Chapter Text
“Idia! You have to get up!” Ortho exclaimed. At least, Idia hoped it was Ortho. He was still half asleep and wasn’t his brain wasn’t braining the way it should.
“Ugh… five more minutes…” Idia grumbled as he rolled over. It was too early to rejoin society. Not that he had to physically rejoin society. He attended all of his classes digitally, thanks to his ipad. Still, he’d much rather sleep in.
His little brother groaned, “I hoped it wouldn’t come to this…” There was a silence for a moment after that before Idia’s favorite Premo song was blasting from Ortho’s speaker.
Idia immediately bolted up right and fell out of bed. “Oof…”
Ortho giggled. “Sorry, Idia, but school starts in five minutes and I have to get to class!”
“Right…” Idia grumbled.
“...You know, you could walk me to class-”
“Don’t push it, Ortho.” Idia said, rolling his eyes. He grabbed his ipad and activated it.
Ortho shrugged, “Worth a shot!” When Idia’s ipad floated out of the room, Ortho followed it, waving. “Bye!”
“Byeeeeeee.” Idia replied, rather unenthusiastically. When Ortho was gone, Idia groaned and flopped on his bed, arm resting over his eyes. Why am I so tired…? He thought to himself. He answered his own question, Oh right. I stayed up grinding on Dystopic Mages instead of sleeping. He grinned to himself, So worth it.
Dystopic Mages was a video game he’d been playing since he was thirteen years old. It had been his comfort game since the original Ortho…
…yeah…
Anyways, the plot in a nutshell is the game takes place in a world where magicless people are much more common than people with magic. Some mad magicless scientist was illegally testing on a group mages, not knowing that all the tests made them overpowered. The mages escaped and sent the land into a dystopian world. It’s the main character’s job (your job) to fix it. Of course, throughout the game, the main character realizes they’re a mage, learns the truth, rebuilds the land by helping the mages burn it down first, blah, blah, blah, the power of friendship, blah, blah, blah, good prevails. Yay.
There were other parts of the game, too, like the gacha (his beloved), designing your own hideout which you could invite your friends to hang out at (virtually, obviously), minigames, designing your own character, and - Idia’s personal favorite - team battles.
The test subject mages created monsters that you battle. Most of them are battled when you fight them in the levels, but there are a few powerful and giant monsters that you can’t battle by yourself. These are when team battles come in. You invite friends to join you in battling the monster.
At first, Idia found it stupid. Why should he need to make friends just to play one part of a stupid game? Why couldn’t he just play it by himself?
Of course, this was before he met his group of online friends. The Friendly Demons 👹.
There were seven of them if he counted himself; Rhyme, Dumpling, Mittens (originally Lynx), Aquaman, Aphrodite, Magey, and Hellfire (what Idia went by online). Originally, the group was just Idia, Mittens, and Dumpling. It was kind of weird to think of how much time had passed since then…
☆ ☆ ☆
Five years ago…
Idia was fourteen years old when he first met them. Back before he went by Gloomurai, before he met Muscle Red, and before he saw the appeal in friends at all, online friends included. He was using his MagiCubes (Dystopic Mages’ gacha currency) to do as many ten draws as he could. He’d been grinding for weeks in hopes to get the new SR+ character, and so far, he had no luck. He only had enough for one more one draw.
“C’mon…” He muttered to himself. He was about to click the ‘Draw 1’ button when he a chat notification. “EEK!!!” Idia nearly fell out of his chair.
“Are you okay, Idia?” Ortho asked, floating in at the sound of his older brother’s screech.
“Um- yeah, all good!” Idia reassured.
Ortho scanned Idia to make sure he was physically okay, then asked, “Well, you’re not hurt… Are you sad?”
Idia shook his head, “No, just got jumpscared by my game.”
“...But you’re not playing a horror game?”
“I got jumpscared by social opportunities."
Ortho’s eyes widened with understanding, “Ohhhhhh,” he smiled(?) then floated back out, “okay then!” He closed the door.
With a sigh, Idia turned back to his screen, staring at the little envelope button with the notification dot. It was like it was mocking him. His original plan was to ignore it and go back to gambling - that one pull could be the SR+ - but something in him really wanted to see who sent the message and what they wanted. He kept telling himself, Curiosity killed the kitty, curiosity killed the kitty, don’t kill the kitty, don’t kill the kitty…
“Sorry, kitty… maybe satisfaction’ll bring you back?”
He clicked the button. Almost ironically, the message was from a user named ‘BiG_CaTtY’.
Private chat with @BiG_CaTtY:
BiG_CaTtY: hey, me and this other user @-Chao$_Gr3mlin want to do the team battles but aPpArEnTlY you need at least two “friends” to do it with you. wanna friend and do them with us?
Idia stared at the screen, rereading it over and over again. “...Crap.”
Well, that metaphorical kitty was damned to Underworld. If only this BiG_CaTtY guy could follow the kitty’s lead, but no such luck.
Out of all the users this person could have picked to ask, why did it have to be Idia? Sure, this ‘BiG_CaTtY’ person could’ve clicked Idia’s character to view his profile, but more than three million play Dystopic Mages. Out all the people this guy could have randomly clicked on, why did it have to be him?
There were a few things he could do here. He could: A) Ignore it - seeming like the most probable option, B) Politely decline, C) Decline slightly less politely and tell the user that they could stick it where even Zeus wouldn’t go, or D) Accept. Every instinct in Idia was telling him to either decline or ignore it. He didn’t need friends IRL, online friends, or even online acquaintances. They were a waste of time and energy.
But some part of him for a reason he couldn’t explain wanted to accept the invite.
