Chapter Text
Ever since Jackie was four years old, the Taylors spent summers at their lake house in northern New Jersey. Ever since she was eight years old, Shauna had come with them. The lake house was special, and not just because it was a beautiful white cottage on an even more beautiful lake. It meant three months with Shauna’s undivided time, and something only they shared. That was until this summer, the summer going into their senior year of high school. Rather than a summer with just Shauna to keep her company, this year Jackie would have another guest: Natalie Scattorcio. In the spring of their junior year, Natalie’s dad died in a freak accident. Nobody at school really knew what happened, except for maybe Kevyn Tan, but he wasn’t exactly the town gossip. Natalie’s mother was never all there when her husband was around, so she was far from a parental figure after his death. Word got around to the parents, at least the teams’ parents, and Ms. Shipman was quick to offer her support. Natalie moved in with Shauna and her mom for the last month of school and the foreseeable future. Jackie wasn’t exactly thrilled to hear that meant Natalie was going to be joining them for the summer, but her parents and Ms. Shipman had arranged it before she could protest. Jackie had never got along very well with Natalie, but she was willing to make an effort if she was spending the summer with her. Plus, she didn’t have an option.
“Jaqueline, we were supposed to leave ten minutes ago!” Mrs. Taylor shouted from downstairs.
Normally Jackie would have been waiting eagerly in the car hours before they needed to leave, but not this summer. She was slightly uncomfortable with how much she wanted to be alone with Shauna at the lake, but it was probably just because Natalie wouldn’t be her first pick as a third friend on the trip. But alas, these were her summer plans whether she liked it or not. So, she headed downstairs with the last of her bags and climbed into the backseat.
When they arrived at Shauna’s, Ms. Shipman was waiting on the front step with both girls on either side of her. Shauna looked excited, she always loved any chance to leave Wiskayok, and Natalie was looking much less excited but not totally pissed off.
“You’re going to just love it up there, Natalie!” Ms. Shipman exclaimed as she helped load up the car.
“Yeah, and I might even come back to Wiskayok with table manners,” Natalie teased.
Ms. Shipman laughed, and Mrs. Taylor found it much less amusing. Shauna shot Jackie an apologetic look, as if it was her fault Natalie wasn’t to the Taylors’ pristine standards.
“Ready for another summer, Shipman?” Jackie asked, slinging an arm around the brunette.
“Always am,” Shauna replied with a half-smile.
“It’ll be fun, Nat,” Jackie said, a half-hearted remark in hopes to start off on the right foot.
“Yeah, and uh, thanks for having me,” Natalie said while fumbling into a lousy curtsey.
They all piled into the backseat, Shauna in the middle as a sort of buffer. It was just about an hour to get to the lake, and Jackie was thankful she wouldn’t be awkwardly squished in the car for very long. Natalie plugged headphones into her Walkman the second they pulled out of the driveway, drowning out whatever conversation Jackie and Shauna were having. After talking about the normal things: plans at the lake, excitement for summer, how they can’t believe they’re going to be seniors etc., Jackie began tearing a page from her notebook. Her and Shauna had a routine down for these road trips of passing notes for any conversations Jackie’s parents shouldn’t hear, while keeping casual conversation aloud so that they wouldn’t be suspicious of the silence.
Jackie took the pen first, scrawling out a quick sentence at the top of the page.
Jeff and I broke up… again
“I’m sure it won’t last,” Shauna said. She said it as if she was offering condolence, but that’s not what Jackie wanted. Not this time.
Jackie took the pen again.
For good. I’ll explain later, it’s too much to write.
Shauna looked concerned and then took the pen from Jackie.
FINALLY!!!
Jackie tried to look offended, but she couldn’t help a smirk from forming. Shauna was right, her and Jeff probably should have been over a long time ago. Jackie didn’t even like him all that much.
Out of nowhere, Natalie grabbed the pen and paper from Shauna. She began scribbling something out before slipping the paper back to Jackie.
Does this mean Jeff Sadecki won’t be gracing us with his presence this summer?
Shauna must have told Natalie about Jeff visiting in the past. Sometimes he would come up for a day to see Jackie when they were dating, and Shauna always seemed to hate it. Jackie figured she had ranted to Natalie about it, preparing her for if it was to happen this summer.
Jackie shook her head. Natalie grabbed the paper back.
What’s Wiskayok High going to do without the perfect couple? Will they cancel homecoming all together?
