Chapter Text
Gao Tu woke up to the sunlight hitting his face, bothering his eyes. When he turned over to hide from it, it was Hua Yong’s unreadable gaze that greeted him good morning. He was already dressed, sitting on the edge of the bed.
Gao Tu was still naked.
And dirty. All over.
The feeling of shame washed over him again, making him try to hide under the blanket.
Hua Yong seemed to notice, because the expression on his face was more than pleased. “How are you today?”
“... Fine.”
It bothered Gao Tu that he wasn’t lying at all.
In fact, he was more than fine. His body was relaxed and comfortable, when before he could never shake off the weight of discomfort he carried every day. He no longer felt sick.
That only made Gao Tu’s frustration grow.
Had he really suffered for so many years just for an Enigma’s dick to magically heal him overnight? Who the hell decided it had to be that way?
“You can take a bath and clean up, I think enough hours have passed already.” Hua Yong told him. “I’ll call the doctor so that–”
The phone in his hand vibrated.
Sheng Shaoyou.
“Uh, Mr. Sheng? Good morning.”
“A-Yong.” came the voice on the other end. “Where have you been? I haven’t heard from you all night.”
And that simple exchange felt like a bucket of ice water crashing down on Gao Tu. Suddenly, he felt disgusted by things that had nothing to do with his hygiene. He felt disgusted with himself, with who he was.
He had been so wrapped up in his own issues that he hadn’t stopped to think about the other people involved. Yes, Hua Yong was the one who suggested it, but he should have kept his feet on the ground, he should have thought more about the consequences of what they were doing. But at that point, it was already too late.
It had already turned into an affair. Something others would call a fling, because it wasn’t planned or recurring enough to be called a full-on “manstress”. In fact, from that moment on, he planned never to show his face in front of Hua Yong ever again.
Which was complicated, given that technically, they worked together.
Should I quit?
But he needed the money…
“I stayed at the office. We ran into complications that had to be resolved as quickly as possible, so everyone agreed to spend the night at the company. Sorry for not letting you know, my phone died and I couldn’t charge it.”
The lie rolled off his tongue so naturally that even he almost believed it. His heart sank in his chest, heavy. He had disrespected Sheng Shaoyou, they both had, how could Hua Yong be so calm? Not even the slightest bit of remorse?
Gao Tu felt like he was suffocating because his lungs weren’t working properly, as if his windpipe had sealed shut.
On the verge of a panic attack, he jumped out of bed and, legs trembling, stumbled toward the bathroom. Hua Yong didn’t take his eyes off him for a second while he continued his call.
Gao Tu wasn’t proud of his selfish behavior. The few times he thought about Sheng Shaoyou, it was only to imagine lewd scenarios of him with his boyfriend’s cock shoved down his throat. To say he was disappointed in himself was an understatement. He couldn’t even look himself in the eye in the mirror, even after showering.
He thanked the universe that the clothes Hua Yong had lent him to return from the hospital were still there, so he didn’t have to walk back into the bedroom naked to get them. He had already been through enough shame, and one more would finish him off.
When he came out, Hua Yong was nowhere to be seen. Gao Tu allowed himself to finally release the air trapped in his lungs.
A part of him scolded himself soon after, for acting like a victim, as if he hadn’t very consciously agreed to sleep with a man who was already taken.
But Gao Tu had spent so long desperate to heal himself, desperate to end all his problems, to stop being a burden to Shen Wenlang… Was it really so bad to have taken the chance when it presented itself?
Yes, Gao Tu.
He reprimanded himself as he walked toward the door to leave.
Nothing justifies the harm you did to Sheng Shaoyou and his relationship.
“Leaving without saying goodbye is rude.” Hua Yong’s voice stopped him just as his hand reached the doorknob. “I didn’t know Mr. Gao was so discourteous.”
Gao Tu turned around. Hua Yong was watching him with bored eyes, leaning against the wall not too far away. “I…”
“Come have breakfast so I can take you to the doctor afterward.”
“N-no need. Maybe another day– I’ll go to the hospital myself. I have to get back now– lots of things to do.” he lied quickly, knowing it was painfully obvious. “There’s no need for you to drive me.”
“Do you even know how to get back home from here?” Hua Yong asked.
“... No.”
Hua Yong gave him another of those smug smiles, the kind Gao Tu was beginning to hate.
“Then come back and eat something. I’ll take you home once the doctor tells me about your condition.” he said while heading toward the kitchen.
Gao Tu had no choice but to follow him.
The food had never tasted as bitter to him as it did that morning.
*
“Incredible.” the doctor muttered in amazement, looking over some papers and the monitor next to the bed where Gao Tu was lying. “If I hadn’t treated you all these years, I would hardly believe you’d been so ill before.”
Gao Tu furrowed his brow, still offended that the problem that had left him writhing in pain for so long had been solved so easily.
“But tell me again, who was the Enigma so generous as to do you this favor?”
“A friend of a friend of mine, who was briefly in the country for business.” Hua Yong answered smoothly from beside him. Lies were like his second language. “When I mentioned how much this problem was worrying me, my friend offered to help us get in contact with him.”
“You’ve had such luck, Gao Tu.” the doctor said, giving his shoulder a few pats, accompanied by a soft laugh.
“Haha… yeah.”
“I’d love to see an Enigma in person someday. They must be impressive beings.” Gao Tu wanted to roll his eyes at the sight of Hua Yong puffing out his chest, tucking his hands behind his back.
“Oh, they definitely are.”
