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1.
“I need girl advice.” Her brother’s resigned voice bled through the phone. Allison scooted up from where she laid on her lofted bed, almost hitting her head.
“You. Girl advice. I thought you were too busy with your history shit?” She asked incredulously.
Her brother, Richard (she refused to call him Dick. That name was reserved for their father, although not in a familial-fun-nickname way) did not call often, when he did it was short and polite. He also did not ask for advice, ever. He and Helen were the responsible ones, while Allison was the trainwreck.
“No this isn’t a pick-up thing, I just said something to a girl that was… poorly worded, and she took offense.” He sighed.
“What did you say?”
“My friend Adam thought that this waitress at a restaurant we always go to was cute.” She had definitely heard of said friend from Helen, carefully prying Allison on the phone on what more she knew about him. She did not think her younger siblings realized how little the other talked to her. “So, I decided to approach her and ask if she would like to sit with us. Adam’s terribly shy but I thought I would give him the chance.”
“While she was working?”
“Yes, I know, that’s what she told me. Then I suggested that I could pay for the time she’d be working.”
“Ohmygod you did not say that!” Allison groaned. She thought of Matt when he first met Dan, and how unbearably awkward he had been around her, especially with talks of money.
“I did not mean it that way! But she accused me of calling her a prostitute in a very angry manner, and then the whole thing went south.”
“So are you just trying to save your regular dinner spot then? Why do you even care?” It was not like her brother to care this much about some random girl if it distracted him from his quest.
“Well, she might be connected to the Glendower search.” Oh, well that makes more sense. “Apparently Adam called and invited her to come searching with us, in Helen’s chopper. Who knows if Blue will show, but I figured I’d want to be prepared.” His tone was light and steady, but if Allison knew anything, it was jealousy. It was a tool that she could use very capably, but it seemed as if Gansey was not aware himself of his feelings.
“So your friend is bringing a first date, named Blue, on a helicopter. Helen’s helicopter, that you are also going to be on, to help you search for a dead Welsh King?”
“Well, Ronan’s also going to be there as well. Maybe Noah as well?”
“Jesus Christ Rich, not Ronan too. This poor girl.” Ronan Lynch was not someone she met very many times. He was however, a sore spot. How their father could accept Gansey babysitting an honestly terrifying teenager, but disapprove her while sometimes troublesome, but adult relationship with Seth never made sense to her. But it was a rule that had dictated them from the beginning. The Gansey’s and the one Reynolds.
“But how do I apologize? We met again briefly but there was a lot going on there as well.”
“Look, Rich. She’s not your date, so just be kind and respectful. Don’t act like Dad. You are seventeen years old!” She looked at the time. “Shit, I have practice soon. Tell your friend and the waitress to enjoy their weird-ass date with you and the viper!”
She hung up before he could say anything else.
Dan walked into their dorm room, and gestured to the phone, “Who were you calling?” It was a fox thing, it was rare that they even talked to people outside the team, hence them being foxes. This did not help the cult allegations.
She sighed dramatically and examined her nails, “My brother. Called his friend’s date a prostitute.” Dan’s eyes widened as she lifted her hand to help Allison off of the lofted bed.
“Never change, Dick.” Dan said, as they walked out the room to practice. Maybe her brother never would change, Allison thought. Unlucky for the poor waitresses of the world.
2.
They did not call again for around a month, but her next call with Richard was just as alarming as the first.
“How do you tell if someone’s having an overdose?”
“It is 1:00 am, I’m at a club, where you should be! What are you talking about?” Seth gestured to the phone and mouthed who? When Allison responded, he mouthed dick then flipped off her phone. Lovely, her boyfriend.
“I’m 17.”
“Yeah, duh. I’m sure Ronan can get you a fake. But you need to go out more, and also change your dumbass clothing.” She got Seth’s attention, and gestured to the hallway, he gave a thumbs up and moved to the centre of their booth, while she walked to a quieter area. “K, I can hear now. But is someone having an overdose?”