With a sigh, Idia typed out his response. It took much longer than it should have, but he kept deleting then retyping. Finally, he sent:
-Cool_Beansss- (you): um, sure ig. is this gonna be a 1 time thing orrrrrrr?
BiG_CaTtY: i don’t know but i dont care enough to make other ‘friends’ on this game so probably not
Fair enough… Idia thought to himself. He himself didn’t want to make more friends than he needed to. Not because he didn’t care, but he had this nagging feeling that people talked about him behind his back. It was just better to avoid people all together than to let them judge him. Idia could also appreciate how the user said (typed?) ‘friends’ in quotation marks, like they were less ‘friends’ and more people who happened to have the same goal.
The only annoying thing about Dystopic Mages is that you can’t create a group chat with multiple people in game chats. You’d have to either all be on call (which Idia was not about to do with strangers, or anyone for the most part) or create an Iris server. Iris is a site where you can create a server and add people to it, then talk to them through call or chat.
-Cool_Beansss- (you): alr. should we create a Iris server then? so we all know when we’re free to play or whatever
BiG_CaTtY: i mean probably
-Cool_Beansss- (you): ok ill send the join link to u then u send it to the other guy
Idia sent a friend request to both of them, then pulled up Iris on one of his other monitors and created a server. He gave it a quick description then sent the link to BiG_CaTtY. And then he waited anxiously. After a few minutes, they both accepted his friend request and two people joined the Iris server.
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Hellfire (you): ummm hi, im -Cool_Beansss- in game. wb yall?
Lynx: hey. BiG_CaTtY
Dumpling: hiiiiii!!! Im -Chao$_Gr3mlin :DDD
Oh, great. There was an extrovert.
Hellfire (you): how long have u 2 been playing together?
Lynx: since 7 minutes ago
Dumpling: yeah i kinda just went up to him in game and asked if he wanted to play a team battle with me and help me find one other person
Well, at least he wasn’t an outsider joining some kind of max level friendship duo. That would be awkward, for Idia, at least. He wasn’t sure how the other two would’ve felt.
Hellfire (you): ok. also is ok if we just talk like that? sry but tbh i dont like calls with ppl ik let alone ppl i met online
Dumpling: thats fine!!
Lynx: i dont rlly care
Dumpling: before i forget, pronouns? if its too personal, u dont have to tell but mine are he/him
Lynx: he/him
Hellfire (you): mine r he/they
Dumpling: oki
Lynx: are we gonna play or not?
Hellfire (you): id hope we are or i just friended yall for nothing
Dumpling: right, right, sry-
Lynx: i just sent the invite to u guys to join the battle
Sure enough, when Idia checked his monitor with Dystopic Mages open, an invite to join a team battle had appeared on his screen. “One battle…” he mumbled to himself as he pressed ‘Join’.
One battle turned into two. Then two turned into three. Then three turned into five and before Idia knew it, the three of them played and talked for two hours. Idia hardly realized how much time had passed since they started before a notification lit up the chat again.
Lynx: guys i got to go, parents are calling
Dumpling: yah same, i have dance lessons :p
To Idia’s surprise, he actually felt somewhat disappointed. At the beginning of the first team battle, he expected to walk away feeling relieved, but all he wanted was to play another round.
Hellfire (you): oh alr, cya then
Dumpling: WAIT WAIT WAIT I HAVE A QUESTION BEFORE YALL GO
Lynx: by the seven, just ask
Dumpling: okokok, so you guys know the Luxie x Nex, yeah? Nexie? im just gonna assume u all have since almost everyone has. what do u honestly think about it?
Oh, that ship… Idia thought. That ship. Personally, Idia didn’t see the appeal, but most of the fandom was crazy about it. Not that he ever admitted that anywhere, though. Some people in fandoms could be really crazy. He had seen people tell others to kill themselves just because the other person didn’t have the same opinion. No way in the underworld was Idia about to get himself shot by people he had actually started to tolerate-
Lynx: personally? i dont like it all that much. dont kill me.
…Wait, what?
Dumpling: honestly same. like i get WHY ppl like it but at some point it’s like “ok, it’s your otp, thats fine, but theres better”
Hellfire (you): oms someone finally said it ty bro 😭🙏
Lynx: for real, ppl can have their opinions, but my opinion is that ship is shit
Dumpling: thank you guys for not jumping me T0T
Hellfire (you): i would never jump someone for a valid opinion
Lynx: i will jump someone for an invalid opinion tho
Dumpling: like what??
Lynx: i dont know like racist, misogynistic etc. shit?
Hellfire (you): Lynx’s wisdom stat is off the charts frfr
Lynx: damn straight
Dumpling: okok now i ACTUALLY gtg before i get threatened with taking my adhd meds
Hellfire (you): arent those a lil important chat??
Dumpling: i wouldn’t know ive never taken them :p
Hellfire (you): lol fair tbh
Lynx: i should go before one of my parents woop my ass
Hellfire (you): bye ig, hope yalls days are ass woopin and adhd med free 😌
Dumpling: lol thank you 😭 byeeeeee ttyl
Lynx: bye
Idia watched as the two of them went offline, still buzzing with excitement. “Did I just score two SSR tier level online friends?” He couldn’t wait for their next gaming session.
☆ ☆ ☆
One year later…
The three of them played and talked almost everyday for the entire year. It became Idia’s highlight of the day. One of the best part was that every new update, the game released new monsters with new add-ons and expansions on the team battles, so they never got bored. Plus, new events usually brought new minigames they could play together as well.
