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He is among his family, under the plum blossoms on a warm day.
Cheong Mun, Cheong Jin and Tang Bo are by his side.
He missed them too much.
"Oh, sahyeong, you should see these children!" he begins, holding up a jug of wine and gesturing widely with his hands. "They're so stupid, so naughty and ungrateful!" this will be the first thing he tells anyone willing to listen to his complaints; Cheong Jin snorts to his right, and sahyeong smiles.
"Tell us about them", Tang Bo asks, more relaxed than he remembers him; Cheong Myeong was afraid he'd forgotten about it.
"Oh, just a minute..." he remembers the faces of all his brats. Some of it makes him smile, and some of it makes him roll his eyes or wrinkle his face. "Oh, sahyeong, some of them you'd like... for example, Yun Jong, the adorable kid with the patience of a saint; he has the kind of face you want to trust, and can harass the entire third generation with one look. He's a good senior, considering how long he's been trying to subdue me, ha", he laughs, "a cute kid, in a word".
(Yun Jong shouts for them to hurry, get out of his way, they need a doctor, here and now; he feels a chilling fear, his palms are cold, sweaty and trembling; Jo Geol looks at him, grasps his sleeve as if they're children again, and he's the older of the two of them, and he doesn't know how to comfort him.)
"Then, in order, since we're going along the third generation, there's Jo Geol", and here he takes a big gulp from the jug that never empties, always filling up with wine, "a boy that doesn't know where and when to shut his mouth! Sahyeong, if I took him for even half the deals, we'd end up in wars!" Tang Bo laughs beside him, and he kicks the brat in the shin. "Nothing funny about that! If it wasn't for Yun Jong, we would have had to cut off his tongue at some point, it was unbearable", Cheong Jin throws him an inexpressive look, and Cheong Myeong shows him his tongue like a grown man. He sighs. "But Jo Geol is strong; I'd even say he's second to me in the third generation, though rather, he is the strongest for their generation. I wasn't too keen on joining their generation", he mutters, still resentful that his first plan was shattered by the sect leader's benevolence.
"I see, Myeong-a, that kid is very interesting", his sahyeong smiles, and Cheon-myung sees the gloating in it; ah, his sahyeong doesn't change.
"Jo Geol may be strong, but he's still an idiot", Cheong Myeong concludes with a kindness in his voice that's hard for the rest of us to miss.
(There's blood on his hands, so much of it, and it won't stop no matter how much he presses; Jo Geol can't feel anyone else's breath, can't feel anyone else's heartbeat; he's scared, he's scared in a way he hasn't been in all these years, all these battles; his junior's face shouldn't be so still and peaceful).
"If we really talk about interesting kids, there's Yu Iseol", and Cheong Myeong feels a mixed feeling of pride and fatigue, "that girl really wanted to give me a heart attack by sneaking up on me", he puts his hand to his chest and chuckles erupt around him; he's surrounded by traitors; he missed them.
"Hyeong, are you sure she's not yours?" asks Tang Bo to him, and Cheong Myeong throws a jug at him, immediately picking up a new one even though the brat dodges. "I'm just asking, dao-hyeong! I wouldn't judge!"
Did he say he missed the brat? Forget what he said.
"She's not mine", Cheong Myeong repeats; he'd know if he had kids so he could have a great-granddaughter like Yoo Isol.
"Tell me about her", the branch of the sahyeong world offers, and he accepts the invitation.
"She's creepy and quiet, like a ghost", he begins because that would really be the first thing he'd think of, and then: "she's beautiful. Very beautiful, and she never notices the way those bastards look at her. If it wasn't for her generation, and then Soso, I'd worry about her even more", he sighs, like a burdened father with a very beautiful daughter. "But she's strong. I think she's second in strength and pure skill in the sect after me. She's a good child".
"Now I think she's yours too", Cheong Jin inserts, and Cheong Myeong desperately wants to kick him in the side too, but sahyeong puts her hands, on his.
"Myeong-a, we won't judge you for having a child on the side", his sahyeong pronounces, and Cheong Myeong gasps with indignation.
Traitors; he's surrounded by traitors.
(Please, — she thinks and stumbles as she runs, runs and runs, — please be okay, please, please, please, please... — she looks for them, she has a bad feeling; the same as the day her father left her; the same as if she is late and can never go back to the old world again; she finds them and they are crying; she is late).
