Archive of Our Own

There was a part of Deuce Spade that hated college parties, the lights and the sounds, the way he was technically too young to drink but there always was an older student putting a red solo cup in his hand, the way he would always drink it—it felt like too much. And. Yet. There was a part of Deuce that loved the chaos—the anarchy of it all, how easy it was to talk to people with liquid courage, the lights and the sounds.

But for all his love of these parties, he liked to hang back, near the far wall, and people watch the rest. It was interesting to him, watching people dance and laugh and drink.

A girl caught his eye—he had no interest in her, and that made him feel bad. She had approached him earlier in the evening, clearly attracted, and he fumbled some form of words that she understood as a rejection. She had seemed nice, and had that same shade of blueish-black hair that he did.

He watched her, as if caught by a snare, pulled along by red eyes.

A light scarlet, the pure mix between a splatter of blood and a sweet, light coating of strawberry jam.

He watched her, as if caught by a snare, pulled along by red eyes, the very same eyes that had captured him on his first day of class.

Red eyes, orange-scarlet hair.

Deuce leaned against a doorway, feeling his chest tighten. It wasn’t the first time he watched Ace like this, and yet—

Ace’s lips met hers, the girl, but one eye opened mid-kiss and he glanced to Deuce.

And Deuce swore he could see Ace smirk into that kiss.

Watch me, he was saying. Watch me.

Deuce froze, feeling both so insignificantly small and yet as if he had been caught taking up too much space. His hand around the red plastic cup shook slightly. It crinkled, audibly, in his hand.

The kiss had ended and the girl had moved to whisper in his ear. Deuce could tell Ace was only half listening to her, mostly lording his smirk over Deuce, before Ace’s eyes shifted to look at her.

Deuce couldn’t entirely understand whatever they were talking about, but when Ace made a motion to the stairs, to go upstairs, Deuce swallowed hard.

Ace shot him one more look, another grin, before he slipped away.

Deuce breathed hard, pushing his back further against the wall. As everyone danced around him—the lights and the sounds—he could only swallow hard. His lips were wet with the remnants of whatever beer was on his lips, and he wondered, couldn’t help but wonder, what it was like to feel Ace’s lips on him.

The vivid image of her kissing him, wondering what it would be like to be in her place—

To kiss Ace, letting hands wander. Would Ace be the one asking him to go upstairs, to—

Deuce shook his head, like a wet dog trying to shake thoughts away.

“I’m pathetic,” he whispered to no one but himself.

Watch me, Ace had said with that one look. Watch me.

————　　————

At the end of his first year, Deuce was happy to spend summer in the city. On one hand, he missed home and had honestly considered going back for four months—but with most of his friends staying, and one of them getting him a part time summer job, he indeed decided to stay.

A wide lake was filled with the sounds of college kids laughing and splashing.

Ace and Deuce were sitting on the wooden deck.

Ace was shirtless, and he made a soft noise as he stretched.

Deuce still had his shirt on, as did most, as they had just begun jumping into the cold lake.

Ace looked straight up, dark sunglasses protecting his eyes, arching his neck. “Hey—”

Whatever Ace had said, Deuce had missed it for the curve of Ace’s jugular. He forced himself to listen, ears not eyes, he told himself, as he often had to when Ace was—“What?”

“Dumbass,” whispered Ace, the smile warm in his voice as he spoke the word.

The one word that would usually send Deuce into fight or flight (well, fight; there was only ever fight), when Ace said it like that…

“I’m gonna take a dip.” Ace took off his sunglasses and tossed it next to Deuce. He pushed off the pier, plunging himself in the cold water. He splashed Deuce’s legs once before turning and heading towards the others in the lake.

Deuce watched him and swallowed hard.

Footsteps of soft swimming slippers against hardwood took his attention.

Deuce glanced back.

“You know he’s doing it on purpose, right?” Cater was shirtless, and had his own orange-rimmed sunglasses resting on his forehead. “You do know that, right, Deuce?”

“Uh…” Deuce blinked. “Huh?”

Cater squatted down to be at eye-level with Deuce. “He likes making you feel cornered.”

Deuce swallowed hard. “Is that why he’s… always kissing the girls I’m supposed to be into…?”

“Hm. I don’t know.” Cater eyed Ace from a distance. “Maybe he gets off on it. There are those straight guys who like it when fags are into them.”

Deuce swallowed hard—he, himself, had never been comfortable with that term, but was trying to be okay around Cater using it, mostly for himself if anything. But something bigger was scratching at him. “Am… I that obvious?”

“Hm… I mean those who know, know, y’know?” Cater gave him a wink. “I’m not gonna tell anyone you like boys, Deuce.”

“O-Oh… okay…”

“But… don’t get too lost in it, okay?” Cater’s eyes didn’t hold the smile he was faking. “Something like this, with a guy like that… it won’t go anywhere, okay? It never does…”

“I know…”

————　　————

“Shit—shit shit shit,” Ace hissed in a way that caught Deuce’s attention.