There were official rules in the Iris server now. Rule one was to be respectful when someone was being serious, rule two was to never pressure any of the server’s members to say something personal or try to pry into their personal lives; each individual only shares as much of their life as they choose, and three was no calls. Ever.
There was never a dull moment with the three of them, even if Lynx acted/was all apathetic and pretended to be dull, Idia and Dumpling knew he wasn’t. That was apparent in their most recent conversation:
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Lynx: someone fucking save me
Hellfire (you): vro wat happened? Did u drop three ranks in the arena or smth??
Dumpling: DID U GET KIDNAPPED???
Lynx: no, my ranks are fine, and how tf would i be talking to yall if i got kidnapped? also if i was kidnapped and i had my phone, i’d text someone who lived near me
Hellfire (you): if i get kidnapped, chats, dont try to find me, i couldnt be happier (prolly) 🙏
Dumpling: …anyways, what happened, lynx?
Lynx: my older brother wont stop calling me mittens.
Idia had to laugh out loud at that. What kind of fuckass older brother did Lynx have?
Hellfire (you): erm, broski what?
Dumpling: why??
Lynx: he found some old baby video of me wearing oversized mittens and hes NOT letting me live it down. Pls kill me.
Dumpling: PFFFFFFT- HAHAHAH
Hellfire (you): that sounds like a skill issue. If i were u, i wouldve used all the exp i earned to get that video deleted
Dumpling: OMS PLEASE CHANGE YOUR DISPLAY NAME TO MITTENS, PLS LYNX, I BEG
Lynx: …
Lynx changed their display name to ‘Mittens’.
Mittens: i hate u all
Dumpling: WAR IS OVER 😭
Hellfire (you): MWEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHHE NEVER MENTION SHIT LIKE THAT TO US, U WILL TAKE MAX AURA DAMAGE
This had to be the best day of Idia’s life. He grinned at his screen. Idia could practically feel Lynx’s - Mittens’ - glare through the screen. He probably regretted becoming friends with them. Oh well. He signed up for this.
Anyways, that chat for a while longer, play a game or two, before Dumpling sends a screenshot in the chat. It was a photo of what Idia assumed was a message someone had sent him. It was from someone with the username ‘fashi0n_divaaaa’. The message read “hello, im new to this whole ‘mmrpgo’ game or whatever the acronym is. honestly, i downloaded this app out of sheer boredom to play in between gigs, but i do want to try team battles. do u think i might be able to play with you and your friends? if u have any”.
Mittens: wow
Hellfire (you): ‘gigs’. They playing Dress for Fame or smth?
Dumpling: guys, be nice. anyways should we give them a chance?
Mittens: i dont know, they seem to be a bit much
Dumpling: cmon, im sure u guys thought that about me at first, but look where we’re at now!
That was true. Idia did think Dumpling was too much at first. Far to extroverted for Idia’s socially anxious ass, anyway. But over time, he learned to grow accustomed to and fond-ish of Dumpling’s sunshiney-ness, even if Idia himself couldn’t understand nor muster enough courage to leave his room. Dumpling seemed like the type of guy to burst out of his room with a big grin and take a deep breath of that ‘fresh air’. Mittens was the kind of person to wake up, take a breath of that ‘fresh air’, only notice how much sand went up his nose (according to Mittens, he lived somewhere in the Sunset Savana) instead of how brightly the sun was shining, then proceed to fall asleep somewhere else. As for Idia, he took a deep breath of the air inside his bedroom and that was enough.
Back on topic, Idia wasn’t sure he wanted a new addition to the group. The dynamics between the three of them were peak. What if this new guy just messed it up? What if the noob brought so much drama that a huge fight broke out and all of them never spoke to each other again? Idia would be depressed for days and quite possibly never recover.
Hellfire (you): why would we need another member? I mean the three of us together is already a legendary combo. Why change whats going good? Plus theyre giving mega normie vibes. I bet they function like a normal person
Mittens: exactly. minus the slang.
Dumpling: guys pleaseeeeeee? if they rlly end up being that bad, we’ll kick em out! Easy! But lets just play a round or two with them, ok?
Hellfire (you): sigh, fineeeee.
Mittens: do whatever, i guess. I dont care, i just work here
Idia groaned and leaned back in his chair. The dread he felt when he was first invited into this group was back. The chat was quiet for a moment. He took that opportunity to do his game’s dailies. By the time he had claimed the daily for completing all the other dailies, he had a friend request from fashi0n_divaaaa. With a sigh, he accepted it and went back to the Iris server, where Dumpling had already added the new guy.
Aphrodite has joined the chat.
Aphrodite: I’m assuming these are the others?
Dumpling: yup! Mittens is ‘BiG_CaTtY’ and Hellfire is ‘-Cool_Beansss-’
Mittens: hey
Hellfire (you): hi ig
Aphrodite: Hello
Dumpling: so do we wanna get know each other first or start playing?
Hellfire (you): start playing
Aphrodite: if you don’t mind, I’d like to get to know you all
Of course this Aphrodite wanted to get to know them. Why do people like to talk? Why?
Everyone exchanged basic information, like pronouns, age, what they enjoy, etc.. Aphrodite said his pronouns were he/him and he was fourteen.
Dumpling: oh were all around the same age then! im 13, mittens is 16, and hellfire’s also 14 :D
Aphrodite: oh, well thats nice. At least now i know you guys aren’t pedophiles like last time
Mittens: the fuck you mean ‘last time’?
Aphrodite: unimportant. Anyways what do you all like to do for fun?
Dumpling: i do dance, sometimes. i also really like exploring
Idia blinked and reread the last four messages. Was really no one going to question it? Then he remembered that one of the rules was that the group members only had to share what they wished. It hadn’t occurred to him before that that meant someone could give everyone a glimpse of their lore then withhold it from all of them. Well, RIP Idia’s urge to know more.
