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I’m pacing in my room. It's been six days since Draithus and I’ve been rotting in my bed for five. I almost burn out, I know, but staying still and recovering, moving only to the bathing chambers and back to the bed only makes the events of that day repeat over again in my memories.
Every venin, every wyvern, every loss. The feeling of my body burning from the inside as I reached the limit, Chradh screaming at me to stop.
Her face when I found her with Quinn in her arms. The way she looked at me like she was ready to let go, to cease existing. The last pull of strength I managed to let out to get her to safety, because the idea of losing her too was too much to bear.
Finding out my two best friends were now what we swore to fight against. Making that dangerous plan, continuing to walk around the continent like I wasn’t at my limit. Imogen having to erase my memory and the other’s.
Imogen. She is the only one that carries most of the truth. And she has to deal with it all alone. The idea of her suffering in silence just because it’s the right thing to do makes my heart tremble inside my chest. Ever since Brennan ordered me to not move from my bed until I'm cleared by the healers I couldn’t get to see her. I don’t know how she is, how she’s feeling. I miss her.
I need her, and I’m tired of pretending I don’t.
Just as I’m about to give up and throw myself into bed again, I hear a knock on my door. I swear to Dunne that if Brennan is here to order me around this late at night I’m-
But it’s not Brennan, or any of his officers, who I find when I open the door.
“Imogen.” She’s suffering, she’s not breathing fine, she’s not fine. I can’t help but worry. What happened to her? Did someone hurt her? Her teary eyes find mine, and I feel my heart clench. “I didn’t know where else to go.” She cries, and her voice, broken, shaking, breathless… I want nothing more than to take whatever is making her suffer and throw it far away.
I wrap my arms around her, pulling her into my chest, cradling her head against where she can feel my heartbeat. I pull us into the room, closing the door behind me to then wrap my arms tighter around her, one around her waist to pull her closer, my other hand tangling into her hair. I can feel the scratch marks on her scalp, feel the way she hurt herself before not being able to handle it anymore. “It’s okay, Im, I’m here. Don’t worry, I got you. I got you.” I soothe her, my voice reaching a calmness I never knew I could get, hoping to be warm for her, to make her feel safe. “Let it all out, Im. Let it out.” The soft strands of her hair brush against my lips as I talk to her, wanting to be her rock, the pillar she needs me to be now that she’s crumbling down.
She then breaks down completely. And I catch her. Her sobs sound in the room, finally letting all out, letting the weight of what she’s carrying fall from her shoulders, letting me hold it for her, at least for a moment. I feel her lean in more into me, and I move so my back gets pressed against the wall, letting her rest against me even more as my hands never cease to caress her. I feel her tears soaking down my tunic, but I don’t give a fuck. I only care about her feeling safe, comfortable, held. I keep whispering words to her, keeping her head tucked under my chin as she cries her heart out into my chest.
I don’t care how much time passes, just that she’s now breathing evenly, calming down at the rhythm of my heart. I don’t let her go yet, I just hold her. I don’t want to let her go. I keep caressing her, enjoying the way she feels in my arms, like she belongs here. Like she’s meant to be here, meant to be mine to hold.
But she then starts to pull away, and I retain every second of the feeling of her pressed against me, until she’s completely away from me. She keeps her head down, so I go to softly slip my fingers under her chin, wanting her to look at me. “Don’t.” Her voice gives out how much time she’s been crying. She’s Hiding from me. “I don’t want you to see me like this.” Her tone is low, barely hearable. She’s worried, as if I could ever think something bad about her. I put my fingers more firmly against her chin, yet not tilting her head up. “Im,” I call for her, my voice soft, wanting nothing more than her to feel safe with me “look at me.” I plea, and slowly, a bit doubtful, she finally tilts her head up, letting me see her face. Even if she’s swollen, wet, with her eyes irritated and her cheeks red, she’s still as beautiful as ever.
“You’re always beautiful to me, Imogen. Don’t hide.” The truth slips from my lips easily, because it’s like that. She’s always been the most beautiful to me. I reach with my thumbs to delicately brush away the tears that remained on her cheeks, feeling her soft skin, the little temperature they catch when I look into those gorgeous eyes that have been starring in my best dreams for years. “You don’t have to lie to me because I’m weak, Gar. I’m well aware that I’m not a standard of beauty at this moment.” She answers to me, like she could ever be such a thing as weak or not beautiful.