“Well not currently, I wouldn’t have let you bully me about not partying if someone was.” He said petulantly. “I’m just worried about Ronan is all.”
So it was Ronan Lynch. While Allison had been stuck between California and D.C, the Reynolds and the Gansey’s, Gansey had always seen captivated by the Lynch’s. (Frankly, she had made out with Declan Lynch when she was 17, on her last visit to Washington, and it had not been great.) She would never tell Richard though, because she was certain he would kill her if he interfered with his friendship with Ronan.
“So Ronan is doing drugs?” It wasn’t surprising in the least, it was always the churchy ones who broke first. Except Renee, of course. But she went the opposite direction.
“I don’t know. He’s drinking as well, hanging out with these crazy assholes. I can’t control it, but I need to know at least the basics.”
“You aren’t his Dad, Rich. You aren’t Declan either.”
“I know, but I just can’t help it, seeing him destroy himself like this, you don’t understand.”
Allison looked out then, to the dancefloor, and met Seth’s stare. He grinned at her, and laughed as she gestured to the phone again, impatiently.
“Yes. I understand, dick. If you’re really that concerned, check his pockets, keep track of his appetite and schedule. Tuck him in by 7..”
“Allison.”
“Overdoses. Usually they’re out, but they can also be choking, but they’ll look dead, pretty much. You’d know when you’d see it.” Even describing it made her feel clammy. “But, more importantly, how are the Henrietta ladies?”
“Well, I’m too busy for ladies. But Jane has been very useful in my search, she’s utterly fascinating.”
“Who the fuck is Jane?”
“Jane is Blue, Adam’s girlfriend- well ex-girlfriend it seems like.” Allison couldn't even bother questioning the changing of the names. it was typical Gansey Behaviour.
“The waitress prostitute girl?”
“Oh, she would hate you calling her that. But yes she’s wonderful.” His voice changed a little bit, almost unnoticeable. But Allison was very good at recognizing the signs.
“Richard. Your best friend’s ex-girlfriend. That is not a road you want to go down. That’s dangerous.”
“Yes, I know. She’s just a friend, though.” He sounded a little sad at that. How were men so predictable? “How’s practice?”
“God, we still have like, two months before we even have a game and it’s a shit-show. Kevin is a fucking asshole; the monsters are insane. Least the new kid’s quiet.
“I don’t understand how you do it every day, all those practices.”
“Well, I still don’t understand what the hell you’re searching for.”
“You know, Allison, neither do I some days.” She could hear the exhaustion creeping into his voice.
“Cheers to that. Now please, get drunk and be a kid, kiss a girl, go wild.”
He laughed, and said a little mysteriously, “Maybe, one day. Bye.”
As he hung up, Allison made her way back to their table, and sat beside Seth, which he instinctively met by pulling her in close.
“And how is the third?” Seth asked.
“Oh, you know the same as the shit we’re dealing with, only he still has money.”
“Yeah, really? I bet he doesn’t have to deal with Andrew-fucking-Minyard.”
“No, he’s one of a kind.” She laughed and put her check to his shoulder. Things were good with Seth now, better than they’d be in a while.
This was their year, she knew it.
3.
“Hi Allison, how are you doing?” It was early in the morning, and she was walking from their morning gym practice to back to the dorm.
“Hey. I’m fine, school’s starting in a couple weeks.”
“Yeah, I’m almost back as well.” She struggled to remember how old he even was, he would always be 7 years old to her, in a way. She still remembered his excited face in the airport when she would come to Washington, his little glasses squishing against her face when they hugged.
“Senior year? Must be exciting”
“Yes, of course.” He sounded distracted. “When’s your first game?”
“The Friday after school starts.”
“Oh, I’ll make sure to watch.” Allison wasn’t sure that her brother even understood the basic rules of Exy, much less watched a game
“Why’d you call?” She asked, not bothering to be polite.
