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It all started and ended with Nico di Angelo.
Percy was almost ashamed that it had taken him three loops to figure that one out.
It ended when Nico di Angelo met him and Annabeth by the bonfire at Camp Half-Blood.
"You're cute, but you're not my type," He would say, high-five Annabeth, and turn back.
He would fall through the Earth as if they hadn't stopped Gaia, he would close his eyes, and open them again on that hill by Epirus, where Nico was tying himself to that gigantic statue, and it would begin again.
"Yeah, well," he said again, "not giving people a second thought... that can be dangerous."
"So I've heard," Percy said tiredly. It was the fifth time he had heard Nico say this, and maybe it was the fact that he would have to fight Polybotes, the other giants, and Gaia just as many times, but he was about to explode. "Nico, I just... wish things were different between us."
Nico raised an eyebrow.
"What do you mean?" Nico asked. Percy debated telling him everything, asking for his help in this loop, but when he had tried with Annabeth on his second loop she had asked him why he was spouting gibberish.
"There's something going on with me," Percy said. "And I know things, things that people are hiding, and—"
"You're panicking," Nico said. He awkwardly raised his hand and touched his back. "Tartarus was hard on you, wasn't it?"
Tartarus. From his perspective, he had left Tartarus weeks ago. No, the real hell was repeating these few days over and over, starting and ending with Nico.
"You can be honest, Nico," he said seriously. "Did you give up on me?"
Was the loop caused by Nico getting over his crush on him? Was he desperate enough to make his friend keep it a while longer if only to break the loop?
"No," Nico said back. "I always held on to hope that you were alive... both you and Annabeth."
He couldn't. He was in love with his girlfriend (even if having the same conversations with her over and over for the past four or so weeks was maddening). It wouldn't be fair to lead Nico on.
Wait.
Nico had responded differently.
"I know you're busy," Percy said experimentally. "But... do you mind if I help you with the statue... I need to keep myself busy or I'll explode."
The first two loops, he had thought he had been brought back to change something, but whenever he tried to prevent Jason from getting hurt in Ithaca, or Leo from sacrificing himself, something would happen that would rerail everything back to how it should be.
On the third loop, he had tried to remain as consistent to the original timeline as he could.
Either way, he was always brought back to this moment.
Nico looked dubious as he looked behind him, probably where Annabeth was.
"Okay, just... don't overwork yourself, alright?" he said, worried.
Percy couldn't help himself. He grinned and hugged Nico.
"Thank you Nico, you're a true friend!"
He finally could do something different! Maybe Nico was the answer. He didn't need to lead him on. Just be a better friend this time around.
"Pe-Percy!" Nico stuttered. "T-too close!"
"Sorry, sorry," Percy apologized. He knelt down and picked up the rope. "Well, where should I tie this?"
"Um... the ankle..." he said hesitantly. Percy got to work.
"Say Nico, about what we were talking earlier," he said as he began doing his best sailor knot around the statue. "Bob made me realize... I've been kind of a shitty friend, haven't I?"
"I don't need your gratitude Percy," Nico grumbled. Percy's eyes widened. That was way too close to what Nico had said the last three times. "After you're done with that, you can—"
"This is not about gratitude!" Percy interrupted. "This is about me, changing for the better!"
This was about Nico, it had to be. He couldn't allow things to go the same way again.
"You're fine as you are," Nico tried, but Percy shook his head.
"I'm not fine." He wouldn't be until he escaped the loops. "Just... let me do this for you. Let me try and be your friend."
"What do you want to do?"
"Just... call you," Percy said. "Let me check on you as you're travelling."
"Do you think I can't do this?" Nico frowned. "Do you doubt my powers?"
"I know you can do this." He had done so four times already. "But... we can talk, I can tell you about what goes on here, and you can tell me if Coach Hedge is being a pain."
"Why?" Nico asked.
"Because we should be friends," Percy said, feeling a new conviction. "And maybe it's my fault we're not, but I want to be there for you now."
Nico sighed in defeat.
"I may be sleeping when you call," he warned.
"That's okay, I'll keep trying," Percy said. He took Nico's wrist and looked at his clock. Nico blushed. "I'll call everyday, at this hour, so don't go changing it and forgetting."
"I... I won't?" Nico tried. Percy nodded, satisfied.
"Talk to you tomorrow, Nico," he said, smiling satisfied. Nico looked utterly confused as he turned and left.
If nothing else, he would enjoy the variety of the talks this loop.
"I still would check to make sure how they are made," Percy said, smiling. "I mean, aren't they right next to the Brits? They had to have known what 'farturas' sounded like!"
