Chapter Text
According to Karin, it was about time.
Yuzu just insisted that he come back to visit every now and then.
Isshin had been predictably dramatic. In fact, he had still been wailing and hugging Masaki’s portrait when Ichigo walked out the door.
But now that he was here, Ichigo knew he was home.
The sensation of heavy reiatsu around him was novel and exciting and everything he remembered it being. It had been three years since he had been in the Seireitei for the war against the Quincies - far too long, if he had anything to say about it. He obviously belonged here more than he had ever belonged anywhere else.
After all, he was a shinigami.
The thing was, standing just inside the Seireitei, he was at a loss. What exactly did shinigami do? If he was honest, he hadn’t really thought this through. He was just… restless. Karakura Town was nice. In a way, it was home, but only because his family was there. Otherwise, it felt far more right to be around others who really knew and understood him.
With a sigh, he stepped into shunpo and began wandering aimlessly. He had no idea where anything was, so even if he had a specific person in mind that he wanted to find, he would have to use his somewhat underdeveloped skill of reiatsu sensing to find them instead of just going to their division. After a while, a familiar reiatsu signature blipped through his senses and he smiled.
Perfect.
It didn’t take him more than a moment to divert his path and alight in front of a door. He didn’t bother knocking. This was clearly an office, not someone’s quarters, because he now sensed the two who occupied the room and, as far as he knew, there wouldn’t be any reason for these two particular shinigami to be together in quarters.
“Hey!” Ichigo called when he slid the shoji door open. He glanced around to find the redhead he’d been seeking out and a broad smile spread on his lips. “Renji, long time no see.”
Renji was distracted, in the process of copying down the orders his captain was dictating to him for distribution to the rest of the division. So while he had sensed the new reiatsu signature on a subconscious level, Ichigo’s voice ringing through the office still startled him badly enough that his hand jerked, smearing ink across the parchment. “Ichigo!” he cried out excitedly, looking up with a grin. A quick glance over at his captain had him adding in a slightly more measured tone, “Erm… how long are you here for?”
Ichigo followed Renji’s gaze over to Byakuya, huffing out a small chuckle at the glare the stoic captain was giving him. “Good to see you, too, Byakuya,” he said amusedly, not intimidated in the slightest. Then, to Renji he added, “As long as I want, I guess. I finally ditched Karakura Town for good. I was just… bored.” He shrugged and crossed his arms loosely over his chest. “Couldn’t train, finished college early… There just wasn’t anything left there for me.”
“Really?!” Ignoring the fact that he absolutely had not finished what he was supposed to be doing - and had actually just made it worse - Renji jumped up from his desk and grabbed Ichigo around the shoulders to pull into a rough hug.
Ichigo pulled his arms from between them and returned the hug, a bit confused but mostly just glad his friend was so enthusiastic about his permanent return to Soul Society. After all, it would have been quite a bit more difficult to actually settle in if he had felt like no one really wanted him here, either.
Which, Byakuya didn’t exactly appreciate him being there in particular, interrupting the work day. “Renji,” the captain said sharply.
Renji quickly let Ichigo go and stepped back, wincing slightly when he caught sight of Byakuya’s face. “Sorry, taicho…”
“We were nearly finished and you’ve now ruined an entire page of work,” Byakuya pointed out, glancing at the smudged parchment on his lieutenant’s desk. Severe gray eyes flicked back over to Ichigo for only a moment before returning to Renji. “Sit down. You will socialize in your own time, not waste mine.”
With a tiny sigh, Renji settled back down at his desk. He shot Ichigo an apologetic look, telling him genuinely, “It’s good to see you, Ichigo. Come back by at noon? We can grab lunch together.”
“Hey, who said I’m going anywhere?” Ichigo replied. He took Zangetsu from his back, propping the blade against the wall by the door before going over and flopping down into a chair in front of Renji’s desk. “It’s not like I have anywhere to be. I can wait.”
Renji had to bite down on the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning at that. Nope. There was no way he was getting involved in this. Even if watching his friend push his uptight captain’s buttons was always a good time. Instead, he focused on grabbing a new scroll and copying over his ruined missive as quickly and neatly as possible.
In the meantime, Byakuya was still glaring, even if Ichigo was paying him no mind. “Perhaps you should pay the soutaicho a visit so that you do have somewhere to be. Do you plan to live out your days in Soul Society squandering your potential instead of becoming a productive member of the Gotei 13?”
Ichigo laughed. “Damn, I just got here, give me a break. I don’t even know what I want to do while I’m here. Maybe for once in my life, I want to figure that out instead of being pushed around and told what to do,” he replied, his expression playful even if his words were heavy.
Byakuya just scoffed, shaking his head slightly and turning his attention back to his own work.
Renji finished off copying what he’d already had and decided he might as well push his luck a bit while his captain had someone else to be annoyed at. “There’s no reason you need to figure it out right away,” Renji pointed out to Ichigo. “You’re welcome to crash with me while you figure it out if you want and you know there are a ton of people who will be happy to see you.”