Jackie rolled her eyes when she read it, and Shauna had a look that Jackie couldn’t place.
“Just kidding, Taylor. I’m sure you’ll still get the crown,” Natalie said.
“Jaqueline stop fussing about that crown. Nobody stands a chance against you and Jeff,” Mrs. Taylor interjected from the passenger seat.
“I know, mom. Natalie’s just teasing me,” Jackie replied.
Shauna took the pen back as they pulled off the main road towards the lake.
She doesn’t know?!
Jackie shook her head and pointed back at her earlier message about explaining later.
Instead of letting Shauna pry further, Jackie stuffed the pen and the paper into her bag. Natalie raised her eyebrows at Shauna, to which Shauna replied with a small shrug. Something about them having unspoken conversations irritated Jackie, especially when it was about her. She didn’t have time to dwell on it though because the lake was beginning to peek through the trees, and it finally felt like summer had begun. Jackie rolled her window down and stuck her head out to take in the familiar northern aroma.
“What are you doing, Jax?” Shauna giggled.
“I’m excited!” Jackie exclaimed, leaning back into the car.
“I wouldn’t have pegged you for someone that enjoys the outdoors. No offense,” Natalie said.
“It’s not exactly the outdoors,” Shauna said. And as if she had planned it, they pulled into the driveway just as Shauna finished speaking.
Natalie’s mouth was agape, and now she was the one hanging out the window.
“I don’t know why I was expecting anything less from your family but… damn,” Natalie said.
Mrs. Taylor frowned at the curse, but Jackie couldn’t care less about Natalie’s manners. She was finally back at her happy place.
“Grab your bags, ladies!” Jackie exclaimed.
The three girls and Mrs. Taylor grabbed their respective suitcases and duffels and headed for the house, leaving Mr. Taylor to bring in the rest. Sometimes Jackie appreciated her family’s traditional ways. Sometimes.
Shauna began heading towards the guest house where her and Jackie always stayed together. It was basically a studio apartment with a loft as a makeshift second bedroom. Jackie and Shauna always shared the loft space together though, despite there being another bed in the main room.
“Jackie,” Mrs. Taylor called from behind. “Why don’t you stay in your bedroom in the main house. Let the guests have the guest house.”
“But I always stay in the guest house,” Jackie protested.
Shauna had stopped and turned back at this point, but she was probably too far to hear the conversation.
“There’s only two beds, Jaqueline,” Mrs. Taylor said, as if it was a given that the girls shouldn’t share a bed.
“Jax?” Shauna called.
“I, uh, I’m staying in the main house this summer. You guys can take the guest house,” Jackie replied before following her mom inside.
Her bedroom at the lake house was beautiful. Jackie’s mother had an interior designer come in and specially decorate the room a few years ago. The pink floral wallpaper felt a little too childish now, along with the framed ballerina artwork. She preferred the cozy and costal vibe that the guest house had much more. Jackie hadn’t slept in her real room at the lake since she was eleven and not yet old enough to stay apart from her parents. Even then though, Shauna was with her. Jackie missed when they were little enough to be tucked into bed together without her parents worrying there was something going on. Although Jackie knew their suspicions didn’t arise out of nowhere.
In her freshman year of high school, Mr. Taylor caught Jackie and her soccer teammates playing spin the bottle in their basement. Nobody was actually kissing when he came in, but it was pretty obvious what was happening when eight girls were circled on the floor around an empty beer bottle. Jackie chased after him, explaining that one of the girls had practically forced them to play. He didn’t want to hear it, and Jackie knew she didn’t sound all that convincing. How could she? Her and Shauna had just shared a peck on the lips, and it was electrifying. Jackie was too confused and excited about the whole thing that she didn’t even care what her dad thought. That was until the next morning, when both her parents sat her down to have a talk about what it meant to be a “proper young woman.” A few weeks later, Jeff asked her out. That at least got her mom off of her back for a while, but Jackie swore she always seemed a bit skeptical anytime Jackie stared too long at a bikini model in one of her magazines, even after she explained it was for motivation.
As Jackie wallowed in her room that felt like a shell of who she really was, Shauna knocked on the door.
“Come in,” Jackie said.
“Hey— wow I forgot you redid this room,” Shauna said.
“My mom redid it. Not me,” Jackie said flatly.
“Ok, well uh, Nat is getting into her bathing suit if you’re up for a swim?” Shauna offered.