Mittens: nap and spelldrive
Hellfire (you): gaming and watching anime and stuff
Dumpling: wat about u Aphrodite??
Aphrodite: fashion and makeup. Oh and acting
Fashion and makeup? That sounded… kind of cool. Sometimes Idia wanted to be more fashionable, like maybe with a bit more aesthetic (cue the sparkles) or something, and honestly, some makeup looks seemed really cool. The only problem was his sensory issues. Makeup felt cakey on his face and lot of fabrics made him want to tear his skin off, so he just settled for his comfy clothes, like hoodies and sweatpants. And the occasional cosplay, but those took a while to put together, between finding clothes that he could wear without dying inside and finding clothes that looked good.
Hellfire (you): thats cool ig
Dumpling: yeah!!
Aphrodite: thank you
Mittens: whatever can we start playing nuw?
Dumpling: heh, ‘nuw’?
Mittens: u know what i meant dumbass, im tired
Aphrodite: one last thing before we start?
By the Seven, now what?
Dumpling: sure! wat is it?
Aphrodite: i just want to be clear, I dont ship Luxie and Nex. I also just watched someone in the game chat tell someone else to kill themself because they said they didn’t really ship it, so if this will be a problem, speak now or forever hold your peace.
Hellfire (you): …
Dumpling: …
Mittens: …
Hellfire (you): THANK THE EVER LOVING GACHA GODS-
Aphrodite: wait, you guys dont ship it either?
Mittens: hell no
Dumpling: there’s way better, tbh :p
Aphrodite: oh thank seven-
Hellfire (you): can we PLS start playing now?
Mittens: fine you impatient nerd
Hellfire (you): erm, rude
Dumpling: lets gooooo!!!
And then there were four.
☆ ☆ ☆
Two years later…
High school snuck up on Idia and before they knew it, they were attending Night Raven College. At least they was allowed to attend class via ipad most days thanks to a deal they made with Headmage Crowley. Around this time, Idia met another online friend named Muscle Red, but he didn’t play Dystopic Mages.
Fortunately, his online friends who did play Dystopic Mages didn’t abandon him like he worried they would and were still amazing as always.
Things stayed the same for another two years. Aphrodite quickly became part of their group and they played games together every week as the good Seven intended. Idia actually found himself opening up to them (barely and what Idia did share was never too deep, but they opened up nonetheless). Sometimes the other three did too. For example, Mittens admitted he felt, no, knew he would always be too much and not enough for his parents, Aphrodite sometimes felt pressured because of all of his ‘gigs’ (though he was yet to tell the group what said ‘gigs’ were. He could’ve been an assassin for all they knew), and Dumpling always felt like he had to keep this sunshine persona going even if he all he felt was despair.
You know, everything that adults would classify as the usual ‘teen angst’ and turn a blind eye to instead getting them - what was that word again? - therapy.
Anyways, after Aphrodite was added, so was a fourth rule; members of the server must have a neutral opinion on NexIe.
And guess what happened after two years of no new players? The Seven looked down upon all of them and decided ‘You know what? Let’s make them adopt another stray’. The day started out normal enough. They were chatting about random things. Mittens was being oddly quiet. Usually he would’ve told them to shut up by now or just have joined in in the conversation, but Idia just figured it was one of those rare days Mittens had plans.
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Aphrodite: Hellfire, don’t be uncouth and get your legs off your desk
Hellfire (you): first of all, who says uncouth in the 21st century? cringe alert. secondly mind yo business vro. thirdly HOW TF DID YOU KNOW????
Aphrodite: first of all, me. And who still says ‘cringe’ as an insult? Secondly, never. Thirdly, I can sense this sort of incident from all the way across the country, you unrefined swine
Hellfire (you): I HOPE YOU HAVE TERRIBLE LUCK IN THE GACHA AND ALL THE NEW CLOTHES YOU WANT TO USE TO UPDATE YOUR CHARACTER ARE OVERPRICED
Aphrodite: YOU TAKE THAT BACK
Hellfire (you): NO RETURN POLICY U HO
Aphrodite: HOW DARE YOU, YOU ABSOLUTE SNOLLYGOSTER
Dumpling: GUYS PLS I CANT BREATHE 😂
“WTF IS A SNOLLYGOSTER?!?!” Idia exclaimed out loud. A bit too loud.
“Idiaaaaa! Are you okay?” Ortho called.
Idia sighed, “Yes, Ortho! Sorry, maybe turn down your hearing sensors!”
“Will do!”
Him and Aphrodite continued to insult each other (in a ‘/kinda playful’ way), Idia occasionally screaming their thoughts as though if they screamed loud enough, the other would hear them through the screen. Dumpling occasionally threw in remarks like ‘IM DYING’ and just keyboard spams sometimes. Finally, Mittens joined in.
Mittens: guys
Dumpling: Mittens! U just missed the smack down of the CENTURY
Hellfire (you): yeah i just cooked aphrodite frfr
Aphrodite: sure, let’s just throw in an extra lie and say Hellfire ISN'T a gamer while we’re at it.
Hellfire (you): 🖕
Aphrodite: im above such gestures
Mittens: shut up and listen. I did something
“Oh Seven…” Idia mumbled to themself. When one of the four of them said that, that ‘something’ could range from they just made ramen to they just committed three war crimes, are now wanted by the government, and killed their parents just for the heck of it. Thankfully, Mittens seemed to be the ‘wisest’ out of all. Was that concerning? Absolutely. But at least Idia was 99% sure no war crimes were committed. Wether or not Mittens KOed his parents was still a somewhat likely possibility.