“Yeah, there’s some people I’d like to catch up with,” Ichigo agreed, folding his hands behind his head and leaning his chair back on two legs. “And I’ll crash with you, if that’s cool. I always wished we had more time to hang out without having to worry about whether we were going to get killed,” he added with a bright grin.
“Course,” Renji agreed with a grin of his own. “The constant threat of death does put a damper on things. Speaking of which, the first person you should go see is Rukia or she’s going to kill me for not dropping everything to go tell her you’re here,” he teased, only half joking.
“Yeah, yeah,” Ichigo chuckled. “That was going to be my next stop. Of course, I don’t have a clue where anything is in this place, so I just came to the first familiar reiatsu signature I could find. I guess I’ll just -”
“Go,” Byakuya cut in, his eyes narrowed as he looked up from the papers on his desk. “Renji and I have work to complete. The Thirteenth Division is north from here. As you near its grounds, it should be simple even for you to find my sister.”
Ichigo sighed heavily, letting his chair drop back onto all four legs. “Fine,” he groaned. “I’ll see you later, Renji - since your buzzkill of a taicho is going to push me out.”
“Yeah, he does that,” Renji agreed absently as he waved his finished writing to dry it a bit. “See you later.”
Ichigo gave Renji a wave as he stood, taking Zangetsu back and then exiting the office.
Byakuya was silent for a moment, delaying in continuing to dictate his orders to Renji. He stared at the door for a long while and then brought guarded steel eyes over to his lieutenant. “What did you mean by what you said, Renji?” he asked, his tone slipping ever so slightly from its constant sharpness.
“Sorry?” Renji questioned, brow furrowing. He wasn’t sure what part of the previous conversation Byakuya was referring to.
“Never mind,” Byakuya muttered, closing his eyes and shaking his head to clear his thoughts. His lieutenant’s opinion of him didn't matter. “Let us get our work done, shall we?”
Renji frowned at him. “No, I just didn’t know what exactly you meant is all.”
“It doesn't matter,” Byakuya insisted.
“Alright, taicho…” Renji agreed with a soft sigh, having a feeling he’d missed something important. “Anyway, what else did you want me to add to this before I send it over to Rikichi?”
Byakuya finished prattling off his well-practiced script to Renji and he hoped it wasn't too obvious how distracted he was by his own thoughts. He dismissed them quickly when he concluded what he wanted Renji to pass on, summoning his usual poise as he rose from his desk. “You are dismissed for the rest of the day. Do not allow Kurosaki to become too much of a distraction from your work,” he said with a bit of undue venom in his voice.
Renji very nearly asked his captain just what exactly his problem with Ichigo was, but thankfully it quickly occurred to him how long that would likely take to explain. “Hai, taicho,” he agreed instead. Byakuya never let him leave early. There was no way he was sticking around to risk him changing his mind.
As soon as he was out of headquarters, Renji reached out to search for Ichigo’s reiatsu signature, hoping he could catch up with him at the Thirteenth if he was there now. Instead, all he felt were the usual division members there and it took a bit of searching to find Ichigo somewhere in the area of the Ninth Division. Shaking his head and thankful that at least Ichigo hadn’t ended up at the Eleventh, he took off to meet up with his friend.
Ichigo had just stepped back into shunpo on the roof of the Ninth Division office when he felt Renji approaching. He paused to wait on the tile peak, feeling more than a bit embarrassed that he had ended up so far off track. But Byakuya had just pointed him north, which wasn’t exactly a sufficient amount of direction. “Done with work already?” Ichigo asked when Renji touched down next to him.
Renji shrugged. “Taicho told me to take off early. I think he’s probably annoyed, but I wasn’t going to question him. Anyway, I’m free the rest of the day. And you, are very clearly lost,” he finished with a smirk.
“Yeah, shut up,” Ichigo shot back half-heartedly. “I just got actual directions from Shuhei - I got caught up talking to him for a minute, too. I was gonna make it to the Thirteenth this time.”
“Only for a minute? Shu must be having a busy day,” Renji said with a laugh. “Well, lead the way then, since you’ve got actual directions now.”
Ichigo jabbed Renji in the ribs before taking off again, knowing his friend couldn’t keep up with him at his fastest. The visit with Rukia went predictably… well, Ichigo supposed. If being punched in the gut then yelled at for not telling her about a decision he’d made less than a week ago counted as “well” - as though he would have had a chance to tell much of anyone. Eventually, she calmed down and genuinely told him that she was happy he had finally come to live where he belonged.
He agreed more than she would ever know.
“Alright, Renji, you said something about lunch,” Ichigo said as they made their way out of the Thirteenth Division grounds.
“Yeah, I was gonna take you to a place near the division, but since we’re over here already, I’ve got a better idea.” Renji led the way towards the border line that marked the edge of the Seireitei and the beginning of the Rukongai. Now that things had settled into peace times once more, the kido walls were thankfully a thing of the past. It made getting in and out for a quick lunch much more straightforward.