Jackie could already see the straps of Shauna’s suit peeking out of her tee shirt.
“Sure, I’ll meet you guys down there,” Jackie said.
Shauna turned to leave but stopped in the doorway on her way out. She turned back to Jackie, giving her an earnest smile.
“I’ll miss having you in the guest house this summer,” she said.
“Me too. Maybe I can come for a sleepover every once in a while… if I’m welcome of course,” Jackie said.
“Yeah, me and Nat will think about it.”
It took Jackie a second to realize she was kidding, but for the tiniest moment, she was hurt to think of Natalie and Shauna making plans together.
“Go get in the water, Shipman,” Jackie giggled.
She dug through her suitcase to find her favorite bikini. It was a pale pink with white trim and polka dots. Shauna had picked it out with her at one of the shops in town last summer. Jackie slipped on the swimsuit, suddenly feeling uncomfortable in its lack of coverage.
She stared at her half naked body in the mirror, hyperaware of every curve and piece of fabric that was hugging her skin just too tight. She leaned to the side until her ribs shone through her pale skin and traced the ridges along her chest. She pulled at the snug material against her hips until it looked somewhat flattering. Feeling disappointed in her own body, Jackie tugged an old polo and some soccer shorts over the swimsuit before heading downstairs.
Her mother was sat in the kitchen preparing dinner, which Jackie was already lacking an appetite for.
“Jaqueline, why don’t you throw on one of those darling little sundresses we bought last week,” she said upon seeing Jackie’s rather tomboy-ish outfit.
“I haven’t found them in my luggage yet,” Jackie lied, knowing she had tossed one aside when finding her bikini.
“You’ll unpack tonight then? Dinner will be ready at six,” her mom said as Jackie walked out the door.
Jackie could hear the other girls laughing down by the water, and she was immediately jealous. She ran down towards the dock where Natalie and Shauna were splayed out soaking up the last bits of late afternoon sun.
“Finally!” Shauna exclaimed.
She was propped up on one elbow in her black bikini that it her so perfectly. Her brown hair was tossed into a loose bun atop of her head, and little wispy curls fell out at the nape of her neck. She looked like a painting. Jackie was used to being in awe of Shauna, but what she didn’t expect was to be entranced by Natalie as well. She was sporting a red one-piece swimsuit that was hugging the curve in her waist perfectly. Jackie had never noticed before, probably because Natalie was always wearing a leather jacket, but she had a very nice chest. Nice in the way that Jackie couldn’t take her eyes off of because she badly wanted her own to look like it.
“Just going to stand there? Or are we finally getting in the water?” Natalie asked.
“I need to warm up a little bit on the dock first,” Jackie said while laying out her towel.
“Well, I’m burning up. Shauna?” Natalie said as she got up from her towel.
“Alright, but Jackie you better not take too long,” Shauna replied.
Natalie jumped into the water, and Shauna followed close behind. They swam out a few feet from the dock, and Jackie listened to them play in the water like giddy little kids. It felt good to hear Shauna say she wanted her to join, but she couldn’t help feeling a little left out with them in there. Although it was her that said she needed to wait. She studied their smiles, their laughter, the way Shauna was having so much fun without her. And then, as if Shauna could read her mind, she swam back to the edge of the dock.
“It’s not too cold, Jax. Come in!” Shauna said as she hung off the dock. Her brown eyes glistened in the late sun, and Jackie couldn’t resist.
“Fine,” she sighed. Just as Jackie was beginning to stand up, Shauna reached for her arm and pulled her in.
She came tumbling into the lake, landing right on top of Shauna. Their limbs were crashing together under the water, Shauna laughing uncontrollably while Jackie screamed at the surprise.
“You bitch,” Jackie said with a grin.
“Had to get you in somehow,” Shauna replied, her hands still lingering on Jackie’s waist.
As if she suddenly realized she was touching a flame, Shauna dropped her hands and swam back to Natalie. Jackie was confused, physical touch had never been an issue before, but she tried not to think about it and swam after her.
“Cute bikini, Jackie,” Natalie said, her eyes lingering a tad too long on Jackie’s chest.
Jackie rolled her eyes; sure it was some sort of backhanded remark.
“Damn, I guess Shauna’s the only one allowed to give you a compliment,” Natalie said.
Shauna shot her a look to shut her up, which only confused Jackie more. Had Shauna complimented her? Not to Jackie’s knowledge.
