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Clark saw that Dick’s leg was bouncing as he entered the room. Dick had texted him that they needed to talk, but Clark had no idea what it could be about. He hadn’t been aware of any issues between them. But Dick was clearly nervous so there must be something going on. He hoped it was something that could easily be resolved with a conversation and that whatever it was wouldn’t hurt their friendship. The only thing he could think of that had changed recently was Clark getting married to Bruce, but that had happened a couple months ago. Surely if that was the issue, it would have come up before now.
“Hello, Dick. What’s going on?” Clark asked.
Dick looked up, just noticing his presence. Huh. He was usually more observant than that, even with Clark’s unusually light footsteps. “Oh, hey Clark.” He straightened up and turned to face Clark who sat down on the couch next to the armchair Dick was sitting in. “I know we probably should have had this conversation before you and Bruce got married, but…What does your being married to Bruce mean for our relationship? I mean you’re only like eight years older than me so, even if I did think of Bruce as my father, I definitely don’t think of you that way. But he is family, which makes you family so what does that mean for us?”
Clark smiled in a way that hopefully came off as comforting, but not patronizing. “It doesn’t have to change anything if you don’t want it to. We were friends before Bruce and I even started dating. This doesn’t have to change that relationship. It just means we might see each other more often. If saying we’re friends doesn’t feel like enough, we can just say we’re family and leave it at that.”
Dick sighed. “I know. I guess it’s not really about my relationship to you. It’s more about my relationship with Bruce and the rest of the family. To be honest, I think I feel…kind of replaced. Not that I’ve ever had romantic feelings for Bruce, but I just don’t know what my place is in this family anymore. I would talk to Bruce, but…you know how he gets sometimes. I don’t want to get yelled at for trying to be honest because he thought I was saying something I wasn’t.”
He had a point that Bruce had a tendency to take the worst possible interpretation of what people said to him, especially with Dick. Everyone being busy with the wedding and catching up afterwards probably didn’t help, since they weren’t seeing each other as often. Clark made a mental note to remind the rest of the family to show their appreciation for each other (and especially Dick) more often. They sometimes had a tendency to take each other for granted. “You’ll always be welcome in this family, Dick. Nothing could ever change that. And no one could ever replace you.”
“I know I’m welcome here. It’s just that it seems like you can do everything I can do, except better. The kids don’t come to me anymore when they need something Bruce can't (or won’t) give them. Bruce doesn’t come to me anymore, either. But they do come to you. It’s like they don’t need me anymore, but not because they grew up, but because there’s someone else they trust more now. Like…like maybe I’m not good enough when they have you.” Dick seemed to be missing his usual confidence. This was clearly really bothering him.
Clark chose his words carefully. He didn’t want to accidentally make Dick feel worse about himself than he already did. He knew how much Dick struggled with self esteem, despite his outward confidence. “I can see how you might feel that way and I’m sorry Bruce and I never had this conversation with you earlier. Dick, you never should have been shouldering so much responsibility for the kids or for Bruce’s emotions. We thought it would help you if I did that instead. I guess it never occurred to us that you would be hurt by that.”
Dick stood up and started pacing. “How could you not see that? It feels like my relationships with everyone in this family have been slowly taken over by you. The kids were happy…they are happy so I didn’t want to mess something up that’s working. You’re more easily available more of the time. I get it. I just don’t know what the point of me being part of this family is if it’s not taking care of them.”
Clark really should have seen this coming. He’d watched Bruce’s family grow and knew how important it was to Dick to be able to take care of the people he loved, especially his younger siblings. He and Dick were similar in that way so Clark could see how he might feel lost without that as the basis of his relationships. He just wished they could have had this conversation sooner.
“We absolutely should have talked to you when things started changing. I still think that change is a good thing, though. Not just for the kids, but for you, too. You were basically acting as another parent. You don’t have to do that anymore. You can be in their lives and love them without having to take care of them all the time. You can just be their older brother instead of their parent.”
Dick took a drink of his coffee and sat down next to Clark on the couch, staring at the mug once he set it down. “It’s been that way for so long. I don’t know how to just be an older brother. I tried with Jason before he died, but…you know how that ended. Not that I was very good at it before he died, anyway. All of you have this new life together that I only exist on the periphery of.”
He wished he had more experience with being an older sibling, but he figured it was like any relationship and needed to look different depending on the person. He did have experience with having a family and leaving them, though. Clark remembered moving to Metropolis for the first time for college and how distant he felt from his family and friends in Smallville. “You have your own life separate from your family, which is totally normal for an adult. Most people eventually grow up and leave their childhood homes and families behind. It’s hard to adjust to any major change so I understand why this is hard for you, but you just need to give it time, You’ll figure it out. You’re a different person than you were with Jason. You have a chance to get it right this time.”
Dick leaned back, fidgeting with a pen in his hand. Thankfully, he was just rocking it back and forth between his fingers and not clicking it. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe my relationship with them needs to change. I’m not sure that older brother is the best fit for what it should change to, though. I’m just so much older and they’re not used to treating me like a brother, either. Maybe it would be better to think of it more like I’m an uncle or a godfather or something. So I’m still an adult in their lives that can take care of them, but I’m not their parent. I might have been too young when that started, but I’m an adult now. We can’t change the past, but I don’t think we should ignore it.”
“Hmm…I could see how something like that could work. We could even make you their official godfather so if something happens to us, you’ll have an easier time getting set up as their guardian. If Bruce hasn’t done that already. I’ll have to talk to Bruce about it, but I don’t see any reason for him to have a problem with that. I suppose that fits better with the relationship you have with Bruce and I, anyway.”
Dick nodded. “Okay. I still don’t feel like I see them often enough, though. And I want to be involved or at least consulted when you’re making big decisions about their lives or something major happens.”
“I’m sure we can figure something out. Maybe we could even have one or two of them spend the night with you in Bludhaven and help you patrol. With me in Gotham so much, we probably don’t need everyone here every night. You could also just visit more often, you know.”
Dick rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Everyone’s just so busy.”
“We also didn’t realize this was bothering you so much. We can talk with everyone about figuring out some kind of schedule both for you visiting us and us visiting you. You’re important to all of us. We’ll make time. And Bruce and I will talk to you if anything major happens with the kids, if possible. Sometimes decisions have to be made so quickly we won’t have time for that, but we’ll keep you in the loop as much as we can.”
Dick let out a breath and dropped his shoulders. “Okay. That’s all I’m asking. I will have to clean my apartment before anyone can visit, though. Thanks, Clark.”
“Of course. Thank you for being honest with me. Just don’t wait so long to talk the next time there’s a problem.”
Dick leaned over and hugged Clark, who returned it just as tightly.