Ichigo was given pause when they arrived, and he was honestly hesitant to follow Renji into the place. Even from the storefront, he could see pastel colors and obscene numbers of bunny motifs inside - on the walls, at the front counter, and even in the cutesy centerpieces at each table. When he finally did go inside, he had to bite his bottom lip to keep from laughing, though he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. By some miracle, he kept himself quiet until they were seated, involuntarily sitting next to each other in the half-circle shaped booth seat that didn’t allow them to sit on either side of the table. “Hey, uh -” Ichigo began, but he began to chuckle as soon as he let his lip go from between his teeth. “What, um - what is this place?” he asked, more than a little bit amused.
“Hm?” Renji asked absently as he settled in. As soon as he looked over and saw the clear amusement on Ichigo’s face, he realized this might have been a slightly odd choice. “Okay, I know it’s a bit…” He waved a hand to encompass the pink and purple bunnies decorating their booth and settled on, “Much… But I swear the food is really good, okay?”
“Uh huh,” Ichigo replied, his smile turning teasing. He casually slung an arm over the back of the booth, behind Renji’s shoulders. “If you wanted to take me on a cute date, you could’ve just said so.”
“What?!” Renji sputtered, shooting him a hopelessly confused look.
“Hey, it wouldn’t bother me, this just isn’t the approach I would’ve thought you’d take,” Ichigo said, his eyes lit up with playfulness.
Renji had not even the faintest idea how to respond to the other man’s teasing about his sexuality, so he just frowned slightly at him. “It’s Rukia’s favorite restaurant. Obviously… Anyway, how'd you wind up deciding to come back to Soul Society to stay?”
“Yeah, that makes more sense…” Ichigo murmured, glancing around at the rabbit decor. He focused back on Renji’s question, though, shaking his head and trying to ignore just how… Rukia this place was. Honestly, it was the only way he could think to describe it now. “I just… like I said before, I just didn’t have anything left there. I mean, sure, I have Yuzu and Karin and dad, but I was going to move out soon anyway. I was done with school, thinking about getting a job, but everything just sounded so boring. Zan was driving me crazy - more than usual - and I knew I needed to be somewhere that I could train properly. Destroying artificial landscaping in Urahara’s basement only gives you so much satisfaction, you know? So… I just decided it was time to move on and come live where I’m supposed to be anyway,” he explained with a shrug.
“What about your human friends?” Renji wondered. “I mean, I suppose you can always go back and see them when you feel like it… And I mean, it’s great having you here for good. It really is. But won’t this… uh… isn’t living in different worlds going to be rough on you and Orihime?”
“What? Why would it be?” Ichigo asked, genuinely confused and taken off-guard by the question.
Renji frowned at him, equally confused. “Um… sorry… did you guys break up or something?”
“Oh, yeah… Yeah, we did. It was a while ago - a year or so. It was fine, though. It wasn’t a big fight or anything. Actually, I think she’s with Tatsuki now,” Ichigo explained, his nearly constant smile returning.
“Oh… shit, has it been that long since I’ve seen you? Wow, uh… anyway, at least it was amicable?” Renji was vaguely aware that he was rambling, but the alternative was falling into awkward silence, so he just let his mouth keep on rolling with, “So you’re single now then?”
“Yeah, that is what that would mean,” Ichigo replied teasingly.
“There are presumably other dateable women in Karakura,” Renji pointed out with a laugh, “It wasn’t an unreasonable question.”
“Sure, I guess,” Ichigo said, shrugging again. He wasn’t about to just blurt out that he and Orihime had broken up because he was decidedly - undeniably - very gay. He didn’t think it would bother Renji, but he had reacted a bit… strangely when he had teased him about taking him on a date. “Anyway, what’s good to eat here?” he asked, picking up his menu to distract himself.
“Oh, pretty much everything,” Renji said quickly, seizing onto the new topic like a lifeline. “But we usually just end up doing the lunch set. Except for one time where the chef decided for some awful reason that everything needed to be spicy, it’s always fantastic.”
“Sounds good. I'm not picky anyway,” Ichigo decided, putting his menu down again. Well, that distraction didn't last nearly long enough. After only a second, he picked the menu up again. “They have drinks here?” he asked, skimming over the menu’s contents.
“At the back,” Renji agreed, flipping his own menu around to scan the list. Now was an odd time to be realizing he’d never just… had a meal with someone he considered a good friend. He supposed that was why everything felt just slightly out of balance. And so, alcohol.
Ichigo felt a bit odd ordering a fruity cocktail, but it was what he honestly liked, and he doubted Renji would tease him over it. And even if he did, Ichigo knew he deserved it after teasing his friend so much. So, when the server made it over to their table, he pointed out a sakura and lychee flavored concoction, his confidence only faltering a bit as he ordered it.
Renji just grinned at him and took full advantage of the fact that Rukia wasn’t here to order his favorite pineapple cocktail. She’d made jokes for days the last time he’d ordered it in front of her.
