Chapter Text
She closed the door to his bedroom quietly behind her, tiptoed towards the hallway where she found her shoes and his - messily kicked off their feet as they’d come in the night before. Her coat, she noticed, was on the sofa. She grabbed it swiftly, stepped into her heels, wincing slightly at the ache of the soles of her feet. It wasn’t nearly as satisfying as the one between her thighs.
God, she needed a shower, needed to wash him off or she’d be of no use to anyone. Why had she let Mary persuade her to go out for drinks the night before starting a new job? Sure, it was cause for celebration – finally, after all these years, she’d be rid of the man who had once tricked her into believing he was her best friend – but she should have known she’d drink more than just the one cocktail.
That is to say, she only drank two, because the man she’d just left asleep in the bed she had just vacated, had bought her the second one, had sent it over to her table in a true dickish move that she should not have considered attractive at all. But she had – or, maybe it had been his smile, the glint in his eye, the mess of his curls, the shape of his glasses, the forearms his rolled up sleeves had exposed…
She opened his front door and stepped out. She hesitated for a moment, rummaged through her bag even, but there was no paper or pen in it. And, sure, she had lipstick, but she was not going to write on his front door, was she? How was he supposed to get that off easily? It would annoy him, for sure, and – also – she wasn’t going to risk his not calling her back by leaving her number exposed for the world to see. He had seemed into it, into her… not just a little either.
But what if it wasn’t about her? What if he was just really into sex? What if anyone would have done it for him? She was not prepared to suffer that kind of mortification on the day she was about to start afresh. This was supposed to be a new start, a new chapter – last night was the final huzza of her last – and quite frankly horrible – one. At least, it ended on a high. Several ones, but that was something she should not dwell on too much now, or she’d regret leaving in the first place.
She caught the tube home, awkward in her short dress, which made it glaringly obvious that she’d gone out the night before and was traversing the proverbial walk of shame. Not that she was feeling ashamed, mind. There were too few people around at six in the morning to judge her in any case, and whenever she thought about his hands on her skin, his lips near her ear, she had to suppress the shiver that threatened to escape.
Once home, she stepped out of her dreaded heels again, let her dress slip to her feet and stepped into a hot shower, letting the water wash away the evidence of him – in so far as this was possible, because that was definitely a hickey just below her right breast, and just below her navel, too.
Half an hour later, she was dressed and feeling refreshed, finished a bowl of yoghurt, swapped her heels of the night before for a pair of respectable Moccasins, grabbed her work bag and then set off for Sleekeazy’s, her new place of employment.
She was feeling empowered, in all honesty, as she walked into the building, and up to the front desk, announcing her presence. Today, she decided in Dear Evan Hansen-style, was going to be a good day, and she smiled to herself, looking about the space as she waited for Mr Potter – her new employer, who wanted to receive her personally, already a huge leap forward from her previous job at Riddle’s – to arrive. She checked the time on her phone – it was a very respectable 8.47, meaning that she was a good 13 minutes early. This, she hoped, her new boss would take as eagerness to start.
The doors of the lift opened, and she looked up from her phone just in time as out stepped - oh god. Oh god, oh god, oh god!
He had stopped in his tracks, too. His eyes wide behind his glasses, his hair messy and unkempt, slightly wet from the shower he had clearly taken himself after she had left that morning, and – she flushed violently, heat creeping across her skin. She had trouble breathing.
He, had been stricken for a moment, but then something flickered across his face – his jaw tightened, his shoulders squared, and he stepped forward. He was clearly the professional here.
“Miss Evans,” his voice did not betray a thing, “welcome to Sleekeazy’s. We are delighted to have you with us.”
She blinked, momentarily frozen, then forced herself to move. Her hand extended automatically, fingers slightly trembling as they met his in a handshake that was far too formal for someone who had, just hours ago, traced those same fingers across his bare chest.
“Mr Potter,” she managed, her voice thinner than she’d hoped.
Just as she tried to extract her hand from his firm grip – of course, his handshake was a powerful, confident one – her phone slipped from her other hand, and clattered to the floor with a sharp, echoing thud.
“Oh god,” she muttered, crouching quickly to retrieve it, cheeks burning. She should not have worn this pencil skirt today. It had been a very, very, very bad idea.
She could feel his gaze on her as she stood again, smoothing her skirt and forcing a tight, apologetic smile. Her voice came out far too high-pitched: “First day jitters!”
