Chapter Text
Ricky felt like the universe was playing a cruel joke on him. One moment he was happily spending time with his son and the next, he was standing face to face with the person he least wanted to see. All he wanted to do now was carry Ruiran into his arms and run, to get away from here and never look back. But he couldn’t, because he was sure this time Gyuvin wasn't going to let him.
And then, the alpha let out a small chuckle.
"I didn’t know," he said, voice lighter than Ricky expected, "that the kid Hanbin-hyung and Hao-hyung were babysitting was yours."
Ricky wanted the ground to swallow him whole right then and there. Gyuvin didn't know. Of course, he didn't know. Even after seeing Ruiran at the park that day, Gyuvin must’ve thought that he was just some random kid their friends agreed to take care of for a little while. But now, Ricky could see realization coming slowly to Gyuvin's eyes.
The omega opened his mouth and tried to speak, but no words came out. He wanted to say something, to explain, to deny—to just do anything except stand there like an idiot. He met Gyuvin's eyes and he wished he hadn’t because the other boy was looking at him with such sharp and unreadable eyes that made Ricky feel small, exposed and vulnerable.
Ruiran who was still clutching Ricky's hand looked up at him and then at Gyuvin. His face lighting up slightly with recognition at the alpha. He tugged at his mother's fingers and tried to walk toward Gyuvin but Ricky instinctively pulled him back.
"Mama?"
That seemed to take both of the adults attention. The two of them looked at Ruiran who was looking up at Ricky, confusion written on the toddler’s face. Ricky swallowed then forced himself to smile down at the child. Gyuvin was still watching them, waiting for the omega to say something but Ricky had no idea what to say.
Then, Gyuvin spoke again. "...Is this why you were gone for more than a year?"
Ricky stiffened at that. He didn't respond, didn't move—just kept standing there, his grip tightening around Ruiran’s small hand like he was trying to calm himself.
"Is this why you left without telling anyone?"
"Why you barely talked to us?"
"Why Hao-hyung and Hanbin-hyung always get weird when I bring you up?"
The questions continued, one after another, each one breaking away at the fragile wall Ricky had desperately been trying to hold up. His fingers curled tighter around Ruiran’s tiny hand. This was good, Gyuvin still wasn’t catching up. He was asking questions, but he hadn’t pieced it together yet, he hadn’t connected the dots in the way Ricky was dreading.
Ruiran, feeling the way his mother’s hand had tightened around his, let out a small noise and called out for him again.
"Mama?"
The soft, innocent voice snapped Ricky out of his spiraling thoughts. He took a sharp breath, closing his eyes before opening them again, looking down at the small child beside him. Ruiran was looking up at him with round, curious eyes. His little brows furrowed at the way Ricky was holding his hand so tightly.
Immediately, Ricky loosened his grip and bent down, scooping Ruiran into his arms. He pressed a soft kiss to his son's forehead to comfort both Ruiran and himself. When he looked back at Gyuvin, he felt his stomach drop.
Gyuvin’s expression was still unreadable. But Ricky could clearly see it, the slow turning of gears in his mind, the flicker of more realization coming into his eyes. Panic crawled its way up Ricky’s throat, he held Ruiran closer to himself, held him more protectively. His mind shouted at him to escape, to run, to stop whatever conclusion Gyuvin was about to come to.
Before Gyuvin could open his mouth, Ricky spoke first. "Ruiran and I need to go home."
The way he said it was rushed, it barely counted as an explanation, barely a goodbye. He turned around, ready to get out of here before anything else could be said, before his worst fear became a reality. Ricky was barely able to take one step foraward when he felt a strong, warm hand wrapping around his arm. Ricky froze, his body stiffening from the contact.
Gyuvin wasn’t letting him leave.
The alpha's grip on his arm wasn't painful enough to make Ricky wince but it was firm enough that it made him feel trapped. He knew he could shake Gyuvin's hand off him, but the way he was holding him made Ricky hesitate. Gyuvin was holding him like he was something fragile, like if held on too tight Ricky would shatter and slip through his fingers once again.
