Chapter Text
Timeskip to the end of the year…………..
_Sharpshooter_: Hey Keith, when's your birthday?
Keith_Kogane: October 23rd. So you're winging the final?
It was the middle of IFF (fighter fundamentals) and everyone was stressing out about end of the year exams. Lance however was not too worried, he and Keith were at the top of their class, in more ways than one. Keith had advanced much farther than Lance in their self defense course, and Lance was at the top of the leaderboard on almost every shooting game the Garrison had to offer. Lance was actually getting a little worried about Keith's progress, if he ever got into a fight Lance might have to start helping the other kid. Hunk was a really accomplished engineer and his fighting skills were getting better and better. Lance tried to convince him to shoot with him, but Hunk didn’t like the noises. Or the thought of shooting something. And Lance didn’t have the heart to push him.
Was it morally ethical to train your friends for war without them knowing? Probably not. But Lance was more concerned about getting them to live than how angry they would be at him. And trust him, he was very concerned about how angry they would be with him if they found out.
But currently, he was more concerned about Shiro, Matt, and Pidge's dad.
The Garrison had already announced the kerberos mission, to visit one of Pluto's icy moons. Yeah. And Keith was going to- he was going to lose another father figure. Brother figure? He was going to lose a Shiro. Lance could already feel the second-hand heartbreak. And the first-hand heart break. Lance had known Shiro for ten years and a year on top of that if he counted the second life he was living. Lance couldn’t tell if it was worse to worry about what could be happening to Shiro, or to know exactly what Shiro was going to have to go through and not know what to do about it. Shiro had to go, or Pidge would never be able to join the Garrison, but that felt so selfish.
Shiro was going to be- he was going to go through unimaginable things. No matter what Lance did, he couldn’t think of a way to justify it. Do the ends justify the means? Of course not, but what could Lance do about it realistically? If Lance put a tracker under Shiro's skin, the Galra would tear it out. If Lance sabotaged the mission, he would be caught, Shiro would hate him, Keith would hate him, Pidge would never come, and the mission would be back up within days.
Needless to say, Lance's mental state was at a record low. What could a fourteen year old do to stop the Garrison? The world most recognized space organization ever?
He could feel his eyes begin to water. He couldn’t do this in class. He had to take everything one step at a time. For example giving Keith something else to look forward to for summer. So when Shiro went missing, Lance could distract him from it. He’d eat sushi at every birthday for his whole life if it meant it would make this summer a little easier for Keith.
_Sharpshooter_: Aren't you also winging the final?
Keith_Kogane: Yeah. Wanna play games?
_Sharpshooter_: Arn’t you gonna ask me when my birthday is?
Keith_Kogane: July 23.
Lance blinked. His previously aching heart was touched, since when did Keith know stuff like that?
_Sharpshooter_: HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?
Keith_Kogane: I think you mentioned it at some point.
_Sharpshooter_: You remembered that?
Keith_Kogane: Yeah. Wanna play games?
Lance rolled his eyes. Lance had shown Keith a better way to waste class time recently, the only game website that got past Garrison computer firewalls. And Keith was practically addicted to the competitions he and Lance would get into on the computers. One time Keith had a faulty keyboard and he lost the little race they were playing. He damn near threw the computer, Lance swore he’d never seen Keith so red. Lance almost made a red lion joke before he caught himself.
_Sharpshooter_: Someone just can’t get enough of eating my dirt
Keith_Kogane: You want to take another look at that scoreboard?
In all honesty Keith won most of the time, Lance just liked to tease. As Keith had learned in their time together, he didn’t have to take Lance's jabs to heart. Keith was less likely to get mad at Lance now. He had developed a resistance to Lance's shenanigans and by proxy, other people. Keith was calmer, when his classmates interacted with him he…didn’t get annoyed. Keith was adapting to being more sociable? It seemed he didn’t hate everyone, he just didn’t understand everyone else. There was this disconnect between what Keith knew and what everyone else knew that made it difficult for him to understand them. Probably because they lived such different lives, and Keith couldn’t relate to them. Lance seemed to have bridged that gap.
