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It was a spooky Hallows Eve in all Teyvat.
Not a bump through the night.
[Reader] was not ready for the fright of their life.
"Mustard we're out of candy-"
"No, I'm not stealing it from a kid."
The dendro slime bounced up and down on the laminated floors as if explaining to [Reader] why the kid didn't need the candy.
[Reader] was living in a low income apartment in Teyvat. They had moved here after a change in jobs with better pay.
It wasn't easy working for the Hili-Mart down the street but the manager was nice at least.
The current candy situation arose when-
[Reader]
Insert cough sfx here- a certain slime ate all the candy that they had set for Halloween.
Mustard hopped up and down explaining their idea looking like a very proud slime.
"So let me get this right... we go trick or treating and just sort the candy we don't like and use that?" [Reader] paused for a bit before picking up the slime and squeezing their companion in a hug.
"This is why you carry the brain cell for both of us-"
Mustard gave them a haughty look as if saying "I know I do."
But there was a problem...
What were they going to dress up as?
"You wearing a carrot on your head does not make you a cannibal."
Mustard gave them a look while eyeing them head to toe.
[Reader] was in a brown shirt and pants with a few leaves taped to their face.
"What?"
"I'm a tree."
If Mustard had hands the facepalm would match the look of exasperation. It rolled it's eyes and motioned [Reader] to pick up the grocery bag they planned to use for candy.
The two set off on their journey around the neighborhood.
"Aren't you too old to be trick or treating?"
"Aren't you too judgmental." [Reader] had knocked on the door only for it to open to a blue-haired pirate.
He gave them a playful smirk and looked them up and down. "You sound like you need a drink~...And maybe a new pair of shoes."
[Reader] raised an eyebrow looking down at their shoes. They knew that the shoes looked a bit worn but it wasn't that bad.
Mustard looked up at them absolutely amused.
Needless to say, they didn't get candy.
"You're giving out booze-"
Both [Reader] and Mustard were bewildered by the short man with braids in a skimpy white outfit.
They weren't sure if he was wearing the half-assed sheet or if the sheet was wearing him.
"Ehe~ If its a day to celebrate, then it's a day to drink!"
He was definitely already drunk.
"Grape Juice? Really?"
The red-haired man that answered the door wasn't even in a full batman costume.
He was only wearing the mask.
He just stood there silently and crossed his arms. "I can take it back."
[Reader] groaned picking up Mustard and putting their companion on their head.
Both of the candy searching pair deadpanned.
At least the last house gave them something to drown their misery in.
"My, my, aren't you a cute tree~"
The purple witch who answered the door was grinning at the two of them.
She then spotted the slime on their head, continuing to smile.
"And are you a rabbit?"
[Reader] : 1
Mustard : 0
At least she gave candy.
[Reader] snickered as the slime sulked for the rest of the walk to the next house.
"Look! Look! Big Brother Albedo! There's a slime!"
A little red witch bounced up and down with a bowl of candy in her hands.
A man walked up in a lab coat who [Reader] could only assume was Albedo, quickly picking the little witch up. "Careful Klee, slimes are known to be hostile."
The little red witch named Klee pouted.
[Reader] awkwardly laughed and gave her a gentle smile. Taking the equally as happy slime off their head and holding Mustard in their arms.
"Its okay, Mustard is a gentle slime. No hitting or biting. I swear."
Albedo hesitated, looking at Klee who already had sparkles in her eyes and sighing, giving her a nod of approval.
The girl light up immediately reaching out ruffle the slimes leaves and pat its head. Mustard was more than happy to receive the affection.
They left that house with candy and smiles.
Also a weird rabbit looking device...
This exchange was weird.
He was just silent.
Observing them...
"So can we get candy or?..." [Reader] and Mustard were confused by the short green-haired man.
'Maybe we should leave...'
He walked into his home and silently came back with a flashlight in hand, dropping it in their bag. "Adult or not, without sight you are weak."
The two standing at the door sweat-dropped.
'Its not even that dark out...'
They weren't getting very far in their candy endeavors.
"I am the great Archaic Lord of Lightning and Blitz! Fear my master speed technique!"
[Reader] sweat-dropped at the old man who had his knee and hand raised in some sort of fighting stance.
"If your speed matches your intellect then there isn't much-"
[Reader] got a shoe to the face before they could finish talking. The old-man muttering about the newer generations and their lack of respect before slamming the door.
Mustard was snickering as the shoe fell into their bag.
'Crazy ass people in this neighborhood...'
"Candy rots teeth as it sweetens though not poisonous to the core, overtime it-"
Mustard was practically falling asleep and [Reader] couldn't agree more.
The man in this house had apparently forgotten to buy candy and instead offered words of advice deemed "equally as valuable" as he put it.
He was a tall gentleman in a brown suit. If it wasn't for his good looks they would have left already.
The man was using candy as metaphors for life.
Yeah.
[Reader] was done here.
"What was Qiqi supposed to do here again?..." The little purple haired girl dressed as a zombie looked confused as she opened the door for them.
Then a green haired man in a doctor's costume approached with a bowl of candy. "Its alright. I'll take care of this." He patted her head and dropped candy in [Reader's] bag.
"If you're a doctor then why are you giving away candy?..."
He just smiled.
Mustard looked at [Reader] like they were stupid and just nudged them away as if telling them to just accept the candy.
"Ah! You dropped this..." A blue-haired lady wearing devil horns came up to [Reader] holding one of the leaves with tape on it.
"Oh... thank you." [Reader] paused a bit as they felt a bit of warmth brush their cheeks. Their eyes widened as they realized she was putting the leaf back on their face for them.
She smiled and walked away.
Mustard was looking over with a sly expression.
"She's just a nice stranger Mustard..."
[Reader] was sitting on the curb counting the candy in their bag and sweat-dropping.
Mustard looked as equally as disappointed.
There was barely any candy in the bag, they counted up to twenty pieces at most. Minus the one they just unwrapped and gave to Mustard.
The two looked at each other as if having the same idea.
"So...plan A?"
Mustard hopped around excitedly.
They both decided to go ahead with the first plan.
[Reader] ran.
Mustard hitching a ride in their arms.
A kid wailing far behind them.
The boy was always feeding the birds that shit on everyone's cars.
It was fair game.
"HAPPY HALLOWEEN!"
[Reader] and Mustard ran off with Timmie's candy bag in hand.
The End