Chapter Text
Tempering is not unique to the veneration of Eikons. An ideal can suffocate your will just as swiftly. Passion is an unbreakable bond.
A haze of smoke lingered in winding coils through the corridors of an ancient home. Dancing snakes rose from a bowl of smoldering juniper and anise; a quiet and languid sensation that paired with the hum of crickets. This temporary sanctuary was ill-prepared to host living souls among its cobblestone walls. These luxuries of eld had now belonged to the wilds, as it succumbed to devouring vines. Yet flickering in the window was a pulse of life. A fireplace was kindled to keep away the chill of night from this withered ruin, though 'ruin' was a word that didn't properly suit a place like this. Upon lavish elven decor, a fine layer of dust was all that suggested its age. A few cobwebs hung from gothic chandeliers, which clung to a modicum of aether that glowed faintly in the darkness. Perhaps life in this once opulent home was merely sleeping, present in the overgrowth that crept in from broken stained glass windows and old metal door frames left adjacent. Beyond one particular corridor, the shuffle of movement indicated at least one visitor as they adjusted their posture to wave away the ribbons of incense that lingered.
A raven-haired woman prodded at her ritualistic 'offering' with a small twig, blowing on the embers to stoke its life. A flickering warmth reflected on the pearlescent 'third eye' upon her forehead. Markings of red skin from adornments indicated that this was rarely exposed. She slipped a pair of fingers across the slight indentation on her skin out of habit. Then over her tired, fatigue-ridden eyelids as she leaned back against an old rust-colored divan.
This visitor was known to this world as Tanith fae Serpens. A name with another meaning in the reflection she originally hailed. A reflection of a world which was doomed to breathe its last if not for the efforts of the scions--or at least that was the memory fabricated upon waking here. For the short time she had regained consciousness, Tanith discerned that this was The First, yet pondered over everything she recalled in Ultima Thul as it felt like nothing more than a lucid dream.
The one sobering sensation she experienced in this moment was the lofty weight and warmth of another that rested gently in her lap. A man of absurd size and stature lay there, nearly unresponsive; like the dead, save for the subtle movement of his chest and warmth from his shoulders. Golden hair spilled over Tanith's legs, beautiful and delicate yet belonging to something--rather someone quite dangerous. She mused to herself while spotting a few remaining white feathers on the marble flooring, 'almost like a sin eater'.
No much worse than a sin eater.
With one hand warmed by a cup of tea, the other rested on the man's collarbone. Tanith took a sip and then returned it to the counter with an audible exhale. "We only have one candle of life to burn, is that true?" She cast her dark gray eyes downwards in gentle dismay, "...and you have far too many wicks, viator .
The taunt summoned life. The man roused slightly with half-lidded eyes and visible exhaustion. The first time they were ever this close was in the aftermath of Ala Mhigo. Yet he had taken his life knowing no satisfaction would exist beyond this moment. Blood-stained, crimson-petaled flowers flooded Tanith's vision as she closed her eyes, momentarily lost in the memory of a triumphant victory for Ala Mhigo. Recollecting the bitter sadness as she shouldered memories of Zenos yae Galvus alone. The red thread drew taut in her heart, and she held the blade close to sever it from his madness at last... yet she did not even dare fray its strands.
"Death escapes once more with the reason still unbeknownst to me." The former crowned prince spoke with a fatigued candor in his voice.
She had yet to process the events that transpired before awakening here in The First. Moments before, they were discernibly lifeless from their final dance at the End of the Universe. Only more reason to doubt that this was reality as she stared at a man that took his last breath a moment ago.
"You don't seem too enthused." She spoke before pausing to sip her tea. The placid surface of her expression veiled the tumultuous emotions below. Their relationship was complicated; unspoken through nothing but their own blades. There was more than being a Garlean that held significance between them. Much more. She met his gaze with a knowing familiarity. As if she let her eyes linger in distrust of his actions or admiration of his features. Perhaps both. Such a soft face Tanith investigated cautiously. So unsuited to a man whose heart felt little for the lives he had taken. Though Tanith knew better than to presume his motives were out of malice.
"Was this your doing?" His eyes closed again, uttering the reply.