Then Gyuvin asked the question Ricky dreaded the most.
"Who's the father?"
His breath hitched. He couldn’t even meet Gyuvin's eyes this time. He just kept staring at the ground, holding onto Ruiran tightly. Ricky let the silence stretch between them. He didn't know what to answer—no, he didn't want to answer. Because once he did, everything he tried so hard to protect and keep hidden from the very man in front of him would finally be laid bare.
Gyuvin, sensing that he was not getting any answers from the omega anytime soon asked again and this time, his voice was quieter.
"Ricky… is it me?"
Ricky clenched his jaw, still staring at the ground, still refusing to meet Gyuvin’s gaze. His throat was tight, like it was closing up, like if he tried to speak, he would choke on the words he didn’t want to say. Gyuvin kept waiting. Then, when the silence stretched for too long, something shifted in him. He exhaled sharply, and his grip tightened on Ricky’s arm.
"Ricky," he demanded, voice rising now, more forceful, almost desperate. "Is. It. Me?"
"Ricky, answer me!"
The omega flinched. The space around them was thick with the smell of both of their pheremones. Ricky's strawberry scent souring more and more as time kept ticking by, mixing with the distressed smell coming off from Gyuvin's dark chocolate scent.
And then—
A small, broken wail was heard. Ruiran had started crying. His tiny hands holding desperately onto Ricky’s shirt, his fingers curling into the fabric, as if he could feel the tension and the distress in the air.
"Mama!" he sobbed, burying his face into Ricky’s shoulder, his tiny body trembling.
As soon as Ruiran's cry broke through the silence, the atmosphere immediately shifted. Gyuvin instantly let go of Ricky’s arm. The realization of what he had just done dawning at him. The way he had raised his voice, the way he had scared the child seemed to hit him all at once.
When Gyuvin let go of him, he didn't waste a second. Ricky immediately turned his attention to Ruiran and rocked him gently, whispering soothing words into his hair, rubbing small circles on his back to calm him down. All while the only thing Gyuvin could do was stare at them, not knowing what to do.
When Ruiran's sobs quieted a bit, Ricky slightly tilted his head at Gyuvin, still not quite looking at his direction. "Not here," he said, voice shaking. He tightened his arms around Ruiran, swaying slightly to soothe him. "Not in front of him."
Gyuvin didn’t say anything. But when Ricky finally dared to look at him, he wished he hadn’t. Because on Gyuvin’s face, there was everything Ricky had been trying to avoid.
Hurt. Betrayal. Confusion.
His brows were furrowed, lips parted slightly like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how. His hands had curled into fists at his sides but he wasn’t reaching out anymore. His scent was heavy and suffocating. Gyuvin had always had a strong presence but right now it felt too much, like it was closing in on Ricky. He turned away, he couldn’t bear another second looking at Gyuvin. He adjusted his hold on Ruiran, who was still sobbing against his shoulder and forced his feet to move.
"Ricky."
Gyuvin's voice stopped him in his tracks, but he didn’t turn around. "We need to talk about this," Gyuvin said, voice low. Ricky squeezed his eyes shut then, without another word, he started walking again and the alpha didn’t stop him this time.
—
Ricky felt like he was suffocating.
Every step he took felt like the air was being punched out from his lungs and he didn't know how to properly breath anymore. Ruiran was still crying, his fists gripping tightly at Ricky’s shirt, his little body trembling in distress. Ricky didn’t know what to do he was already holding him close, already whispering soft words, already rubbing circles into his back. But nothing was working.
He was getting overwhelmed.
His heart pounded hard against his chest as he forced himself to keep walking. His legs felt stiff, his body felt heavy and he couldn't control his pheremones. The scent of his own distress was spilling into the air a lot and he could tell people were starting to notice. He could hear the whispers. Murmurs from strangers as he passed by, their eyes flickering toward him and his crying child.
