Chapter Text
It was another one of those repetitive quiet nights, where the streets fell silent and the wind and condensation pressed their weight against the windows. This was not unusual for late march, but the ringing in Ash’s ears was keeping them awake. A flash of light would glare through the bottom of the blinds and for a moment there would be sounds ripping through the street as a car rumbled past but before they could blink the spots out of their vision it would be gone, and they would be plunged into silence again.
Their own breathing. Their own heart. The deafening sound of fabric crinkling as they moved because it was too damn silent in there tonight and they couldn’t deal with it-
Ash sighed and sat up.
It was 3am and they had school that day but despite tucking their phone under the camp bed 2 hours ago their brain would not shut off. Nat certainly wasn't helping with her corpse-still sleep, complete with lack of breathing and the total absence of any movement or twitches until, inevitably, she would jolt awake at 6. Her silence ached in their chest. They never noticed before how much they noticed those sorts of things. It’s rather uncanny to sleep in the same room as someone who turns into a statue the moment they shut their eyes. But hey, at least she got to sleep fast. Ash did not get that privilege, being a filthy normie and all.
Fuck, they couldn’t do this tonight.
There was an emptiness clawing at their stomach, and they were sure Nat had a worse one eroding away. A question they wanted to ask. Ash had asked it before, casually, a few times since they had moved in.
The house was dead silent.
It felt too big for them alone.
Ash stuck out a leg and just about managed to kick Nat in the side, jolting her awake earlier than her internal clock would prefer. They considered lying and saying it was an accident, but there wasn’t much point in that.
“The hell was that for?” Nat groaned through a mouthful of pillow and static.
“Where are your parents?” Was tugged out of Ash’s mouth before they could conjure a softer way to ask. “They haven’t been home since November.”
Nat’s silence was deafening, and Ash sat up with their back leaning on Nat's desk to compose themselves. Nat dragged herself to an upright position too, crouched in the middle of her bed.
“I don’t know.” Nat said after an age.
“What do you mean you don’t know. You know everything-“
“I mean… I mean I don’t know. Hell if I haven’t tried. Tried to Know, I mean. Well… I don’t know exactly where they are but…”
“So… so you kind of know?”
“Not really- they’ve been sending me texts, and voice messages, and pictures, a hotel somewhere, Ash- it’s them, it’s definitely them- but they won’t come home-“ she inhaled, exhaled. “I don’t know.” Inhale, then again. Again. She hacked it back out again. “Something’s wrong, obviously, but I don’t know what.”
“What- are- are you… no, stupid question, obviously you;re not ok.”
Nat laughed, but it came out all wrong. She stopped trying.
“I can’t cry-” her shoulders rolled, and another barking cough dredged its way from her lungs. Her brutal form of a sob. Her breathing- that fickle thing- quickened and as Ash dove to hold her they felt her treacle-slow pulse quicken to almost normal speeds. Nat clung on like they would shatter each other if they were to let go.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t… I shouldn’t have woken you up. I just couldn’t sleep, god… I’m so…”
“Shut up…” Nat grumbled into their shoulder, and Ash couldn't help but laugh. “It’s like something is keeping us apart on purpose. But why a fear power would just want to spit me up from my parents I have no clue.”
“Maybe they… want you alone, or vulnerable for something? Maybe it’s all part of the Eye’s elaborate plan to make you evil, I don’t know… but that can wait until the sun is up so things don’t feel so hopeless.”
“Well if they’re trying to isolate me they’re doing a pretty shit job,” Nat said, the pair both feeling hyper aware of the contact between them. Her voice was muffled by Ash’s shoulder. “Could it be Helen?” She added after a long moment’s pause. Ash sighed.
“…No, I don’t think so. It just doesn’t seem her style. Plus, I’d hope she felt bad enough by now to give them back.” Nat snorted.
“Maybe we’ve done a trade again. My parents for yours.”
“God, that's so morbid.” Ash replied. “Though I s’pose that's our natural state nowadays.”
“Well… look on the bright side, we’ve got a trip in a couple weeks, 3 days in a hotel in London with all our lot and Mr Sims!”
Nat smiled. “I do like a good distraction.”
“Yeah, they’re always great. Really keeps the thoughts of doom away, y’know…”
“Yeah, rose tinted glasses are stylish anyway.”
Outside, the gentle tap tap tap of rain began against the window.