Deuce was eating a snack when the flurry of movement caught his attention.

The two of them were roommates… and Deuce swore it was going to be the death of him.

“My girlfriend’s coming over—” Ace was tugging a shirt off of himself. “Fuck fuck fuck.”

Deuce paused. Ace had always had a string of girlfriends, but had never brought her along to things—and in fact it was usually a different girl every time. Deuce had kept a small catalogue of them in his head, the smart one, the dumb one, the good looking one, the one that was just okay— Ace’s words, not his own.

“Fuck!” Ace was scrubbing something under running water. “Why do they make lipstick so damn waterproof now? If it’s that permanent then maybe also make it so it doesn’t leave marks?”

“Your girlfriend doesn’t wear lipstick,” Deuce pointed out.

He had catalogued all of them, details of them all, probably better than Ace did.

“Well, yeah.” Ace huffed. “The lipsticks not from my girl. Just, you know, a girl.”

“You cheated on her?”

“Fuck I gotta shower—this shit’s not coming off unless I scrub until I’m red.” Ace dropped the hand towel and began taking off his belt. “Cover for me?”

Deuce said nothing—but when he let Ace’s girlfriend in he said, “He’s taking a shower…” The rising question of why was clear on her face, but Deuce had already prepared his answer, based on what had happened less than a week ago. “We were arguing about something dumb and he accidently spilled soda on himself.”

“Oh,” she said with a sudden laugh.

Soon enough, the bathroom door opened, and Ace loosely had a towel around his waist.

Deuce eyed him—

“Hey babe,” Ace said with a signature wink. “Just gimme a sec to dry off!”

Deuce forced himself to look away, and yet the image of how each drop of water rolled down…

————　　————

Ace was cruel, but not excessively cruel—he had broken it off with that girl within a week or two. He called himself selfish for it, and Deuce agreed… but also thought there was a twisted form of kindness, not to let her know she had been cheated on. Ace, being Ace, was able to spin some tale about self-discovery that made her feel okay about the otherwise bad breakup.

And now Deuce watched as Ace went back to his string of flings—

Another party.

There was a part of Deuce Spade that hated college parties, the lights and the sounds, the way he was technically too young to drink but there always was an older student putting a red paper cup in his hand, the way he would always drink it—it felt like too much. And. Yet. There was a part of Deuce that loved the chaos—the anarchy of it all, how easy it was to talk to people with liquid courage, the lights and the sounds.

But for all his love of these parties, he liked to hang back, near the far wall, and look at others. It was so interesting to him, watching people dance and laugh and drink.

“Hey,” came Trey’s voice. It had that usual tilt that Deuce was able to identify, the same one Cater used, that lit of sound that meant one of the older students were worried about him. “He sure is a player, isn’t he?”

Deuce pretended not to know what Trey was talking about, and Trey clearly played along to appease his pride.

“Ace.” Trey just sighed.

Deuce glanced over—

He had been watching for some time.

Not one, but two girls were sitting with him on a couch as he was telling some story, looking at each of them just enough to captivate them both. They were both laughing, and Ace was smiling from ear to ear.

“He’s bored,” Deuce whispered.

Trey blinked. “Huh?”

“He’s bored out of his mind,” Deuce pointed out. “He started telling them a story because he hates it when they talk about themselves nonstop.”

“Hm.” Trey raised an eyebrow. “Sure, talking about yourself can get annoying after a while… but what else are you supposed to do?”

“I don’t know.”

Another concerned sigh. “Well… I’m going for some fresh air if you want to join me?”

Deuce considered it. “Maybe.”

“Alright… Don’t let it get to you, okay?”

“Don’t let what get to me?”

Trey eyed him, that look that said he knew exactly what was going on.

Deuce couldn’t bare the look, and he glanced away.

Trey just sighed.

When Trey left, Deuce drank the entire plastic cup of beer before he looked up—to Ace.

There was a twist in his stomach immediately.

Ace had been looking his way, as if annoyed that he was talking to Trey instead of watching him. But the moment their eyes met… It was like a pulse, a heartbeat of joy sending a shockwave of energy back into Ace. That mischievous grin said it again and again. Watch me. Watch me, Deuce.

Deuce’s eyes widened. “Don’t tell me…”

So far, college had been good for Deuce, he had gotten better at all things, but he still struggled when it came to conversations. He still wanted to know how to initiate holding hands, let alone more, to even know when someone was interested in him, and yet Ace—

Not one, but two people—

One mouth kissing him, while the other unzipped his jeans and moved between his legs—

Deuce watched, eyes widening.

He watched how pleasure moved across Ace’s face.

Ace opened one eye to make eye contact with him.

Watch me, he was saying. Watch me.