Lance felt someone tap on his shoulder
A blonde girl held up her computer to him shyly. She reminded Lance of Romelle. “Hey you know this stuff right? Could you explain this to me?”
It was some girl from the back of the class Lance hadn’t seen very much. Because he and Keith were notoriously top of the class, people tried to ask them for help. Well now it was just Lance because Keith would just say no. And the people who didn’t know what they were doing reminded Lance of himself at this time of the year in his past life. It sucked to feel stupid and small. So he helped whenever he could.
“Sure thing, just a sec ok Keith?”
Lance had observed that Keith behavior towards people nowadays was better, great even. Amazing progress. So he couldn’t explain the sudden switch. Keith was giving the poor girl a chilling glare, It was brutal.
She snapped her computer shut. “I mean, you look busy I’ll just ask someone else- sorry,”
Lance tried to mediate the situation, “No, it's alright! You can...and she's gone. Keith, what's up with you?”
“Nothing. Why?” Keith’s voice made Lance pause. He sounded completely genuine.
Lance narrowed his eyes. “You gave her the stink eye.”
Keith frowned. “No, I didn’t.”
“Keith, I saw you.”
“…I didn’t realize I was doing that.” Keith’s brows pulled together, looking almost as confused as Lance felt.
Lance let out a short laugh. “Really? Because it was brutal.”
Keith blinked, still looking mildly disturbed by this revelation. “Huh. Wanna—”
“Yes, I do,” Lance cut in, already knowing what he meant. “But you have to remember to watch your face.”
Keith gave him a flat look. “You should remember to— never mind.”
He turned slightly away, crossing his arms, but not before Lance caught the faint pink creeping across his ears.
Lance leaned closer. “What is it?”
“Nothing.”
Lance rolled his eyes. “You are acting so weird.”
Keith didn’t seem to hear him. He stared ahead, somewhere deep in his own thoughts, arms still crossed tightly over his chest. Under his breath, almost like he hadn’t meant to say it out loud, he muttered, “I was here first…”
Lance blinked. “What does that even mea—”
“Keith and Lance?”
Their teacher’s voice cut sharply across the room.
Both of them looked up.
She sat at her desk at the front of the classroom, somehow having caught every word despite the low voices. “People are trying to study. I said talking was only allowed if it was for studying.”
Lance slumped back in his seat. Honestly, all the Garrison teachers had superhearing. It was the only explanation.
So Lance and Keith went back to pretending to study, which really meant half-heartedly flipping through their work while playing bootleg flight games whenever the teacher wasn’t looking. But Keith’s attitude kept nagging at Lance. Okay, maybe nagging was putting it lightly—it bothered him a lot. Did Keith seriously think he was somehow better than that girl just because she had asked a question? Come on. It reminded Lance of all the reasons he’d clashed with Keith when they’d first met.
He didn’t still think Keith saw himself as better than everyone else—not anymore—but what had just happened left Lance unsure.
So Lance and Keith got back to pretending to study by playing bootleg flight games. Keith's attitude somewhat bothered Lance. Ok maybe a lot bothered. Did Keith think he was somehow better than that girl because she asked a question? Come on! It reminded Lance of his initial issues with Keith. Lance didn’t think Keith thought he was better than everyone else now, but what just happened made him unsure. Maybe Lance’s new flight prowess was making Keith forget that not everyone moved through things with the same natural talent he did.
Heck, Lance didn’t have talent. He had fear and obsession. Lance was pretty sure the only reason he got good at flying in his past life was because of the war and a healthy fear of being left behind.
Lance sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. His cholesterol must be unnaturally high for a fifteen year old boy. He wondered if it would affect how he would look later in life, maybe he’d get more wrinkly this time around from all the pre-mature stress.
Lance shook his head at the thought. He had to bring as much bb-cream as he could with him in space.
He had started packing for the trip to space already. Mostly media, he’d downloaded many many things into hard drives and shoved them into one mega hard drive, courtesy of Hunk. And Lance had been asking Hunk and Keith what their favorite things were so they would have a bit of home in space. Or at least things they loved in Keith's case.