Just the fact that Renji had chosen something equally… girly, for lack of a better term, set Ichigo at ease and he relaxed again. His arm was still around the back of the booth, unavoidably touching Renji's shoulders due to the other man's height, and he had to fight the urge to move his hand absently over his friend’s shoulder. It was just something he would do if he was sitting with Orihime this way back when they were dating. Not that this was a date, because it wasn't, and there was no way Renji was interested in him that way. He probably wasn't even gay, based on the way he had been a bit off-balance since Ichigo had taken a teasing jab at him.
So, silence fell between them again, and Ichigo's fingers flexed restlessly on the back of the seat behind Renji's shoulder.
Renji sighed heavily into the silence not long later and tipped his head back to rest against the padded back of the booth. “This is weird, isn’t it?” he mumbled, more to himself than to Ichigo. “Why is this weird?”
Ichigo just gave a hum that didn't answer anything at all. This was weird. But to him, it was weird because… Well, because he'd had a crush on Renji for a while. He hadn't realized it was a crush for a shameful amount of time, but it was, and now he was sitting here in a cute café having lunch and cocktails with a man he'd honestly rather be kissing.
Ichigo vaguely wondered if kissing Renji would make things less weird.
And promptly decided it wouldn't.
But… there was no harm in… pushing things in that direction and seeing what happened.
So, he finally let his hand fall onto Renji's shoulder, his fingers moving in random patterns over the fabric of his kosode.
Renji leaned into the touch like it was the most natural thing in the world, a small, pleased sigh leaving his lips. He’d always been tactile - as had pretty much all of his friends who grew up in the Rukongai. So it just felt right to drop a hand to Ichigo’s knee, mirroring the movements of the other man’s fingers without much thought.
Damn, Ichigo was in trouble. He couldn't get worked up here. It would be embarrassing anyway, with how innocently Renji was touching him, but it just felt good. Not to mention the fact that Ichigo had plenty of not-so-innocent images in his mind to remind him how this could end up going.
But it wasn't going to, and Ichigo had to adamantly convince himself of that. Renji was just physically affectionate. He'd hugged him as soon as he'd seen him, and it was just a friendly gesture. This didn't mean anything. But that didn't stop Ichigo from wanting it to mean something, and apparently that was enough to keep him pushing just a little bit further, scooting closer to Renji and resting his head on his shoulder.
Renji hummed happily as he tilted his head over to rest his temple against Ichigo’s hair. He was so content like this. It seemed like it would strain things to speak, however. So, he just continued tracing light patterns over the leg of Ichigo’s shihakusho and embraced the silence. Having an - objectively - quite attractive man leaning into his side was certainly an improvement to his usual company here. Not that he didn’t love Rukia and all. He just… also wanted to strangle her on a regular basis.
Ichigo had no idea what to do. This was nice, of course, but he didn't want to get too forward and ruin not only lunch but their entire friendship. This was enough. He could deal with this. Even if he was tempted to move his hand and run his fingers through the other man's ponytail… and then maybe take his hair down… because it had been really hot when it had fallen out of its tie when they had fought for the first time. And Renji was hot, all covered in blood with a determined glint in his eyes.
But that wasn't something Ichigo needed to think about right now, because he found himself pressing against Renji's side, his hand on the other's shoulder moving a bit more firmly. Instead, he distracted himself with more small talk. “Hey, so… You're caught up with what's been going on with me. What about you? How have things been here?” he asked, his voice forcedly level.
“Oh… fine, not much to tell…” Renji said vaguely. “I mean… yeah…” He was more distracted than he should be by the feeling of Ichigo leaning into his side, warm through the layers of their shihakusho. He’d always found the other redhead attractive - more than, really - but he’d never stopped to think… No, he shouldn’t even go there. It was Ichigo’s first day back in Soul Society. Renji was absolutely not going to risk making him uncomfortable.
Even though he was ridiculously hot and cuddling into him.
Well, that definitely wasn’t the conversation starter Ichigo thought it was going to be. Thankfully, their food and drinks arrived within a few minutes of silence falling between them again, and Ichigo had no choice but to slide away from Renji just a slight bit in order to eat. First, though, he took a sip of his drink, humming appreciatively both at the sweet flavor and the obvious presence of alcohol. “They make their drinks pretty strong. Sometimes you can’t even tell there’s alcohol in restaurant drinks,” he commented as he put down his glass and picked up his chopsticks.
‘Yeah, it’s honestly a problem sometimes,” Reni admitted with a laugh. “Rukia and I had to make a rule not to get any drinks if we were still on duty, even though one would honestly be fine. It’s too easy to not pay attention to how much you’ve had.”
“Yeah, I can see why. It tastes good, too,” Ichigo agreed. He didn’t wait before beginning to eat, and he had to hold back an entirely lewd sound of approval at his first bite. “Okay,” he said, his mouth still full. He swallowed the bite before continuing, “I get why you don’t give a damn about the bunnies. This food is fantastic.”
“Right?” Renji asked with feeling. When he took a bite of his own food, he abjectly failed at holding back an actual moan at the first bite.