If only because it tore right through him, if only because Deuce thought he would actually die on the spot if he continued, he forced himself to look away—forced himself to take Trey up on the offer of fresh air… but that image was burned into his brain, and he had a feeling Ace wasn’t bored at all anymore.

————　　————

“Hey, Deuce.”

Deuce looked up from the comic book he was reading, and blinked.

“How’s this outfit?” Ace had a black button up shirt and a scarlet red tie. A formal pair of dark slacks. “What do you think?”

ears not eyes

Deuce blurted out, “Why?”

“Hey I need an opinion, man.” Ace turned his body one way, then another. “I’m not used to like. Stuffy clothes. Is this okay?”

Was Ace being honest? Did he want to know, or was he just playing the game again? Deuce eyed Ace for a moment, seeing that smile… Yes, he was being honest. Deuce could tell: Ace was pretending to play the game, but he actually wanted to know. “Why ask me?”

“‘Cause.”

Because I’m gay?

“Because you always dress good.”

Deuce blinked. “What?”

“Oh c’mon, you know how many girls I’ve banged by them asking about you first?”

Deuce blinked. “What?”

“They wanted to fuck you,” Ace clarified, “But I fucked them instead.”

“H-Hey—”

“What?” Ace dropped his knees so they were against Deuce’s seat. “Mad? That I took what was yours?”

Deuce pondered. Was that it? “No,” it wasn’t that. How could he explain it. Maybe it was the fact he was still a virgin, not a surprising thing at his age, but the inadequacy—

“You don’t even like women.”

“That’s—” Deuce stiffened.

“Ah, c’mon, Deucey.” Ace grinned. “You like looking at me, don’t you?”

Deuce grit his teeth.

Ace’s smirk seemed blurry, as if it was a strong colour stuck on a paint brushed, being washed away with hot water, streaks until clear. “Sorry…” He looked away. “Felt weird to tease you about that…”

“Why?”

“Huh? I don’t know.”

“You’re a heartbreaker,” Deuce whispered. “Why am I any different than the girls you string along and fool around with?”

“Well, Deuce, I don’t fuck with—”

Men?

“—virgins, or the sweet kinds. You know?” Ace shrugged. “The too sweet kind. The ones that take forever to get the ball rolling. Anyway, how do I look?”

Deuce sighed and looked away. “Shirt and pants are the same colour… looks off.”

Ace looked down at himself then sighed. “Yeeaaahhhhh…. You got a point.”

Deuce watched Ace walk away. He tried to go back to his comic book, but he couldn’t think about much else. He put his comic book down.

“You think this is a decent gift?” Ace waved a lipstick around. “I stole it.”

“You—” Deuce just stared. “What?”

“I don’t know.” Ace shrugged. “I was using a chick’s bathroom after we banged and I took it.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know! I just did,” Ace explained. “It’s too late now.”

“So… you’re gifting it back?”

“No, this is a different girl. It’s not opened yet, so it’ll be a good gift, right?”

Deuce eyed him, squinting.

Ace’s smirk came back in full force.

“You—” Deuce began, but stopped himself.

“What?” Ace egged him on. “I’m what? A monster?”

Cater had said, “He gets off on it.”

Deuce felt his jaw tighten.

“Finish your sentence, Deucey.”

“You…” Deuce met his eyes. “I hope… I hope one day you find someone you actually like.”

Ace’s smile fell, and he stared at Deuce.

They said nothing.

And hours later, Deuce got a text. He was in the same spot on the couch, though it was much darker outside. It was a text from a girl, asking What did I do wrong? Why did Ace break up with me? Deuce had heard Ace’s spiel enough times to know what to say.

You did nothing wrong.

He’s just figuring himself out.

Deuce wondered if that was a lie.

————　　————

Another day at the lake, another day on the pier. Deuce watched Ace, watched how he seemed to move a bit lifelessly. Some girl had talked to him, but he hadn’t even noticed her. It wasn’t even a case of ears not eyes—Ace just seemed completely offline.

When it was just them Deuce said, “Ace—”

“I’m going home,” Ace cut him off.

“I’ll go with you.”

Ace shot him an annoyed look.

“It’s my home too,” he reminded.

Ace shrugged.

The bus ride was silent.

When they got home, it was dark. Ace usually showered as soon as he got home from the lake, another habit Deuce had remembered, catalogued, but since they hadn’t actually gotten in the water Ace just tugged off his shirt and threw it on the couch.

Deuce looked around the dark room. He turned on one of the weaker side table lamps, feeling like making it too bright would ruin something. “Ace.”

Ace had his back to Deuce when he hissed, “Stop that.”

Deuce blinked.

Ace turned around. “Don’t stare at me like that!”

Deuce breathed, feeling the air tight in his chest. “Like what?”

“With that face!”

“I…” Deuce frowned, and it was his turn to twist into a growl. “I don’t have another face!”

Ace’s tension was locked in one moment, and released in a sigh the next. The look he gave Deuce was an odd intersection of warmth and exhaustion. “Why do you always look at me like that?”