"I'm not sure." The porcelain cup returned to its place with a clink. Tanith wove her fingers between the locks of Zenos's hair, endearingly, despite how tempestuous her thoughts of him were. He didn't seem to protest the fact that his head lay in her lap; in fact, his relaxed posture and the way his eyes closed at her touch suggested otherwise. She continued to speculate. "Do you suppose we are in some sort of afterlife? I recalled the aetherial sea being a bit more… abstract than this."
Everything beyond that memory only survived by the feeling of touch. The selfish desire to reach for something, recalling the unfamiliar feeling of void sent flesh and clawed fingers meeting her own. Tanith broke her gaze for a moment to look over Zenos's left arm. The sight of a monstrous hand withdrew beneath the blanket that covered him.
"I sense a malaise that only persists in my waking moments. This is reality indeed." He replied. Hardly did Zenos sport any semblance of surprise, but at that notion he was almost perplexed. "But at the very least I have closure for what transpired in our contest. For you are still here…alive."
"Closure. What a fascinating thing to seek among your sea of corpses. What further riddles do you provide?" Tanith gave his cheeks a gentle squeeze. "Spit it out."
"There is nothing in my mouth that would offer clarity on your inquiry. "
She let go, offering a dedicated five seconds of silent staring before adding another interrogation. "You didn't anticipate living, but you did do something . Is it to prolong this little 'contest' of yours?"
A silence lingered. The former prince succumbed to a melancholy that softened his expression into a noticeable frown. He chose to be lost in rumination rather than elucidate this estranged emotion.
"You're either magniloquent or lacking anything to say. Could you at least spare me a theory?"
"You do not recall the event as clearly as I have." Like a rising mountain, the garlean man sat up from where he lay. His tattered red cloak and combat-worn attire served to paint his exhausted visage further. He slowly turned to face the other garlean, sitting cross-legged. "I had asked if you found fulfillment. Had you an answer for me?"
Tanith's brows furrowed at that. A storm was brewing wildly in her mind as she stared up at the towering man with a mix of contempt and resolve. "Unfortunately, if I had the vigor to provide an answer the moment you asked, I would only have seconds before my words fell upon the ears of a corpse once more."
"Does that imply that you mourn for me? How odd…" He answered solemnly, before shifting his attention to another question that sprang to mind. With a placid voice that sent a shiver down Tanith's spine, he changed the subject. "Despite that, is the world you care so much for saved now that your prey has been vanquished? "
With that, Tanith returned to face Zenos. To gaze into his eyes; the darkened skin surrounding them. Blue, a shade far deeper than the sky. Cold yet knowing, placid yet lonely. She had no words, only memories of what took place over the past month. Her friend's sacrifices returned, her enemies before her as people who were once whole and fulfilled. Sorrow which clasped its hands tightly against happiness. She wouldn't dare let herself fall apart in the way that he asked that question so genuinely. Not to him. The journey was over. She didn't share a grave with Zenos, but her friends were far from this place and possibly under the impression that she was gone for good. There were people she wished to be here, to finally open the floodgates and pour her tears out now that it was calm again, hopefully--but she wasn't there with them. She was here, with him .
"Is it really over?" Tanith leaned forward, her strength failing as she leaned against Zenos's chest. "I suppose I do have you to thank for that.”
He didn't offer much else but the acceptance to allow Tanith this comfort. A subtly perplexed expression as Zenos failed to understand if he had any other part to play in this. Lingering apathy remained in his heart, though the precipice of something unknown was beginning to show itself to him.
Tanith continued to speak through his silence. "Did you find fulfillment?"
"I did not answer that?" She felt his voice rather than hearing it. There was sorrow tinging his words like the stains Tanith left with her tears on the marble floor.. "Perhaps death had taken me more swiftly than I presumed. Though it is no longer of importance. I would be more interested to know where we are now."
"The First, a reflection of The Source that I'm familiar with now. I woke up here with you and noticed that you were cold to the touch so I found this quilt. I suppose this was a unique place for travelers to take refuge from sineaters--ah, monsters of light, some time ago. There's a lot of supplies left here."
Tanith struggled to speak of such trifling matters. Her eyes watered so uncontrollably that her only defense against crying was to uncomfortably ball her fist so tight that her knuckles cracked.
