Chapter Text
Welcome to exposition central!
~~~~~
Song rec: The Knack (mother mother)
In the school of love (school of love)
I was all mixed up (all mixed up)
I didn't get it, get it, get it, yeah
I wasn't quick to pick it up
In the race of romance
I was always coming in last
I was tripping, tripping, tripping out
On the rocky little path
In the art of the whisper
I couldn't paint such a picture
~1~
“Hmm.”
Damian looks at his notebook, scanning his research. Combining what the internet has provided on information in ideal romantic partners and likable traits for introducing a significant other to family, along with some of his own preferences, she is statistically the best option.
“Uh— did you need something?...”
Damian nods to himself, but she seems to interpret the nod as directed at her, and waits for his request, smiling kindly. Yes, the saps at home will surely be pleased.
“Hm. Yes, you will do.”
“Oh! Uhm… what?”
It all started as most things do at the manor; somebody being annoying. And by somebody, he means everybody.
Damian’s family are pestering him to be more of a normal teenager. And they are pestering hard. He doesn’t want to be more of a normal teenager. The average teens he observes at school are brainless savages. But his family is getting so annoying about it he’d do almost anything to get them to shut up.
They have been complete lunatics about it. Trying to drag him inane places like mall arcades and movie theaters. They have a theater. In their house. Why would he need to go to a public theater for any reason?
They keep trying to introduce him to ‘fun teen stuff’ and no, he isn’t being stubborn. He just isn’t interested. And they keep insisting he make more friends and bring them around, even if they aren’t super close friends. But Damian would rather saw off his left leg than be friends with any of the brainless imbeciles at Gotham Academy. (Besides Jon, of course, who is waiting for him in the hall. And surely listening in to his dealings with his classmate.)
So yeah. He’d do just about anything to get his family to politely, as they say, fuck off.
Then Marinette Dupain-Cheng transfers to his school. She’s intelligent, quiet, respectful of his boundaries, not nosey, and most importantly of all, doesn’t seem to give two shits about his family name. He tried to tell her to move from his table at lunch, threatening with his name, and she just looked at him and asked, “Am I supposed to care?” With the most tired look on her face.
He begrudgingly respects that. And she is not a complete idiot from what he’s observed.
Marinette Dupain-Cheng has perfect grades, is working on a campaign for class president despite having only recently just transferred to Gotham Academy, she regularly helps other students with their own work, and is respectful but not a pushover. She is an international transfer into the Gotham Academy business program. She also, he’s observed, brings petitions and such to the attention of fellow students. The most recent being one petitioning for the conversion of a local animal pound into a no-kill shelter. She is, by all means, a model not-citizen.
(Her English is also impeccable for someone from France. He has also heard her speaking in Mandarin to another exchange student.)
Damian sees this whole ‘normal teen behavior’ thing as a point system. It seems accurate from what he can tell. Some things, like threatening to stab his teacher, are negative points. And some things are positive points, like making friends or going to the arcade. But some things are worth more points than other things. Going to the arcade is less annoying than making friends, but it also has fewer points.
So, Damian can theoretically just do a few annoying ‘normal teen things’ that are very high in points, and do less in the long run. He has observed his fellow high school students to determine what they consider most valuable and important at this age, as well as consulting the internet about ‘the best parts of high school’ to determine the things with the top number of teenager points.
He has successfully determined that there is one thing that seems to be most obsessed over, and should distract his family from their insistences for as long as possible.
Damian straightens his posture, even though it was already perfect, and looks his classmate in the eye with as much sincerity and importance as he can muster when he’s about to do something so incredibly ridiculous just for some damn peace at home.
His family want normal teen behavior? Fine. He’ll bring a girlfriend home.
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
He hears Jon hacking and choking in the hallway.
~1~
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
Marinette blinks. Somebody in the hallway seems to have started having an asthma attack, and all she can muster is a single thought. Same.
Because she did not expect that. Like. At all.
Marinette transferred to Gotham Academy not long after her 16th birthday. She had saved for months, taking commissions and working rather than hanging out with her friends, so that she’d have enough money for schooling abroad.
Well. Not that there were many times hanging with her ‘friends’ would have been worth it. She was hardly invited out by her classmates anyway. Nino would try his best, as would Alex and Kim, but she’d turn them down. She had to work.
Some people, however, would hang out with her anyway. It was confusing at first— but Kagami and Chloe would ask her to hang out with them, she’d say she was busy, and then they’d say ‘okay, then we’ll hang out with you.’
And they would come over. And basically just loiter in her room doing whatever while she worked.
