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“You’re sure you’ve never played darts before?” The man asked, frowning angrily.
Whoops, time for Usopp to make his exit. He giggled, taking another swig of his beer.
“I swear, it’s all just beginner’s luck.” He swung his glass wildly, in proper drunken fashion, spreading beer everywhere and making the man jump out of the way to avoid it. “Oh god, I’m sorry, are you okay? I’m gonna go get you something to clean up!” He barely gave the man time to protest that he was fine, the beer didn’t touch him, then Usopp started into the crowd.
Now he just needed to disappear fast enough.
He didn’t have time to go far, though, before the man grabbed him by the shoulder.
“Hey man,” he said, falsely nice, “it’s okay, really, plus we’re not done with our game.” Usopp hesitated a second too long and the man kept going. “Come on, you gotta give me a chance to get my money back.”
The guy walked closer, forcing Usopp to back up into an empty table. This was bad.
The whole thing started a few months back, when the barman had served Usopp a few too many drinks and Usopp had lost track of how much his tab was. When he’d gone to Nami to borrow a few more bucks than his usual share, in order to pay for the drinks, she’d refused, telling him to find a solution by himself. When he’d whined, trying to make her change her mind, she’d pointed toward a game of darts in the corner of the bar and said “You’re a sniper. You can earn it.” Usopp had played with one guy, then two, then five. He’d beaten them all and gotten enough money not only to pay for his drinks but also to order a few more.
After that, it had become a routine whenever he needed cash. Usopp went to bars, got a beer or two, then pretended to be thoroughly smashed and challenged guys to games of darts. Seeing him as an easy target, they tended to bet way more than they should. And whenever they got mad about their loses, Usopp hightailed it out of there.
But this guy wasn’t letting him go that easily.
“Come with me, we need to talk.” He said, grabbing Usopp by the collar of his shirt.
Just at this instant, Usopp noticed Sanji in the crowd.
“Sanji! Babe!” He screamed, faking cheer, making the cook, and most of the crowd, turn to him.
Sanji stood up from his stool, came closer, frowning at the way the guy was holding Usopp. The guy flinched and let go. Usopp took the opportunity to run.
He threw himself in Sanji’s arms, uncoordinated and giggling.
“Babe, I’m playing darts and I’m winning! Isn’t it great? I had never played before, it’s really fun actually.” He sent Sanji a look, begging him to play along.
Sanji, the universe bless him, curled a hand around Usopp’s waist to help him stay upright.
“I see.” He said, biting his cigarette and giving the guy a nasty side eye. “Tell me, Darling, how many glasses did you have?”
Usopp hummed, messily counting on his fingers. “Something like… Three, or maybe four…” He giggled and stage-whispered. “Or maybe six…”
“Well, I think you’ve had enough, it’s time we go home.” He said, pulling Usopp toward the exit.
Usopp sent Sanji a look, biting his lip and saying: “Oh! That eager to get me into your bed? Well, race you home, then.” It was maybe a bit much, but it gave him an excuse as to why he was in such a hurry to get out of there.
“Wait!” The man grabbed Usopp’s arm again, but spoke to Sanji. “This little shit was ripping me off, no way am I letting him go that easily.”
Sanji glared at him outright this time. “First, you have no proof of any of that. And second, no one calls my man a ‘little shit’.”
Sanji kicked him, sending the guy flying hard enough that he hit the wall but didn’t damage it. Usopp breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t want to spend his hard earned money on the repairs.
He turned to Sanji and said, “let’s go,” pulling him out of the bar and into the street.
There, Usopp dropped the drunkard act, and Sanji let go of his waist, stepping a little further away.
“You okay?” He asked, concerned.
“Yeah!” Usopp replied, scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment. “Thanks for the rescue.”
“No problem,” Sanji lit up another cigarette, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”
They walked all the way down to the harbor in silence before Sanji started up the conversation again.
“So you’re cheating at darts?”
“Not at all. I’m winning fair and square.” Usopp boasted. “It’s not my fault those guys can’t take a loss.”
“So you play drunkard to…?”
“It makes them lower their guard at first, bet more money.” Usopp smirked. Nothing made him feel like a real pirate the way tricking idiots who underestimated him did. “And when they start getting suspicious, it helps me sneak out.”
Sanji nodded, pensive. “And do they get aggressive like that often?”
Usopp shrugged. “Depends. I usually get away before that. I didn’t see this one coming, is all.”
Sanji hummed nonsensically. And that was it for the night.