“So, I found our stash in the guest house,” Shauna said changing the subject.
“Oh my god, I forgot about that,” Jackie said.
“Me and Nat were thinking of doing a little first night celebration. You know, for old times’ sake,” Shauna said.
Jackie did know. Her and Shauna always got drunk on the first night, and many other nights after that. Natalie had no clue about the “old times” her and Shauna shared.
“Yeah, Natalie’s got to be initiated into the lake house,” Jackie said.
“Sounds fun to me,” Natalie said.
“Alright, then it’s settled. We can get started once my parents go to bed,” Jackie said.
--
Dinnertime rolled around soon after they got out of the lake and took showers, and Jackie was tasked with letting the other girls know it was ready. She walked over to the guest house and was greeted by Natalie at the door.
“You cleaned up nice, Taylor,” Natalie said.
She was wearing black cut off jean shorts and a grey tee shirt, and her blonde hair was still wet and messy. Her look was very contrasting to Jackie’s perfectly blown out hair and blue sundress.
“I’ll be ready in a sec!” Shauna called from inside.
Jackie followed Natalie inside and took a seat on the couch. Shauna ran upstairs from the bathroom in just a towel, and Jackie hadn’t realized she had been watching until Natalie snapped her out of it.
“You really love her, huh?” Natalie asked, nodding towards the loft where Shauna was now changing.
“What?” Jackie asked, whipping her head back towards Natalie.
“Like, admire her I mean. It’s cool, you know, to have a best friend like that,” Natalie explained.
“Oh, yeah it’s cool,” Jackie said, relieved at the clarification from Natalie. “Aren’t you and Kevyn close like that?”
“Yeah, but it’s different with a boy. Like, I don’t know it’s just… different,” Natalie said.
It had never dawned on Jackie that Natalie didn’t seem to have a best girl friend at school. There was Lottie, but they only really hung out when it was soccer related. She was often unaware of her luck to have a friend like Shauna. It always just felt like there was no question of them not being friends, that’s just the way life went. Jackie and Shauna. Shauna and Jackie.
“Well, I’m glad you’re joining us for the summer,” Jackie said.
“Really?”
“Yeah, totally. We finally have enough people to do chicken fights,” Jackie joked.
“Don’t you need four people for that?” Natalie asked.
“That’s where Peter comes in,” Shauna interjected, somehow appearing silently behind Jackie during their conversation.
Jackie rolled her eyes. Shauna had been crushing on Peter for years now, and it always annoyed Jackie a bit more than she’d like to admit.
“Who’s Peter?” Natalie asked.
“His family owns the house next door,” Jackie answered. “Shauna’s like, in love with him.”
“I am not!” Shauna protested.
“Yeah whatever, Shipman. Let’s go eat,” Jackie said, leading the way back to the main house.
--
Dinner was uneventful. Mrs. Taylor went on and on about her renovation plans for the lake house. Jackie picked at her food that she was careful to grab smaller portions of than everyone else. Natalie tried to not look bored when Mr. Taylor mentioned the rising property tax on the lake house. Jackie caught Shauna staring at her from across the table a few times, but never long enough to know why.
Jackie helped her mother clean up after dinner and told Shauna to bring a couple games over to the guest house. Her parents wouldn’t go to bed for another hour or so, but they also wouldn’t bother them if Jackie said they were having a game night.
--
When Jackie returned to the guest house eventually, Shauna was rummaging around in the pantry, and Natalie was sticking a tape into the stereo.
“I brought orange juice from the house,” Jackie said as she entered.
“Shauna’s grabbing the liquor I think,” Natalie said.
“Jax, come here,” Shauna called. “I can’t reach.”
Jackie walked over to where Shauna was standing in front of the pantry, confused as to how she’d help seeing they’re the same height.
“The vodka is all the way in the back,” Shauna said.
“I’m not any taller than you are, Shipman,” Jackie said, crossing her arms.
And then suddenly Jackie’s feet were off the floor and Shauna’s hands were gripping her waist. A rush of warmth and something that felt too similar to butterflies came over Jackie.
“Jackie, the vodka,” Shauna said, her voice wavering with struggle.
Jackie reached for the bottle that was hiding behind other random pantry items, and Shauna lowered her back down. Jackie’s cheeks felt hot, which was confusing and embarrassing and made her self conscious. She glanced over to the living room to see Natalie, who had clearly watched the whole thing, leaning on the couch with a devious smirk.
