Work Text:
There is no joy in finding new people to love. There is no joy in finding one more thing to lose. For his lovely and his beautiful as so many people can be, Shadow knows that they will not last. They'll never do.
It is wondrous in the moment, yes, but lives burn out so quickly to those that have been around for so long. Shadow was there at the beginning – she was there before light, before stars, before the beauty of the universe unfolded and life itself was created. She was one of the two that brought life to planets out of nothing. She was one of the two that created swirling galaxies for the sake of art and beauty. She came before all immortal, and every mortal thereafter. Preceeding all but maybe Time itself.
And so, though she loved many and though she cared more, every beauty in her life was tainted by this horrible truth.
Shadow would be there at the end, as she was in the beginning. She would bear witness to the death of all. As she looks at this family she has gathered, her wonderful collection of brightly burning souls, she can feel only terror. More than love, she feels the dread of losing them. This family that Shadow has found- it would not last. They never do.
For now, she will sit with them. She will pretend not to see the darkness in their eyes, the fog of their certain fate. She will pretend that she does not sense that the immortals in their little group are already getting close to the end of their long lifespans, that she cannot feel them all slipping from her grasp. Even as she sees visions of her beloveds dying horrifically. Even as she feels their time stretching short.
She will sit with them, and she will enjoy this as it lasts. Even though it fills her with meaningless terror, she will stay.
However long she can.