“I’m not lying. And you’re not weak” I let the words out slowly, letting her process them. “You’re one of the strongest persons I know. Ever since we were little. You were always the strong one that carried whatever problem Bodhi, Xaden or I needed help carrying, even if you had your own. You’ve carried the weight of the world in your back for so long, longer than anybody I know. Even your signet, Im. You’re strong enough to erase memories, but also to remember all the things that you erase, to carry what is asked that others forget, even if it hurts. You’re so fucking strong, Imogen.” I speak from my heart, from everything I ever felt and feel for her, from everything I admire about her. I look into her eyes, my hands still cupping her face as hope she can see the way I see her, that she can see herself through my eyes. “Crying doesn’t make you weak. Breaking down doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human, Im.” My thumbs caress her skin softly, and I breathe deeply, guiding her into doing the same, helping her to get her control over herself back. “Let me help you carry this weight. Talk to me.” I ask softly, hoping she’ll let me in. Because I would do anything to take that weight from her shoulders so she can breathe again.
“It 's…” She trails off, taking a deep breath before continuing. “Everything. Ever since Draithus everything is playing on repeat in my head and… It was too much.” She confesses, and closes her eyes for a moment. “Sorry, I cried all over your tunic” She apologizes next, and I get that she doesn’t want to talk about it now, and I respect it. I look down at the wet area on my tunic and I couldn’t care less.
“Don’t worry about it” I reassure, giving her a little smile, accepting to talk about something else. “I meant what I said before. You’re always beautiful to me, Im” I say instead, because I need her to know that I mean it, that she means that to me. I can’t help but smile softly as I see her cheeks flushing a little deeper.
She looks up at me, and my gaze finds those beautiful green eyes she has, that look back up at me as if she’s letting me into her soul. I softly brush a wild strand of hair from her face behind her ear, the action tender and sweet. I retain a smile. We’re certainly not used to having sweet things, especially not since we’ve been marked as the children of traitors. But Imogen was always sweet to me, in her own way she was always caring, tender and sweet. Fuck, she’s probably sweeter than I’ll ever deserve, but I want to keep her anyways.
Both our gazes melt in the other’s, speaking all the words we’re too scared to say out loud. She parts her lips slightly, like she’s looking for words, but never says anything. Instead, her gaze falls to my lips for an instant, and what can I do if not let my eyes stare at hers too. She drags her eyes back to mine, and tilts her head just a little bit closer to mine. And I feel like I’m dreaming. Does she really want me too? Does the woman of my dreams actually want me too? I lean in a bit more, my eyes glued to hers. At some point I feel her hands coming to rest against my chest, and I know she can feel the way my heart is racing for her. We’re just a breath away.
“Can I kiss you, Im?” I ask softly, wanting, pleading her answer is yes. I feel my heart jumping in my chest when she nods, “Please, kiss me Gar.” And I almost sob when I realize she just let me do what I’ve been dreaming about for years.
My lips are on hers and, Gods, there was no way I could imagine how good she actually feels. I let my lips just pressed against hers for a moment, wanting to savor every bit of it, of her, before slowly starting to move. I let one of my hands tangle in the back of her head as the other pulls her closer to me by her waist, angling her head to kiss her deeper. I throw all the feelings I’ve been hiding for years, letting her feel how much she makes me feel. I slowly slide my tongue into her mouth, and I swallow the little gasp she lets out as she grips my tunic over my chest.
I prolong it as much as I can, knowing for sure that if I could I would asphyxiate by never stopping to kiss her. We gasp for air, our breaths mingling when we pull away. “Fuck Im,” I let out, not finding any other words to react to the feeling of her lips over mine “you have no idea for how long I wanted to do that”, I confess, dignity be damned. I want her, and I want her to know how much and for how long.
“Then do it again.” She says, and I waste no time in bringing our mouths together again, more intense this time, the years of watching her from a distance, of dreaming about her, of sleepless nights every time I saw her with another guy, every bit of longing put into the kiss. I groan against her lips when one of her hands tangles in my hair, pulling me to her, my hand gripping her waist with absolute possession, because there’s no way any other man would ever have her like this after this, after us. I’m completely and utterly hers, since the moment she let me kiss her. Who am I lying to? I’ve been hers ever since I realized how my heartbeat raced when she was close, when I was fourteen. She parts away from my lips only to trail down hers along my jaw, her soft, wet lips caressing my skin as her hand falls from my chest to slip beneath my tunic, feeling her palm now pressed against my abs as she lifts the garment slowly.