Aphrodite: oh dear, strap yourselves in everyone
Mittens: shut your mouth herbivore
Dumpling: wat happened Mittens?
Mittens: ok, so you all know the Magic Rune Match game that got added for the event, yeah?
Magic Rune Match was basically just a matching memory card game, except the little pictures on the cards were ancient magic runes. It wasn’t Idia’s favorite, but Mittens seemed to love it. Even if he had never out right said he loved it because of his entire ‘kuudere’ character archetype persona he had going on, it was easy for any of them to tell Mittens really liked the mini game, not to mention he was ranked as one of the the top twenty players in it. If you clicked on a person’s character in game, you could see things like their rankings in certain categories, how far they were in the actual storyline, their friend list, how many team battles they had played, etc.. There were settings you could edit to hide some of these things, but most people didn’t bother doing it since it wasn’t anything like a real name.
Hellfire (you): yuh wat abt it?
Mittens: some guy came up to me in game and made a bet with me saying he said he could beat me at it. Ig he saw my rank or smth. anyways the bet was that if i won, he would gift me 500 magicubes, but if HE won, he would have to join my team battle group
Dumpling: no way, you got 500 MAGICUBES?!?!?!?
Aphrodite: lucky. I struggle getting my hands on 100…
Hellfire (you): dont be shy mittens, share the love 🤲
Aphrodite: 🤲
Dumpling: 🤲
Mittens: …
Dumpling: ???
Mittens: lets not forget the second part of the bet
Aphrodite: oh sweetie, no…
Hellfire (you): BRUH UR THE GOAT AT THAT GAME WHY DID U CHOOSE THAT SPECIFIC MOMENT TO SELL????
Mittens: oh by the seven, calm the hell down
Dumpling: did u give them the join server link?
Mittens: yep. Expect friend requests from a user called ‘THE_C0N_IN_IC0N’
Aphrodite: tell me you’re joking
He was not. Sure enough, Idia got a friend request from that exact user. He grudgingly accepted the request then went back to screaming at Mittens via chat.
Hellfire (you): BROTHER U MADE A BET WITH A USER NAMED “THE_C0N_IN_IC0N”???!!!???!
Mittens: quit it, i wasnt paying attention, alright?
Dumpling: its fine guys!!! just remember to at the very least be pleasant! :D
Aphrodite: fine. But if this person tears this group apart, we blame mittens/jk
Hellfire (you): bet
Dumpling: oh absolutely (sry mittens!)
Mittens: traitors. Im surrounded by traitors.
And then THE_C0N_IN_IC0N joined.
Kingpin has joined the chat.
Kingpin: hello potential victims!
Aphrodite: excuse me?
Hellfire (you): ah hell nah 💀
Kingpin: everyone**, sorry autocorrect is an annoyance.
Aphrodite: right…
Dumpling: soooo kingpin! How’d ya manage to beat mittens?
Kingpin: sorry, who?
Dumpling: BiG_CaTtY
Mittens: me. Im still pissed
Dumpling: and before i forget, do u need me to tell u whos who?
Kingpin: no need! you’re -Chao$_Gr3mlin, hellfire is -Cool_Beansss-, and aphrodite is fashi0n_divaaaa
…Okay, Idia was so close to asking Ortho to scan his room for cameras.
Mittens: how-
Kingpin: power of deduction and observation
Aphrodite: impressive
Hellfire (you): creepy is the word i’d use, bro’s giving stalker vibes
Kingpin: and youre giving ‘hasnt seen the sun in days’ vibes
Hellfire (you): BROTHER WAT IS YOUR SOURCE??
“Ortho?” Idia called out.
Ortho floated in. “Yes, Niisan?”
“Scan my room for cameras.”
“Um… okay?” Although he sounded confused, he scanned anyways. “No cameras except your webcams and the ones in your monitors.”
Idia nodded and began to turn off the cameras. “Great, thanks.”
“Are you going to sleep soon? It’s almost eleven.” Ortho asked. “Also, I scanned for breeches in security, since I figured that’s why you were asking. There weren’t any.”
Idia’s hands paused on his webcam. “Oh.” He cleared his throat and let go of it, “Um, probably. I’m kinda busy right now, but I’ll go to sleep eventually.”
“Okay! Night, Idia!” Ortho said, going off to sleep/charge.
“Yep, GN…” He leaned back in his chair and thought for a moment. This Kingpin go had maxed out intuition stats, apparently. Idia didn’t know wether to be impressed, worried, or jealous.
When he turned his attention back to the Iris server, he had to read through a few messages of Dumpling using his special attack; Sunshiney Extrovert. It was super effective against introverts like Idia, but apparently it had no effect on Kingpin. He had already told Kingpin the gang’s ages and pronouns.
Dumpling: sooooo if its not too personal, pronouns and age?
Kingpin: he/him and i’m fifteen
Mittens: can we just play now?
Aphrodite: shut up, Mittens, your say in decision making has been revoked for the time being
Mittens: bitch??
Hellfire (you): wanna recap wat happened with the last decision u made?
Mittens: …
Dumpling: heh, u know its bad when aphrodite and hellfire team up
Kingpin: oop-
Dumpling: hope u can handle us, kingpin! we’re kind of a lot-
Kingpin: please, i hang out with the calm before the storm and a cyclone. Respectfully, this is nothing
Mittens: real
Kingpin: oh, mittens, before i forget to ask why’d you pick that to be your name?
Mittens: …
Hellfire (you): we’ll fill u in on the lore of this server while we play, we’d have to explain a few extra scenes
Kingpin: …pardon?