“Sorry, If you’re busy…” He said sheepishly, it was not a tone she heard from him often.
“No, I’m not. Why’d you call though?”
“I wanted to apologize. I was talking to Helen yesterday, and we were talking about when you left.” Oh. “I never realized how bad things were for you in California.”
“You were in Washington, then England, then wherever else, Dick.” She said, her tone growing harsher. Her ‘departure from home’ was not discussed by her father’s family, it was carefully skirted around along with topics like ‘why is your son looking for a Welsh king?’ and ‘why the hell are you running for Congress?’
“I know, Dad always left the impression that you left on your own volition. I didn’t know that your mother kicked you out.”
“What did he tell you?”
“We didn’t talk about it a lot, to be honest.” Typical Gansey’s. “He mentioned that you were partying a lot, and fought a lot with her, so you decided to move out.”
“He said that? Richard- They wanted me to fucking party; it kept the Reynold’s relevant. I know you don’t understand with your republican mother, but that wasn’t why they kicked me out. It was Exy. Her and my stepdad didn’t like that I played. When I refused to quit, they kicked me out”
“Jesus Christ, Allison If I had known-”
“Would that have changed anything? You were fourteen, and I wasn’t counting on you anyways.”
“But why didn’t you come back to Washington and stay with us?” Us, as if he hadn’t left.
“Dad didn’t let me.”
“Excuse me?”
“Dad said that if I couldn’t make it work with my mother, that I couldn’t stay in Washington either. It was one or the other, Richard.” Allison still remembered the phone call, it was so polite, as if forcing her to choose between family and passion was a simple inconvenience.
“And you picked Exy.” He didn’t sound surprised. Even if he didn’t understand the appeal of the violent sport, her brother knew what it was like to be pulled from one end to the other. The problem was, he still was trying to pretend he could play both sides.
“And you picked Henrietta. You left at fourteen to study abroad, and didn’t come home, remember? Except you weren’t written out of the goddamn Gansey will.”
“I didn’t know it was that bad, Allison.”
“You didn’t have to, Richard. They let you do whatever shit you want to do, and still be their golden boy. I made my choice.” She hadn’t realized how loud her voice had gotten. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. See you.”
Even though it had been years since she lived with her mother or father, their thoughts still plagued her. Knowing that they had lied, that Helen or Richard got to do all of their shit while she bared their disapproval. It was too much to handle.
She never regretted picking Exy over her family. It brought her friends, a driving passion, a schedule, and it had brought her Seth.
4.
“Hi Allison, It’s Gansey. Sorry I couldn’t call at a better time; I know it’s late but I thought you might be up, but please feel no need to call back soon.
I’m sorry for your loss.
I never met Seth, but he probably didn’t like me very much, which makes sense, I suppose. But I could tell there was something special that connected you two. I never really got how you two would always come back together, even after fighting so often, but I think I realize now how much you love him.
Even if he was an asshole sometimes, your words not mine, he didn’t deserve his end. I know he had been sober, and getting better, and I’m sorry that you have to go through this.
I can’t imagine what you are feeling or going through Allison, but I’ve been close- with Adam and Ronan. Just rely on your friends, please. I know that they will be there for you. Please, let me know if you need anything at all”
Allison quickly pressed 2, to save the message, then turned off her phone. She looked over at Seth’s things, scattered around his dorm, and began to sob.
5.
“Allison?” Her brother’s voice wavered.
“Hey, it’s been a while.” It had been. After their last conversation about their family, Gansey had given her a couple weeks of space. That was, until Seth died. She hadn’t returned the message.
“It has been, how are you doing?”
“Shit.” There really was not another way to put how Allison was doing. She was fighting to survive every day, and it was growing tiring. “I don’t want to talk about it, really.” She was exhausted of people asking if she was okay, friends messaging after years of silence,.