“I’ll be right back,” Shauna said, running up to the loft.
“Start pouring, Taylor,” Natalie called from the living room.
Jackie obliged, pouring vodka and orange juice into the three plastic cups on the counter. She tasted one, wincing at the harsh taste, but knowing it was worth it for a fun night. She carried the three cups along with the bottle of vodka over to where Natalie was sitting. Shauna followed behind holding something behind her back.
“Lake house rules,” she said, holding up a familiar piece of paper.
“Where’d you find that?” Jackie asked, grinning at the memory of her and Shauna making it so many years before.
“I stuck it under the mattress upstairs years ago, and somehow it was still there,” Shauna explained.
“Okay, can you two fill me in?” Natalie asked, taking a sip from her drink.
“When Shauna and I were like ten, we made a list of rules for the lake house,” Jackie said.
“We swore on it, so I thought it’s only fair if you did too,” Shauna said to Natalie.
“You’re seriously going to make me swear on some stupid list of rules you made seven years ago?” Natalie asked.
“You already broke the first rule. Never disrespect the rules,” Shauna said.
“C’mon, Nat!” Jackie pled.
Natalie looked at her with a serious look, but it quickly turned into a grin.
“Fine,” Natalie groaned, throwing her hands in the air.
Shauna began reading the rules one by one, and Jackie kept an eye on Natalie’s hand making sure it stayed over her heart.
Jackie + Shauna’s Official Summer Rules
- These rules are serious, so don’t disrespect them! Ever!
- If it’s sunny, no getting out of the water even when our fingers get pruney
- Shauna gets to play all of her favorite songs (the ones Jackie hates) as long as she dances with Jackie
- No parents allowed in our secret plans
- Every argument ends with a pinky promise. No bad feelings for each other.
- Ice cream counts as dinner
- No boys!! Ick!!
- Nobody sees these rules except Jackie and Shauna
- NO SECRETS!!!
- Pretend that summer lasts forever, and beg to stay longer even though it never works
“No boys?” Natalie asked, raising an eyebrow at Jackie.
“We were ten, Nat,” Jackie said.
Shauna didn’t say anything. She just sipped her drink and kept her eyes down.
“I shouldn’t have broken the rule though. Sorry, Shauna,” Jackie recovered.
“You’re forgiven, but only if you finally tell us what happened with Jeff,” Shauna said.
“Can I take my hand off my heart now?” Natalie interrupted.
“Oh, right. You still have to swear on it,” Jackie said.
“I think we cheersed with an Oreo when we did it, but how about a shot instead? Jackie and I can take one too so it’s official,” Shauna said.
“Alright, swear me in so we can start drinking for real,” Natalie said.
“Repeat after me,” Jackie started. “I, Natalie Scattorcio, swear to never break any of the ten rules listed on this paper or Jackie Taylor and Shauna Shipman have full authority to send me home.”
“Jesus, Jax,” Shauna giggled.
“This is serious stuff, Shipman,” Jackie teased.
For a moment it felt like they were back in elementary school, feeling like they were the only two people alive. Like they were the only two people who mattered, but not because they believed they were superior, but because they didn’t need anyone else when they had each other. That’s how it always felt when they shared these small moments of laughter between just the two of them.
“I, Natalie Scattorcio, swear to never break any of the ten childish rules listed on this ancient piece of paper or Princess Jackie Taylor and her precious puppy Shauna Shipman have full authority to send me home,” Natalie said.
“I’m just going to pretend you didn’t change any of the words, so… cheers!” Shauna exclaimed, raising the bottle and taking a swig from it. She passed it to Natalie who eagerly took a much longer swig and then passed it to Jackie.
“God, that’s disgusting!” Jackie exclaimed, wiping her mouth and setting the bottle back down.
“Time for rule number nine, Jax. What happened with you and Jeff?” Shauna asked.
“He was being an ass… again,” Jackie said as she refilled her drink. “He told me if I wouldn’t go all the way with him that I didn’t actually love him. When I tried to tell him why I didn’t want to, he told me I didn’t know what I was missing and that he’d give it to someone else.”
“What a pig,” Natalie muttered.
“Not that I’m on Jeff’s side, because I’m not, but why don’t you want to have sex with him? I mean you guys had been together for so long,” Shauna said.
“Because Shauna, sex should be meaningful. I’m waiting for the perfect moment, and Jeff couldn’t respect that,” Jackie explained.