“Is that an omega?”
“His scent—he smells so upset.”
“That poor kid, he must be scared too.”
Ricky wanted to scream at them. He wanted to tell them to mind their own business, to stop staring, to stop making it worse. But the only thing he could do was breath heavily, his emotions pressing against his chest, making it hard to breathe. The only thing keeping him moving was that he knew his apartment wasn’t far now, it was just a few more blocks.
Ruiran let out another wail, loud and broken, and Ricky’s breath stuttered. the volume of it made his ears ring and suddenly everything seemed too loud. The street noise and the whispers—it was all too much. Ricky tightened his grip on his son, adjusted him slightly in his arms, and started walking faster. He needed to get home fast, he needed to get out of here.
His scent was spiraling further out of control and he hated it. Omegas weren’t supposed to let their emotions get like this in public. It made them vulnerable and worst of all, It made people stare. But Ricky couldn’t help it, not after what had just happened, mot when Gyuvin had looked at him like that and especially not when Gyuvin had finally found out.
Ricky shook his head, trying to push the thoughts away. He just needed to focus on getting home. When the apartment building finally came into view, relief washed over him so hard it nearly made his knees buckle. He hurried inside, ignoring the way the doorman glanced at him in concern, ignoring the stares from people in the lobby. He just needed to get to the elevator, just needed to—
The elevator doors slid open.
Empty.
Ricky stepped inside and quickly pressed the button to his floor. As soon as the doors shut, he let out a shaky breath. Ruiran was still sniffling against his shoulder, but his sobs had quieted into little hiccups. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered and pressed a kiss to Ruiran’s soft hair, rocking him gently. “I’m so sorry.”
He didn’t even know what he was apologizing for. For getting overwhelmed? For making Ruiran feel scared? For everything?
Finally the elevator doors slid open. Ricky walked out, fumbled with his keys, and finally stepped inside his apartment.
The moment Ricky stepped inside the apartment, his legs nearly gave out. His body felt too heavy like the world was trying to crush him into the floor. Ruiran was still clinging to him, arms wrapped around his neck, his face buried against Ricky’s shoulder. He could still feel his son slightly shaking, his hiccups that still hadn’t fully subsided.
But Ricky didn’t know how to comfort him anymore, not when he could barely keep himself together.
His scent was suffocating now, spilling more uncontrollably into the air. it clung to his skin, to his clothes, to Ruiran. He knew it had to be overwhelming, that it was likely covering every corner and furniture in the apartment, but he couldn’t stop it, didn't even know how. He couldn’t calm himself much less the toddler clinging tightly onto him.
When his mother sensed and smelled everthing, she was already there. Moving faster than he had ever seen her move before. One second, Ricky was barely managing to stand in the doorway the next his mother was at his side, her hands steadying him.
"Quanrui," she said, her voice filled with worry. She immediately took Ruiran out of his arms, holding the boy close against her chest as she shifted to support Ricky’s weight.
"Come, sweetheart," she murmured, guiding him forward. She released her own pheremones, hoping that it could calm her son, hoping that it could provide some sort of comfort to him. "Let’s sit down, okay?" Ricky could only nod weakly, too exhausted to resist.
His mother led him to the couch, not once letting go of him and not once letting him fall. She guided her son carefully all while holding Ruiran, the toddler was quiet now, he was now nestled against her, his hands gripping the collar of her blouse, his cheek pressed to her shoulder. Ruiran must have finally weared himself out from all the crying, but even in his drowsy state he probably felt the way his grandmother's scent was spilling into the air, slowly replacing the distressing scent Ricky was giving out earlier. The child looked visibly more relaxed now, eyes half lidded, the sobbing and shaking now replaced with even out breathing.
