the lights wouldn't turn off – he saw the switch right next to the door, but it was too far away for him to reach it. Instead, he just had to wait until his mind gave up and he passed out to get the rest he craved.
After a while of doing nothing, his head began to spin. Even when staying still, he felt the room wobble. In hopes that it will make feel him better, he finished the very little of water that he decided to preserve just in case, but to no avail. His mind has gone blank and his body felt hot.
"Young-il..?" He tried to call for help, but just like the previous times, no one answered.
Seeing that as the only choice left, he forced himself to fall asleep again.
For a first time in a while, he saw a nightmare that wasn't a certain scenario, but rather some kind of abstraction. Still, he woke up with just as an unpleasant taste in his mouth.
He sat up in his bed and looked around. The glass was gone. A sigh left his lips and he ran his hand through his hair.
Now there was a lot of time for him to think about pretty much everything.
He started thinking that perhaps he was too stubborn. That there was nothing to complain about, and he just had to put on an attitude and ruin it all. That he should apologize to his savior.
Though, there wasn't much he could do for that; no answer came to his cries, so he eventually gave up on trying to communicate. He just stretched over the bed, letting all kinds of thoughts run through his head. Eventually he started falling and out of sleep, too tired to keep up with reality.
For a mere second, he almost saw someone enter the room and jumped upright. But it seemed like he was mistaken. Only a refreshed glass of water occurred on the table.
He immediately clinged onto it, heart racing. That meant he would eventually be forgiven. Maybe there would even be an end to the suffering. Thirsty, he chugged it down and threw himself back on the bed.
It was nice to finally feel good again. He let himself linger in the feeling for as long as possible, and soon enough, he wandered off.
He dreamed of something bright and distant, his mind grasping the crumbles of the sought-after peace. Lately all he was getting was nightmares so it felt refreshing in a way, though overstimulating.
He woke up feeling hot again, and his whole body ached even worse now. Weakness paralyzed his body, all of his senses screaming to him. Not even bothering to sit up, he tried to lay down as still as possible, ignoring the imaginary flames eat his flesh with no mercy.
Finally, he fell back asleep. This time the dream was even brighter, and somehow, he could feel his eyes hurting even in his sleep.
A sudden touch of an eerily cold hand brought him back to the reality. Gi-hun hazily looked at the face in front of him, still adjusting to being awake, and sighed in relief.
"You've been calling me for all these days," In-ho almost whispered, caressing Gi-hun's face, "But I told you that Young-il isn't my name."
"I have," Gi-hun nodded, his body still shivering, "Then what's your name?"
In-ho landed a light kiss on his forehead, then leaned in closer and hummed in his ear, "It's Hwang In-ho. Makes you recall anything?"
"Hmm," Gi-hun hummed in response, "Your brother was really worried about finding you…"
"Good." In-ho got up to walk away, but Gi-hun caught him by his hand.
He pleaded, "Wait… Say that again…"
In-ho chuckled. "What, do you want me to tell you how good you are?" He placed his other palm over Gi-hun's crotch. The latter whimpered in response and quickly nodded. "Do you also want me to help you with that?" He teased, rubbing the bulge with his fingers.
"P-please," Gi-hun managed to mumble, not being able to focus on anything but the way heat rushed to his abdomen, circling around and making him feel lightheaded. He pulled on In-ho's sleeve and pursed his lips, begging for him to take action.
"But what have you done to deserve it?" In-ho brought his hand up and held Gi-hun's face in it.
Gi-hun whimpered, "I'm sorry."
"And what should you say?"
"Thank you…"
In-ho grabbed Gi-hun's pants by their belt and pulled them down. "Come on. You need to stand up, so I can get them off," he demanded in a soft voice.
Gi-hun listened, and soon he was left half-naked on the verge of the bed. He didn't really get why that was happening, but he went along with everything lest he does something wrong again. Besides, he had to admit, it felt strangely good.
In-ho treated his inner thighs gently, feeling blood rush down there. He whispered something sweet and barely audible in between of each kiss. His hands thoroughly massaged the calves, making sure all the tension goes away.
Right before getting to finally satisfy the mutual craving, he looked up and muttered, "Everything I do, I do because I love you." He left a tender kiss on Gi-hun's penis, then looked him in the eyes again. "Never forget that, okay?"
Gi-hun nodded, his cheeks flustered.