“Ace.”

“What?”

“I like you.”

Ace swallowed hard, bringing one arm up to hug his other arm. “Yeah. Figured.”

Deuce carefully crossed the distance. They were basically the same height, though he avoided eye contact. “Treat me like one of your girls tonight.”

“What—”

“Look.” Deuce decided he was too close. He sat on the couch and looked up. “I’ll. Do whatever you want.”

Ace almost glared. “Why?”

“Because that’s what I want.”

“You’re fucking kidding me, right? You know I’m an asshole, a monster, a cheater—”

“Yeah.” Deuce grabbed Ace’s wrist, that simple touch of skin on skin being more than he had ever felt—how it was like fire trailing through his entire body. He pulled Ace close, closer to him. “I know.”

Ace was pulled, and though it was awkward, somehow ended up in Deuce’s lap. Looking down at Deuce, he squinted. “I-I…” He shook his head. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I want to feel it.” Deuce looked up at him. Feeling Ace’s entire body weight in his lap was thrilling. “I’m tired of just watching.”

Ace looked at him with so many emotions it was like looking at him with nothing at all.

Deuce never dropped eye contact.

“No,” Ace whispered, “I don’t want to treat you that way.”

Deuce frowned. “Why not?”

Ace opened his mouth, and no matter how the muscles of his face, throat, and neck could move none of them could find an answer.

“Is…” Deuce raised one hand, touching Ace’s cheek gently. “Is it weird… if I do this?”

“It’s…” Ace made a soft noise, cheeks tinging pink as he leaned into the touch. “It’s fine.”

“Fine?”

“Deuce, I don’t fucking get you. Not one bit.”

“Why do you tell me everything, Ace?” Deuce’s eyes narrowed. “You tell me the things you don’t tell anyone else. You show me the real you… not the charming angel every girl thinks you are. The real you.”

“This fucked up guy?” Ace grit his teeth. “The cheater, heartbreaker, player, who sweet talks his way out of anyone getting mad at him?”

“I like him.”

There was something about the look in Ace’s eyes, loneliness, Deuce could relate to.

Ace said nothing.

“The bad boy…” Deuce smiled. “You know, I used to be a bad boy.”

“Middle school days again?”

“Felt like I was finally free, but I hated who I was.”

Ace’s jaw tightened.

“You’re letting me in… seeing the real you…” Deuce trailed his fingers across Ace’s cheek. “I… don’t think I could’ve done that with anyone… But, you know, the funny thing is… I don’t think I could fall for a nice guy. You on the other hand…”

Ace whispered, “Deuce…”

“Ace.” Deuce looked him dead in the eyes. “I want to kiss you… really bad.”

“Y-Yeah?” Ace shivered slightly.

“Yeah.”

“I’ve… never kissed a guy, you know?”

“I mean… me neither, technically.”

Ace’s lips tugged into a smile. He looked Deuce up and down. “I’m not gonna lie… I think you’re cute as hell, Deuce…”

“Did you like making me go mad, crazy, making me watch you?”

“Well, since I’m being weirdly honest…” Ace’s smile tugged further into a smirk. “It got me hard as fuck, knowing you were thinking about what I was doing with my dick.”

Deuce’s eyebrow twitched. “You did drive me crazy.”

“Yeah.” He looked down at them and he took a shaky breath. “So… what now?”

Deuce couldn’t help himself. His hands reached for Ace’s waistband and he whispered, “Watch me.”

“Nuh uh—” Ace had somehow hooked his hands under Deuce’s legs—Deuce couldn’t even follow the slippery handwork until Ace had pinned Deuce down on the couch, chest to chest. “Hey. Deuce. Can I…?”

Kiss me? Deuce wondered.

“Suck your dick?”

Deuce made a strangled noise in the back of his throat.

Ace couldn’t help but laugh. “You really thought you were gonna get the upper hand on me, huh?”

“Wh—Why does there need to be an upper hand?”

Ace considered the question, and his smirk faded. “I don’t know…”

“Ace.” Deuce swallowed hard. “Kiss me.”

Ace’s eyes widened, and his cheeks reddened.

Deuce couldn’t help but laugh, earning him a sharp hey!, but there was something about that look on Ace’s face. He grabbed Ace’s face with both hands and raised his head.

Ace wouldn’t be outdone—and met him halfway.

It was– soft, soft in a way Deuce hadn’t expected, the feel of Ace’s lips. Soft, and warm, and he inhaled Ace’s scent. His eyes were squeezed shut, wrinkles at the corners, and his hands couldn’t help but touch Ace’s sides. He was trembling, and it felt okay. 

Ace gently, so gently, bit Deuce’s lower lip, suckling on it. 

Deuce felt his body melt, like lava cake or rainwater wiggling down a window. He felt warm, and he shivered, and whimpered. 