It was only after that night that things started evolving.
Usopp didn’t notice at first, but Sanji always seemed to show up at the exact same bar where Usopp was. And whenever Usopp did his little drunkard dart player act, Sanji steered closer, like he was waiting for something.
It was convenient, though. Whenever Usopp wanted to get away, he just called Sanji out, and Sanji came, ready to scare anyone away. So Usopp didn’t really mind at first.
That is, until one night, when Sanji’s behavior became… invasive.
Usopp had been doing his usual number. He had noticed a guy at the bar who looked like he was ready to get wasted and spend some money. So Usopp had attracted his attention, pretending to be like him, and taking him to the dart throwing area.
The guy had then proceeded to buy Usopp drink after drink. Some people did that, thinking it would lower Usopp’s abilities. Jokes on them, Usopp and Franky had tried it out and turned out Usopp was an even better shot drunk.
So Usopp had been steadily taking all of his money, and the guy wasn’t even mad. He cheered every time Usopp won, complimenting him and offering to buy him yet another drink. At some point, he started drunkenly getting into Usopp’s space, as if he had trouble hearing him and needed to be closer.
Usopp played along, knowing full well that this guy still had money to spend. He was too relaxed. People who tried to pretend they weren’t getting to the bottom of their pockets tensed minutely with every one of Usopp’s wins. This guy’s money definitely wasn’t clean, too much money for such common clothes, but it was fine because he had a lot to spare.
All of a sudden, Usopp felt a hand around his waist. He did his best not to react, convinced the guy had reached the ‘touchy’ level of drunkenness. Usopp let out a surprised yelp when instead of being pulled toward the guy, he was pulled away.
“Hey Darling, I’ve been looking all over for you. Is that guy bothering you?” Sanji’s voice sounded near Usopp’s cheek, as the man dropped a kiss there.
The guy Usopp had been playing with took a step back, his eyes bulging open and his hands coming up in a defensive motion.
“Oh! Oh, you got a boyfriend… I… hum… Sorry, I didn’t mean to…”
Usopp turned toward the blond, keeping his voice sweet. “Babe. What are you doing here?” With his eyes, though, he threw Sanji a major ‘What the fuck are you doing?’.
“Well, I saw this guy hitting on you and…”
The guy panicked. He grabbed the money Usopp and him had been betting and he put it forcibly in Usopp’s hand. “You know what, I better go, leave you two alone.” When Usopp opened his mouth, he continued: “No no, keep it. We both know you would have won it anyway.”
Usopp was flabbergasted. The guy knew Usopp was ripping him off? Then why did he keep playing?
The guy ran out of the bar faster than Usopp himself could have. As soon as he was out, Sanji took a step back, releasing Usopp’s waist. Usopp turned to him, glaring.
“What was that?”
Sanji shrugged, not looking at him. “He was hitting on you. I thought you might need help.”
Had the guy been hitting on him? Usopp hadn’t noticed. Was that why he’d kept playing? To spend more time with Usopp?
Usopp rolled his eyes. “So what if he was? I was making good money off of him. And he was being respectful.”
Sanji tried to take a drag of his cigarette, before noticing he didn’t have one. He gestured for Usopp to follow him and they left so bar so Sanji could light one up.
“So?” Usopp demanded, his arms crossed over his chest in clear annoyance. “Why the fuck did you think it was a good idea to make me lose a perfectly good money-making opportunity?”
Sanji blew some smoke, still hiding behind his fringe. “I told you. He was hitting on you. You usually use me to play your boyfriend and get rid of them when that happens.”
Usopp felt himself tense, his anger rising. “First, I can deal with them myself, I just use you because it’s convenient. Second, I am perfectly capable of choosing when I want to extract myself from a situation. What you did was taking matters into your own hands and disrespecting my ability to choose.”
“I’m sorry, I just wanted to help.” The cook huffed, as if he had a right to be annoyed at all.
“Yeah well, I am not a child who needs a knight in shining armor to protect him.” Usopp turned away, storming off. He needed to be far away from Sanji. How dare he…
“No, you’re more of a princess.” Sanji whispered under his breath.
Usopp felt the anger rise in his blood once again. What was that supposed to mean? Fuck him. Honestly, fuck him.
Usopp decided not to dignify him with an answer and left.
Not wanting to be found, Usopp decided that returning to the Sunny was a bad idea. Instead, he wandered into another part of town, the richer part. Usopp didn’t usually go there for his scheme. People there were much more careful with their money, and usually had bodyguards or security to take care of anyone trying to rip them off. Usopp had tried once or twice but honestly, it wasn’t worth the effort.