It took far too much effort for Ichigo to ignore the sound Renji made, and he knew he was blushing a bit, involuntary as the reaction was. There was nothing for him to say, because he knew he would say something completely stupid if he tried to make conversation, so he just focused on his food, downing the rest of his drink as he ate. It wasn’t enough alcohol for him to feel remotely drunk, just enough to have him feeling lighter and more carefree than before - barely buzzed, really.
When he was finished with his meal, Ichigo sat back against the padded booth seat and strung his arm over Renji’s shoulders again. “So, what do shinigami actually do? Like, you don’t have work for the rest of the day. What would you usually do with free time like this?” he asked.
Renji finished off his own meal before relaxing again and leaning into Ichigo’s side, laying his head against the other man’s shoulder. “Mmm, I generally don’t… do much of anything actually.” He sighed, coloring slightly. “That sounds ridiculously boring, doesn’t it? It’s just that I don’t have a lot of free time, so when I do, I kind of just want to relax. You know?”
Ichigo shrugged. “I’m sure you work way harder than I ever have. At least, at any job. I had too much free time back home - I mean, in Karakura Town. But, I guess I get not wanting to overdo it when you finally do have some time off. So, umm… I guess we’ll go to your quarters after this, yeah? So I can… get settled in?” He chuckled. “Not that I have anything to get settled. I didn’t try to bring anything with me.”
“We’ll get you settled in, yeah,” Renji agreed. “And we can always go shopping for anything you need. But seriously, you’re welcome to stay with me as long as you want. I mean… if you’re thinking you might want to join a division, there’s no point in getting your own place anyway. And if not, you’ll still probably want to look around the Seireitei more before you decide on anything. Although actually, you probably have a claim to some of the Shiba holdings. So… there’s that. Anyway, the point is… there’s no need to decide anything yet…”
Ichigo shook his head, giving an amused grunt. “I don’t want anything dad left behind here. He was Toshiro’s captain, right? I’ll just give whatever’s left to him,” he decided, waving off the issue. He turned to give Renji a teasing smile, adding, “And by the sounds of it, you don’t want me getting my own place. Just one date and you’re asking me to live with you? You move fast.”
Renji choked on the last sip of his drink and narrowly avoided spewing it everywhere. “This - this - this isn’t a date,” he finally managed.
Ichigo bit his lip to keep from bursting out laughing. He was probably enjoying the look on Renji’s face a bit too much, so he couldn’t get himself to stop teasing him. “I’ve had worse dates than this, so even if it was, I wouldn’t exactly be disappointed.”
Renji was still half convinced Ichigo was mocking him for being gay, so his eyes narrowed slightly as he huffed back, “If this was a date, you would fucking know it.”
“Oh?” Ichigo asked, trying not to sound too interested. He had to remind himself that he didn’t even know if Renji was interested in other guys, much less him. To most of these shinigami, he was probably just a kid - a brother at most, not someone to date. “Guess it doesn’t matter, does it? Since this isn’t a date,” he finally said, trying to keep his humor alive.
“Obviously not,” Renji agreed with a half-hearted laugh. “I don’t make a habit of asking out straight guys.”
Ichigo’s mind blanked completely at the comment, and he knew he was staring at Renji with a dumbfounded look on his face. When his thoughts finally restarted, it sank in that his friend was gay, which was… well, it was more of a relief than Ichigo would ever admit to. Though, his next actions would probably show it fairly well. Before he knew what he was doing, his arm that was around Renji’s shoulders was stringing around his neck, pulling the other man in for a clumsy kiss. He didn’t linger for more than a second, his heart pounding and his hands trembling as he forced out, “What about not straight guys?”
Renji stared at him for a long, long moment. He wasn’t sure if he was imagining it or not, but he swore his lips were tingling from the all too brief kiss. “Oh…” he whispered, auburn eyes wide. A large part of him was still certain he was somehow managing to misinterpret Ichigo. “I… um… well, that’s… that would be… different…”
Ichigo wanted to drag Renji back in for another kiss, but he knew what would happen if he did that, and even he had more decency than to be so inappropriate in public. “We should pay and get out of here,” he suggested lowly, his arm still tight around the back of the other man’s neck.
“Yeah - uh, yes… yes,” Renji agreed in a raspy voice. “Let’s go.”
Ichigo was a mess of conflicted emotions all the way to Renji’s quarters. On the one hand, he hadn’t been pushed away or punched or anything like that. But on the other, Renji hadn’t said much, so he didn’t know exactly how the other man felt about what he had done.
By the time they actually reached the Sixth Division and he was being led into the lieutenant’s quarters, all that went out the window, though. Ichigo figured if he was going to kiss his friend in the middle of a restaurant, he might as well make his full intentions very clear as soon as they were alone. It was far better than the prospect of explaining himself in some long, drawn-out, boring conversation. So, when Renji slid the door shut, Ichigo didn’t hesitate to turn and forcefully coax the other man against the nearest wall, claiming his lips in a much more confident kiss and letting out a low moan in the back of his throat.
