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Sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve the pain that follows me throughout the realms. Did I anger some sort of god? Did fate decide I needed to suffer? Why must I constantly be on the verge of crumbling? Sometimes I wish I could just cease from existence, it would be easier for everyone that way. Cub wouldn’t have to complain about me being stupidly clumsy. Mumbo wouldn’t have to worry about me breaking his red stone anymore. And most of all, Grian wouldn’t have to pretend to care about me…I know he doesn’t, I found that much out in Double Life.
“--Scar are you okay?” A calming but firm hand grips my shoulder.
“Huh? Oh yeah, sorry Pearl. Got lost in my head, full of ideas and stuff, ya know,” I say putting on a classic Scar smile, it’s clear she isn’t conceived. “Really Pearl, I’m okay.” Liar Liar Liar.
“You’d tell me if something was wrong, right?” She looks nervous, her hand giving me a light squeeze.
“Of course,” Liar Liar Liar. She nods, looking down at the smooshed piece of bread in my hand.
“Are you going to eat that or continue trying to turn it into some sort of abstract art?” She smiles sweetly in only a way she can.
“Well dear Pearl, this is my new business, edible art! Brilliant I know, no need to applaud,” She giggles, lightly pushing me.
“Where do you come up with these ideas Scar? I still remember Trader Scar’s, that was truly brilliant,” It forced people to come to me, I was scared of being alone.
“A genius never shares his secrets,” We both dissolve into laughter, but only one of us was genuinely laughing.
*******
“Come back here bird brain!!!” Mumbo shouts as he chases a giggling Grian throughout spawn. “Grian I need that redstone!!!” Grimacing, I watch from afar, wishing I could have that sort of bond with someone, but I can’t. Swinging my axe one final time, the oak tree comes crashing down sending leaves and large splinters flying. Just as I finish pocketing the wood, something crashes into me. I choke on my breath as I try to recover from the shock but it is made difficult by the man sitting on my chest.
“Hi Scar!” Grian smirks as if he wasn’t restricting my breathing. “Fancy meeting you here,”
“Gri–off–can’t-can’t breathe–” I rasp, dark spots appearing in my vision.
“Oh void! I’m so sorry Scar..uh..oh dear. Where’s your inhaler?” He practically throws himself off of me and begins digging through my bags before triumphantly cheering as he produces my inhaler. Taking a deep puff, I finally feel the oxygen return to my lungs. “I’m so sorry Scar! Are you okay? Should I call Cub–”
“I’m fine Gri, just got a little winded,” Liar Liar Liar.
“I’m glad you’re okay Scar, I was really worried about you” You don’t need to lie.
“It was uh good to see you Grian, but I should really get going before it gets dark,”
“Oop yeah, good idea. Wouldn’t want you actually dying,” Dying…
“Bye Grian,” I wave, already walking away, stumbling as an idea circles my mind like a tornado. If Grian said something, I didn’t hear it. The idea taking over my senses.
*******
I sit on the edge of the Boatem hole, one push and it’ll all be over. One push and no one around me will ever have to be in pain. One push and I will be gone. It’s easy so why do I feel scared as I stare down into the obis. No one would care, would they? They wouldn’t. But what if they did? What if they did care? What if I’m making a mistake?
“Scar?! What are you doing?!” I turn to look behind me, Grian is rushing towards me, faster than I’ve ever seen him fly…like his life depended on it. I fall to my knees, sobbing racking through my body.
“I’m sorry Grian, I’m sorry…” I wail into his arms.
“Shhh, it’s okay love, it’s okay,” He runs a hand through my greasy hair that I had long given up on. “It’s all going to be okay,”
“I don’t wanna die Gri, I just felt so alone. I thought no one cared about me,”
“You’re not alone Scar, you will never be alone,”
“Why do you care so much–?”
“Because I love you, you idiot!” He yells loudly making me jump. “I..sorry I didn’t mean to yell. I..Scar, you’re my life, my rock. I don’t know what I’d do without you,”
“I love you too Grian,” Another sob racks through my body. I wrap my arms around him, we stay like that for a long time. Just Grian and I. Neither of us are perfect, neither of us are whole, maybe that’s why I’ve always been attracted to him like a magnet. By the time we began to move, the sun had already begun to rise. We move slowly to stand up, reveling in eachother’s warmth. Grian steps forward and that’s when the world cracks. The ground beneath me breaks.
Everything seems to move in slow motion. Grian screams rushing to grab my arm but it’s too late. I fall into the mouth of the void. Gods, my luck seems to be non-existent. I stare up as tears stream down Grian’s face. I hope he remembers me. I’m sorry Grian, I’m so very sorry.
GoodTimesWithScar Fell Out Of The World