I can’t help but move my head to the side, gifting more of my skin to her, to her lips. But a thought invades my head, clearing some of the haze that the feeling of her against me created. She had a shit day, fuck, she had just cried her heart out against my chest, she’s not thinking clearly. What if we fuck and she regrets it tomorrow? I don’t think I can handle her rejecting me. I slip my hand from her waist to softly grab her wrist, stopping her. “Im I…” I start, not finding the words.
I feel like a horrible human being when she freezes, her face painted with doubt and what looks a lot like fear. Her hands fly away from me as if it was as hot as dragonfire, and I feel my heart clench. “Sorry, I thought…” She stutters, ashamed. I don’t think I ever heard her stutter before. Her gaze completely avoids mine. She thinks I’m rejecting her.
“No, wait, you thought well” I clarify, taking my fingers to tilt her chin back up. If she only knew how much I wanted her. If she only knew my cock is so hard it hurts. “I just… I don’t want to be the guy to take advantage on you when you’ve got a bad day, Im” I admit, looking into her eyes.
Her face switches to the expression she makes when she sees Xaden and Violet making out. I’m a bit confused now. But then it turns into the look she gives me when she’s about to give me shit, “Gar” she says my name, and I feel my cock throb even more at the sight of her, the way she can switch from the sweetest girl ever to the woman that could definitely mop the floor with my body if she wanted. “I’ve been wanting this since I’m fifteen,” The confession almost brings me to my ass. Has she wanted me since then too? “Believe me when I say you’re not taking advantage of anyone here.” I bite the interior of my cheek at the realization that I should have definitely made a move before. “And also, I don’t know if tomorrow I’ll be alive. The moment they call me for interrogation I’m maybe as good as dead. So don’t get all mushy on me now, Gar” This time, when she finds my eyes with hers, I can definitely see fear and uncertainty in her green depths.
They were not gonna hurt her. I won't allow it. My blood boils at the idea of any of the officers daring to lay a hand on her with the intent of harm. “I won’t let them hurt you” I say, determined. If I have to behead every single one of the riders, I swear to Dunne I’ll do it if they try anything.
“We both know you can’t do anything to prevent them to torture me until I spill everything” She says, her voice soft, her hand coming to softly rest against my cheek. “So, if you want me too, take me tonight. I want you always but tonight is the only day I can assure you I’ll be alive for you to have me” I look into her eyes. No, I won’t lose her too.
“I mean it. I won’t let them hurt you.” I can handle the idea of any of those motherfuckers even touching a single pink strand of hair from her head. “If they dare cut one single hair from your head there’ll be blood.” I’m being completely honest. She won’t be harmed. I hold her tighter, and she lets out a soft chuckle that brings me back to the moment, to us. She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me closer, her hands tangling in my hair, looking into my eyes with nothing more than determination and desire. “Are you really sure about this? I don’t want you to regret it tomorrow” I speak softly, confessing my worries, my thumbs softly caressing her waist.
“Do I really have to repeat the “Since I’m fifteen” part?” She answers, and the blush that spreads along her cheeks is enough to make me smirk, already thinking about many ways of using that statement against her. She bites her lip before tiptoeing to kiss me and shut up anything that was gonna come out of my mouth.
I let her shut me up, concentrating on the task in hand, pulling her as close as possible, her hands pulling my hair softly to angle my head so I can kiss her deeper. I feel her hands reaching the hem of my tunic and I take my arms away from her body only to lift them up so she can take the piece of fabric off me. My mouth is back on hers even before the tunic hits the floor, her hands now wandering around my newly exposed skin. She touches every inch of me, feeling everything that marks my skin. I can’t help but let out a low groan when she teases a spot on my lower stomach, and she does it again, and again, and again until I can’t take it anymore. My hands fly to her thighs, grabbing her from the back of them to lift her, and I feel her wrap her legs around my waist as I walk us to the bed. I lower her delicately over the mattress, not wasting time before I climb over her, my lips never parting from hers. I only leave her mouth to go down and kiss her jaw, her neck, the place where I can feel her pulse racing against my lips. I suck that spot, then flick my tongue against it, then suck it again. Her breathing is racing, but for all the good reasons now. I catch a glimpse of her biting her lip, and the way she can barely hide the sounds that her throat threatens to let out. The sounds I’m making her make. I wanna hear it all. I finally lift my gaze, and…
Fuck.