He had mentioned to Lance once towards the end of the war, he didn’t experience a lot of homesickness in space. He only missed earth a little, because the realest family he’d ever had was here in space. He’d actually feel more homesick on Earth. Lance smiled at the bittersweet thought, it seemed space wouldn’t be so hard on Keith.
Lance on the other hand was pretty sure he was going to have a panic attack the second he got there. But before he could think about that, class ended. Keith won 0-3 that class period. Because in a month, he was going to lose everything. Lance was just glad Keith had some friends this time around.
…….
Shiro had told Keith when takeoff was scheduled so he could say goodbye. Even though the launch time was classified, Keith had told Hunk and Lance anyway. Hunk, of course, immediately started firing off questions.
“Keith, is there any way you can get us in? They’re going to be heroes when they come back—I have to see that ship.” By now, Hunk had gotten comfortable enough around Keith to grab him by the shoulders and shake him dramatically.
Keith had really mellowed out. A few months ago, he probably would’ve shrugged Hunk off or tensed. Instead, he just laughed.
“Sorry, guys. Family only.” He gave Hunk an apologetic look before adding, “I’ll take pictures if I can, though. Maybe you two can walk with me to the gate?”
Lance pretended not to be interested in the conversation, but the truth was that he just couldn’t bear to listen to it. He didn’t want to be near that ship. He didn’t want to go to the gate and see Pidge in her purple dress wishing her family goodbye, and he didn’t want to see Shiro anywhere near it.
“It’s alright I have something that day I mean- you should focus on Shiro. Maybe we can meet up with you afterwards?” Lance said, looking away.
Hunk scratched his chin, “Really Lance? This is like exactly your sorta thing, I would’ve thought you’d be all over Keith right now to-”
“HE-HEY HUNK SHUT UP WOULD YA? THAT”D BE GREAT THANKS” Lance covered Hunk's mouth with his hand and Hunk licked it. Lance screamed and wiped it on Hunk's shirt in response, to which Hunk did not budge.
“I have siblings too Lance don’t even man. Anyway, maybe Lance is right. This is the last time you’re going to see Shiro for months, so you should focus on him. After all, you're gonna have us forever! We can meet up for ice cream after.” Hunks positivity never failed to make Lance ease up. Except for when he ventured too close to the truth about his feelings for Keith.
“I’m good with ice cream,” Keith said casually. Lance liked the expression on his face because Keith looked genuinely happy. He couldn’t remember ever seeing it on a Keith so young. And maybe selfishly, Lance liked thinking he might’ve had something to do with it.
…..
Launch day came and went, and Lance never made it to the ice cream place.
He’d faked sick that morning, curling into his bed while the rest of the world kept moving without him. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking. He tried to steady them by writing—logging memory after memory into his tablet, stacking details on top of each other like if he just got enough of it down, it might make sense. It didn’t.
He’d run through every possible version of events in his head, over and over, searching for a way out. There wasn’t one. The Kerberos mission had to happen. It needed to happen.
He hated it.
Lancd didn’t remember falling asleep, but he must have. The tablet was still clutched to his chest when the dreams came.
Not dreams. Memories.
The warcamps. The people they’d freed. The ones they hadn’t gotten to in time. Faces, voices, the hollow look in someone’s eyes when they’d already been through too much. Shiro's face. His arm. His hair.
Lance woke up in a cold sweat, he didn’t have to pretend to be sick anymore.
He vomited. He barely made it to the bathroom before he got sick, the world tilting under him. When it was over, he just stayed there for a second, breathing hard, forehead pressed against the cool wall.
When he made it back to bed, he didn’t try to stop the tears.
They came quietly at first, then all at once. He buried his face in his pillow, shoulders shaking, and let it happen. It hurt, but there was something relieving about it too.
By the time Hunk got back, Lance felt hollowed out. Like someone had scooped everything out of him and left him there.
He barely registered the door opening, the familiar footsteps.
“Hey, Lance?” Hunk’s voice was careful, “You alive, buddy? I got you some stuff from the nurse—tummy medicine. How’re you holding up? Have you eaten?”