When they finally reached the couch, she guided him down gently, keeping a steadying hand on his shoulder as he sat down. Ricky melted into the cushion, like his body finally gave out. He felt like he had been running a marathon with no end. His mother sat down next to him. She didn't say anything, she just held Ruiran, rubbing soothing circles into his back while her other hand never once let go of Ricky.
Then, softly, she spoke. "Sweetheart… what happened?"
Ricky squeezed his eyes shut. Where would he even start?
He didn’t answer. It's not that he didn’t want to—it's that he couldn’t. He felt his throat tightening up again, like he couldn't form a single coherent word without choking on it. He barely even noticed how his body was now shaking, he barely noticed when his fingers weakly gripped the fabric of his mother's blouse, or did he even noticed how his breath kept coming out uneven. Most importantly he didn’t even noticed the tears rolling down his cheeks.
The tears wouldn’t stop.
They kept falling down silently, one after another, rolling down his cheeks before dripping down onto his shirt. His mother just silently watched him, letting Ricky let it all out. She didn't press him, demand any answers or force him to speak about what happened for him to break down like this. Instead, she silently stayed beside him. Letting her presence comfort him, her scent continuing to flow steadily around them.
Ricky barely noticed when she shifted closer, barely noticed when she adjusted Ruiran in her arms and freed a hand to gently run through his hair. The motion was so achingly familiar, so soft and gentle, that it nearly broke him all over again.
"It’s okay, darling," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "Let it out."
Her fingers combed through his hair, slowly and gently, just like she used to do when he was younger. His mother would often do this whenever Ricky couldn’t sleep or when he had an awful nightmare too shaken up to go back to sleep alone, so she would stay by his side, combing her fingers through his hair, while she hummed until sleep finally took over her son again.
Ricky wasn’t a child anymore. But in that moment, he felt just as small.
His mother’s touch never faltered or slowed. She kept soothing Ricky as he cried, letting him fall apart quietly by her side. She didn’t rush him, didn’t push him, didn’t fill the space with empty words or meaningless reassurances, she just let him be and stayed by his side.
For a long while, Ricky just sat there in silence, his tears falling quietly, his chest aching, his body slightly trembling as he quietly sobbed. He didn’t know how much time had passed before his mother spoke again her voice even softer than before.
"You’re doing your best, Quanrui," she whispered. "And that’s enough."
Ricky felt another wave of tears slipping free. He didn’t feel like he was. He didn’t feel like anything he was doing was enough, but right now, he didn’t have the strength to say that. So he just leaned into her touch, let her scent surround him, let her cradle him as he quietly cried again.
Eventually, Ricky's tears stopped. His mother hadn’t moved from his side. She stayed, her fingers still softly playing with his hair. At some point, Ruiran fell asleep agaisnt her, his breaths now even and slow, his hands were still slightly holding onto the collar of her blouse.
Ricky let out a slow, shaky exhale. His eyes were dry now, the earlier tears leaving his face tight, his body exhausted but the weight in his chest had loosened slightly, just enough for him to finally find his voice. He took another deep breath, staring down at his hands before forcing the words out.
"I ran into him," he said, voice hoarse from crying.
His mother’s fingers stilled briefly in his hair. Then, after a pause, they resumed their slow and gentle motion. She didn’t ask who, didn’t press him to clarify because she already knew.
Ricky had never told her who Ruiran’s father was. He had never spoken a word about it, had never offered any explanation. At first both his mother and father tried to pry that information out of him but Ricky kept his lips sealed, until they just stopped altogether. Maybe they had accepted his silence, had accepted the fact that whatever had happened in that part of his life, he wasn’t ever going to talk about it.
But now, she knew. Even if she didn't know his name, didn’t know his face, but she knew that this was a lot for Ricky—more than a lot.
"Ah," was all she said at first.
Just a soft, understanding sound, barely audible in the quiet space between them. Ricky’s hands clenched in his lap. His nails bit into his palms. He didn’t even know why he was telling her now. Maybe because it felt too big to keep inside anymore. Maybe because Gyuvin finally found everything out. Maybe because the moment had already shattered, and there was nothing left to protect. Maybe because some part of him just needed to hear her voice, needed to know that she was still there, that she still saw him.