When they separated, Deuce looked at Ace. His chest felt tight, in all the wrong ways. “Was—”

“I liked it,” Ace whispered. “A lot.”

Deuce relaxed. “Can we… again?”

“Yeah.”

Deuce let Ace lead, showing him something deeper, warmer. Deuce didn’t know how to describe it except there was more bite to the kiss— a hunger. He felt Ace push with his tongue, and he yielded. 

Ace’s hands cupped his face, as if to still his shaking. 

Deuce felt safer, warmer, and yet it made the shaking all the more worse. His fingertips scratched at Ace’s waistband. 

They looked at each other and Ace looked down Deuce’s body. “Take your shirt off.”

“H-Huh?”

“I don’t want to be the only one without a shirt on.”

“O-Oh.” Deuce tugged at his clothes, having to sit up, and he both shivered and squeaked when he felt Ace’s hand help pull his shirt off.

“Dude.” Ace laughed. “One sec you’re all demanding, next you’re cute as shit.” He leaned in and kissed Deuce’s shoulder. “Is this what dude’s are like?”

“W-Well, you’re the same,” Deuce pointed out.

“Shit.” Ace laughed harder. “I am… aren’t I?”

“Yeah…”

Ace pushed Deuce down again and he looked down Deuce’s body, eyeing the runner’s body, flat chest and thin hair from his navel dipping down lower… “Are you sure about this?”

“Huh?”

“I don’t know…” Ace breathed hard. “I just feel like… it’ll be weird to go back to… being friends if…”

“I like you.” Deuce frowned. “I already told you, I don’t care if you use me for… whatever this is. I’m not going to be just your friend anymore—anything but that.”

Ace met his eyes, understanding pooling in those light scarlets, the pure mix between a splatter of blood and a sweet, light coating of strawberry jam. “Even if my track record is cheating on all my partners? Even if I’m the worst guy you could ask for?”

“I know what I’m signing up for!” Deuce glared. “I… You don’t have to pretend to be the good guy. Not with me. Just be you… the person I like.”

“Why?”

“I like… that we don’t have to be anyone but us… Nobody but us.”

Ace’s hands slid down Deuce’s form, down to his hips. Dryly, more of a whisper, Ace muttered, “Well aren’t you lucky that I’m gonna ignore that weird warm feeling you gave me by sucking a dick for the first time…”

Deuce was about to reply, when Ace tugged on his waistband. The stretchy cloth of his swimwear pulled with the tug, easily bending to Ace’s whims. Deuce could only whisper, “Please, God.”

 “Damn, didn’t know you were a whimpery boy, Deuce.”

“I’m not as cool as you are,” whispered Deuce.

Ace looked up at him. “If you’re expecting me to compliment you—”

“No.” Deuce frowned. “That’s just. The truth. That’s who I am, and I don’t… have to pretend to be anyone else around you.”

“Oh.” Ace looked down. “Yeah that’s way too much emotion for me right now—lets see what your dick looks like.”

“A-Ace!”

Ace pulled Deuce’s swimwear down, until Deuce’s cock sprung up and whipped back, hitting his stomach with an audible thud.

Deuce looked down at himself, biting his lip. He had always been nervous about himself—early years on the internet and misinformation in his youth always had him feeling small, even if he later learned he wasn’t, but the sentiment never left him. He trimmed, since he felt that’s what he was supposed to do, but never knew if he was doing it right, and everything about himself, his body, it all lead to a single question—what if Ace didn’t like it—

“Dude.” Ace raised an eyebrow. “You’re thick as fuck.”

Deuce swallowed hard.

“Look at this fucking thing.” Ace grabbed it, and suddenly smiled. “Shit it’s warm, too?” He began stroking it, slowly, rolling the hood down and back up over the head.

Deuce made a noise, and though he didn’t know what noise he had made he could judge from Ace’s reaction it maybe wasn’t the coolest or manliest. He watched Ace’s hand on him, stroking him, with a comfortable rhythm. As if it was his own. It crossed his mind that Ace had to be uncut like him, then, and that thought made his head feel funny. He’d been curious, not that it mattered, but he wanted to know every detail about Ace’s body—

Deuce looked at the way Ace eyed him—

Did. Had. Was… Ace curious about every detail of his body, in that same way?

Deuce felt his cheeks flush with heat. “Ace…”

“You know, I will say… I like going down on chicks, but I always felt a bit jealous of ‘em when they sucked my dick. Looked like fun.”

Deuce muttered, “I was also jealous of them…”

Ace looked up and grinned. “Yeah? You wanna suck my dick?”

Deuce couldn’t say much, but when Ace’s hand just squeezed his dick it made Deuce throw his head back.

“You know what? When I first saw your dick I was like damn I’m jealous, but given you don’t have much confidence it’s kind of like a good for you, man vibe now. You need that.”

“Ace please shut the fuck up.”