Natalie snickered, earning two disappointed stares from Jackie and Shauna.
“Sorry, I just think that’s a little silly,” Natalie said.
“Silly that I’m not willing to give it up easy? Or that I actually care about how I lose my virginity?” Jackie asked judgmentally.
“I’m just saying that you can’t control every little thing in life,” Natalie said.
Shauna was watching both of them, flipping her head back and forth as they debated the importance of sex.
“Fine. Tell us how you lost your virginity then, Nat,” Jackie said.
“It was after homecoming freshman year with Bobby Farleigh. We fucked in the back of the school parking lot in his van, and there was nothing magical about it,” Natalie said, taking a long swig from the bottle.
“Woah, Bobby Farleigh? I always thought it was Kevyn,” Jackie said.
“Ew, no. That’d be like fucking my brother,” Natalie said.
“Shocker, Mari lied about that one too then,” Jackie said.
“First of all, I thought we all know to not believe anything Mari says. Second of all, she said I fucked Kevyn Tan?” Natalie asked.
“Well, yeah. I only believed her because we all knew you skipped practice to hang out with him and Elizabeth Perkins, and the next day you were covering up hickeys in the locker room,” Jackie explained.
Shauna stayed silent, but she had a knowing look on her face. She kept throwing glances at Natalie, seemingly trying to read what she was thinking. It became very obvious that Jackie was out of the loop, especially when Natalie didn’t say anything.
“What? Did I catch you in a lie or something?” Jackie asked.
“No, it’s uh, it’s not that,” Natalie stuttered.
Jackie had never seen Natalie not have a biting comment back at someone, especially her. Part of the reason they never got along was because they were both too strong-willed.
“Let’s talk about something else,” Shauna said, clearly directing the comment at Jackie.
Now Jackie knew there was something she didn’t know, and she wouldn’t stand for a secret to be kept from her in her own house. Using the same stern voice she used when Coach made her get the team in line, she spoke directly to Natalie.
“Remember when you swore against keeping secrets this summer? Spill, or you’re going home,” Jackie said. She didn’t really mean the last part, but she didn’t know how else to sound serious.
“Jackie,” Shauna reasoned, putting her hand on Jackie’s shoulder. Jackie shook it off and stared at Natalie.
“You’re so annoying. I fucked Elizabeth, not Kevyn,” Natalie said.
Natalie wasn’t breaking eye contact with Jackie, as if she was trying to guilt her for badgering her. Jackie pursed her lips, unsure what to say. Shauna just stared at the ground in front of her and picked at the carpet.
“So, you’re like… gay?” Jackie asked.
“If I say yes, are you going to exile me back to Wiskayok?” Natalie asked.
This time Shauna looked up. She was staring at Jackie waiting for her response.
“No, I just didn’t know. Sorry I made you tell us,” Jackie mumbled.
“It’s fine, and Shauna already knew,” Natalie said.
Shauna smiled back at her, and Jackie wondered when Shauna and Natalie had gotten so close. She wondered if Shauna had any big secrets that Natalie knew, and then she realized she could ask. The buzz of alcohol and feeling of privacy at the lake house led her to her next question.
“So, Shipman, what about you? Still an innocent virgin?” Jackie asked.
“Yes, Jackie. I would have told you,” Shauna replied, her cheeks red.
“Just making sure,” Jackie replied.
--
The rest of the night was rather uneventful. They drank way too much vodka while telling stories and sharing secrets that kept them giggling. Everything with Natalie’s confession blew over, and they didn’t bring it up again. Jackie let Shauna braid her hair and afterwards fell back into her lap where she stayed for the rest of the night. When it was time for bed, Shauna and Natalie walked Jackie back to her lonesome in the main house.
Jackie brushed her teeth and crawled into bed, a faint somber feeling growing inside of her. She wondered if Natalie and Shauna were still awake in the guest house, giggling as the sleepiness made them slightly delirious. Her mind wandered back to the conversation about Shauna’s virginity. She thought about how Shauna reacted, nervously blushing and clearly wanting out of the conversation. She wondered if she had been too pushy, too direct. Maybe Shauna wouldn’t tell her about these things anymore, maybe she’d tell Natalie who was obviously much more laid back on the topic. Jackie couldn’t place why she cared so much. All she knew was that a familiar sadness was looming over her. Her mind raced until she finally dozed off in her own bed, feeling more distant than ever from her best friend.