Renji groaned and kissed him back with barely a moment’s hesitation. He didn’t let Ichigo keep him pressed up against the wall though, quickly switching their positions to push the smaller man into the wall instead. His mind was reeling, not entirely caught up to the fact that he was kissing Ichigo.
“Fuck…” Ichigo breathed against Renji’s lips. He all but melted against the wall, only putting in the effort to stay standing. Otherwise, he let the other man pin him as firmly as he wanted to. His hands came up to run firmly up Renji’s sides and he shivered upon feeling the cut muscles beneath the fabric of his shihakusho. “You’re so damn sexy,” he groaned, his hips pressing forward a bit without conscious thought.
Renji gripped the other man’s hips to pull him closer, hissing softly as they pressed together. “Shit, Ichigo…” he exhaled. “Can’t believe - I mean - are you - are you even… is this just you experimenting, or…?”
Ichigo let out a rather helpless sound, his mind and body quickly being taken over by pleasure. “Are you - really trying to have this conversation right now?” he nearly growled, though his tone wasn’t nearly aggressive enough to be considered forceful.
With a breathless laugh, Renji reluctantly pulled back from his lips, just enough to meet amber eyes. “Just… trying to figure out what you want from this…”
Ichigo’s hands gripped Renji’s kosode over where he had been touching him and he otherwise sagged against the wall, so incredibly turned on but resigned to the fact that Renji was trying to get him to respond. “I don’t know for sure,” he admitted. “But I do know I want you. Is that enough for you?”
“Yeah,” Renji agreed. “Fuck it. Just - just tell me if I do anything you don’t like,” he ordered in a rough voice, and then yanked Ichigo close to kiss him eagerly once again. He didn’t like the idea of potentially sabotaging whatever this was by talking too much, but he hated the idea of accidentally hurting one of them even more. Still, with what he’d needed to say out of the way, he wrapped his hands around Ichigo’s thighs and lifted him up, deepening their kisses with a low groan.
Ichigo was quickly losing the ability to think, hot arousal coursing through him with every sound Renji uttered. A fleeting, but important realization crossed his mind, and he forced himself to turn away from the other’s assertive mouth. “Renji - just - if you want to… I mean - if we… go all the way, it’ll be - it’ll be my first time with a guy, so… just so you know,” he informed him, his voice breathy and trembling.
“Fucking hell, Ichigo,” Renji practically whined, shivering with desire. That shouldn’t be more of a turn on. It really shouldn’t. He wasn’t even normally a possessive person, but the thought of being the first to see Ichigo like that was undeniably alluring. “Is that - I - do you… would you want that?” he rasped back.
The pulse of heat that washed over Ichigo answered for him, and he nodded. “I mean - if - if you want. I know - I just got here and all, but -” He cut himself off before he started rambling, knowing he would say too much. He couldn’t admit that he’d been fantasizing about his friends, and even his enemies, if he was completely honest. So, he concluded with, “But if you want, y-yeah.”
Renji clearly felt the little shiver that ran through Ichigo at the thought and he only hesitated for a few moments before carrying him over to the bed. He fell down onto his futon, pulling Ichigo on top of him with a smirk on his lips. “What part of this,” he punctuated his words with a roll of his hips, “Makes you think I wouldn’t want to?”
“Fuck,” Ichigo groaned, nearly collapsing completely on Renji’s chest when he pressed up against him that way. It really was impossible to miss just how turned on the other man was, and his clear desire only drove Ichigo’s thoughts further from his mind. There wasn’t anything to worry about anyway. Obviously Renji wanted this, and so did he, and that was all Ichigo needed.
Renji tugged Ichigo’s kosode and shitagi from his hakama, shoving them off of the other man’s shoulders to bare his chest and arms. He leaned up to kiss him again, then his lips trailed along the ginger’s cheek to the hinge of his jaw, where he nipped him lightly. His hands grabbed at lithe muscles in the smaller man’s back as he continued peppering kisses down the side of Ichigo’s neck.
The amount of raw pleasure that was running through Ichigo’s blood had him completely overwhelmed. He had never been this turned on in his life. He’d had orgasms that didn’t feel this good. No fantasy - no amount of faking it - could compare to having Renji’s mouth and hands on him. He let out a humiliating, strangled whine when the other man nipped at his jaw, his hips rutting against the body below him without his consent. “Fuck - Renji -” His words cut off with his thoughts. He didn’t know what he was going to say anyway. As much as he wanted to touch and kiss and reciprocate every one of Renji’s actions, he couldn’t seem to sort through the way this man made him feel.
Renji sucked a bruise into the pale skin of Ichigo’s throat and ordered in a low voice, “Touch me. However you want… want you so fucking bad, Ichi…” He’d never truly stopped to consider what it would be like to be with the other man, if only because he’d so thoroughly convinced himself it would never happen. Now that it was, he could hardly think. It was only for the sake of at least one of them being somewhat functional that he was able to at all.