Ace laughed, and leaned in to let his lips meet Deuce’s for a short, chaste kiss. “I’m just nervous…”

“You?” Deuce blinked. “Nervous?”

“Yeah.” Ace bit his lip. “I’d say sorry for being unattractive with my nervousness, but I still got you beat in coolness rating so—”

Deuce grabbed the top of Ace’s head and began pushing down—there was an uproar of laughter from Ace as he was pushed down, until… “O-Oh.”

Ace pushed the raw head into his mouth.

Deuce gasped. Wet, warm, he could feel how soft the inside of Ace’s mouth was, and how firm that tongue felt right on the sweet spot of his underside. Ace wasted no time sucking, and Deuce gasped.

Ace’s hand moved down, feeling Deuce’s shaft in a loose grip before he got down to cupping Deuce’s balls, rolling his thumb in smooth circles as he – while neither nervously nor confidently – moved his mouth. He made a little noise, as if he was enjoying it, though…

Deuce watched, hearing that little noise and watching. He didn’t even think as he moved his hips to push it further—

It hit the back of Ace’s throat, and he coughed.

“S-Sorry—”

Ace moved his head back. “Nah. That was hot.” He licked his lip. “Just took me by surprise. Wanna fuck my mouth?”

Deuce looked at Ace’s face, seeing him clearly more excited by this than Deuce, but that wasn’t to say Deuce wasn’t desperate. He just gave a shy nod.

Ace put his hands on Deuce’s bare hips and slipped the cock back in his mouth.

Deuce moved. His virgin hips rolling, pumping upwards into Ace’s mouth. “Oh fuck—” Deuce brought one hand to loosely cover his mouth. He looked down, and the sight before him—

Watch me, he was saying. Watch me.

It wasn’t even on purpose this time, Deuce knew, and for some reason that made him weaker than ever. “I’m gonna—”

Already?

“Sh-Shut up, I’ve never d-d-done this… F-Fuck it feels… r-r-really good—” He moved his hips back, as if trying to pull out.

But Ace pushed forward, grabbing Deuce’s cock with both hands and keeping his mouth firmly on that sensitive head.

“Ah—!”

Ace kept bobbing his mouth—

“A-Ace…” Deuce shivered. “T-T-Too much—”

Swallowing, Ace lifted his head and smirked.

Deuce didn’t think twice about grabbing his waistband and tugging up.

“What? Gonna hide your junk from me now?” Ace kissed the bit of skin on Deuce’s hips he could before the swim trunks went up.

Deuce muttered, “Shut up… Um. Did you…?”

“—You’re asking me?” Ace chuckled. “More like time to praise me for my first time giving head. Did you enjoy it?”

“Y-Yeah… a… a lot.” Deuce blushed. “But… did you?”

“Honestly…? I’m kinda mad—they always complained about it, but I kinda like the taste of cum.”

Deuce had a full body reaction when he sputtered some nonsense. After a second he murmured, “Th-They’re allowed to not like it…”

“Guess you’re right.” Ace licked his lips. “I guess I’m just that much of a fag, huh?” He looked up at Deuce. “Can I say that now?”

“I—I don’t know—” Deuce scowled. “I don’t make the rules!”

“You’re gay dude you literally do.” Ace tilted his head. “I might be bi, though, so can I still say it?”

“I don’t know!”

Ace laughed, again, he laughed in such rhythmic joy.

It made Deuce weak.

Ace crawled up Deuce’s body, until they were at eye level again. “Tell me something.”

“Wh-What?”

“I tease you so much, all the time, and I get you all mad and riled up… but you also look like you’re having fun…” Ace’s smile faded, and his eyes seemed serious. “Are you also enjoying it… or am I just being an asshole that pisses you off?”

Deuce met his eyes. “Don’t change.”

Ace’s eyes widened.

“You rile me up, but… if I really got mad…”

“You’d threaten to throw me down in a fight? Like you did our neighbours?”

Deuce’s cheeks blushed.

“Still got some bad boy left in you, huh?” Ace grinned. “Fuck. Deuce. You’re so goddamn pretty.”

“I— What? When did we? Start talking about that?”

“No your face is so fucking pretty.” Ace cupped it, staring at him. “Drives me fucking crazy and I’ve never told anyone how bad I…”

Deuce had catalogued a lot of information about Ace. It was like detecting patterns, and he was good at it.

“Yeah,” Ace had said, “That’s way too much emotion for me right now—”

Drives me fucking crazy and I’ve never told anyone how bad I…

Deuce could finish the sentence in his head: —fell for you, but he could also predict what Ace was going to say instead.

“—want you to suck me off.”

Knowing still didn’t help stop the feeling like his whole life was on fire in a single moment.

“You’re dying to,” Ace whispered with a smirk, “Aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” whispered Deuce, finding no reason to hide anything, no reason to stop himself from baring his desires, from being transparent. He knew admitting it would only fuel the wildfire that was Ace Trappola and yet, “Yeah,” he said, wanting Ace to burn his whole world down.