In-ho smiled at him and opened his mouth, taking Gi-hun in one slow, deliberate motion. He moved to the tune of his quiet moans, leisurely drawing circles over his curves. His hands traveled all the way up Gi-hun's legs, now grabbing his thighs and pushing them apart.
He felt victorious, becoming more and more passionate with every stroke. In a long-awaited pleasure, his body relaxed and all thoughts conveniently left his mind. Only Gi-hun existed for him in the moment. His lips delicately followed his tongue, caressing the tender skin in different patterns. Swallowing all the excess saliva, he savoured it. Gi-hun tasted like pears, black pepper, burnt plastic and old wood. He also smelled like sea, textile, and cheap cigarettes.
The room has started to felt hot to both of them, and In-ho reached to untie the coat he had on. Gi-hun breathed heavily. He never expected for this to feel so amazing, to ever earn something so sweet. Arching his back, he let out another shaky moan. His hand instinctively went to grab In-ho by his hair, pulling him even closer. In-ho stopped by a second and brought his gaze up, meeting Gi-hun's eyes, but then continued with more drive than ever.
Gi-hun inhaled loudly and subtly moved his hips back and forth, matching In-ho's pace. His mind felt fuzzy, his vision blurry, he could only focus on his overwhelmed senses.
Right when he was about to climax, In-ho stopped. Gi-hun almost gasped in surprise. He ran his eyes all over In-ho's face, but couldn't find an answer there.
"I'm not letting you come like that," he said, short of breath.
Gi-hun murmured something in response, but In-ho was already getting up from his knees. He pushed Gi-hun, who fell on his back, and swiftly unzipped his own pants. Not wasting another second, he towered over him, and generously licked his fingers before impatiently probbing Gi-hun's anus with them. It stretched pretty well, which was satisfactory.
"Look at you, such a good boy," In-ho murmured, feeling a shiver go through Gi-hun's body, "So ready to take me."
"P-please," only managed to whine Gi-hun.
In-ho didn't make him repeat himself. He once again resorted to his own spit, thoroughly enveloping his cock and Gi-hun's butthole with it. When the quick preparation was done, he entered him with ease. One gentle thrust after another, he carefully quickened the tempo, quietly groaning into Gi-hun's neck.
Gi-hun lasted only a few moments under such circumstances. His blood rushed to his skin, and a concentrate of tension mixed with a fuzzy pleasure spreaded from his abdomen to his toes. Curling his legs around In-ho and arching in his shoulders, he went out of breath for a couple of seconds. His cum spilled all over his stomach, down to the bedsheets.
In-ho felt the quivering underneath him and exhaled loudly. Landing a passionate kiss on Gi-hun's neck, he began to move even faster.
"Wa-ait," Gi-hun moaned out, overstimulated, "Stop," he managed to cry before his voice was muffled by In-ho's lips fervently pressing into his. He reciprocated, but reluctantly, their salivas mixing as In-ho's tongue dominated his mouth.
Gi-hun felt as In-ho's hand traveled all the way up to his neck, enfolding his throat. Mouth still busy with the kiss, he only managed to let out a squeak. His whole body turned hot, and he felt the pressure build up in his temples. Though, unexpectedly to him, he found the feeling to be rather pleasant. Maybe it wasn't too bad, after all.
In-ho's upper body relaxed and finished inside of him. Immediately folding into his embrace, he snuggled up with him. Gi-hun took a deep breath of relief and continued breathing heavily, recovering.
"You know," In-ho spoke in a low voice, "Now that we're a family, maybe I'll let you stay in a prettier room."
"That'd be nice," Gi-hun only managed to whisper.
"And you must have missed our daughter, hm?"
"Eun-seo…" Gi-hun muttered, "Our daughter?"
In-ho chuckled. "I mean, technically she is."
Gi-hun stayed silent for a while. "That's tue," he finally answered, though sounding unsure.
"All that tea must've made you real sleepy. But you were so tense and had to relax," In-ho sighed.
"Tea..?" Gi-hun felt confused. "I only remember water."
"What? Of course, i brought you mixtures for your sleep." In-ho shook his head. "It's weird you don't remember."
Gi-hun tried to remember what he was doing for the last couple of days, but no legible memories came up. Perhaps he wasn't in the right headspace.
"Sorry, I think my mind is a mess now," he said quietly and sniffled.
"It's fine." In-ho reached out to pat him on his head. "Now that you're mine, you're safe and sound. Remember that."