Chapter Text
It had been a difficult day. So much had happened. Thesoccer ban. The crushing defeat at the hands of Protocol Omega 2.0. The capture of Coach Endou. And of course...
I will take away your love for soccer.
Shindou could not forget those dead eyes, those scornful gazes that all of their teammates gave them. It was back to their worst days, no, the situation was even more dire. Even when they played under Fifth Sector and sold their souls to the score order, their passion, their love still dwelled deep within.
Now, it was all gone. Not a single spark left.
"It has been turned to hate", Dr Arno said. "If we do not reverse it soon, it will become permanent."
It will become permanent.
He shivered. Granted, he was no longer Captain; yet, he had grown so used to the position, watching over the Team as his own responsability had become second nature to him. He had failed to protect them, and it weighted heavy on his heart.
The face of a particular pink-haired defender came back to his mind.
He could not be selfish. It was not about his own attachment to Kirino, it was about the whole Team. Ranmaru was not more important than the others. Ranmaru...
The playmaker could not fool himself anymore. Fei said they would leave the next day, so Takuto still had time, right?
He did not think and rushed to his best friend's house.
The one who opened the door was Chika, Ranmaru's big sister. Upon seeing her brother's friend, her eyes widened, and she seemed a bit uneasy.
"Chika-san, I came to see Ranmaru."
The young woman fidgeted.
"Shindou-kun, what happened? Ran told me not to let you in if you came by."
The midfielder was frozen in place. Sure, Ranmaru had lost his love for soccer, but their friendship? It was beyond the field. He felt stabbed right into the heart, being denied his place alongside his best friend, one he thought would always belong to him.
"Ranmaru lost his passion for soccer," admitted the teenager. "I was worried for him. That's why I came."
A half-lie. Of course he was worried about his friend, but he also sought his warmth. Ranmaru always was the one to calm him down when he had doubts, to hold him into his arms, to listen to him exteriorize his feelings on the piano.
He needed him.
Right now, Shindou was selfish, and he knew it.
Chika lost herself in her thoughts for a few moments.
"I'll let you in, only because I know you are a good person, Shindou-kun. And I know how much Ran and you meant to each other, and I wish you can fix whatever transpired between you two. However" - and her voice was firmer - "please never talk about soccer again. After last month's match, it was made clear that this sport would never do anything but bring harm to everybody. I have to protect my sibling."
This last part sent a shiver down Shindou's spine, but he swallowed. The history change was deeply enrooted, affecting the whole country. To hear soccer be denied like that, it felt infuriating. But it did not matter right now, for he just wanted to see the defender one last time before departure.
Dr Arno made it clear that the mind control could not be easily erased, so he would not try to talk Ranmaru out of it. He just wanted to see him, talk about anything even if not their biggest common hobby, just... be there. With him.
Chika let Shindou into the main room, and went upstairs to drag Ranmaru down. They both came back a minute later. However, as soon as Kirino spotted Shindou, he yelled.
"Why did you let him in? I told you not to!"
He was beginning to hurry his way back onto his room, when Shindou screamed his name. The defender stopped.
"Please, Ranmaru. I just want to speak with you."
The pink-haired turned around to face his friend anew. He could see the wet eyes, and took pity on the boy.
"Fine. Come," he sighed, and they both made their way upstairs.
Shindou knew Kirino's room as if it was his own. Thus, his blood froze when he noticed how different it was. The soccer posters on the walls had disappeared, visibly torn to shreds according to the markings they left behind. Different soccer magazines were gathered messily in the trash can. The Raimon number 3 jersey was in shambles, agressively ripped.
Shindou swallowed.
He just wanted to see Ranmaru, but... was he still his Ranmaru? Would his Ranmaru ever do that?
The tactician was scared, but he spoke first.
"I just... I wanted to see you. After everything that happened, and..."
"For me, or for yourself?"
The question took Shindou aback. It was so cold, so angry, yet... so painfully true. For the musician knew very well himself that he needed Ranmaru more than Ranmaru ever needed him.
"I was worried. We had a rough day, and..." he paused, finding it difficult to continue, "when you left the caravan, we barely had the chance to talk, and..."
"Are you trying to convince me to get back to this stupid sport?"
Shindou felt something hit his head at the end of the sentence.
Ranmaru had raised his voice, and thrown him his pencil case to the face.
Ranmaru had thrown something at his face.
"R-Ran...", he mumbled, and he could feel himself beginning to cry, "I don't fucking care about soccer. I care about you. About us. About our friendship. I don't care if you don't want to play... please, I don't want to lose you."
It came out all at once, desperate.
"You don't want to lose your faithful second-in-command," Kirino began, his voice stern and freezing. "You don't want to lose your shadow that makes you look good on the field. You don't want to lose somebody you can drag along with your antics to play your barbaric sport. That's what you don't want to lose."
Takuto was shaking. He kept repeating words of reassurance into his head.
He does not think that. It's the mind control. You never did that. Don't cry.
Then why do his words sound so real?
Ran, did I really... Did I really hurt you this way?
"B-but", Takuto tried to answer, "it was you who taught me how fun this sport is! It was you, who made me love soccer as much as I do now!"
"And it was a mistake", the defender cut coldly. "Listen, Shindou," - and the musician felt stabbed hearing him call him by his family name while they were in private - "we never had anything in common safe for this farce of an hobby. I don't even know why I was friends with you anymore. Just as why I loved this disgusting sport. I took pity on you so I let you in, but it's over. Now, get out of my house, never come again, and forget about me. Don't you ever talk to me again, for all you inspire me is hate and disgust."
Hate and disgust.
It clicked in his mind. His friendship with Ranmaru was born from soccer. It thrived with soccer. Revolved around soccer. They saw each other everyday at the club.
Their love for each other was born from their love for soccer, and deeply intertwined with it.
Thus, by replacing Ranmaru's love for soccer by hatred, it did so for their friendship.
Shindou was about to collapse from the realization, but forced himself to keep his composure.
"Alright", the playmaker answered, head lowered, trying to sound as calm and composed he could. "Sorry for bothering you. Sorry for failing you as a friend."
He turned around and left the room. His defeated gaze met Chika's, who reciprocated the sadness in her own eyes. Shindou left the Kirino's house, and as he turned around to grab a last sight of his best friend's place, he whispered:
"I promise I will make things right."
The facade he had put on could no longer hold, and he broke down into a stream of tears.