“Bet you were thinking about me, about what I was doing, whenever I was balls deep in someone—weren’t you?”

“Yeah, I was.” Deuce watched that look of hunger grow on Ace’s face. “I couldn’t think about anyone but you. I want it. I want you.”

Ace licked his lips and grabbed Deuce’s hand. He put it between his legs, until Deuce’s hand was firm against the stiff clothed outline in his swimwear. “You’re crazy about me, huh?”

“Yes.”

“Then come get me.”

Deuce grabbed Ace’s hips. He was stronger than Ace, muscles firmer than Ace, and so he pushed Ace until his head was against the armrest on the other side of the couch. He kissed Ace’s neck, tasted his collar, kissed his shoulder, his chest, his stomach—

“Holy shit.” Ace threw his arms back and watched. “You look good going down on me, Deuce.”

Deuce couldn’t help but wonder—was Ace saying it just to give him more confidence? To make him feel better? It was working, and to an extent Deuce knew Ace knew it was working. He kissed at Ace’s navel. There was no trail of hair there, though he wasn’t surprised—he had stared at Ace’s body a thousand times. Ace didn’t have much hair on his body at all—

A shame, Deuce thought, given how that orange-scarlet hair was mind numbing.

Ace grabbed his swim trunks and pushed them down.

Deuce felt something soft yet stiff hit his face, and the instinct to lean over and kiss it took over.

“Fuck.” Ace was hard as hell, a good size but not nearly as thick as Deuce’s.

Deuce’s mind flashed a thousand fantasies, of all the people Ace hooked up with, pushing this exact shape into all of those fantasies. He grabbed Ace’s dick and pulled the hood back, pushing the head into his mouth.

“Ah…” Ace closed his eyes. “Fuck, you really like me, huh?”

Deuce wanted to drink from Ace’s entire existence.

“Keep going, Deucey.”

Deuce saw the trimmed red hair at the base and it made his head feel fuzzy. He pulled the dick out of his mouth to say, “You’re pretty too.”

Ace looked down, blinking. “Huh?”

“You’re pretty.” Deuce licked his lips, looking up Ace’s body up to that face. He saw the streak of red from one cheek to the other, and somehow the fact he made Ace blush like that set a fire in him. “You’re such a pretty boy, with your hair and your eyes and your smile and your laugh—”

“Deuce I might literally die—”

“You’re pretty, Ace.” He grit his teeth. “Bet your girlfriends never told you that.”

He didn’t think Ace’s blush could get any redder, and yet he was proved wrong.

Deuce pushed the cock back in his mouth. It felt strange, alien. He wasn’t sure how to open his mouth, but he wasn’t getting any complaints. Instinct seemed to take over and bobbed his head. He tugged at the swimwear, wanting to pull it off Ace’s legs entirely. He wanted Ace naked, and free for him to touch. Soon his hands were wandering bare thighs, and Ace was making a shaky noise.

“Shit, Deuce.” Ace looked up to hide his face as he placed both arms over it. “Did I torture you too much?”

Deuce knew the answer was yes, but he couldn’t stop taking Ace into his mouth, pulling moans out of him. He pushed, relaxing his throat, until he took Ace entirely.

“No way this is your first time, Deu—”

Deuce pressed his nose into the short trimmed hairs at the base, taking a hit of that scent, and it made him feel electric.

“D-Deuce, c-c’mon e-ease up a bit I’m gonna c-cum way too fast—”

Deuce needed more, wanted more, only feeling when he felt the tip of Ace’s cock as far down his throat as it could go.

“Sh-Shit D-Deuce I’m— O-Oh f-fuck—”

Deuce was surprised more by the way that he felt Ace’s cock pulse and throb than the noise Ace made—long and drawn out.

There was a moment of silence.

Deuce raised his head, looking to Ace. He was looking for some sort of cue, instruction on what was next.

But Ace still had his head thrown back over the couch’s armrest, whimpering as both elbows had their  inner curves over his face.

Deuce looked at Ace’s body, from between his legs up to his collar, his neck, his jaw, his hidden face. “Ace?”

“Mm.”

“Ace… are you feeling… shy?”

“… A bit. Shut up.”

“It wasn’t… a dig or anything…”

“I know…” Ace peeked one eye to Deuce. Light scarlets, the pure mix between a splatter of blood and a sweet, light coating of strawberry jam.

Deuce wondered how he would’ve reacted, if a boy as sweet as strawberry jam was constantly painted as a blood splatter.

“Dude.” Ace looked at him. “I’m not straight.”

Deuce couldn’t help but smile at that. He reached over to kiss Ace’s cheek, but hesitated. “Is it okay if…”

“Deuce… I don’t.” A breath. “I don’t… want to be… bad to you.”

Deuce raised a hand to push Ace’s other elbow out of the way, wanting to see both eyes.