Nico snorted and rolled his eyes. The image shimmered a bit as Percy tossed another drachma.
"I honestly don't understand my father," Nico said through the somewhat grainy image of the Iris message. "He said he wanted me to be happy, but... why act like he doesn't care all these years, then?"
"Sounds like someone I know," Percy teased back. It was so nice to talk to Nico. Right now, his life seemed like a huge stage play where Percy couldn't drift away from the script, no matter what he tried, the show would go as expected.
Except for Nico. This was the first time he got to talk to him like this, and the novelty was almost addicting.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Nico asked, a frown on his face. Percy found it adorable. He couldn't understand how anyone could see Nico, know Nico, and still think of him as scary or off-putting.
"I mean you're a nice guy," Percy said simply. "People just don't bother to look deeper because they're dumb."
Nico blushed and looked down. Now that Percy was aware of his crush, he tended to notice those things.
"I'll let my father know you think he's a nice guy, then." He smirked. Percy laughed.
Then his body started itching. He sighed. The feeling usually meant he was needed somewhere to keep the timeline on track.
"I need to go, I think I have some plans with Annabeth," he said. Was this the day he spent with Annabeth on Mykonos, or had that already happened this loop? It was starting to all blur together, and that worried him. "See you tomorrow?"
Nico's expression turned completely neutral as he shook his head.
"Probably not, I'll be jumping once I meet back with Reyna and coach Hedge," he said, voice emotionless. "That whole warning about wolves bothers me."
"Okay, but you know I'll still try, right?"
"Yeah... I'll see you when I see you, I guess," Nico said. "Take care, Percy."
"You, too," he managed to say before Nico ran his hand through the image, dissolving it.
Percy sighed. Things would be so much easier if Nico wasn't crushing on him... or if he could reciprocate it.
He shook his head. That didn't matter right now. Nico and him would be closer this loop. His getting over his feelings would not break that.
He stood up and followed the itch to the next event.
They fought Polybotes, reached Athens, he and Annabeth bled again, and Leo died again. Nothing changed on this fourth loop.
Nico had stopped accepting IMs after their last conversation, too.
Had he made a mistake mentioning Annabeth? Or had it been an event that caused him to lose all contact after Portugal?
Either way Percy awaited anxiously the last few minutes of this loop.
"I talked with Reyna," Annabeth said, eyes shining. "She agreed! We can have an apartment in New Rome while we go to college! No need to serve in the Legion!"
Percy smiled uneasily. Thinking about the future meant nothing if he couldn't break out of the loops.
"Sounds... sounds great, Wise Girl," he said. He turned to look at Nico, who had his back to them.
Last four times, it was him cheering that brought him over. And his changes seemed to only affect Nico's behavior.
Maybe if he didn't come out to them, the loops would end?
"You're not happy?" Annabeth asked, frowning.
Percy's eyes widened. Had he done it? Annabeth was finally reacting to his behavior.
"Not at all!" He said quickly, loudly. "It's just... I'm going to miss this?"
"Percy?" Nico's voice sounded behind him. Percy's back straightened and he looked back. Nico looked at him strangely, almost unsure.
Percy had never been more afraid.
"Nico! Hi!" He said amiably. "Sorry if I bothered you, Annabeth was just telling me about us going to college in New Rome," he said. Annabeth pressed her lips, but said nothing, unlike last time.
Nico nodded, and smiled at him. The gesture was oddly melancholic compared to the satisfied expression he had on past loops.
"I hope you guys are happy," he said, and Percy knew he meant it. "When we last met, you said it was your fault we weren't friends."
"Because it was," Percy said. Nico shook his head.
"It was at least as much my fault as yours," Nico said, eyes sad. "But I've given up now."
"Given up?" Percy asked.
"Ever since we met, I've hated what I am, who I am," Nico continued. "And I guess that's the reason why I avoided you, because you were a constant reminder of that."
"I'm sorry, Nico." Percy didn't know what else to say.
"It's not your fault I like boys, Percy," Nico whispered. "But now... I can move on. So thanks, for being my friend even when I made it so difficult."
"You liked...?" He said, already knowing the answer.
Nico nodded.
"Pretty pathetic, huh?" Nico said. "See you guys around... or not."
Percy's heart was breaking. It couldn't end like this. The Nico of the other loops had been satisfied leaving him behind and moving on, but this Nico, the Nico he had fought so hard to connect with, seemed devastated.
He was still holding hands with Annabeth, he couldn't go after Nico as he walked towards the infirmary.