The worry in his voice made Lance flinch, but he couldn’t find the energy to respond.
Hunk left.
For a second, Lance thought maybe he’d imagined him. But then the door opened again. Hunk came back, a little out of breath, carrying a bowl.
“I made mac and cheese,” came the voice of an angel. Lance nearly burst into tears again.
Lance managed to sit up. His hands still trembled, but Hunk stayed close. He held the bowl while Lance took a few slow bites. It was warm. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was until then.
Somewhere in the quiet between bites and sips, something inside Lance eased. Just a little.
He looked at Hunk, really looked at him, and felt something tight in his chest twist.
“I… thank you, Hunk.”
Hunk blinked, then huffed out a breath. “Jesus Christ, that’s the first time I’ve heard your voice all day. You must be really sick.”
“Why?” Lance muttered, a faint edge slipping into his voice. “Because I usually don’t shut up?”
The words came out sharper than he meant, but Hunk didn’t pull away.
“Lance,” he said gently, “you know I didn’t mean it like that. I just… I missed your voice.”
Lance swallowed, guilt settling heavy in his stomach.
“Keith’s worried about you, too.”
The name hit like a truck.
Lance flinched, shoulders tensing. “Don’t let him in. Please.”
Hunk frowned. “What? Why? Did you guys have another fight?”
“No, it’s not like that.” Lance’s grip tightened on the edge of the blanket. “I just… I need to be alone right now.”
That wasn’t the whole truth, and they both knew it.
He couldn’t face Keith. Not the way Keith would look at him. hopeful, determined, talking about the mission like Shiro was going to come back. Not when Lance knew what was coming. Not when he knew he couldn’t stop it.
….
Lance stayed there for two days until he finally got out of bed. He got strange looks in the halls, probably because he looked like shit. If not for his uniform, Lance suspected he would look even worse. Even Keith treaded carefully around him. Somewhat anyway.
“Lance? Are you better now? You look like shit,” Keith dropped his stuff right next to Lance's desk. Very optimistic words to hear first thing in the morning.
Lance let a grin stretch across his face. “You don’t look so bad yourself, Keithy-boy.”
Keith huffed softly. “That’s a new one.”
He spared Lance a quick glance before looking away—then looked back. This time, he didn’t stop at Lance’s face. His eyes lingered as they caught on the loose curls falling around Lance’s forehead. He stared with quiet, almost baffled focus. He was trying to make sense of something he hadn’t expected.
“…You curled your hair?”
Lance ran his fingers through it, absently tugging at one of the strands. He had showered earlier, but for once he hadn’t bothered styling it the way he usually did.
“Oh, yeah.” He pinched a curl between his fingers and rolled it. “I straighten it after every shower. It’s naturally curly, but I usually like how it looks straight.”
Keith hummed, still staring.
Not politely staring either. Fully, openly studying it. Hadn’t he ever heard about the three-second stare rule?
His gaze followed the curl Lance let spring back into place, Lance had to bite back a smirk. Sometimes he forgot Keith was half-cat. His curiosity right now seemed positively feline.
Thankfully, Lance had developed a decent outward resistance to Keith’s accidentally adorable habits. Internally, though, his heart still fluttered in deeply inconvenient ways.
“You wanna touch it?” Lance whispered like he was offering some highly classified secret.
He gave Lance a withering glare, “Why would I want to do that?”
Lance smirked. “You’re totally staring at it. It’s not alien, y’know.”
You are, Lance thought idly.
“I never said that.” Keith crossed his arms, but his attention flicked right back to Lance’s hair despite himself. “I just— I’ve never seen it like that before.”
Lance arched a brow.
Keith exhaled through his nose, like forcing the words out was physically irritating. “It’s good.”
Lance’s grin widened. “So you like it better curly?”
Keith’s jaw tightened. He looked away for a second, then back again, gaze landing back on Lance's hair.
“It looks fine no matter what, okay?”
Lance snorted. “Hm. That’s the correct answer, Keithy-boy. You just won a ticket to the chocolate factory.”