Aphrodite: Hellfire talks in gaming metaphors. You’ll get used to it
Kingpin: interesting??
Hellfire (you): im joining a team battle, lock tf in and join
Dumpling: 🫡
Aphrodite: quick check, you dont ship Nexie, correct?
Kingpin: no? That ship has no flavor or seasoning on it
Aphrodite: i mean not everything without seasoning is bad, like chicken, but yeah
Dumpling: respectfully jail 😁
Aphrodite: WHAT???
Mittens: you know its bad when even dumpling says no
Hellfire (you): thats crazy tbh 💀
Kingpin: i think im going to enjoy this group
From that day forward, Kingpin completed their little group of chaos. Well, he completed the group for one year. Then the two final members who actually completed the group joined.
☆ ☆ ☆
One year later…
It had been another hellish year of school. To be completely fair, it was like every other year of school. Housewarden meetings, however, became their own little slice of Tartarus. Who decided it would be a good idea to make kids that are all so different from each other run their own dorms and occasionally collaborate? Emphasis on the ‘different’ BTW.
In fact, Idia had just returned from a housewarden meeting the day the group was fully formed.
It had started out as a normal day in the game. Of course, that’s how all the other days started when they gained players. Idia was completing a task that actually gave him a decent amount of MagiCubes when he noticed two players repeatedly talking in the world chat. Idia ignored the two for a while, but by the time he finished his task, the two were still talking. A few players had told them to shut up. Curiosity getting the better of Idia once again, he decided to read what was going on.
Server chat:
R0YAL_FLUSH: Please, does anyone have any tips on how to beat the Morsobitus? @Lil-d3m0nic-mag3 and I have been trying and failing to beat it all week.
Lil-d3m0nic-mage3: If anyone can help, please give us pointers
“Ohhh, that’s rough.” Idia said with all the gamer sympathy he could muster. He remembered the first few times he tried to fight that thing. It took him forever to beat it. Still, asking a server full of gamers who could probably beat it in one or two attacks was not going to make you very popular. Not that either of the two noobs seemed to care.
Idia read a bit more of the messages and began to realize something about the two; they used proper grammar and punctuation. No acronym, no spelling errors, not even a misplaced comma. WTF?
So then, of course, Idia switched to his monitor with the Iris server pulled up and started off the first conversation of the day.
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Hellfire (you): KJHGFGHUJILHUKYGTFRTGHBJNKHF OMS PPLS I JUST SAW TWO HUMANS OF A VARIETY THAT I WAS SURE DIDN’T EXIST UNTIL NOW
Aphrodite: heterosexuals?
Hellfire (you): wha- no, aphrodite, u of all ppl should know heterosexuals are a myth
Mittens: i just woke up from my nap, wth is going on?
Hellfire (you): i js saw 2 ppl in the world game chat talking with PROPER GRAMMAR, NO ACRONYMS, PROPER CAPITALIZATION, SHIT LIKE THAT
Dumpling: ppl like that exist??
Kingpin: even I dont text like that
Aphrodite: same here
Mittens: which is surprising cus the stick shoved so far up aphrodites ass its waving out of his mouth
Aphrodite: i hope your vest loses all of its buttons
Mittens: i hope your foundation melts off your face
Kingpin: $20 says Aphrodite burns Mittens so badly we’re going to have to have grilled cat for dinner
Dumpling: XD also $25 says they’ll burn each other
Hellfire (you): fam this is abt to be rlly ooc of me, but i think we should invite them to join the group
Mittens: …
Dumpling: …
Kingpin: …
Aphrodite: …
Kingpin: hellfire are you sick?
Dumpling: WHO R U AND WAT HAVE U DONE WITH MY FREN??
Idia wasn’t really sure why he wanted to help those two noobs. They were wayyyyy below his level, not to mention probably uptight (at least the R0YAL_FLUSH guy seemed to be, based on his snap backs at people telling him to shut up).. Plus he hadn’t actually talked to them. He had no idea what they were like. It was probably pity he was feeling. Pity didn’t exactly fit the feeling he was feeling, Idia couldn’t think of any other reason why he would ask. Unless he actually wanted to make new friends and the urge was so foreign he just couldn’t recognize it, which was unlikely.
Hellfire (you): idk i kinda pity em tbh
Kingpin: i mean, Im okay with it if everyone else is
Dumpling: same!!
Aphrodite: im fine with it
Mittens: its alright, though we probably shouldn’t invite anymore ppl after this
Dumpling: why?
Mittens: well i mean team battles dont allow more than seven ppl to play, it would be kinda mean if someone had to watch everyone else play
Kingpin: okay, since when has Mittens thought of others??
Aphrodite: what is happening today…
Hellfire (you): his heart grew 3 sizes, trust
Mittens: stfu i can be nice when i want to be i just choose to be a bitch
Hellfire (you): a legendary choice frfr
Dumpling: invite them, hellfire!
Hellfire (you): ok
Right. Initiating conversation. Idia could do that. They clicked on Lil-d3m0nic-mage3’s character and started a private message to them. The screen separating them made it much easier for Idia to talk to people normally, and yet he still typed and deleted then retyped and deleted his message multiple times. Coming off as semi-normal was harder than he thought.
Eventually, Idia landed on a somewhat normal greeting.
Private chat with @Lil-d3m0nic-mag3:
-Cool_Beansss- (you): hi so i saw you and the other guy’s questions in the game chat. my frens and i r willing to help u newbies git gud and give u all the hacks u need. ill send an iris server join link if u all want to join. if u dont want to whatevs but eh
Before he could overthink it too much, Idia sent it. Fifteen minutes went by with no response, even though he could see the two were clearly online. His online friends in the Iris server were getting impatient.