His mother let out a small breath, shifting slightly on the couch to get a better look at him. "Did he—did he recognize Ruiran?"
Ricky swallowed, shaking his head. "Not at first." His voice was quiet. "But… he figured it out."
"He—" His voice caught. He swallowed again, trying to get the words out. "He asked if I left because of Ruiran."
His mother didn't say anything, she was just quietly waiting, letting her son speak uninterrupted.
"He kept asking questions," Ricky continued, staring down at the floor now, his breathing uneven. "And I—" He exhaled, feeling his chest tighten again, though it wasn’t as overwhelming this time. "I couldn’t answer. I just wanted to leave, but then he—"
Ricky closed his eyes, everything that happened at the park earlier coming back to him. The way Gyuvin had looked at him, the slow, creeping realization, the confusion and hurt, the way his voice had risen. The way Ruiran had started crying at the way Gyuvin shouted. The way Ricky’s own scent had spiked, the way Gyuvin had let go when he heard Ruiran’s cries. And worst of all, the way he had looked at Ricky, like the entire world had tilted off its axis.
Ricky’s stomach twisted. "I told him we couldn’t talk about it there," he whispered. "Not in front of Ruiran."
His mother hummed softly. Not in agreement, not in disapproval—just to let him know she was listening.
Ricky wet his lips, his throat still raw. "I walked away. He… he didn’t stop me."
His mother didn't reply immediately. Then, she let out a quiet sigh, shifting Ruiran slightly in her arms so she could turn to face him more fully. And then, she asked gently, "How do you feel?"
Ricky let out a small, humorless laugh. "Like shit."
His mother gave a soft chuckle at that. "I mean it," she said, her voice quieter this time. "What do you want to do now?"
Ricky inhaled sharply and avoided her eyes. He didn’t have an answer to her question. Because the truth was—he didn’t even know what he wants to do anymore. He had spent so long running from this, from Gyuvin, from the possibility of this moment ever happening. But now it did happen. Now Gyuvin knew, not everything, not all of it, but enough. Enough for the questions to start and enough for the truth to catch up to him.
Ricky closed his eyes again, pressing his palm against them. He felt so drained right now. "I don’t know," he admitted, voice small.
"You need to figure it out."
Ricky tensed at his mother's words. It wasn’t said cruelly. There was no force behind it, no sharp edge to her voice. It was said with quiet understanding.
"You don’t have to know the answer right now," she continued, her hand warm against him "But you can’t run from this forever. Especially now that Ruiran's father know."
Ricky swallowed, his throat feeling tight again. He could feel the sting of fresh tears behind his eyes, but he blinked them back, staring down at his lap. His mother shifted beside him, adjusting Ruiran in her arms so the little boy could sleep more comfortably in her arms.
"You need to talk to him," she said, still quiet, still soft. "Properly."
Ricky’s jaw clenched. "I don’t know if I can."
"Why?"
Because I’m scared. Because I don’t know how to look at him and explain why I left without telling him. Because I don’t know if he’ll hate me for it. Because I don’t know if I can bear hearing him say any of it.
Ricky didn’t say any of that. Instead, he just pressed his lips together. "It’s complicated."
His mother gave him a knowing look. "It is," she agreed. "But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try."
Ricky let out a small, bitter laugh, letting his head fall back against the couch. "You make it sound so easy."
His mother smiled faintly. "It’s not. But avoiding it won’t make it any easier."
Ricky exhaled harshly through his nose. He knew she was right. Of course she was right. She had always been the one person in his life who spoke sense into him when he needed it the most, but knowing that didn’t make it any less terrifying.
His mother reached out, brushing a strand of hair from his face. "What are you so afraid of?" she asked again.