"You expend such trivial effort for me, Tanith. You know fully well that I do not find satisfaction in it."
Somehow, when every moment Zenos spoke like that, Tanith could disregard it as nihilism fueled by the expectations and horror that the garlean empire sowed. but this time the ever-so-subtle waver in his voice implied otherwise.
"Hush, you. Suffer my trivialities." She heard the sounds of tears dropping to the marble flooring once more. Her face felt warm as she wept.
The comforting feeling of a clawed hand gently combed through her hair, as if Zenos had found a fleeting fascination to ruminate. "You surely do not believe that I am capable of seeing the world as you do?"
"Not as I do. Your misery shouldn't be solved by death, you simply need to find another means to exist as yourself. You just forgot to add other people's welfare into the equation when your self-indulgence became the bane of despair. "
Zenos replied with the most subtle exhale of a laugh.
"Ah, it is that persistence that has made you such a formidable enemy."
Yet somehow that comment gave her hope. She stood up straight again, hiding her reddened eyes and smudged makeup. "If my dying wish upon the dynamis came true, then the victor decides the future and I decided that yours is not over yet."
It was the first time she felt comfort in his wicked smile. Though perhaps he had no other way of expressing it more softly.
"A true Garlean through-and-through."
"Don't remind me, viator ." Tanith took that as her queue to stand up and stretch her legs. She was beyond tired; her soul was worn thin like taught threads. "I need to get some fresh air. This is quite a bit to process after all that's happened. I can't quite find myself forgiving you so easily, nor will I let you dodge my questions forever."
"It would not be like you to do so. Go now, do not suffer yourself with me further." Zenos replied flatly, something about his mood felt off. He only smiled for a moment until his expression was overcome with malaise. Perhaps disappointment or dejection, if one was keen to observe.
She offered him an estranged glance in return, turning away to face the draft that entered from beyond the corridor. Her boots made an echo within the eerily empty hallway, passing through stainless glass windows that painted colors onto the floor with moonlight. Tanith found herself in an overgrown courtyard of twisting vines and faintly illuminated heaps of forget-me-nots. The serenity bolstered this lightness in her heart, which contrasted with her leaden body. She left Zenos behind in the sanctuary, which may have not been the wisest decision but more than anything, Tanith desired a moment to breathe; to step out into the night air and take care of what she needed to assure her friends that the world, and herself, was well. She moved along the shadows, melding with them in her black attire, which was torn and frayed in some areas.
The entryway to the road ahead greeted her as she pivoted to take in the scenery. Tanith had lurked about these ruins once before to explore this peculiar location nestled into the verdant woods of Lakeland. It was a decent hike up the mountainside beyond a steep cobblestone pathway that was overgrown with flora and filled with the scent of pine trees. Presumably this was once a part of the Kingdom of Voeburt; a private sanctuary of a lord or lady. A lingering opulence of masterfully crafted masonry and ornate iron fences was left relatively untouched by disintegration. The courtyard itself was overgrown with purple hedges and outstretched oaks, familiar to that of the flora to the south. In the distance, the Crystal Tower pierced the horizon like a glimmering lance among the stars. The serenity of the night sky here was unlike that of The Source. It was something so uniquely coveted and dearly missed like an old friend once forgotten. Tanith sought solace in the darkness as she continued down the path until she was adequately 'lost' enough to call upon the aid of an adored companion. On a sizable rock she perched, leaning on the balls of her feet and cupping her hands around her mouth.
"Oh Feo Ul, the loveliest of pixies. My beautiful br-" Tanith hardly completed her sentence as the 'mad bloom' fae appeared before her like a match thrown into a crate of fireworks. Though they weren't in their usual pint-sized form but were adorned in a delicate pink dress and massive, brilliant orange wings of the fairy king themselves. Tanith felt her cheeks compressing to Feo Ul's hands as they squished her face endearingly. Much stronger than if they were their more recognizable size.
"Oh mah lovely sapling. Is that anise and juniper I smell? Yer offerin's 'er so delightful I had to make this meeting much grander than usual."
Tanith offered a reply. A muffled sound as she attempted to speak through Feo Ul's grip upon her face. Once the pixie realized this, they released her swiftly.