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Dumpling: hellfire r they joining or noooo???
Kingpin: yeah its been a minute. did they agree to the terms?
Hellfire (you): no reply
Aphrodite: maybe they went offline
Hellfire: dude im staring at their characters in game rn
Mittens: whatever, lets just play
Just then, Idia got a chat notification from Lil-d3m0nic-mage3 in game.
Private chat with @Lil-d3m0nic-mag3:
Lil-d3m0nic-mag3: Sure.
Idia sent the link then typed out his reply.
-Cool_Beansss-: sick, send the link to @R0YAL_FLUSH while ur at it
Lil-d3m0nic-mag3: Alright.
While he waited, he messaged the Iris server chat, saying that they accepted the invite and to expect friend requests from them (if the noobs even knew how to do that). He got a range of ‘whatever’ and ‘yay!’ from the group. Then the noobs joined.
‘Untitled 1’ Iris server chat:
Rhyme has joined the chat
Magey has joined the chat
Rhyme: So, you’re all going to help us?
Magey: Thank you all very much for teaching us the gaming ways.
Dumpling: by the seven, u weren’t kidding hellfire
Hellfire: i told u
Rhyme: Pardon?
Mittens: hellfire told us abt 2 players who text with grammar and punctuation and shit
Rhyme: Language.
Aphrodite: okay, i like this one
Kingpin: heh of course you would
Magey: Why is that such a surprise? Is it uncommon for people to text following proper writing etiquette?
Mittens: forget texting like that, who talks like that??
Rhyme: Who talks to people they just met like that? It’s rude.
Aphrodite: it is, isn’t it?
Mittens: sybau aph
Aphrodite: 💖💖💖
Kingpin: i felt those sparkles through the screen-
Dumpling: anyways! Just a few things before we start, in dystopic mages, im -Chao$_Gr3mlin, kingpin is THE_C0N_IN_IC0N, mittens is BiG_CaTtY, aphrodite is fashi0n_divaaaa, and hellfire is -Cool_Beansss-. We’re all gonna hope you 2 dont ship nexie, and ages and pronouns if not too personal? Everyone here goes by he/him, except hellfire, they go by he/they. Kingpin and i r 16, aphrodite and hellfire r 18, and mittens is 20
Rhyme: My pronouns are he/him and I’m 16. And no, I do not ship Nexie.
Magey: I use he/him as well, and I’m 178 years old. I’ve never heard of this ‘Nexie’, but I suppose I will not ship it anywhere.
Idia couldn’t help but laugh. He assumed Magey’s ‘age’ was either a joke or misclick, but the fact he didn’t know what shipping meant? To be fair, some people seriously needed to go inside and touch some keyboard.
Dumpling: 178???
Mittens: ok grandpa
Kingpin: calm down, mittens, im sure our new friend here just made a typo
Magey: Ah, yes. Apologies. I’m 18.
Aphrodite: that makes more sense
Hellfire (you): also magey, to keep u from getting cancelled, when someone says they ship 2 ppl, they dont mean they want to ship them to the shaftlands or smth, they mean they want the them to be in a relationship. Usually romantic, and they’ll typically clarify if they mean anything else, k?
Magey: I see. In that case, I do not ship this ‘Nexie’ which I assume is Luxie and Nex. I do, however, ‘ship’ Luxie and Narsis.
“PLATONICALLY MARRY ME.” Was what Idia screamed at his screen when he read that. Luxsis had to be their OTP in Dystopic Mages. He’d been shipping it since they saw the two characters interact.
Dumpling: MY OTP MENTIONED???
Mittens: agreed
Kingpin: 👍
Aphrodite: this one is wise
Rhyme: I don’t particularly understand shipping characters, but I suppose I wouldn’t be opposed to those two getting together.
And by the sounds of it, everyone else was in agreement.
Hellfire (you): ily all platonically 😭
Dumpling: <3333
Kingpin: so what do you 2 like to do for fun?
Magey: I like observing gargoyles.
Mittens: how tf do u observe a gargoyle
Magey: Do not question it.
Mittens: …ok??
Dumpling: wbu rhyme?
Rhyme: I study.
Hellfire (you): bro thats lwk depressing
Rhyme: Excuse me?
Kingpin: what he means is do you do anything else for fun?
Rhyme: Well, since my school requires an extra curricular activity, I ride horses.
Dumpling: OMG THATS SO COOL
Magey: It really is.
Rhyme: Oh, um, thank you.
Aphrodite: anyways, u all needed help, correct?
Magey: Yes, we need help beating the Morsobitus.
Mittens: ugh that bish
Kingpin: that took me forever to beat
Dumpling: hey thats the monster u have to beat before u unlock team battles, right?
Hellfire (you): yerp
Dumpling: that means they can play with us once they beat it!
Normally Idia didn’t like playing with noobs. Their weak sauce character stats made it nearly impossible to get a W. But, these circumstances were different. Rhyme seemed uptight, and it would be really funny to ragebait him. And Magey? Eh. He liked gargoyles. Also Idia felt the need to educate Magey’s woefully uncultured ass before he thinks ‘being cooked’ means you are being actively burned alive.
Rhyme: Would that be alright with all of you? We don’t want to intrude.
Mittens: eh, i dont care
Kingpin: of course!
Aphrodite: if you two want to join then sure
Hellfire (you): i mean i invited yall, so-
Dumpling: its settled! Ur all staying :DD
Magey: Thank you all. Your generosity knows no bounds.