The sight of Imogen Cardulo, the woman of my dreams, the tough girl that has me gripping my hard cock alone at midnight while I think about her since I’m fourteen, blushed, hair messy, her eyes shining with desire, pinned beneath me, is now embedded to my brain. She’s the definition of beauty, fierceness and sexiness all together, and I have to think about random historical facts to maintain myself from coming just from the view. She’s still fully clothed and I’m already about to come.
She’s still fully clothed and very much silent, when I want her to be screaming from pleasure instead. My eyes lock on hers as I reach down for her tunic, lifting it slowly, almost teasingly as inch after inch of gorgeous skin is revealed. When I go past her chest, I feel my cock jump at the sight. She doesn’t have any kind of breast band on. Instead, I’m welcomed with her modest breasts, her pink nipples already peaked and begging for attention. She blushes as I take the sight before me, admiring how every part of her is nothing less than beautiful. I move my hand to cup one of her tits, my thumb teasing the sensitive nipple, and I smirk when she finally lets out a little moan, the sound travelling directly to my cock, and I decide that I wanna listen to that for the rest of my life. I take my lips back to her neck, slowly pathing down until I reach her other nipple, sucking it into my mouth and enjoying the moan that escapes her mouth again, her back arching to press herself more into me.
I can’t help myself, I want to hear more of her, I want to make her feel the best pleasure she ever felt. My hand travels down, toying with the waistband of her pants before looking up, making sure she can see as I suck her nipple into my mouth as my eyes wait for her confirmation. She nods and I waste no time, diving back in between her breasts as I lower her pants down her legs, throwing it somewhere on the floor, her sexy, toned legs now exposed to me. I slip my hand to cup her through her underwear and fuck, she’s soaked. Her hips buckle up to my hand, and the moan that she lets out becomes my favorite sound in the world. My fingers find her clit and I stroke her, making her unravel, her fingers scratching my scalp as she pulls my hair. “Gar, please” She moans when I stroke her faster, and Gods, I want her to moan my name again and again. I smile against her nipple and move the fabric of her underwear to the side.
“You’ll tell me if you want to stop,” I say, not giving room to other options. I wait until she nods to slide my finger along her core, and I bite my lip at the feeling of how drenched she is. “Fuck, so fucking wet” I groan, moving to slam my lips against hers again, sliding my tongue into her mouth at the same time I slip one finger into her tight cunt. I keep fucking her with my finger as i swallow the moans she lets out, breaking the kiss to gift me her beautiful sounds. As our tongues tangle, I find her clit with my thumb, stroking it in circles in a matching rhythm with the finger inside her. I curl it up and she arches abruptly, throwing her head back in a loud moan, and I keep teasing that spot over and over again, adding another finger to stretch her even more, my lips sucking at the skin ok her throat. Her nails sink on my arm as I keep stroking her, her moans more and more desperate. “Gar”. There goes my name again, my cock throbbing at the sound. I feel her starting to clench even more, her breathing more erratic. She’s so fucking close.
“I’ve got you, beautiful, let go for me” I reassure, the nickname coming out naturally. If only she could see herself, see how beautiful she is like this, so unbound, so free, so sweet. And when she comes? Oh there’s no dream, tale or imagination enough to prepare me for such a view. She’s gorgeous, her tight cunt clenching around my fingers, her cheeks a bright pink as her face contorts in pleasure, her head thrown back as her thighs tremble. The way she moans my name like a prayer has my already hurting cock in an even more painful erection. I work her through it, making sure to make it as long as possible. I watch as she loses herself and then comes back, recovering her breath, focusing her eyes back on me. I lean back to kiss her, taking my fingers away from her and I’m sure that if my mouth wasn't over hers, there’d be a little pout at the loss. She brings me closer, her hands tangling back on my hair as I kiss her deeply. My mouth then moves to start a path down her jaw, then her throat, not missing her nipples before kissing her ribs.