Ichigo didn’t know how he was holding back, if he was honest. The slight pain of Renji marking his neck had him shaking badly, tense as he stopped himself from moving against the other man in response to the sensations that were overtaking him. When Renji told him to touch him - however he wanted to - Ichigo didn’t know what to do. His mind was so clouded over with overwhelming arousal that he didn’t think he was able to want, and he definitely didn’t feel like he could act on it. He would just end up even more desperate than he already was. “If you want me…” he murmured, his voice quiet as he forced it up from his throat, “Please just have me… I want to - to touch you, but I’m just so fucking turned on right now… can’t wait.”
“You can,” Renji murmured back to him firmly, his voice low and husky. “We’ve got all afternoon… and tonight… So just be patient for me, alright?” He moved one hand to the tie of Ichigo’s hakama and loosened that as well, wanting to see him fully bare.
Ichigo didn't even know what patience was at the moment, especially with Renji sliding his hakama down his legs and coaxing him to shift just enough for him to take them off entirely. So now here he was, completely naked on top of his friend who was apparently determined to torture him. “What do you want? You just want me to take your clothes off? I'll do whatever you want - I just need this - so fucking bad,” he whined, tense and waiting for more specific direction, because he honestly couldn't get his mind to latch onto any particular thing he should do.
“Ohh,” Renji said softly, his eyes lighting up as he realized Ichigo actually wanted him to direct him. He rolled them both and pinned Ichigo to the futon with a smirk, then gripped the other man’s hands and tugged them above his head. Pressing them down against the pillow, he ordered, “Stay. Don’t move until I tell you to.”
Ichigo couldn't decide whether he should be confused, turned on, or worried, and the resulting mixture of uncertain emotions had his eyes locked onto Renji's own. “O-Okay. What - you're not - just going to leave me here like this, are you?” he asked. With how seemingly sadistic the other man was, not allowing him any relief when he was obviously already suffering, it wasn't outside the realm of possibility.
Renji’s face softened immediately and he shook his head. “Never,” he promised. “And again… you can tell me if you don’t like something, yeah? I want you to tell me if you don’t like something.”
The way Renji's expression shifted at his concern had Ichigo's worries melting away - and had him melting into the blankets beneath him. “Right - yeah - I will… I'm - I'm fine” - other than being turned on to an impossible degree - “just… before you do whatever you're going to do… kiss me again? Please?” he requested, craving the addictive sensation of the other man claiming his mouth.
Lips curving into a slow smile, Renji leaned down to do just that. He caught Ichigo's mouth in a soft kiss that quickly deepened, increasing in intensity until he was nipping at the other man's lips and swallowing his shuddering moans. He wanted to take his time with him, but the other man was not making it easy on him.
Ichigo was a mess within moments of Renji’s lips touching his again. It was entirely euphoric, feeling the other man like this. The only problem was that the larger man was hovering over him just far enough away that no matter how much he shifted beneath him, he would have to arch his back to an uncomfortable degree to reach him. “Fuck - please - please - why are you fucking teasing me like this?” he whined against Renji’s mouth, very nearly sobbing pathetically on his next rough exhale.
“Because you look so irresistible when you're desperate,” Renji murmured back, lips just barely grazing Ichigo's own while he spoke. Then he sat up and back, settling on the other man's thighs just out of reach. With a smirk he began to strip off his own shihakusho with what was likely agonizing slowness.
As soon as the lines of Renji’s tattoos began coming into view, Ichigo’s eyes widened and his heart began to pound so hard and fast he swore it was going to fly right out of his chest. Yes, he was definitely gay, and Renji was definitely one of the sexiest people he’d ever seen. The desperation that the other man was apparently having fun eliciting was only getting worse, soft whimpers leaving Ichigo’s lips without his notice. All he was really able to notice was the skin that was being revealed to him, jagged black tattoos drawing his eyes from Renji’s chest down to his hard abs. “Fuck,” he breathed.
Ichigo’s hands twitched above his head, but he clenched them into tight fists to keep from moving them. If Renji took too much longer, he wasn’t going to have much choice. Seconds felt like long minutes, and of course the lieutenant had no qualms about taking his sweet time taking off his clothes. Ichigo was a tense mess, and he had to do something. What was Renji really going to do if he moved anyway? At this rate, all he needed was a few seconds to get the relief he craved. So, a quick decision had one of his hands going down to touch himself, a loud moan of relief surfacing as soon as contact was made.
Quicker than the other man had time to react to, Renji grabbed Ichigo’s hand and dragged it back up above his head, pinning it there with a growl. “I told you not to move,” he said dangerously. Auburn eyes glinting with fire, he cast them across the bed until he found one of their discarded obis. “If you’re incapable of listening… I can always just prevent you from being able to disobey me,” he decided in a voice so rough it was nearly a growl.