Something about it made her feel warm. It was a different kind of having friends, a different kind of hanging out— Marinette is so used to always having to do something. She really can’t remember many times her and Alya really just. Hung around each other. Each doing their own thing, but with company. Quality time.
Kagami and Chloe would bicker over their respective fencing and fashion magazines. And would seamlessly manage to pull Marinette into the conversation, till she’d suddenly find herself finishing the stitching in her latest work— whilst also laughing uproariously at Chloe throwing a hissy fit over the shoes one of the fencers is wearing to their awards ceremony.
That’s really what convinced her to go through with the transfer. She felt that she’d now have friends that would still be her friends when she wasn’t physically with them. She was right. They FaceTime her nearly every day.
Marinette has enough experience in fashion to have her name present, but a company is more than just that. So she’d applied for Gotham Academy’s renowned business magnet program, and had been accepted and informed she could make the switch mid quarter. She had expected to have to wait till next year, or at least next semester, but no. They informed her that she can come in the middle of her first quarter, and start when second quarter begins.
Apparently, when school is constantly interrupted by destruction from Villain attacks, they learn to be pretty flexible with letting transfers and otherwise start as soon as they can.
Her parents had been ecstatic. There had been a lot of tears, and an excessive amount of tasers and pepper spray gifted to her that she couldn’t even bring on the plane anyway.
So she’d transferred, ecstatic to admire the unique architecture of Gotham and learn how to best manage her business.
Marinette was placed with a very kind host family who had made her feel incredibly welcome, a lovely couple with some… interesting tastes in pets. She isn’t sure it’s legal to keep hyenas, but she also doubts you’d find a single home in Gotham without something illegal happening inside.
Her first few weeks at Gotham academy have been optimistically smooth sailing. The teens of Gotham are quite a bit more on-guard than she’s used to, but they are refreshingly honest. Brutally so. Even the ones who speak in the manner of ‘rich people insult’ where they give backhanded compliments are at least being truthful about their opinions. The people here are blunt and she appreciates it more than anything else.
For a bit they are intrigued by her nationality, romanticized as Paris is in many parts of the world, but it eventually wears off and they treat her as any other student. Marinette believes she is liked well enough, in that special Gotham way where people show that they like you through casual teasing insults and weird nicknames. Her classes soon realize they can come to her for help with certain subjects, and they do. It takes her a bit to realize that ‘smart ass’ is something like a term of endearment here, but now she bears the rough nickname with pride.
She likes it here. She didn’t expect to— Marinette was sure she’d spend every day of her stay in paranoia and gloom, but she actually enjoys Gotham. She doesn’t even mind the rogue attacks. It’s weirdly nice to be caught in attacks and not be one of the people responsible for solving the whole thing. Being allowed to just sit back and be a civilian while the bats save the day soothes something in her.
(Of course, she can’t help herself from helping in civilian ways. Leading people to safety and calming panicked strangers is familiar territory, and she feels helpful.)
Naturally, she often has to use Kaalki to make quick trips to Paris to wrangle Hawkmoth's latest fashion disaster of an Akuma. She’s taken to wearing the glasses near constantly, in their new form as a pair of subtle wire-rims, and her classmates just assume she needs them for her vision. Akumas happen too often for her to be dealing with a glasses case, they disappear with the rest of her stuff when she’s ladybug, and they don’t affect her vision. So she regularly portals over to home sweet home to take care of business. And being able to return to Gotham after the fight and get frustrated? Upset? Being able to go back and feel things about the attack? Oh, it is Heaven.
And honestly, it’s somehow easier to get to the battles from across the country. After many long talks with her parents and quite a few doctors appointments, Marinette acquired an anxiety diagnosis a while ago. At GA, she can subtly tell her teachers she feels an anxiety or panic attack building and usually be excused for a bit without question. But back at Dupont, when she originally got her diagnosis the previous year and after informing her teachers, Ms.Bustier would insist Marinette stay in the class because, surely, being around her friends would make her feel better. Despite Marinette’s protests.
It comes with the weird boon of Marinette swiftly learning how to instantly make herself cry at the drop of a hat, so she’s returning to class with some evidence of being upset. It’s a weird contrast, going from living in Paris where you have to make sure you never slip up and cry, to her relying on the ability to burst into sobs at will. She often wonders if she could out-fake cry Lila at this point.
She’s learning a lot of strange skills since coming to America
And if Marinette returns from an Akuma fight to actually take a few minutes to be upset and have a freak out, well— she didn’t get the diagnosis for nothing. Her reason for leaving is usually fake, but the disorder very much isn’t.
Speaking of anxiety inducing!
Marinette, now possessing the miracle box and solely responsible for its safety, regularly lets the kwami run around her room, outside the miracle box, and so she has them to talk to while she works on homework or commissions. It’s a risk, but they seem so happy to explore!