“Where are you going?” She asks, her tone relaxed and playful as I kiss around her navel, I look up at her with complete cockyness and challenge, continuing my way down.
“I’m nowhere near to be done with you, Imogen.” I answer. And I sure wasn’t. I wanted to bring her to the edge again and again and again, wanting to hear her moan for me, to watch her lose control, the beautiful expressions her face makes. I wanted to dedicate myself to her, to live only by and for her. She can be my own personal goddess that I’m more than happy to serve.
I slide her underwear down her legs and dive in. My tongue lays flat against her clit before flicking it slowly, her hands suddenly coming to grasp my hair. I hook each of my arms around her thighs, keeping her open as I devour her like a man starved. She tastes devine, I want nothing more than to drown in her arousal, lapping on every drop she releases.“Oh, Gods, Garrick” She moans as I suck her clit into my mouth, her hips grinding against my face desperately. “You taste incredible, beautiful. I’ll never get enough of you” I say against her wet slit, “Come for me, Im. Drench my face with your pleasure.” I beg. I want her to come undone all over my mouth, to show me how much she enjoys this. And she does. I feel her gushing all over my face as her grip on my hair tightens, pulling hardly as she moans even louder.
She stays laid down for a longer while now, recovering from her hard orgasm. I kiss my way up her again, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand as I take her in.
Gods, she’s beautiful. Not just pretty, sexy or cute. She looks drop dead gorgeous like this. I sit back on my heels to admire her, to take her in. She’s a work of art. I’m too focused on her beauty. I don't notice her moving until her hand finds my painful cock and grabs the bulge over my sleeping pants. I groan, my hips bucking to her hand as I twitch. She strokes and squeezes me over the fabric, making me moan low. She arranges herself so she can reach better, biting her lip as she torturously slowly lowers my pants and underwear until my cock bounces free. I’m hard as a rock, aching for her touch, for release. She gently strokes me and I moan again, encouraging her. “Fuck, Im” I let out, one of my hands coming to wrap around hers, showing her the way, throwing my head back at the feeling.
I let her stroke me for a while longer before I reach the point where I’m about to explode. I softly take her hand away from me and I stand up, finishing to remove my clothes before moving over her again, finding her lips with mine. She wraps her arms around me, her fingers softly caressing my back. When I part from her lips, I look at her, admiring once again. I brush a soft strand of hair behind her ear, just like I did before we kissed. I melt into her beautiful green eyes as she traces my face with one of her hands. She traces every feature, every mark, every scar. I move my head to kiss her palm when she reaches the scar I got in Athebyne, leaning into it after, enjoying the warmth, the softness. Enjoying her.
We kiss again, our tongues tangling deeply as it turns more heated. We both gasp when we part for air, our eyes meeting. “You sure about this?” I ask, still giving her the chance to back away if she wasn’t sure. She nods, and I can see all she feels right in her eyes. I see in her green depths what I know my own eyes reflect. Determination, desire, love. I move to position myself against her entrance, looking at her one last time to make sure she’s okay. I slowly start to push inside, moaning at the sensation of how tight she is around me. I bury my face into the crook of her neck as I enter entirely, giving her time to adjust to the sensation. When she moves her hips to let me know she’s okay, I start to move. Slowly at first, both of us moaning against each other's lips, then I start to fasten the rhythm, feeling her nails scratch the skin of my back, leaving her mark there as I slide in and out of her. “Gar, oh Garrick” She moans, her eyes melting on mine. “You feel incredible, beautiful” I moan too, closing my eyes to just let myself feel, to take in all the feelings she causes on me. “You are incredible, Im” I correct myself, losing myself in her gaze, my thrusts already starting to uncoordinate as my release gets closer and closer. I reach down to stroke her clit rapidly, helping to bring her to her high. “Let go for me, beautiful, I’ve got you” I beg against her mouth before slamming our lips together.
She clenches deliciously around me a couple of seconds later, her nails sinking into my back as she comes, dragging me with her as we both moan into the kiss. I spill inside her, moaning her name as I paint her insides with my high.
I support myself on my forearms to not crush her with my body, my face again buried into her neck. And everything feels right. The world can be crumbling around me, but I know that if I have her, I have everything I need.