He almost felt relieved when the ground opened up, and he found himself on Epirus once again.
He stopped keeping count after the seventh loop.
He knew it had been more than ten now. Not quite enough to drive him mad, but enough that he had developed a hatred of every single event he was forced to take part of.
He hated going to Olympia, He hated fighting Polybotes with Kim and Jason, he hated fighting the Giants when they arrived at Athens. He had even grown to hate the trip to Mykonos with Annabeth.
But most of all, he hated Nico admitting he had liked him.
Because ever since that fourth loop, Nico had become his beacon of sanity. He had memorized his schedule to know when to call him to make their talks last longer, and each conversation remained varied and unique despite the loops. Yes, their last talk would always mention Hades, the bone chapel, and the wolves, but aside from that, talking to Nico was never the same, unlike with the Argo II's crew. Nico had become his oasis in the desert of sameness that had become his life.
And it broke him that every loop, Nico just looked more and more miserable when he came out and then gave up on him. It was as if Nico, on some level, remembered all their interactions, and Percy was making it harder on him giving up on him by making them grow closer, only for the inevitable finale.
"Yeah, well," Nico said, "not giving people a second thought... that can be dangerous."
"I know," Percy said sadly. "I've been thinking about you a lot... these past few days."
Through the loops, Nico had become important to him. Too important to make unhappy anymore.
This would be Percy's last changed loop. A loop where he made Nico di Angelo happy.
"What do you mean?" he said warily.
"I know this is wrong, because I am with Annabeth," Percy said, clenching his fists. Nothing could kill a relationship like monotony. Well, Percy had just experienced months of nothing but sameness. "But I've been... thinking about you... the way I used to think about Annabeth."
It wasn't a lie. As he got to know more and more about Nico (how witty he was, how funny he was, how kind and devoted he was) he had realized he wasn't seeking him out because he was a novelty. At least, not anymore. Nico was special, and he had been blind to not notice it before.
"Is this because of Bob?" Nico asked, voice shaky. "Y-you don't owe me anything, Percy Jackson, much less feelings."
"I owe it to myself to be honest about them," Percy said. "I like you, Nico. Even if you don't feel the same, I needed you to know, just once."
What brought this change may not have been healthy, but he had fallen in love with Nico di Angelo. And he would let himself love him one time before allowing himself to be slaved by the loops.
He would do the same inane things over and over, he would watch as the boy he loved got over him and sent him back in time without realizing it, and he would watch Nico be satisfied with that choice.
Because he loved Nico, and he never wanted to see him be that sad again.
"I... I never said I didn't feel the same!" Nico exclaimed, surprising even himself. "I just thought... it was impossible, so why bother, right?"
Percy smiled. Nico looked behind him and frowned a bit.
"But you're right, this is wrong," Nico continued. "You have a girlfriend, you just went through hell together. I... couldn't in good conscience make you break up with her."
"I'm not sure if I could either," Percy said. After all, Annabeth was not at fault for his feelings fading, and he doubted the loop would allow him to stray from her. "But... I'll try to find a good moment, because it wouldn't be fair to her."
"I... yeah, okay," Nico said, face crimson.
"Can I... call you? Keep in contact while you travel?" Percy asked. If this was to be the last time, he wanted as much interaction with Nico as possible.
Nico nodded.
"I'd like that," he whispered. Percy smiled and hugged him.
"See you soon, Nico." He said softly, squeezing him tight for a second before going away.
"What was that about?" Annabeth asked when he got closer.
"Just... thanking him, for everything."
By every definition of the word, what Percy was doing was borderline cheating.
He and Nico didn't exchange words of affection, but the way they looked at each other whenever Percy called, the smiles they shared, the plans they made together after the war (even if Percy knew they'd never happen), it was more like lovers than friends.
There was a change that surprised him. Annabeth decided to go to Mykonos with Piper instead of him, and lately she had been looking sadly at him. The others didn't seem to notice, too busy with their own dramas and personal problems.
The moment he realized the loop was growing looser was when Nico called him after Portugal.
"You stopped calling," Nico said, tone accusing. Percy saw him tired, with shaking hands. "Finally realized this was a mistake?"
"No," Percy said, eyes wide. "I just... you didn't answer me for days. I was worried but, then I thought that maybe you changed your mind."
"I've waited for you since I was eleven, Percy Jackson!" Nico shouted, glaring at him. "Don't you dare suggest I'd give up now that you're so close!"
"What happened to you?" he finally asked.