"There's also Dongryong", and here it takes a pause for him to get his mind off these jokers, "he's a silly kid too, like the rest of them. Wants to take on a lot of things, though he's not ready yet", he takes a sip of wine and looks at the plum petals moving above them from the slight breeze, "but he'll be ready", Cheong Myeong says quietly, and there's more truth to it than before, "he'll be a worthy sect leader one day".
"High praise from you", his sahyeong smiles at him as he looks at them again; his sahyeong is as young as he was in the days before he became the sect leader. It's the soft face he grew up with.
Cheong Myeong smiles back.
"Just don't tell Dongryong about this or his head will swell", he laughs, imagining it.
("You can't!—" he gasps, he can't believe what he's seeing, because it can't be true, because the world isn't set up for Cheong Myeong, their commander, their personal devil, their mad dog, their junior, to die before them. "Open your eyes, you bastard!" he shouts, and his voice shakes, his vision blurred with tears, his hands clutching the black bloodstained clothes on his motionless chest. "Please... Cheong Myeong, please—")
"Hyeong-nim, but tell me about the Tang children", Tang Bo asks him again, leaning over to him, his green eyes burning with genuine curiosity and impatience, and Cheong Myeong can barely contain his tenderness.
"Oh, you'd like Soso", he laughs, "she could put anyone in a hospital bed, even me!"
"Good girl", Tang Bo loves her, and Cheong Myeong doesn't even find the strength to hit him as he's so right.
"There's also Tang Gunak, an equally contented pleasant child..."
(This isn't someone who can die, no; they refuse to believe it; Cheong Myeong is a man of miracles, if there's anyone who could cheat death, it's him; it's hard not to think of another when their treatment doesn't work).
He talks about the elders, about the Hyeon generation: how Hyeon Jong is a gentle but steadfast leader, how Hyeon Yeong is a little crazy but an absolutely hilarious kid, and how Hyeon Sang has to stand between the two without going crazy or letting the two get in the way, which Cheong Myeong truly admires, because he would have nailed one of them a long time ago.
(It's like a bad dream; Hyeon Jong feels his knees buckling, and oddly enough, the only thing keeping him from falling is Hyeon Yeong's grip on his forearm while Hyeon Sang stands, frozen).
He talks about the children of the second and third generation, they are not so special compared to the Five Swords, but they are still his children.
(It's not true, they don't believe it; how can it be true if they're all safe and sound?)
He talks about the Un generation, only two people, but still loyal to Huashan to the core.
(Un Am and Un Geom look at the blooming plum trees in mid-winter, left to take care of the sect; somehow this blooming doesn't seem like a good omen to them.)
He talks about a Shaolin monk: a stubborn but good-natured kid, and very, very stupid if you ask him.
(He recites sutras, and they're long and long, and he may get yelled at for not doing so, but he knows better than to comfort himself with lies; Cheong Myeong deserves a rest, so he keeps praying for him, even if they try to beat him up.)
He talks about Baek Ah, the best marten in the world, the best spirit animal in history.
(She knows this before people do; she hears echoes of her man's voice telling about all of them; she hears happiness, pride, and peace in him.)
He talks about the child from Junnan, the little prince of the North Sea, their allies, even those bandits and sapa.
"Don't you think it'll be hard for them without you?" asks his Cheong Jin from his youth, without wrinkles or gray hair.
Cheong Myeong pauses for a second, thinking; his own clothes have gone from black to white at some point.
"They'll grieve", because he's not blind, he knows he's dear for some reason to all those stupid kids, "but the older ones always leave before the younger ones, and they're strong, they'll get through it", he concludes with a shrug, and Cheong Jin shakes his head like he said something incomprehensible. Asshole.
(It's a victory defined by just one blood, just one sacrifice, but it feels like a loss in the whole war).
"You seem happy", the sahyeong remarks to him when he is tired of talking and leans on his shoulder as he did many, many years ago.
"Oh, they make me so exhausted, sahyeong", he complains, but without heat; his eyes close; he wants to sleep so badly, "but..." and he thinks of all those children again; Cheong Myeong smiles, "I'm proud of them".
His sahyeong's hand is on his head, affectionate and gentle, as if he were a child again.
"I know, Myeong-a", and he feels like he's being lifted up in his arms, and he clings with his little hands to someone else's clothes, "you did a good job, now get some rest".
And Cheong Myeong falls asleep in eternity.
(Above his grave, next to one of their ancestors with whom Cheong Myeong insisted he be buried once, sprouts a plum tree that no one planted there; it blooms earlier and longer than any other.)