Keith blinked. “What are you talking about?”
“Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Oh, come on, Keith. Have you ever seen a TV before? Or read a book? It’s the twenty-second century, goddamnit.”
Keith muttered something under his breath that Lance was pretty sure was an insult, but there was no bite in it.
All in all, Lance was able to steel his nerves again. Crying wouldn’t do anyone any good. Keith, Hunk, and Lance had a classic movie marathon night for Keith, and Lance enjoyed those moments. Making excuses to inch as close to Keith on the bed as he could, much to Hunk’s chagrin. If Lance focused too much on the future, he realized he would lose his mind. He had to be patient and make the most of what he had, while he still had it.
……
Lance had underestimated how quickly the Kerberos mission would go wrong. He could’ve sworn he still had another month before the M.I.A. announcements hit.
Instead, it happened at lunch.
The overhead screens mounted in the corners of the hall flickered, cutting through the usual noise of trays scraping and students talking over each other. The update on the Kerberos mission made the cafeteria hall go silent. For one second, time stood still.
The next, Keith dropped everything and ran.
His chair slammed backward hard enough to screech across the floor. His tray clattered, food scattering uselessly across the tile, but Keith didn’t even glance back. He tore through the lunch hall like something had split open inside him.
“Keith—!”
Lance shoved himself up so fast his knee cracked against the table. He began running after Keith immediately.
But Keith on adrenaline was something else entirely. He was a force of nature.
He drove through crowds like a hurricane, shoulders slamming into people, doors flying open hard enough to rattle against their hinges. But Keith didn’t hear any of it. He just kept going, breathing sharp and ragged, moving like if he stopped for even a second something irreversible would happen.
Lance barely kept him in sight.
Only when Keith veered toward the pilot access wing did Lance’s stomach drop.
Oh no.
He had no idea what Keith thought he was going to do there. Demand answers? Steal a ship? Find someone to scream at until they told him Shiro wasn’t gone? Keith hit the secured doors hard enough to make them shudder.
Then stopped. His hands flew to his pockets. Nothing. His expression twisted. He had left his access card in his backpack.
“FUCK!”
Keith slammed his fist into the metal door with enough force to make Lance flinch. The impact rang through the corridor like a gunshot. His chest was heaving, shoulders trembling so violently Lance thought he might crumble right then and there.
Lance’s own heart pounded so hard it hurt. This felt like stepping barefoot into a minefield.
Carefully, Lance sidestepped closer and scanned the spare access card Keith had given him weeks ago from his pocket.
Keith whipped toward him. His eyes were huge. Wild. The purple in his irises looked darker somehow, sharp and glass-bright under the fluorescent lights. Realization dawned upon Lance in that moment. Keith didn’t look angry. He looked terrified.
Lance swallowed hard.
“Where are we going?”
“Adam…Adam” Keith's voice cracked on the name.
Lance felt something twist painfully in his chest.
Keith wasn’t thinking straight. But he was grateful Keith hadn’t said something impossible—The Admiral. Shiro. Space. Fix it.
Lance nodded once, steadying himself even though he felt anything but steady.
“Okay,” he said softly. “Adam.”
…
Adam wasn’t in his room, Lance asked pilots around and they all pointed…to the Admirals office. Keith bolted before Lance could get a word in edgewise. In the center of the pilots area was the Admiral of the Garrison. The C.E.O essentially. Lance had never met her in person, but it seemed that was about to change.
When they reached the lobby, they were told to have a seat. Keith took it better than Lance expected.
“Have a seat? Have a seat? Listen-Shiro is- I have to talk to the-” Keith was practically over the counter before Lance put a hand on his shoulder.
Lance pushed as much comfort in his tone as he could, “Adams is in there talking to the Admiral right now, he’s going to tell us everything. I promise,”
Keith shook off Lance's hand but sat down nonetheless. In the quiet, Lance could hear the sound of Adam yelling at the Admiral. The clock on the wall ticking, and Keith's leg is fidgeting.
Lance almost couldn’t believe his eyes.