Ichigo actually did sob this time when his hand was wrenched away. He flexed his fingers in and out of fists, his wrists pinned to the pillow. Reasonably, he knew he could fight Renji off of him, but he was entirely too worked up, distracted, and borderline distressed to do anything so drastic. His breathing was labored, his chest heaving with every inhale, and he didn’t realize tears were gathering in his eyes until his vision was blurring. It was highly temporary, as they quickly leaked from the corners of his eyes, and he turned to bury his face half in the pillow beneath his head, his face flushing even more as humiliation set in. Why the hell was he crying anyway? It was ridiculous how much… everything he was feeling, and it was overwhelming in a way nothing else ever had been in his life, so he supposed tears were his body’s last resort in trying to process it all.
“Fuck…” Renji groaned heavily when he saw the tears in the other man’s eyes, torn between arousal and slight concern. It wasn’t his fault that Ichigo looked so gorgeous when he was crying in frustration. Still, he decided he’d pushed the other man more than enough for now, leaning down over him more to press them together from chest to hip. “You look so fucking perfect like this,” Renji murmured scant inches from Ichigo’s lips. “So desperate… You need it? Make yourself come, baby.”
It took quite literally a few seconds for Ichigo to obey that command, and his climax was so intense he swore he blacked out for several moments. Even when he knew he should have been recovering, he couldn’t get a full breath, his body still trembling uncontrollably in the aftermath. When he tried to speak, only piteous whimpers came up from his throat, and he was vaguely aware that his hair near his ears was wet with more tears that had fallen without his notice. Nothing had ever felt that good - good enough to have his entire body tingling and weightless, but oddly heavy at the same time. He didn’t have the mental energy to try to figure out what was going on right now, so he just tried to focus on Renji’s face, his ragged breaths washing over the other man’s lips.
Renji hadn’t looked away from the other man, watching him fall apart with rapt attention and trying valiantly to ignore his own growing need. He released Ichigo’s wrists, rubbing them gently for a few moments before moving to wipe away the tears streaking the other man’s face. “You did so well,” he murmured to him, and then leaned down to pepper Ichigo’s cheeks and lips with light, fleeting kisses, giving him a chance to calm down a bit. “Such a good boy for me…”
Ichigo didn’t know why Renji’s actions and words settled him the way they did, allowing him to relax into the blankets as his slight shaking slowly ceased. It was still a while before his breathing began to level out, but when it did, he took a deep breath, finally completely melting under Renji’s weight. “Fuck…” he exhaled out the word, his eyes falling shut.
Renji chuckled softly and pressed another light kiss to Ichigo’s lips. Seeing the other man like this - for him - was both adorable and ridiculously satisfying. He hadn’t known what he was getting himself into, clearly. Because all Renji could think about now was how gorgeous Ichigo looked and how much he wanted to have him in his bed like this all the time now. With a soft sigh, he relaxed against Ichigo’s chest a bit, glad that the other man only seemed content to have his weight pressing down on him.
It took another many minutes for Ichigo to feel like he could speak, but instead of doing that, as soon as he felt like he was able to, he lifted his arms from where they were still resting above his head and wrapped them around Renji’s shoulders, humming contentedly as he hugged him. “Fuck, that was good,” he whispered. One of his hands found Renji’s hair and began stroking down the ponytail. “Only thing that would’ve made it better is if you’d taken your hair down,” he added with a chuckle.
Renji grinned back at him and reached up to tug the tie free from his long hair, letting it fall to curtain around his shoulders. “All you had to do was ask,” he teased. “You like my hair?”
Ichigo laughed at the first comment. “Like I could've asked for anything. Asking means talking, and I don't think I could have gotten out a full sentence if I tried.” His hand followed the length of Renji's hair down and around his shoulder, his fingers running through the smooth strands. “Course I like your hair. Who wouldn't like your hair?”
Renji hummed and leaned into his touch a bit. “Feels nice,” he murmured with a pleased sigh. “Can play with it… whenever you want… Just don’t pull it.”
Ichigo smirked, closing his fingers around a handful of hair when he went back up to the roots to begin carding through it again. “Why not?” he asked playfully.
Renji snarled and knocked Ichigo’s hands away, capturing both of his wrists once more. His scalp was still stinging a bit and he glared down at the other man. “Because it hurts and I can’t promise not to hurt you in return,” he hissed back at him.
Ichigo's eyes widened and this time he relented immediately. “O-Okay… Sorry,” he murmured. The last thing he wanted to do was ruin everything he had so quickly gained with Renji.
Releasing his wrists, Renji leaned down to kiss him softly, assuring him that he wasn’t upset. “It’s fine, I’m just not all that fond of pain,” he murmured. “So just be aware there are consequences to being a brat…” he added with a chuckle.
Ichigo's first impulse was to be defensive about being called a brat, but… well, Renji wasn't wrong. Instead, he was blurting out without any thought at all, “But you look so hot, all beat up and bloody…”
Renji smirked dangerously. “Don’t start something you can’t finish, Ichigo.”
“You really think you could give me a challenge?” Ichigo growled, a bit of gold lighting up the amber of his irises.
A shiver of excitement raced down Renji’s spine and he gave Ichigo a wide grin in response. The other man unquestionably had more reiatsu, but he was physically stronger and also extremely motivated not to lose. “Try me.”