Everything. That he’ll be angry. That he’ll say things I'm not ready to hear. That he’ll demand answers I don't know how to give.
That he’ll want to be part of Ruiran’s life.
Or worse that he won’t.
Ricky didnt say any of that again, he just said, voice small. "I don’t know."
His mother studied him, her gaze lingering. "You do," she murmured. "You just don’t want to say it."
Ricky bit the inside of his cheek and didn't answer. His mother sighed lightly, but it wasn’t a frustrated sound. Just patient. Just understanding. "You don’t have to do it today," she said. "But you do have to do it, Quanrui."
He wanted to argue, wanted to insist that he wasn’t ready, that he couldn’t do this but what was the point?
She was right.
Ricky swallowed hard, looking away from her. His gaze landed on Ruiran, small and peaceful in his mother’s arms, his soft cheek pressing against her shoulder. He had spent the past year protecting this, protecting Ruiran, protecting himself. But now, the truth had finally caught up to him annd whether he liked it or not, whether he was ready or not, he was going to have to face it.
—
Ricky sat at the edge of his bed, his fingers absentmindedly playing with the fabric of his blanket, his mind was a mess, like a broken music player playing an endless loop of everything that happened today. He insisted on taking Ruiran with him to his room, wanting to feel his son soft sleeping body beside him, but her mother argued that he needed rest and insisted that he needed to sleep uninterrupted. When she did, Ricky hadn't really argued back, too tired to to protest but now he wished he had. Because now he was alone, and being alone meant being left with nothing but his thoughts.
And his thoughts were suffocating him.
He layed down on his back, staring at the ceiling. He closed his eyes, forcing himself to just sleep through all the noise in his head, he even tried to count sheeps to distract himself from his thoughts, but nothing was working. he turned to his side, then onto his other side, then turned to lay flat on his back again. Fuck, he was getting restless. With a groan he sat back up and reached for his phone on the nightstand to check the time. 12:47 AM.
His body felt exhausted, drained from all the emotions that had flooded through him since running into Gyuvin, but despite being exhausted his mind just wouldn't shut up and let him sleep. Ricky was getting frustrated and restless more and more, he needed to get out of here, he needed to talk to someone.
He opened his contacts, his fingers hovered over the screen for a second before he tapped on the one contact he had always turned to whenever he was a mess and didn't know what to do.
The phone rang. Once. Twice. Three times. On the fourth ring, a tired but familiar voice answered.
"Ricky? What the hell, it’s—" there was a pause, a rustling of sheets as Hao shifted, probably checking the time. "It’s almost one in the morning."
Ricky didn’t respond right away. He felt a stong wave of déjà vu crash into him. Because this felt way too familiar. It felt just like that time he was drowning in his own thoughts during his early pregnancy, shaking, terrified uncertain what to do and just like that night, Hao was the one he called.
"Ricky?" Hao’s voice was clearer now, more awake. Concern creeping into him from the lack of response. "What’s wrong?"
Ricky swallowed around the lump in his throat. He didn't realized his hands were trembling until he tightened his grip on his phone. Finally, he whispered, "Can you meet me outside my apartment?"
There was a shuffling sound, the rustle of blankets, and then Hanbin’s groggy voice in the background. "Hyung? What’s going on?"
"Go back to sleep," Hao murmured softly to his boyfriend. Hanbin groaned, then Ricky could hear the soft shuffle of bedsheets as he rolled over. "Come back before sunrise," he mumbled before knocking out again.
Hao ignored him and spoke directly back to Ricky again. "I’ll be there in fifteen."
With that the line went dead. He could survive fifteen more minutes. He stepped out of his room, his feet moving quietly against the floor. His mother’s room was just down the hall. He knew that if he walked there and opened the door he would find Ruiran curled up against her, sleeping peacefully. But he decides against and turned away. Ricky slipped on his jacket, put on some shoes, grabbed his keys, and stepped outside.