“That’s alright, we don’t have to.”
“I might come back for Christmas. I know it’s still over a month away, but I’m going to book tickets” Allison said. She had received no word from her mother, but her father had extended condolences, with an invitation to spend Christmas in Washington. It would be a stifled affair, but the prospect of seeing Helen and Richard again did make it a bit better. She was still angry at her family, at Riko-fucking-Moriyama, but she couldn’t hold on forever.
“Oh, that’s great, I’m sure Dad and Helen will be thrilled”
“So, will you be there?”
He took a long pause. “I’m getting really close, Allison. To finding what I was looking for.”
“Well, I’m sure you can take a break for a little bit. If Glendower’s been buried there that long I’m sure he can wait a little bit more.”
“We will see, I suppose. But I’m glad you’re patching things up with Dad. I know he can be quite demanding and unreasonable, but I think he misses you. You can also help my mom with her campaign.”
“Hah, very funny, I think Dan would kill me. But you still haven’t answered my question.”
“I don’t want to promise anything that I can’t keep.”
“Promise me you’ll try to come? I can’t handle Helen without you, she won’t stop calling me to set her up with Kevin.”
“I promise. And please give her his number, she won’t lay off Adam either.”
Allison laughed, a comfortable silence loomed between them, uncommon between the two siblings.
“Are you happy in Palmetto? Even with Seth, and everything, are you still okay?”
“It’s tough,” She admitted, “I feel like I’m dying a bit every single day. But someone’s always here to pick me up. I’m not happy right now, but I’m getting there. Are you happy in Henrietta?”
“More than I’ve ever been. I feel grounded, for the first time in a while.”
“You deserve it.” And she was surprised to hear that she really meant it.
“Allison-” He began, but stopped. “Thank you, for everything, I know it hasn’t been easy with your mother, and our family, but you dug through and found a way out. You are made for greatness, you know? Going pro, opening a fashion line, whatever you choose to do, I can see it. Thank you for always listening, and not expecting so much back.”
“Is everything okay?” She asked. Her brother had always been good with words and compliments, but not like this.
“Yes, I’m doing good, don’t worry about me, I’m a changed man, Jane’s even convinced me to get some different shoes.” She laughed, but she couldn’t help but feel that something was off.
“Well, thank god for that. I’ll see you on Christmas, okay?”
“Of course. I love you, goodbye Allison.” And then he was gone.
The call bothered Allison the rest of the day, and the following morning. He had never worried her like that, or spoken all the things unsaid between them. He said he was close to something, but what?
She tried to call him a couple times the next day, but there was still no answer. This led her to calling her sister in a brief moment wedged between class and practice.
Before she could say anything, her sister’s voice cut through, “Allison. Have you heard from Dick?” Helen could wield politeness with ease, but rarely bothered when bossing her siblings around.
“That’s why I was calling. I heard from him a couple days ago, but it was odd.” Allison began to pace outside of Fox Tower.
“He didn’t show up to Mom’s campaign event at his own school. Mom and Dad are both furious. He’s probably out with his merry men and forgot.”
“That doesn’t seem like him.”
“Well, it has been a while since you’ve seen us, hasn’t it? Look, I’ll call around in Henrietta and find out where he is, and let you know. Thanks.” Helen was gone before she could say more.
+1.
Allison was so tired of these fucking drills. Even when she put all her rage in, from Seth, the Ravens, her stupid-fucking family, it felt like nothing was working. She hadn’t heard of anything from her sister since she called yesterday, and every moment filled her with a sense of dread.
Allison was not psychic, but she had known that there was no coming back when she found Seth’s body. She had been in that position so many times with him, but when she saw him she knew that it was the end.
So why did this feel the same?
As they took a too-quick water break from practice, Allison’s phone began to ring, Richard.
“Allison, we have to get a move on.” Kevin complained, but Allison was still staring at her phone. Schrödinger's Cat, she remembered from her physics class. Her brother was both alive and dead. She didn’t want to answer.