Tonight, though, Usopp didn’t care. He was too annoyed to try and rob someone else, he just wanted a drink. Preferably a fancy drink. In a fancy, comfortable place.
He found Nami at a high end bar. She was negotiating cocktail prices with the bartender, who kept repeating that they couldn’t accept her offer and needed their manager’s opinion. Usopp sat down next to her, sighing.
“Go get your manager, then.” She said, waving them off and turning to Usopp, concern in her eyes.
The bartender, too relieved to be able to leave, forgot to make her actually pay for her drink.
She took a sip. “You’ve got your grumpy face on, that’s rare. What happened?”
Usopp sighed. “Sanji was an ass.” She lifted an eyebrow. “I think…? Maybe? I’m not sure.”
Nami hummed. “Okay. How about you tell me what he did, and I’ll tell you if he was an ass or not.”
Usopp explained everything. The way Sanji had been acting as his boyfriend lately, to help Usopp get out of situations, to the way he’d acted tonight.
All of a sudden, Nami interrupted him. “Wait? He made you lose money?”
“Well, I didn’t have it yet but I’m pretty sure I could have gotten it, so…”
“Forget it.” She cut, putting her drink down irritably. “He was absolutely an ass and I would have kicked him in the nuts and forced him to pay me the money he stopped me from earning.”
Usopp grimaced. Even if he was mad at Sanji, he didn’t feel like hurting him. He just wanted Sanji to respect him, that was all.
Nami hailed the bartender for another drink, ordering one for Usopp as well. The bartender looked even more scared than before. The talk with their manager must have been pretty rough. This time, they didn’t even ask for payment at all.
Halfway through her next glass, which she had pensively drank until then, Nami said:
“Now that I think about it, though… Sanji hasn’t done that before, right? Interrupting your scheme, I mean.”
“No, it’s the first time. I really didn’t expect it.”
“And, it’s not the first time he’s around during them… Just last week, this guy almost hit you and he didn’t even intervene until after you called to him…”
Usopp remembered the incident. He’d been playing with a woman, that time. She was young and clearly blowing off her first paycheck. Usopp had been focused on her, on her big grin and easygoing nature, on the way she didn’t really mind the loses. That’s why he hadn’t noticed the guy who had come running at him. The guy had grabbed him by the collar and threatened him, accusing him of corrupting his daughter or something and demanding he gave back the money he took from her. The daughter, who turned out to be the woman he was playing with, had loudly complained, asking her dad to leave Usopp alone, but of course that wasn’t enough for him. Usopp had gestured for Sanji to intervene and Sanji had kicked the man away from Usopp. The guy, too afraid of Sanji to do more, had let them go.
But Nami was right. The guy had been very threatening towards Usopp and Sanji hadn’t moved until after Usopp had called for help.
“So why would he not intervene then, when there was actual danger, and do it now when nothing was wrong?”
“He said he did it because the guy was flirting with me.” Usopp huffed, gesturing animatedly to illustrate his point. “Which, I hadn’t noticed, but what if he was?”
Nami lifted an eyebrow, taking a sip of her drink, fixing Usopp with a blank stare. “What if he was indeed.” Usopp shivered at the ominousness.
“I mean, I wasn’t going to go home with him, but you and I both know men are easier to trick when they think you like them back.” Usopp tried to explain himself, feeling like he had said something very wrong but unsure how to resolve the situation.
Nami used her straw to twirl the ice around in her drink. “So you were flirting back?”
“I don’t know, I didn’t even notice he was flirting.”
“What about Sanji? Did he think you were flirting back?”
“I…” Usopp froze. He didn’t know. Did Sanji think Usopp was flirting back? Was it important? “What if he did?” He asked Nami, unsure of what it all meant.
“What if he did.” Nami repeated, her voice cutting like a threat.
She wanted him to use his brain and she was losing patience. Usopp felt himself begin to sweat.
Usopp took a sip of his own drink to earn himself a few precious seconds.
Sanji had intervened tonight saying it was because the guy had been flirting with Usopp. According to Nami, he may have thought that Usopp was flirting back. Was Sanji… bothered… by the fact that Usopp may have flirted with the guy? Was it what he’d tried to stop? Why would he care if Usopp was flirting with some random guy in a bar?
Suddenly, it hit him. What Nami may have been insinuating. But surely, she didn’t really think…
“Nami, this is insane.”