The elevator ride was uneventful, the apartment building was quiet this late at night, the only people in the lobby were the doorman and the staff at the front desk who greeted him as he walked by, Ricky returned the greeting with a small smile not wanting to seem rude.
Ricky sat crouched in front of his apartment building, arms wrapped tightly around himself. It was too cold outside, but he didn't care, his thoughts were too pre occupied with the events that happened today—well, yesterday considering the time now.
Gyuvin had figured it out. He now knows that he has a child and Ricky instead of explaining to Gyuvin everything, just ran. He ran away, too scared to face the truth.
He squeezed his eyes shut, inhaling sharply. He could feel the familiar scent of distress spilling out from him again. He hated this, hated how his emotions could easily be deciphered just from his smell alone. He hated how it made him feel so weak and vulnerable.
Minutes passed with just ricky sitting there drowning in his own thoughts again. He didnt know exactly how long he was there but after some time he felt someone approaching or rather smell.
He smelled the it before he even lifted his head to see who it was. The scent of jasmine mixed with peaches could only belong to one person he was very familiar with. Ricky didn’t look up, nor did he move, even as the figure came closer and eventually stood directly in front of him. He just stayed curled in on himself, like he was trying to make himself as small as he felt.
"Ricky."
Slowly, Ricky lifted his head.
And thats when Hao saw everthing. The way Ricky looked more exhausted than usual. His usual sharp and refined features dulled by weariness, there were heavy bags under his eyes, and Hao could clearly see how red and swollen they were, like he’d been crying for hours on end. He could also smell the distress scent that was still faintly rolling off from Ricky.
Hao’s heart ached. No matter how many times he sees his friend like this it always hurt just the same. Watching someone you care about slowly fall apart and not knowing how to hold all the pieces for them.
"...You look like shit," he said softly, but there was no teasing in his tone.
Ricky let out a small, broken-sounding chuckle. "I feel like shit."
Hao crouched down in front of him, mirroring his position. "Come here," he murmured.
He wrapped his arms around Ricky, pulling him into a tight embrace. Rickt rested his forehead against Hao's shoulder. The older omega's scent wrapping around him, soothing him. Hao released a steady wave of calming pheremones, not too much just enough for Ricky to feel warm and safe.
Ricky's own scent began to soften, sour strawberries slowly turning sweeter, his distress slowly being replaced by calmness under the steady warmth of Hao’s scent and presence. Hao, who had always been there. Hao, who had picked up his call at 1 AM without hesitation.
"...I ran into him," Ricky whispered after a long moment.
Hao didn’t have to ask who his friend was talking about, he already knew even without Ricky telling him all the details.
His arms tightened around Ricky. "Tell me everything."
Not once did Hao let go, not when Ricky's body began to tremble, not when he felt the fabric of his jacket slowly getting damped, and especially not when Ricky’s scent, which had started to calm, turned sour and distressed all over again. He jusy kept holding the younger omega in his arms, kept releasing calm, soothing pheremones around them.
They just sat there, Hao quietly holding onto Ricky as the latter wept. They didn't move for a long while, until finally Hao murmured, "Let’s go somewhere quieter."
Ricky hesitated at first, then, with a small nod, he let Hao guide him.
They ended up in a small park a few blocks away, where the noise of the city faded into the rustling of trees and the soft chirping of crickets. The park was mostly empty, except for a stray cat curled up near a bench. They walked over to a nearby bench and Ricky sat down first, his hands clasped tightly together. Hao sat beside him, giving him space but never truly leaving his side.
The park they had found themselves in wasn’t the same one where Ricky had run into Gyuvin earlier—he had made sure of that. He couldn’t handle being in that place again, not yet. So they wandered somewhere else instead.
Ricky stared at the ground, his breathing shallow. His mind was still racing from endless thoughts. "He asked me if Ruiran was the reason why I disappeared," he finally spoke, his voice hoarse. "He kept asking questions, and I—I just stood there, hoping he wouldn’t realize it."