A fiery woman burst through the doors and immediately subjected the woman at the front desk to the same frantic assault Keith had unleashed earlier, demanding answers. Her voice cut through the thick silence.
And behind her, a young girl walked in.
Matt brown hair. Wet cheeks. A purple dress.
She held her own arms as she walked, like she was trying to keep herself together through sheer force. She was just a kid.
Pidge.
She and Lance locked eyes for a brief, aching moment before Lance looked away.
Keith watched the woman tear into the desk attendant with something ugly and restless in his expression. Most likely jealousy. Or maybe just desperation that she was allowed to be louder than he had been.
Finally, Adam opened the Admiral’s door.
The entire room seemed to tighten.
His face was dark, grief carved deep into his cheeks. His chest rose and fell unevenly, like breathing itself had become work. His eyes flickered dangerously across the room before settling on them.
Suddenly, Lance felt horribly out of place. He was the only one there who wasn’t family.
“Colleen,” Adam said, his voice rough. “Come in.” His eyes shifted. “Keith? Go home.”
Keith shot to his feet.
“No!” The word cracked out of him. “I’ve been waiting here this whole time—I found out in the goddamn cafeteria! I deserve to know. Tell me. I need to be there—”
It was a visceral sight.
The room felt thick with agony, suffocating and heavy enough to choke on.
Lance wasn’t sure he could take it.
Pidge—Kate—collapsed to her knees. A sob tore out of her so violently Lance’s stomach twisted. She folded in on herself, crying so hard it sounded like the grief was being ripped straight out of her.
Adam crossed the room in two strides and grabbed Keith by the shoulders.
“KEITH, LISTEN TO ME!” His voice broke against the walls. “For once in your life, help me! I can’t-”
His grip tightened.
“I can’t. Not right now so please. Just… please.”
Keith shoved him off.
Hard.
Then he turned and kicked the exit door open hard enough that it slammed against the wall.
Lance couldn’t hear whatever Keith spat back at Adam, he could’ve sworn it sounded like a growl, but then Keith was gone.
Lance followed him out.
“Keith—”
“Don’t follow me.”
He said coldly. Lance froze.
“…Okay.”
He stepped back. Then slowly walked the other direction, glancing over his shoulder a healthy number of times, in case Keith might call him back.
He didn’t. He stalked down the hallway. Lance wondered if he should push. Or if Keith would break at the slightest touch.
He really didn’t want to leave him alone right now.
But Keith had told him to go, so he did.
….
Lance didn’t see Keith for three days.
Finally he and Hunk knocked on his dorm. It occurred to Lance he’d never been here before, he had never seen Keith's roommate.
An unfamiliar face opened the door, he looked sort of similar to Keith. He had black hair and black eyes with a glint of red in the iris. He carried himself with dignity and he had no discernible expression on his face.
“Hello.” The boy said plainly.
Lance and Hunk blinked, finally Lance cleared his throat. “Hello I’m Lance and this is Hunk, we’re Keith's friends and we’re looking for him. Is he here?”
Hunk stretched out a hand to the boy “What's your name?”
The boy shook Hunks hand accordingly. “I’m Ivan, I thought he was with you. Keith hasn’t been here for three days.”
Lance ran his fingers through his hair, “Fuck, thank you. Um, we have to go. If he comes back here could you message me? I’m Lance Mcclain,”
Ivan nodded “I will, but I don’t think he’ll come back”
“What, why?”
“He took his things with him.”
Ivan opened the rest of the door and revealed that what should’ve been Keith's half of the room was empty. The covers of the bed were gone, his clothes were gone, all of it. Anxiety began to rise in Lance's chest.
Ok calm down Lance, he’s either with Adam, at the shack, or in another state by now. Fuck.
Lance put his hands on Hunks shoulders for stability, “Hunk? Can you- ok um. I don’t know what to do. Well I do, I’m gonna check the shack and you’re going to ask the teachers about Adam. Don’t let people know he’s missing though got it?”
Hunk blinked “Y-yeah I got it, but why? If he’s really run off we have to let people know to look for him right?”