She thought she saw the corners of his mouth twitch ever so slightly, but might have imagined it, too.
“Understandable,” he said, voice smooth, professional. “First days can be… unpredictable.” There was something in his eyes as he said the last word that made her stomach flutter. Then he turned slightly, gesturing toward the elevator. “Shall we?”
She followed him, trying to match her strides to his. She knew he was tall – they had laughed about their height difference once she’d discarded of her heels before he had picked her up, and she had wrapped her legs around his waist – but she couldn’t remember having to almost run to keep up with him the night before. Maybe, because he'd been wanting to stick to her as much as possible then, while that was clearly the very opposite of what he wanted in broad daylight.
She winced involuntarily when he pressed the button for the lift, calling it down. He had been so warm, so open, so inviting the night before… could it be that he had been disappointed to find her gone without a goodbye?
The doors to the elevator opened, and they stepped inside. He pressed the button for the fifth floor, and as the doors closed, she found herself unable to keep quiet.
“I’m sorry,” she blurted, the words tumbling out. “I had no idea… clearly, I wouldn’t have… you know, if I’d known who you were, and this morning I shouldn’t have –”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said quickly, cutting her off. His gaze flicked to the side, avoiding hers. “I get it. It’s fine.”
But it wasn’t fine. She could hear it in the way he said it – too fast, too flat. His jaw was tight again, and though his posture remained composed, the corners of his mouth didn’t twitch this time. If anything, they seemed to press into a firmer line.
She didn’t dare say anything, however, and didn’t get the chance either for the doors opened with a ping, and she found herself on the floor where she’d had her job interview a couple of weeks prior with one of the Sleekeazy recruiters, Marlene McKinnon.
“So, welcome to the team. You’ll be working closely with our other lab technicians, of course. The labs are to the right, my office is all the way on the other end of the hallway, although you probably won’t find yourself there often –” James cleared his throat, his voice still measured, but quieter now. “If you need anything, Miss Evans,” he said, the formal address landing with just a touch too much emphasis, “don’t hesitate to ask. I have no doubt that the others will help you get settled.”
He gave a brief nod, the kind that felt like punctuation rather than warmth, and turned to walk away – not hurried, but deliberate. She thought she saw his shoulders tense just slightly as he did.
“Fuck,” she said, barely audible but the sentiment behind the word there all the same.
“Oh my god!” Mary cackled over the phone as she called her best friend from the supply closet opposite the Sleekeazy labs. “You shagged your boss?!”
Lily winced, clutching her phone tighter and glancing toward the hallway to make sure no one was within earshot. “Keep your voice down,” she hissed. “I didn’t know he was my boss, you know that! You were there last night.”
Mary was laughing so hard she was wheezing. “This is so much better than that time you accidentally flirted with your dentist.”
Lily groaned, leaning against the shelf of neatly labelled ingredients. “This is a disaster. He was so cold this morning. Like, ice. I think he’s mad I left without saying anything.”
“Well, yeah,” Mary said, still breathless. “You ghosted him. After a night of what I assume was very enthusiastic teamwork and collaboration.”
Lily closed her eyes. “I’m going to die,” she said, fingers of her one hand pressing into her forehead in an attempt to rid herself of the headache that had started to bloom there in the last hour. “I’m going to die of shame in this very supply closet, and they’ll find me next to a vat of...” she looked to her left, read the label of one of them any different chemicals stored there, “... Citric Acid.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re going to go back out there, head held high. The sex was good, yeah?”
“I cannot possibly go into that over the phone at work,” she almost whispered, pushing away from the shelf, “but rest assured that I had a really good night. My morning, on the other hand…”
“You should go over to his office later today, wearing nothing but your lab coat. I bet he’ll forget exactly how angry he’s supposed to be with you.”
Lily nearly dropped her phone again. “Mary!” she hissed, scandalized. “I am not going to seduce my boss in a lab coat. This is a professional environment!”
“What? He’s seen you naked already, and you him. What’s there to lose?”
“My integrity? His?”
Mary snorted. “Please. His integrity left the building the moment he started undressing you with his eyes at the bar last night.”
Lily let out a strangled noise. “I am hanging up now.”
“Only because you don’t like that I’m making sense –”
She’d pressed the end call button, slipped her phone back in the pocket of her lab coat and then stepped out, hands reaching for her ponytail to tighten it, and slamming right into someone’s shoulder.