"Pirates, Hunters and... ghosts," Nico said, voice growing quieter. "I... I think I might have been in over my head, Percy, I feel so weak..."
"You are strong, Nico," he said. The itch came back, but it was mild. It almost felt like it didn't want to interrupt them. "I... we're reaching Athens soon, I can't stay but... talk to me. Vent until I absolutely have to go."
Nico bit his lip and then nodded. He lifted his hand. Percy's eyes widened when he noticed it was turning shadowy and transparent.
"I took a life, Percy..." Nico said quietly. "He wasn't a good person but... it was still a person..."
"I have, too," Percy admitted. "It feels awful, doesn't it? You feel so powerful at the moment, but then the reality of what you did—"
"Just comes crashing down," Nico finished for him. "So, you don't hate me?"
"I would never." Percy smiled. "It would be pretty hypocritical of me."
Nico gave him an uneasy smile.
The itch turned almost unbearable. He winced. He still had to ask about Nico's hand.
"We're here," he said. "Please be careful, and be okay I'll... I'll call you when we stop the Giants."
Nico didn't know he'll fly at mach speed towards camp soon after.
"Good luck," Nico said. "Maybe next time I'll be at camp."
Interestingly enough, there was no itch to kiss Annabeth when they reached the place where their parents' feud started.
"There's someone else, isn't it?" Annabeth asked quietly the next day by the hearth, as they helped with the wreck and the fallen.
Percy winced, but nodded all the same.
"I'm sorry Annabeth," he said. "You don't deserve this."
"I always knew," she said quietly. "Sometimes, when we were together, you would look like... like you wanted to be elsewhere."
Now Percy was confused. To him, maybe, as he had been crushing on Nico for about a month, but for Annabeth it had only started a week or so ago.
"I first noticed at the ranch," she said, voice detached. "He hated you, but you still fought for him, for his sake... Nico was your priority."
"Annabeth..." had it really been like that? Were his feelings not as new as he believed?
"When I saw you talk to him in Epirus, I asked every god willing to hear me for a signal, something to tell me that you loved me, and I saw you hug him so tenderly I... sorry, I'm rambling."
Percy tried to process what she was saying. Was it possible that Annabeth's prayer had reached someone after all? Could the loops have been because of that?
"I never wanted this to happen," Percy said. "But I can't say I'm sorry it happened. I... I think I love him, Wise Girl."
For Nico's happiness, he had been willing to face the loops without him. He would be willing to go through them again if it meant being with him.
"I know," she said. "And I think you know we can't stay together if you feel that way."
Percy nodded. His heart was breaking again. He had been stuck in the loops for so long that he had almost forgotten that he did love Annabeth.
"You're right," he held his hand out. "But you're important to me, Annabeth. Maybe not now but, someday in the future, I'd like it if we stayed friends."
Annabeth laughed and rubbed her eyes. She was a proud woman. She would never let him see her cry.
With her other hand, she shook his.
"You're dreaming if you think you'll get rid of me that easily, Seaweed Brain," she said. She gave a sad smile and looked behind him. "Now go, he's waiting for you."
He turned around, and sure enough, Nico was there, looking awkwardly between them.
"See you, Annabeth," he said, before letting go and running towards Nico.
The boy walked calmly and met him halfway, hugging him with as much force as he could muster.
"You look terrible," Nico said against his chest. Percy chuckled.
"Well, you're not the image of health right now either," he answered. "I missed you, Nico."
"Percy?" He said hesitantly. "I think I'm ready."
"Ready for what?" Percy asked curiously. On the back of his mind, he was preparing for the end of his best loop.
"To tell you that... I have a crush on you," he said. "But that I barely know the real you, and I want to do so."
"Well, I think I know you pretty well," Percy said. "And I'm certain that I'll stay with you as long as I can so you can get to know me."
He kissed Nico, not caring who would see them.
He expected the Earth to split open and go back to Epirus, but when he opened his eyes, Nico was still there, looking at him with a mix of embarrassment and wonder.
"I need to stay in the infirmary for a few days," Nico admitted. "I overused my Shadow Travel..."
Percy waited a few more seconds. Nothing. He was still in the present.
Was it over? He was still in the present?
Percy broke into a grin and squeezed Nico tighter, making him yelp.
"Percy!" Nico hissed, looking around. "Let me down!"
Percy twirled him around one last time for good measure before gently letting him on the ground.
Still nothing. With every passing second he became more confident.
The loop was broken.
"I'll go visit every day." He promised, realizing he still hadn't answered Nico. "We still need to do a lot of catching up, anyways."
Finally the future looked bright.