"Thanks. I have a couple questions, then a request perhaps. First of all, am I dead? Secondly, is The Source safe from those blasphemy monsters?"
"Well let's see. Hmmm hmm." In reply, Feo Ul tapped her long nails against her, then suddenly poofed away in a cloud of glittering gold dust. Tanith pursed her lips together in mild confusion before the fae returned in another puff of dazzling clouds.
"No more horrific abominations er' fiends of despair from wha' I saw. All's well! You appear ta' be quite alive too."
"Fucking hell…it was all real. What a relief though. Can you send Aendonys and Tataru a message for me?"
Anything fer my precious saplings!" Feo Ul bobbed excitedly, their dress billowing up as they twirled in excitement. "When they dream I'll send all your friends whatever you wish, speak away now!"
Tanith nodded, a meager smile forming. "Very well…"
She spoke of the events after sending Aendonys away to safety, before she faced the monster of Despair itself. It was a twisting feeling in her gut to have betrayed him like that, but in the likely chance that she was not able to survive, the world still needed. Aendonys Hotgo. Perhaps he would understand and soon come visit her. Though it would be best to warn him of Zenos.
Tanith again recollected everything just for Tataru and assured her that all was well. Describing the details of Ultima Thul, it's sadness and beauty, for surely Tataru would like to write it down as she did all her messages from The First. She would be the one to relay the information to Seiryu first and foremost.
"A dying star is rather beautiful in a way. Even when there was no presence there beyond the ghosts of memories. The dynamis painted swaths of vibrant colors across a black canvas that displayed broken and decimated stars. Even when that darkness closed in, when there was nothing more than specters of the past wandering aimlessly, hope lit this place like a flame in a cave."
Feo Ul transfixed themselves on those words. The moonlight reflecting like gemstones in her eyes. "Oh my sapling! You describe this place so beautifully! Maybe I'll enter tha dimension one day and send those poor souls some fae friends ta play a riveting game Eternal Tag."Tanith snickered at that, then continued her message. "I'll not be returning for a moment. The Scions and the auspices are privy to know why but not another soul. It's better that Zenos is presumed dead."
The faerie beamed for a moment before realizing Tanith's melancholy. The garlean pulled her knees up to her chin to contemplate.
"Thank you Feo Ul, that's all I needed."
"Now now, ya just went to the ends of the universe and saved yer mortal friends from eternal doom. What's with the long face fer?" Feo Ul hovered in a motherly fashion. As Titania, they were less like a child and more like an overzealous parent.
"I made a rather selfish wish, I'm afraid. My greatest enemy only ever wanted to end the world to have one final fight with me so that he could feel something. I presumed he was as malicious and deceived as the rest of his family but there are moments where I question if his mentality was irreversible. That agony of ennui was only cleansed through violence. I can’t be certain that he will cease that indulgence."
"Oh ya got a good case of infatuation! Makes mortals forgive the worst of sins!" Feo Ul clasped their hands together charmingly.
"N-no! How could I possibly love someone like him?" Tanith straightened her back defensively. "That's not--oh gods...do I? Can you make me not with some kind of pixie magic? That's something you can do right?"
"Hmm.." Feo Ul disregarded the mortal's request as something their attention had diverted elsewhere. "What is that odd little flower ya got there. May I see it?" The faerie king pointed to the wilting Elpis flower tucked into Tanith's jacket. Part of a petal peaked out from her lapels in a rosey pink hue.
"Oh this?" She retrieved it to show Feo Ul. "It's an Elpis flower I picked from Ultima Thul. Are you familiar with it?"
"I don't know where ya got tha name from but we use a similar flower to reveal hidden feelings. When it's pink it means a mortal is usually lovesick o' cares about someone unconditionally."
"It..it's probably not working right because I plucked it from the end of the unive--"
"It is INDEED right!" Feo Ul huffed. "Love is pure and good intentioned! Do ya think I'd lie about somethin' like that?! Now hand it over RIGHT this moment!"