She lifted an eyebrow, the corner of her lips stretching into a pleased smirk. He’d reached the right conclusion.
“Is it, though? Cause he’s been different ever since you first called him your boyfriend.”
Usopp blushed furiously at the implication. “It was just make-believe! It didn’t mean anything!”
“Maybe it didn’t but it sure opened his eyes.”
“Nami, that’s not…”
“He’s been paying more attention to you, lately. Haven’t you noticed the way he keeps making your favorites?”
Usopp rolled his eyes. “Nami, he makes everyone their favorites all the time, this doesn’t prove anything.”
“Not for a week in a row.”
Okay, so maybe Sanji had been privileging Usopp a little. That still didn’t prove anything.
Nami didn’t let him protest anymore though. “To me, the most incriminating is the way he keeps following you on shore leaves. Going to drink in the same bars, staring at you, waiting to see if you’re gonna play darts with someone.” She looked Usopp in the eyes. “Waiting for you to hail him over, to call him your boyfriend and get handsy with him and let him act possessive.”
“He’s not doing that…” Usopp replied, his words slow. Nami’s argument was shaking something in Usopp. He had noticed Sanji’s behavior. He had thought it was strange. He just hadn’t reach the conclusion that Nami insisted was the right one.
“Isn’t that exactly what he did tonight?” Nami asked, making Usopp’s convictions explode like a glass falling to the floor.
She was right. Sanji had acted like a jealous boyfriend. He’d noticed someone hitting on Usopp and had intervened to stop it before anything else happened.
Usopp bit his lip. Sanji liked Usopp. And Usopp had no idea what to do about it.
Nami, seeing the way he’d fallen into a deeply pensive state, smiled and went back to slurping her cocktail. Her job here was done.
It took Usopp a little while to truly come to terms with the realization that Sanji might actually like him. That process was made even worse by the fact that Sanji’s attitude towards him had become very ambivalent, ever since Usopp had called him out on his behavior.
Now the cook alternated between being overly attentive to Usopp and stubbornly refusing to treat him differently from the rest of the crew. This led to weird situations, like when he saw Usopp tripping, and almost ran over to catch him, only to stop himself, let Usopp fall on his face, and then pretend he hadn’t seen anything, not even helping him up.
Before the self-doubts could fully settle in, though, Nami snorted, calling Sanji an idiot and promising Usopp that he was just being shy.
This situation gave Usopp time to reflect, though. To think on his feelings for Sanji, and on how he’d feel if Sanji decided to make a move towards him. He found he didn’t dislike the idea.
He had never thought about it before because why would a man like Sanji (beautiful, talented, strong, courageous, etc.) want anything to do with Usopp?
But now that he was thinking about it… He would love for Sanji’s protectiveness and the tenderness of his touch to be real, not just a way to trick strangers. He would love to be able to call Sanji ‘Babe’ and truly mean it. He would love to have Sanji’s undivided attention, instead of the make-believe during which most of his focus was on the guy threatening Usopp.
So Usopp made a decision. A terrifying decision. He was going to ask Sanji out.
But in order to do that, he would need to talk to Sanji. And Sanji had been avoiding him all day. First this morning, when Usopp had tried to get his attention and Sanji had waved him off because he was too busy fighting with Zoro instead. Then, he’d gone to see Sanji while he was alone in the kitchen in the afternoon and was shooed out, being told that he couldn’t see what Sanji was cooking, that it was a surprise. The third time, he saw Sanji struggling to carry furniture to install in the crow’s nest, and, when he tried to help, Sanji refused, saying he needed to do it by himself.
At the end of the day, Usopp was properly bummed out, ready to give up and try again the next day. Until Sanji came to him, blushing and stammering:
“Hey Usopp, hum… I have a surprise for you.”
Usopp blinked, curious. A surprise?
“Please follow me.”
Sanji led Usopp up to the crow’s nest, in which Usopp found a small table, with two chairs facing each other, wine glasses and covered plates, candles lit everywhere in the room to provide just enough light to see. Usopp recognized all the things Sanji had brought up earlier in the day.
“Is this… Is this for me?” Usopp asked, a little unsure of what it all meant.
“I… Yes…” Sanji played with his fingers, a nervous habit he had when he didn’t have a cigarette to play with instead. “You see, I’ve been wanting to talk to you… Care to sit with me?”
Usopp nodded, letting Sanji lead him by the hand and pull his chair for him.
“Is that why you fought with Zoro earlier?” Usopp asked, remembering how important the fight had seemed for Sanji.