“Where’d you throw my pants…?” Ace muttered, “I kinda made fun of you but you’re right, kinda weird to be all… naked now.”

Deuce glanced around. “You don’t want to stay like this?”

Ace frowned. “I just pointed out you put your shorts back on.”

“I didn’t make you crazy about me for a year.”

“Here’s the fucking thing, though, you did, you just weren’t intentional about it because you’re not as smart as me to pull that off!”

Deuce smiled.

Ace huffed. “Whatever.” He wrapped both his arms around Deuce, turning them so they were on their side. They were a tangle of limbs, and had to move to get properly comfortable, but by the end it wasn’t clear who was in whose arms, and Ace hummed as he realised that was the point. “Um…”

Deuce nudged Ace’s cheek with his nose to get him to continue.

Ace sighed. “You don’t… regret this, do you?”

“No.” Deuce paused for a moment. “Do you?”

“Hm…” Ace looked away. “Feels kinda scary, to be honest… but I don’t think I regret it. Not yet, anyway.”

Deuce kissed his cheek.

Ace almost melted in shivers at the small affection. “You… really don’t care? The mess that I am? The things I do…?”

“No.”

Ace said nothing for a while, then hummed and wiggled. He moved so his head tucked between Deuce’s neck and shoulder. “Don’t worry, Deuce, I’ll still hold you like a baby… just always got curious, what it was like, to be in someone’s big strong arms…”

“I wouldn’t know,” he admitted.

“Well, it’s my turn, right now. You gotta wait.”

Deuce laughed and kissed the side of his head. “Sure.”

“I…” Ace closed his eyes. “Thanks… for seeing me… as…”

“As?”

“As… nah, just thanks for seeing me.”

“Ace… you saw me first.”

“I… Oh.”

————　　————

“So…” Cater’s voice had that usual tilt that Deuce was able to identify, the same one Trey used, that lit of sound that meant one of the older students were worried about him. “You two are for real for real?”

“Uh…” Deuce blinked as he looked at Cater.

Four months had passed since then, four months of firsts, of dating Ace, of yelling at the top of his lungs when his boyfriend was being an obnoxious idiot—the best four months of his life.

“Yeah.”

Trey sipped his coffee and sighed. “You really didn’t let it upset you, huh?”

Deuce considered those words. “No?”

They were walking on campus when orange-scarlet approached them—

“Hey.” Ace smirked as he walked right into Deuce, smooshing his face into Deuce’s cheek.

Deuce smiled at that. “Hey.”

“Hold my bag,” Ace muttered. “My shoulder hurts.”

“Sure.”

“Thanks, loser.”

Deuce rolled his eyes.

“Hey,” Cater whispered as he spiritually circled Ace like a vulture. “Are you actually gay?”

“I don’t know,” Ace admitted. “I like Deuce though.”

“So,” Trey whispered as he spiritually circled Ace like a vulture. “Are you actually a good boyfriend?”

“Gonna give that one a hard no,” Ace admitted again. “I’m kind of a douchebag.”

“He’s a good boyfriend,” corrected Deuce.

Boyfriend.

Deuce didn’t know how many girls had texted him—the smart one, the dumb one, the good looking one, the one that was just okay— Ace’s words, not his own. Deuce’s cataloging had finally paid off. So many questions, they had texted him. He had been honest, saying Ace was probably attracted to more than just guys, but that this was where his road of self-discovery led him. He was lucky Ace had used that line, self-discovery, on each of his breakups.

Ace bit his cheek—another annoying affectionate habit he picked up on.

But maybe he hadn’t been lying, even if he didn’t know it.

“Deuce… I don’t,” Ace had said, “I don’t… want to be… bad to you.”

Deuce hadn’t exactly had high expectations, and he knew exactly who he was getting involved with, and yet—

“So.” Cater offered that dangerous fake smile. “What changed, Ace?”

“Are you guys gonna really grill me every day?” Ace frowned. “It’s been four months.”

“Ace,” Trey had so much diplomacy with his smile, “You technically never answered.”

Ace took Deuce’s hand and swung it slightly. “I don’t know… it’s just… when someone sees you for who you are… it’s kind of like… you finally get to be yourself a lot more. Or maybe… it just gets easier to be like, a better you.”

“Mhm?” Cater’s eyes narrowed.

Trey scratched the back of his head. “Seems a bit convenient.”

“Hey, Deuce.” Ace frowned. “Right now you’re being the shitty boyfriend, back me up here!”

Deuce smiled. “We’re happy.” He put his hand on Ace’s side and pulled him close. “That’s all.”

Ace met his eyes, and smirked.

Deuce knew the view in front of him was changing, and yet it never felt like he couldn’t see Ace. He, too, was changing. More confident, more relaxed, happier—he wondered for only a moment if Ace could see all that too.

Watch me, Ace had said. Watch me.

I always have, and I always will.