"But then… then he asked me who the father was." He continued. "And when I didn’t answer, he asked me if it was him."
Hao sucked in a sharp breath.
Ricky let out a bitter, broken laugh. "He figured it out, hyung. I saw it in his face. The way he looked at me—at Ruiran—he knew. And I—" His voice cracked.
"I ran," he whispered. "Again."
Ricky squeezed his eyes shut, his grip on his own hands tightening. His nails dug into his palms, trying to calm himself, trying to stop the way his chest kept hurting.
"I ran, and now I don’t know what to do." His voice was barely above a whisper. "I don’t know what to do, hyung."
Hao shifted closer to Ricky, then placed a hand on his shoulder. "Ricky." His voice was gentle but firm. "Look at me."
Ricky hesitated before finally meeting his eyes.
"You have to talk to him."
"You have to."
Ricky shook his head, distress coming back into his scent. "Not yet—"
"Then when?" Hao asked. "Next week? Next month? Another year from now?"
Hao sighed, then continued speaking. "I’m not saying you have to do it now, Ricky. But you need to face this. Like I said—" He hesitated before continuing, "Gyuvin deserves to know, it's been too long."
Deep down, Ricky knew that. He knew that this wasn’t something he could run from forever. But knowing it and facing it were two entirely different things. His hands trembled slightly as he exhaled. "I just… I don’t know how to do this."
Hao didn't say anything back immediately, instead he reached for Ricky's hands and held them tightly in his own.
"I’m here. Always."
Ricky swallowed past the lump in his throat. "...I know."
After a while of just sitting there in silence, they decided to walk for a little bit, so that Ricky could take his mind off of things even if only a little. As they walked side by side, neither of them said much, they didn't really have to. After being friends for so long they both knew when to just let the comfortable silence take over the space between them and just simple exist.
For once since today—yesterday, Ricky felt peaceful.
Ricky inhaled deeply, filling his lungs with the cold air, as if trying to push out the lingering distress in his body. The sharp and painful emotions had dulled by now, though they were still there. But Hao's presence beside him kept him from straying too deep into his own head. Whenever the older omega noticed Ricky slipping too deep into his thoughts again, he would fill the space with random chatter, sometimes a question, sometimes just pointing out something he saw, little things to keep Ricky distracted, even if just for a while. Hao had always been good at that.
Then, after a while, Hao spoke, his voice quiet. “Do you regret it?”
Ricky knew what he was asking. He let out a slow exhale, watching as the faint puff of his breath disappeared into the cold air.
“…No.”
There was no hesitation in his answer. Even after everything—even after the heartbreak, the fear, the overwhelming uncertainty—he didn’t regret Ruiran. Not for a single second.
Hao hummed softly, as if he had expected that answer.
“…But you’re scared.”
“Terrified.”
Nothing else was said more after that and they kept walking. At some point, Ricky glanced at Hao and saw the way his friend’s eyes were slightly drooping, his steps slower than before. He chuckled softly, nudging him.
“You should’ve just gone back to sleep.”
The older let out a tired laugh, rubbing his eyes. “And let you sit outside your apartment building alone at one in the morning? Not a chance.”
Ricky shook his head, smiling slightly despite himself. “You’re ridiculous.”
Hao only bumped their shoulders together lightly. Ricky sighed, the weight in his chest was still there, but somehow, talking with Hao helped. It always did.
They kept walking, aimlessly, for what felt like hours. By the time they finally decided to head home, the sun was already peeking through the horizon. The world was still quiet, the streets were still mostly empty except for the people on their early morning jog. Ricky let himself pretend even if only for a little bit that everything was fine. That this wasn’t something he would eventually have to face. That Gyuvin hadn’t looked at him with betrayal in his eyes. That the truth hadn’t unraveled in the worst possible way.
But the moment him and Hao parted ways, the moment he stepped back into the apartment, the pretending stopped. And just like that reality hit him all over again.