“Yes, I needed him to stay out of here to prepare all this. Of course, he was annoying, insisting that his stupid workout routine couldn’t be done on the deck.” Sanji huffed, procuring a bottle of wine to serve them both a glass.
Then, Sanji launched himself into an explanation concerning the wine that Usopp only half listened to. He trusted Sanji, whatever it was he was serving him was surely delicious. Instead, Usopp took in the atmosphere. It look so soft, so cozy, so… so romantic, he realized.
This was the perfect situation to ask Sanji out.
Usopp took in a fortifying breath. This was terrifying. But he needed to do it. He owed it to himself. And he needed to do it fast before he lost his nerves.
“Sanji, please, go out with me!” Usopp blurted out, his eyes resolutely closed to avoid Sanji’s gaze.
Something hit the ground and Sanji swore. Usopp kept his eyes closed. Sanji’s lack of response was making him anxious. He shouldn’t have said that, he should have kept his mouth shut, he should have…
“Usopp?” Sanji asked, his voice incredulous but not angry.
Usopp opened one eye, wary but wanting to check Sanji’s expression. The cook wasn’t angry, he was… blushing, and opening and closing his mouth repeatedly.
Was that a good or a bad thing?
“Please say something…” Usopp begged.
“I…” Sanji sat down on his own chair, holding his face in his hands. “I don’t know if I should be ecstatic or mad at you.” He said, making Usopp flinch.
“I’m sorry, I mean, I take it back, just forget I said anything.”
Sanji shook his head. “Ecstatic it is, I guess.” He smiled at Usopp. “You beat me to it you idiot.”
“I… What?”
“Why did you think I prepared a whole romantic dinner for us? I had a whole speech planned too!”
“A speech? A speech for what?”
“A speech to ask you out, idiot.” Sanji rolled his eyes, the fondness clear in the upturn of his lips.
Usopp took in the atmosphere of the room again. Oh! Sanji had planned all that. He’d prepared the room, arranged the candles, chosen the wine. He’d had a whole plan. Of course the atmosphere was perfect to ask someone out, Sanji had made it that way.
“You wanted to ask me out…” Usopp realized out loud, feeling the words in his own mouth and blushing intensely as he did so. Somehow, this was making him feel all mushy inside in a way that the idea of asking Sanji out himself hadn’t.
“Technically, I wanted to confess, then ask you out. Look Usopp, I’m sorry about the other day. You were right, you had this and this guy wasn’t even being a threat, I was just… I acted like a jealous asshole. And it was very unfair to you.”
Usopp lifted an eyebrow. “Is that your confession speech? Cause it sounds more like an apology.”
“That’s because it is. You see, realizing how jealous I was of this guy made me realize that, well, I have feelings for you. And I wish I could be a little jealous with you. I’m sorry, that sounds very selfish. I just want to be your boyfriend, and to know that, even though you’re flirting with someone else, you’re going home with me, and that I don’t have to worry about someone else… I don’t know, about you liking someone else more? Sorry, I’m a mess, I swear this isn’t the speech I had planned.” Sanji hid his face in his hands, blushing all the way to his ears.
Usopp smiled, his heart warming. It wasn’t the best of speeches, and it was a bit possessive, but it was true, and obviously came from the heart. It was clear Sanji liked him very much, definitely a lot more than Usopp liked him. But that was okay. Usopp didn’t mind. Or rather, he was convinced that his own feelings would catch up to Sanji’s soon enough.
Usopp took Sanji’s hand in his, pulling it away from the cook’s face and caressing it. “How about you give me the speech you had planned?”
Sanji stumbled on his words, blushing even harder, but he swallowed hard and started. “Usopp, you’re the most beautiful and intelligent man I know, you impress me every single day. And if you’d allow me, I’d like to be the one to take care of you and provide for you. I’ll protect you from all the dangers of this world, and then bring you home to cook you the best of meals. I love you… Please go out with me.”
Usopp’s cheeks were starting to hurt from all the smiling. “Yes, I’ll go out with you, Sanji!”
Sanji almost jumped off of his seat in excitement, only held down by the way Usopp was still holding his hand. “Really? You really want to?”
Usopp lifted his chin proudly. “Didn’t I ask you out first?”
“You did.” Sanji smiled fondly.
They ate the dinner Sanji had prepared, holding hands the whole time, Sanji making heart eyes at Usopp whenever he thought Usopp wasn’t looking. Usopp was really happy to be there. He didn’t know where their relationship would lead them but he couldn’t wait to find out.