Mittens: take that back, my generosity absolutely knows its bounds
Magey: …Okay then.
Kingpin: i say we let hellfire teach them. Hes much better at gaming than any of us
His time had come.
Hellfire (you): first tip for beating the morsobitus is upping ur attack stats on ur team. Second tip: work on leveling up Trihan if u have him. Hes SUPER op and deals crazy damage. Also his health is great
Aphrodite: have u been waiting to rant about game strategies-
Hellfire (you): shut up and let me have this
Aphrodite: 🤐
Hellfire (you): ty, moving on-
Under Idia’s instruction, it only took Rhyme and Magey twenty minutes and two to three retries to beat Morsobitus. Idia figured this must be how parents feel after their children do well on a test.
Hellfire (you): im so proud 😭
Rhyme: We couldn’t have done it without you, Hellfire.
Magey: If I may ask, how are you so good at this game?
Hellfire (you): this group is my social life. apart from one club i do nuthin else except this
Rhyme: Wow.
Magey: That’s quite sad.
Mittens: pfffft-
Hellfire (you): after all i did, this is how im treated?? >:0
Magey: Forgive me, I didn’t mean to sound rude, but don’t you ever wish to have friends? I know I do.
Hellfire (you): not rlly. Also why is that actually kinda sad-
Dumpling: well looks like your wishes came true! We’re ur friends now and u cant get rid of us
Magey: We’re friends now?
Rhyme: I wasn’t aware becoming friends with someone was that easy.
Kingpin: with them it is, apparently. Took me a while to adjust too, but you’ll get used to it
Aphrodite: or u won’t
Mittens: im still not sure im fully adjusted and ive been here since the beginning
Rhyme: I see…
Dumpling: if u both beat morsobitus, that means u can do team battles now, yeah?
Magey: I believe so, yes.
Dumpling: great! Friend us all in game and then we can all play together!
It didn’t take long for the friend requests to come through. Idia accepted both of them, then joined the team battle Dumpling started. During that battle, Idia learned Rhyme and Magey weren’t actually that bad at the game. They were no where near Idia’s level, of course, but hey, that just meant they actually had a social life. The seven of them chatted in between battles. Turns out Rhyme was a highkey rager (Idia was surprised Rhyme wasn’t a ragequitter) and Magey was just happy as long as he was playing with them.
Rhyme: I WANT TO MAKE THAT MONSTER’S HEAD ROLL.
Hellfire (you) 🫴👑 i give this to u
Rhyme: …What?
Hellfire (you): its the gamer rager crown. I dont deserve it anymore 🙇
Rhyme: Oh… thank you, I guess? Anyways, I unfortunately have to leave now.
Dumpling: thats alr!! I should prolly get going, too. I wanna take a walk outside
Magey: We should all probably take a break from the screens, shouldn’t we?
Kingpin: good idea, we’ve been playing nonstop for two hours
Aphrodite: yeah
Hellfire (you): lol losers/jk. Ttyl
Everyone said their goodbyes and one by one went offline, except Idia of course. He was hardly ever offline. He grinned to himself as he gambled. The group had finally been fully assembled. After playing for a moment, his gaze drifted to the monitor with the open chat.
He stared at their chat for a while, thinking about it. Something was wrong… no not wrong, just missing? Then it hit him - the server had no name. This entire time it had just been ‘Untitled 1’. He could either keep it at that or he could change it to whatever he pleased. There no one to tell him no, and even if there was they could suck it because he created the server. He thought about it for around two minutes before deciding:
The Friendly Demons 👹.
Was there any reason behind it? No. They were all somewhat friendly and somewhat demonic. It described the seven of them well enough.
The next day, everyone logged back on and were all immediately greeted with the wonderful new group name.
‘The Friendly Demons 👹’ Iris server chat:
Mittens: hellfire. What. the. Fuck.
Hellfire (you): gm mittens 😊
Aphrodite: what in the name of the seven is that godsforsaken group name?
Magey: It is rather… different?
Rhyme: Magey, be honest, it’s blasphemous.
Dumpling: i like it!!
Hellfire (you): ty, dumpling. Even if yall dont like it idrc, were now the friendly demons. End of discussion.
Kingpin: well hes not wrong. I would consider myself a friendly demon to some extent ^^
Aphrodite: we all know that, kingpin
Rhyme: They’re not going to change it, are they?
Magey: Most likely not.
Mittens: too tired to care rn
Dumpling: its settled then! We’re the friendly demons!!!
Hellfire (you): eheh
And that is the tale of how ‘The Friendly Demons 👹’ came to be.
☆ ☆ ☆
Back to the present…
Idia managed to endure half the school day. There were no tests to go in for, but he still wasn’t sure his stamina bar would make it through first period, but by some miracle, he reached the halfway checkpoint (lunch). With a sigh of relief, he pulled out a cup of instant noodles from his drawer (he keeps them there in case of emergencies, don’t ask) and walked over to the sink to fill it with water. He turned the water off once it reached the fill line, then put it in the microwave.
While he waited for the noodles to cook - boil? - he pulled out his phone and scrolled his Magicam feed. It was mostly memes about the games he plays, cosplays, some of those videos that were so oddly relatable they made you want to check for stalkers, and much rarely but occasionally none of the above.
He came across one post about LuxSis (the obviously superior Lux ship) and sent it in the group chat. Sometimes he wished he would be able to show all of them the edits, memes, and posts he sent them in real life, but he was sure that would never be possible. After all, the seven of them lived in totally different places and they didn’t plan to meet each other IRL for safety reasons.
Unbeknownst to Idia, six phones in Night Raven College buzzed with that chat notification.