Lance shook his head “If he’s just at the shack we’ll have made a big deal for nothing. And I don’t want him to get in trouble for this, he’s already going through enough. We’ll do it ourselves first.”
Slowly, Hunk nodded “Ok, we got this. Keep your phone on you. I'll text you if I find anything.”
Lance gave Hunk one last smile before running off to make his way to the dumpster. He was really glad he and Keith got Lance another keycard. If Keith was the only one who could get out of the Garrison undetected Lance would go crazy with worry. For example, in an instance like this where Keith had apparently been missing for three days and Lance had no clue. God what the hell was he thinking? How could Lance not check on him for three days? Fuck!
Once Lance made it past the dumpster gate, he was faced with a wide open desert. Dirt on all sides and the blazing sun setting fire to his hair. Which way was it again?
Lance closed his eyes and went back to his first memory of Keith taking him out here the first time and holding Lance's hand for the first time…Jesus Christ he was not paying attention to where he was going. But thankfully, recently Lance had come to notice something about his mind. His memory was super-natural. On top of the ten years he could remember perfectly, his mind was getting extremely good at memory recall. Is this what a photographic memory was? It was completely counteracting his usual forgetful nature.
Or is this how people who don’t have adhd remember things? Did the universe give me magic adderall memory? Lance's mind was jumping from thought to thought as he took the journey to Keith's shack memory by memory. He realized he was distracting himself from his own worry, but he couldn’t help it.
Eventually, a small brown shack was in his line of sight, and thankfully a red hoverbike was there too. Keith had not run off to a different state. Lance ran over and nearly bust the door down, but he calmed down and knocked before opening the door.
“Keith? Are you here?” The house was so quiet, Lance's voice felt like a bull in a china shop. He wanted to whisper, but he had to know if Keith was here.
“...Lance? What are you doing here?” Keith's raspy voice came from a room off to the side. He sounded like he’d been yelling a lot.
Lance's heart fell in relief, his knees felt normal again.
“Me and Hunk came to check on you but you weren't in your dorm so I came here to see you…”
Lance opened a door and found a room with a bed that looked too small for Keith, a brown nightstand and a lamp. The painted purple and blue galaxy walls were chipping, and the wooden floors were worn down.
…Keith grew up in here. Lance ignored the tug at his heart strings. There were bigger fish to fry.
Keith was sitting on the bed still in uniform from school, his shoes were thrown aside and his black hair was a mess. He had a blanket loosely wrapped around him just covering his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t moved or eaten in days. Lance couldn’t judge, he had been in a similar state just a little while ago.
Lance exhaled a breath he didn’t know he was holding and got down on one knee in front of Keith's bed, gently, careful not to provoke him.
“...Hey Keith, do you have some clothes around here? Maybe something more comfortable than your uniform? And can I use your kitchen and make you some food?”
Keith sluggishly lifted the blanket hood off his face. His pale cheeks were damp with tears.
“Why do you even bother with me Lance?”
“What? I care about you, you’re my friend-”
“But why? I’m the reason you have no friends in our grade, because everyone hates me and you by association, I completely yelled at you and I ignored you a bunch of times. I’m more trouble than it's worth. Why are you still here?”
Lance sighed, how could he explain love to Keith? No one could explain why they loved anyone. They just did. That was probably the scary part to Keith. If Lance's care stood on nothing, if there was no solid ground on which Keith could depend Lance would stay, how could he let himself trust Lance? Keith would lose yet another person and his heart would finally give out.
Lance's vision became blurry, a drop rolled down his face.
“Keith, I don’t know how to explain it to you. I can promise you however, I will never ever leave you alone. No matter what life throws at you or me, they could throw us both into a war and I would still never leave you alone. I’ve had worse fights with my siblings than I’ve ever had with you and I love them to the moon and back. So what makes you think a little yelling and ignoring will push me away? My sister tried to kill me once!”
A broken laugh escaped Keith's lips, Lance relished in the sound. Keith's eyes were swimming with tears, the shine of his tears looked like stars in his galaxy eyes.