“I don’t give a shit. I need to take this.” She turned around without saying a word, only briefly hearing Dan’s voice calling after her.
She answered the call. It was not her brother.
“Hi, is this Allison?” A female voice answered the phone, her Virginian accent elongating her name.
“Yes?”
“This is Blue, I’m Gansey’s friend.”
“Girlfriend.” Allison corrected, trying to delay the inevitable, and confirm her suspicions. Blue did not correct her. “Is he okay? Helen told me he didn’t come to his mom’s event.”
“Yes, he’s okay.” Blue sounded relieved, as if she couldn’t believe herself. He was okay. “Yesterday, he was searching for Glendower in a cave, and there were wasps. HE got stung.”
“He’s not that stupid, is he? Why the hell would he go into a cave?” Her voice wavered. Allison was on her way to Washington when he got stung the first time. She waited at the airport to be driven to their home, only to be brought to the hospital by a driver. His face had been so puffy, and she felt as if she was face to face with a ghost.
“I don’t know,” It sounded like a cop-out, but Allison could hear the anxiety in her voice. “We got him back up, and got him help. He’s safe now, sleeping it off.”
“He mentioned that he was getting close to something, finding Glendower, was this it?” She needed to find out why he had said all of those things to her,
She took a pause, “It’s over now, we found him.” Blue didn’t give any more detail, but her tone was serious. Something more had happened, something she was not saying. “And Gansey’s going to be okay.”
Allison was haunted by finding Seth’s body, but she also could not forget all the times that she thought it was the end, and it wasn’t. The moment where she couldn’t tell the difference between life and death, her boyfriend or a corpse. The chilly hospital rides, long fights she would have with Seth after, the subsequent breakups. The probing questions from her teammates when she was so tired.
There was more to the story, but she couldn’t do the same to Blue.
“Okay, I’ll ask him when he’s doing better. I’m sure he’ll love to explain all the history stuff. So how did Helen and Eleanor react to him missing the fundraiser?”
“I haven’t called, Ganey just asked me to just call you for right now. I think he’ll call them later tonight; I don’t think he wants to deal with the fallout from the campaign shit.” Blue’s voice grew cold, at that. Allison suddenly felt a surge of anger towards her family, that her brother had been close to death, and all they could focus on was his absence from an event.
“So then, you’re the prostitute girl that was dating his best friend- Jane or Blue or whatever?”
She laughed quietly, “Wow, glad he gave me a glowing introduction. But yeah I’m Blue, his girlfriend,” She said the last part shyly, as if it was the first time she’d said it. Allison could hear rustling in the background and a few sparse voices. Blue’s voice got quieter as she addressed the other voices. “Ronan, Adam, I-swear-to-God.”
Her brother was not alone. He had people looking out for him too. “Blue, thanks for calling.” She said quietly.
“No problem, I’m sorry to give you a scare, though. But I’ll have Gansey give you a call back, alright?”
“Okay. Goodbye Blue.” She hung up the phone, and let a sigh of relief. She saw Renee peering into the seating area from the locker-room.
“Everything alright?”
“Yeah, it is now.” She began to scratch her arm lightly with her long-manicured nails. “I was just worried about my brother, he had a reaction from a wasp, but he’s alright now.” Renee was the only one who she told about her brother and her anxieties.
“I’m glad that’s he’s okay.” Renee grabbed her arm, and looped it through her own as they began walking back into the locker room.
“We’re going to win this year, you know? Beat the fucking-ravens and prove them wrong.” Allison said gravely. Only the foxes could understand her sudden switch up of conversation, but everything was connected to Exy for them. It was the reason that they put everything on the court.
“I know, it’s our year. We’re getting so close.” The foxes were going to avenge Seth, and beat Riko Moriyama and prove all of them wrong.
Her brother had found his Raven king, but the Foxes were going to end theirs.