Birds scattered and the leaves rustled as the Faerie King chastised Tanith. For as brave as she was to face the avatar of Despair itself, Titania's wrath was much worse. The fae snatched the Elpis flower quickly, but they handled it with the delicacy of a dog holding a chicken egg in its mouth. Which, to Tanith's surprise–was very delicate. From being tucked away the stem had grown lax and the leaves had drooped. A wave of Feo Ul's hand conjured forth the aether that revived its color and beauty as if it was freshly plucked. As a final display of their powers, a magical dust fell from their fingertips to cast a spell that halted the effect of time on it.
"See, good as new and still pink as a porxie!"
Tanith retrieved the flower, turning it between her fingers a few times in indignant shame. She dared not argue with her pixie companion any further.
"I gather your meaning, Feo Ul. I just don't want my emotions to cause something horrible. I think the strife and turmoil I experienced in Ultima Thul granted me a dying wish and it would pain me to know that it jeopardizes others."
Their voice was much softer this time, as the Faerie King replied. "Maybe it wasn't just yer wish, my sapling. It might have been the same for yer 'enemy' as well. How else do you think the two of you survived together? "
With that, Tanith exhaled. The ephemeral flower returned to the space beneath her lapels as her gaze drowned in the midnight sky, which reminded her of how heavy her eyelids felt; how tantalizing the thought of sleep was whispered into her ears by twinkling stars. Leaving Zenos to his own devices in this world wouldn't grant her that.
"You might be right…Do you think anyone is born evil, Feo Ul?" Tanith wrapped her arms around her own knees as the chill of the mountainside crept down into the valley.
"That's a silly idea tha' mortals made up, like the boogeyman. Except tha' boogeyman is actually real and quite terrifyin'.'' They chuckled, a contagious smile that passed itself onto Tanith.
"I assumed so." She replied, shutting her eyes for a moment as the breeze traveled through the trees and the crickets chirped. It must have been a pleasant change for the creatures of the night to feel safe outside of the darkness of ruins and cellars. As Tanith opened her eyes again, Feo Ul was gone and silence had returned to the woods.
"Solitude is the only friend who will not leave you." The garlean spoke aloud to herself. "...Garlemald has such pretentious sayings."
Yet it was something she couldn't deny. As people came and went in ways transient and permanent, this quiet solitude was always promised even if it was for a brief moment. As much as she sought to test the limits of her own abilities, the calm after the storm was the salve that healed her wounds and settled her mind.
Yet she knew too intimately well what Zenos suffered from. The malaise that followed after the conflict, when all was finally
well. A darkness which lurked at the corner of every smiling face, and scenes of joy which made moments like this harrowing. Harrowing because for everything that felt good, the pain of fighting for it was exhausting and heartbreaking. Happiness and sorrow truly did go hand in hand, yet with too much sorrow happiness felt unreal. There was an inexplicable sadness to every blasphemy that only needed a tincture of hope to contain oneself. Guilt was heavy on the mind of every person who felt unable to provide it. Yet Zenos had passion far beyond that, an unshakable will which never faltered to achieve his desires. Tanith knew that she and Zenos saw things in each other that they didn't often see in themselves. It was romantic in it's twisted way, as she never felt this close to someone she hardly ever had an intimate moment with. Perhaps their souls really were fated to be tied together by a red string.
All because of what Aulus did.
"I still don’t trust him." Tanith uttered quietly among the choir of crickets. “...but I suppose I must.”
She found herself haphazardly drifting off to sleep. Musing about her own feelings of relief as the heart of the world that her soul cared so deeply for continued to beat. Doubt made its attempt to creep into Tanith's mind as she accepted that peace was to be enjoyed in the moment. For now, that shade of despair would continue to be there, as it always has. A shade of doubt; despair that will never truly fade. If only she had the words that would convey what this feeling was, how stubborn her soul burned in the darkest most suffocating darkness in order to live–to thrive.
From that contemplation the sound of a distant roar caught her attention. An inhuman cacophony that triggered the scurrying of animals. She waited in silence to confirm a second shriek, this time more shrill and wracked with pain. This coerced her to sit up to determine the direction of the source as she raised her head to discern the location.
Northward, near the ruins. If it was a monster or rabid beast, surely it wouldn't fare well in a turf battle with Zenos. For once, this didn’t concern her enough to play heroics.
Apathetically, Tanith returned to her meditation until the sound of a woman’s frantic voice carried into the wind. The familiarity sent her body into immediate chills.
"Ryne!"