“I’m probably the most persistent person you’ll ever meet, if you want me to leave? It’ll be up to you, but I promise you- I really really promise you with the kind of certainty no one had ever promised you anything before: We’re going to be together for as long as you want. If you want.” Lance felt out of breath after saying all that, but it was worth it. He could only hope he said the right words.
“So please, let me stay a while longer?”
Keith’s eyes locked onto Lance with an intensity that felt almost startling, raw emotion flashing across his face so openly it nearly stole the air from the room. There was something so fierce in the set of his jaw, something unwavering. Lance had never seen him look like that before.
Keith looked away, dragging a hand over his eyes as if trying to steady whatever had risen too quickly inside him. Quietly, Lance pulled the blanket back over Keith’s head, helping him hide his face.
And because Lance didn’t want Keith to see his face. Gosh he thought he had grown resistant to Keith but he couldn’t bear to see him like that. Lance wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or kiss him.
“I-I’ll be back with something to eat ok? Try and find something comfy to wear, please”
Lance shut the door behind him gently, and made his way to the kitchen. It was kind of a mess, but that could be dealt with later. Right now he needed to find food. Lance opened the fridge and found three eggs that didn’t look totally expired. Lance shot Hunk a quick text telling him he and Keith were at the shack, and he began picking up a pan.
I can work with this.
…..
Lance knocked on Keith's door with a plate in hand.
“...come in,” Keith murmured.
Lance opened the door, Keith was wearing hippo pants and a grey shirt much too big on him. It could only belong to his late father or Shiro. The hippo pants only reached his upper calf, like Keith had outgrown them long ago.
Lance sat down next to Keith tentatively, “I made you an omelette! You didn’t have cheese but I found salt and butter so it's the same thing. Have some?”
Keith nodded and began eating the eggs. Lance smiled at the sight. Lance took the time to examine the room more closely, there were a few constellation books lying around, and in a corner was a large trashbag, presumably full of the clothes and things he used to keep in his dorm. Lance didn’t see any toys; he could only hope they had simply been put away somewhere, but Lance did see a Hippo plushie on Keith's bed.
If Keith was feeling better he would’ve wanted to tease him about it. But then again maybe a bit of normalcy would make Keith feel better.
“Hey Keith, who's that?” Lance nodded to the plushie and smiled softly.
“...He’s my old stuffed animal. I used to call him Mr. Hippo,” Keith said.
“Hes cute. Did you like hippos when you were little? You also have Hippo pants on.”
Keith looked at his pants. “Yeah, I thought they were cool.”
“Why?”
“Because they are, they're huge but they’re fast too so they can hunt. And they’re super strong too. And…yeah. Thanks for coming.”
Lance smiled. “Of course, I don’t think Mr.Hippo could reach the counter to make you eggs.” Lance said, bumping Keith's shoulder. Keith's lips quirked up at Lance's statement.
Lance flushed slightly and rubbed the back of his neck “A-Also Hunk texted me that you’re exempt from school for the next four days. Which is dumb because your grades are perfect so you should just get an early summer, but I just wanted to let you know.”
“I’ll go back tomorrow."
“What? Why? Keith you should rest-”
“Shiro wouldn’t like it if I missed. He worked really hard to help me. I can’t waste it.”
Lance sucked in a breath. “...Ok, but you’re still granted at least four skip days. If you need them. But I get you, we can go back tonight.”
“Ok. Thanks”
“Anytime mullet”
“Its not even that long”
“I’ll be the judge of that thankyouverymuch,”
Lance and Keith spent the rest of the night talking about small, mindless things, whatever drifted into Lance’s head. Keith humored Lance's thoughts without complaint. They let the conversation wander anywhere except for Shiro. Neither of them brought up Shiro. Keith had always been good at burying things deep enough to leave them untouched, and though Lance knew that habit would someday come back to haunt him, tonight wasn’t the night to dig any of it up. For now, summer stretched ahead of them, but Shiro would be back by next semester. Keith only had to make it through until then. And somehow, with the quiet hum of Lance beside him and the night slowly fading around them, that didn’t feel quite as impossible.