The doctor went on rambling about Enigmas for a while longer, advising that, just to be safe, Gao Tu should curl up for a few more days with his savior (if he was still in the country) so the pheromone exchange would continue helping balance his metabolism.
Gao Tu gave a firm “NO.” in his head. He would never share a bed with Hua Yong again.
As they were saying goodbye, the doctor grabbed his arm. “Gao Tu, you know this is like being given a second chance, don’t you? You should take advantage of it and take better care of yourself this time.”
Gao Tu looked into the eyes of the man who had been more of a father to him than his own ever was, and nodded. For him, for his sister… Gao Tu would take better care of himself.
“And no suppressants.” the doctor added at the very end. “At least until you’ve gone through your first or second heat after this.”
*
“So… we could say I’ve got a magic dick, don’t you think?” Hua Yong quipped with a cocky smirk as he drove toward the apartment complex where Gao Tu lived.
This time, Gao Tu couldn’t help rolling his eyes. “Idiot…”
“Hmm? Did you say something?”
“N-nothing.” he hurried to reply, a little unsettled by how quick his tongue had been.
For some strange reason, knowing Hua Yong was an Enigma shattered the barrier that had always made him feel so far beneath him.
When he first met Hua Yong, introduced to him as an Omega, he had worried. He feared Shen Wenlang would make his life miserable until he decided to leave. But when it became clear that wouldn’t happen, jealousy and self-loathing began growing inside him like a creeping vine.
The Omega Hua Yong was so perfect and unattainable that Gao Tu felt ashamed just imagining himself in his place. He was everything Gao Tu had longed to be. He had the confidence, the style, the looks, the means. Shen Wenlang seemed to tolerate him, claimed to even like him… Gao Tu couldn’t hold a candle to him.
Even though he was technically Hua Yong’s superior, Gao Tu always felt very-little when speaking to him. Hua Yong made him feel out of place, as if he didn’t even deserve to address him.
When he discovered that Hua Yong was actually an Enigma, that feeling of inferiority stopped. Was it because he no longer saw him as a threat to himself?
“Are you going to invite me in when we get there?”
“What?” Gao Tu looked at him as if he’d grown another head. “Why?”
“Didn’t you hear your doctor? You need to cuddle to keep up the treatment.”
Oh, so that was it.
“There’s no need. He also said it was more for prevention than because I really needed it.” he rushed to excuse himself, because the idea of having Hua Yong holding him had actually appealed to him, and that horrified him.
Never again meant never again.
Suddenly, Hua Yong’s phone rang again.
“A-Yong.” it was Sheng Shaoyou’s voice on the other end. Since Hua Yong was driving, he put the call on speaker and didn’t take the phone out of its holder. “When will you come back? It’s been so long since I last saw you.”
The suffocation returned, and Gao Tu found the idea of throwing himself out of the car very tempting in that moment.
He just wanted to disappear.
“Seems like Mr. Sheng can’t live without me.” the absolute tenderness on Hua Yong’s face was something new, something Gao Tu had never seen before. At least, not in Hua Yong.
And yet, his eyes had a certain sinister gleam that left him feeling uneasy.
Gao Tu still couldn’t understand how someone so pretty, so harmless-looking, could be so terrifying.
The call ended a few minutes later, with Hua Yong promising he would be back soon, and Sheng Shaoyou admitting that he missed him and couldn’t wait to hold him in his arms.
They seemed to have such a genuine love that Gao Tu wanted to vomit. Especially because Hua Yong showed no signs of regret or guilt. He was just normal, as always. Did what they did really not weigh on his conscience at all? Or did it mean so little to him that it wasn’t even worth it?
Helping out a coworker. That’s all.
Gao Tu didn’t know how to feel about it.
“Does it really… not affect you at all?” when the car stopped, Gao Tu gathered the courage to confront him.
“What exactly should affect me?”
“What we did… Sheng Shaoyou.” his tongue felt so heavy in his mouth, it was hard to speak.
Contrary to all expectations, Hua Yong let out such a natural laugh that Gao Tu stopped noticing how his hands were wrinkling the coat he wore.
“So that’s why you’ve been acting so strange.” he pointed out as he pushed his hair back. “You’re such a proper little thing, of course doing what we did would be eating you alive!”
“And you– doesn’t it affect you?”
“Well, he hasn’t asked me to be his official partner. And besides, he’s also been with someone else even while we were already together.” his hands gripped the steering wheel in anger. “That makes us even now, don’t you think?”
Hua Yong smiled. A crooked, forced smile.
“But you shouldn’t worry about these things. They’re my business, and I’ll take care of them.” he grabbed Gao Tu’s face with one hand, squeezing until his lips formed a pout. “Let’s give your head a rest, it needs it.”
His thumb traced a line along Gao Tu’s lower lip, and his face leaned closer and closer. When he was far too close, Gao Tu quickly turned his head away.
Hua Yong clicked his tongue. “Fine, then.”
The hand that had been holding him dropped to his thigh, squeezing hard before pulling away completely to grab a bag sitting by his seat.
“The perfume I told you about.” he explained as he handed it over. “Since I’ve only used it once, I don’t know if repeated use causes any side effects. If you notice anything unusual, let me know.”
Gao Tu nodded. “Yes.”
“And this is my number. Call me when you’re about to run out.”
When Hua Yong finally left, Gao Tu ran straight to the pharmacy to buy several pregnancy tests.
Even though Hua Yong had told him there was no risk of getting pregnant, he had plenty of reasons not to trust his word entirely. So, for the next seven days, he took a test every morning.
All came back negative. And Gao Tu was finally able to relax.