Her friends, Chloe and Kagami, (and recently Luka has been joining them) call her every day. Her parents call her every night. Nobody from DuPont harasses her with texts because she changed her number. She gets friendly texts from people at school about assignments and meeting times for homework help. She isn’t super close with any of them, it’s all impersonal conversations, but they don’t ask her why she did something Marinette knows she didn’t do. Knows that Lila claimed she did. It's practically been a dream, and it’s only been a month.
Which is why Marinette isn’t too surprised that some crazy shit is finally happening.
Damian Wayne is in half her classes. Second, third, and fifth. He is extremely introverted from what Marinette’s observed, cold to others, and not the most socially aware. She’s caught him glancing her way pensively a few times, seeming deep in thought.
When she’d first got here, Wayne had tried to ‘ convince’ her to leave the only unoccupied table in the cafeteria. Mentioned his family name. Marinette was so exhausted, still getting onto her new sleep schedule and having spent the last few days unpacking, and so over people using this-or-that name to get things (ahem, Lila) that she’d just looked at him with all the desperate exhaustion in her, riding that wave of apathy and rudely asked if she should care.
She freaked out internally afterwards, damn near hyperventilated at the table (only hanging on because of years of living under Hawkmoth), but Marinette could have sworn she saw amusement in his eyes as he relented and sat down a couple feet away to eat in silence.
Apparently, rude is a trait he likes in people, and those pensive stares were more than she thought, because here he is asking her out.
They haven’t even had a real conversation before, she thinks as she stares incredulously at the boy. He does not falter with his piercing stare.
Maybe he’s actually shy? And it just comes off as cold? Chloe and Kagami both have some serious cases of resting bitchface. Maybe that’s just the kind of people Marinette attracts.
Emphasis on attracts, apparently.
But if he was shy, would he be asking her out so directly? Is this a prank? Her classmates have only told her that Damian Wayne hates everyone except for that guy she sees sitting with him at lunch. Is she over-thinking? Catastrophizing?
Marinette doesn’t know anything any more.
He clears his throat, shuffling minutely, and suddenly looking almost nervous. Okay, wow. She didn’t expect that. Nobody is nervous around her. Marinette is the mess. She’s the flustered one. She’s the one who goes into an irrational panic and makes a 20 step plan for how to just speak with her past crush. Nobody get’s fluttery crushes on Marinette Dupain-Cheng.
Oh, god– his cheeks pink just the slightest and oh no. If he’s shy and this is his first attempt she’s seen at attempting to make a connection to someone she’s gotta let him down as softly as possible.
…
Marinette blinks.
Actually. Ya know what?
She thinks to herself, wincing at the memories of her obsessive Adrien crush— the stalker maps and weird shit she did all the time to try and get close to him. Only for him to turn out to not be the kind of person she’d want to spend her life with. She had him on a pedestal so high, she couldn’t even speak to him, and left every blubbered conversation feeling incredibly insecure and like a huge idiot. Chloe and Kagami’s lecture about doing something impulsive for once and moving on, Chloe’s lengthy debate on the pros and cons of dating American guys and girls. It was mostly all teasing, but…
…If she ends up not liking him, she can just break up with him, right? People do that all the time. Go out with people they don’t know well, and if it doesn't work, just break up. And they can stay friends even! It couldn't hurt to try. Maybe before the panic really sets it and she freaks the fuck out, embarrassing herself publicly.
Marinette thinks of her crazy ass life. This is hardly the weirdest thing to happen to her. It doesn’t even make the top 50.
Yeah.
This might as well happen.
“Sure.”
Oh my god she actually said that.
Wayne’s face takes on an expression that looks victorious and pleasantly surprised. If she’s reading that right. He’s kind of hard to read. The boy doesn’t exactly smile, but she gets the impression that he is pleased with her response. Marinette finds it hard to regret her impulsive answer when, for the first that she’s seen, he looks almost happy. Maybe she was right— he’s just a bit shy and gave asking out his crush a shot, which is so much braver than she had ever been with her crush on Adrien.
He nods. “Good. Our relationship shall begin tomorrow. If it is successful through to the end of the week, I will ask you to meet my family.”
Marinette feels her heart stutter.
…
…
…
She nods stiffly. “Hm. Okay,” she squeaks out.
Damian Wayne turns and leaves the nearly empty fifth-period classroom. Marinette just stands there, stunned. Three days and if that is successful she will be at ‘meeting-the-family’ stage. Is moving this fast a Gotham thing? An American thing? Or a rich people thing? Oh my god, Marinette doesn’t have any clue why she just did that.
Yeah.
This might as well happen.