“Fuck,” she said, practically wheezing as she reached for her collarbone. She felt as if all air had been knocked out of her.
“Fuck,” a voice echoed, and a pair of hands grasped her upper arms. “Are you all right?”
She looked up, still clutching her collarbone, and found herself staring into a pair of concerned hazel eyes behind thick-rimmed glasses.
Of course.
It was him. James.
She remembered asking him for it – his first name, that is. Remembered how he’d said it against her lips, how she’d repeated it after him, how the corners of his lips had lifted against his mouth, how he’d said: “It sounds much better when you say it.”
The universe had clearly decided that today was going to be a full-blown soap opera.
“I’m fine,” she said quickly, though her voice came out more like a squeak than anything even remotely reassuring.
He frowned.
“You don’t sound it –”
“Please,” she interrupted, “I’m so embarrassed already. I can’t deal with any more of it.”
Instead of stepping away from her, he closed the distance between them, his hands now firmly pressed against her forearms, sliding up and down in a soothing rhythm.
“Breathe, Lily.” He said it softly, so she was the only one who could possibly hear it – not that they were at a risk of being overheard, seeing as everyone was in either their lab or their office. “Just breathe.”
His thumbs brushed slow, calming circles over the fabric of her sleeves, and as she did as he’d told her, she found herself remembering how perfect he’d been the night before, how he’d whispered in her ear that she was fucking gorgeous, that he loved the taste of her… she ducked out of his grip, cheeks a bright red as she said in a panic: “I resign.”
James Potter – her boss – blinked, clearly caught off guard. “Pardon?”
“I resign,” she repeated, though this time it came out more like a whisper. Her eyes were wide, her cheeks still burning.
He stared at her for a moment, then ran a hand through his hair, visibly trying to process. “You’ve been here for three hours.”
She wrapped her arms around her waist. “My resignation has nothing to do with me being here. It’s got everything to do with –”
“Stop right there,” he said, reaching for her hand, and pulling her with him. “We’ll talk about this in my office –”
“I have made up my mind –”
“Well, I’m not accepting your resignation. If you want to quit, you can send a letter to HR, and be done with it. You won’t go through me.”
They’d reached the end of the hallway, and stepped into the room that was clearly his office. He closed the door behind her, and – to her horror – the shutters, too.
“I don’t know what you think we’ll be doing in here, but I’m not about to spread my legs for you just because you got me to come three times last night.”
He turned, incredulous. “Who do you think I am? I’m just wanting to have a private conversation –”
“We don’t need the shutters closed to have one. Just the door will do.”
He shook his head, but did as she requested, striding over to his desk and perching on the edge of it, arms crossed now.
“You’re not resigning. It took us over half a year to find someone suitable for the job.”
She mirrored his posture defensively. “So, just because you had trouble filling a position –” she stopped, her cheeks heating as her words registered, and she felt flustered once more. “What I mean to say is that just because you spent six months looking for someone, I’m stuck?”
“Of course not,” he replied. “I’m just not wanting to let you leave because you impressed Marlene. Because you’re perfect for the job, because you have all the qualifications –”
“We had sex!” she burst out, her voice cracking under the weight of everything she’d been holding in. “Really good sex. And now I’m supposed to pretend it didn’t happen? Like it doesn’t matter?”
He'd dropped his arms, held on to his desk, knuckles whitened. “You didn’t seem to have any trouble pretending like it was anything special this morning.” His voice sounded low and controlled, but he didn’t fool her – he was hurt.
She blinked, swallowed, looked at her feet. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I panicked, I think. This was supposed to be a new chapter, and I wanted to do well on my first day at a new job… I thought about leaving a note, but I didn’t have any pen or paper, so I…”
“Left,” he finished.
She nodded, eyes still on the floor. “Yeah.”
He didn’t respond for a moment, but then he exhaled, rubbed a hand over his face. “All right, we’ve got a problem here, but it’s not insurmountable. You can keep working here – I swear I’ll keep my distance, that you won’t even see me.”
She laughed bitterly. “That’s not a solution.”
“Then what is the solution, Lily?” He asked, sounding almost angry now. “You want to leave? Throw away a job you worked hard to get? That was – as you said – supposed to be a new chapter for you? All because of one night?”
She opened her mouth, then closed it again.
He stood up from his desk, his voice quieter now. “I’m trying to make this easier for you. For both of us. I don’t want you to give up on anything that you actually want. Not if it’s me that’s standing in the way.”