Its slow pulse kept the rhythm of the world, a quickening pulse. It wasn’t going to be torrential or anything, but enough to cause some puddles, maybe back up a drain or two. Waiting for the bus the next day was going to be a game of car roulette, crossing their fingers and begging that the next vehicle wouldn’t cross too close to the curb and soak them all. They didn’t get the peak spot in the real bus shelter, that was still reserved for year 11s, but they were better than the year 7s on the street corner. A knot tied in Ash’s stomach as they remembered that in a few months they would have that bus stop. It was almost exam season, and then the summer, and then the big year 11 was waiting. From all they’d heard, that year was nothing but cramming and mock after mock after mock. And then…
And then college. Or sixth form. Or whatever they chose.
Probably the same place as the others. Probably even some of the same subjects. But not like now. The chances were that they wouldn’t likely even be in the same classes even if the course was the same, let alone the same tutorial that they could skive to hang out.
Mr Sims’ words were weighing heavier in their mind than they’d let on.
What if they had to split up, could they cope? Lose their one constant for five years? Worse, what if they find new friends, move on, drift apart? Who knew of anyone remaining best friends with their secondary school friend group? Did Ash even know how to be normal anymore?
They didn’t want to, certainly. They couldn’t, wouldn’t, go back to the way it was before.
“Stop it.” Nat muttered, still fiddling with Ash’s hair.
“Stop what?” Asked Ash, despite the fact that they knew Nat could read their thoughts.
“Stop overthinking the future, there’s no point. And don’t even worry about it- best friends forever, right? I’m not planning on being the one to break that, are you?”
“No,” Ash vehemently shook their head. Nat spat out a face full of hair. “But… I’m just scared, you know? What’s that then, Lonely? Sounds about right. Or maybe… Vast in some way. The big wide world. I always try to stay the happy one but I don’t know if I can keep it up if I can’t keep us all together.”
“Slow down, you're thinking wayyyy too far ahead. Who says were even gonna have to split up anyway? Maybe I’ll pull a few strings at college, blackmail an admin or three, get us all in the same form…” she trailed off. “There’s a million and one ways to fix anything that goes wrong.”
Ash sighed. “I love you, you know that?”
“Course I do. I love you too.”
—
Sam was glad of the fact that this wasn’t a normal lesson in Mr Sims’ classroom and thus he could sit on the tables whatever way he fancied.
Jon, alongside a few other teachers, stood at the desk behind the covid safe plexiglass that did fuck all and coughed to collect the focus of the room.
“Right, well, thank you all for coming here during lunch, I’m sure you’d all much rather be getting canteen lunch right now.” a dry laugh murmured from the collective. “Well, ah, I’m just going to be going over the last few things and the finalised schedule for the London trip in a few weeks.”
The trip that all of the conspirators had, separately, uncoordinated, managed to convince Georgie and Melanie to use their special web credit card for. Nat had them pay back her work money as a direct deposit. She’s still not quite sure how she got away with it. Anyway, the four were just excited to be let loose in London, sharing a hotel room, midnight snacks, hunting down the most haunted alleyways and creepy catacombs as they could on a three day (two night) trip. They were certain they could pen it in around their busy schedule checking out the world’s dullest museums and slightly-above-average architecture.
It was a shame the magnus institute was gone, according to everything Jon said (and Nat’s ominous dreams). They would have liked to at least have a little look at the source of all their horrible trauma. Maybe burn it down themselves while they were at it.
“The coach will be leaving school around 4:30 in the morning and please do not be late, as we can’t afford to be hanging around for stragglers. If you aren’t on the coach by 4:45 at the absolute latest we will be leaving without you, no exceptions. Do not take that as the time you should get there, I want to see everyone outside the front gate by 4:15 ideally. Am I understood?”
A chorus of yes sir echoed around the room, even from the other teachers and TA’s that stood behind him.
“While it’s not forecast to rain while we’re there, it is April in London so do pack plenty of warm clothing, trust me, as someone who lived and worked in London for years, it gets colder there than it does here in the south west. And hotter too.” He added in a grumble. “You can never find the right bloody outfit for the weather this time of year.” he complained under his breath, to no one in particular.
“It’ll be two to a hotel room, twin beds, don’t worry, and you can choose from a number up and down the 3rd floor hallway of the premier inn in Kensington.”
“Living in luxury.” Oliver snorted.
“A whole premier inn, can you believe our luck?” Sam replied as the huddle giggled.
“We will be visiting a few museums which thankfully you will be able to browse at your leisure, no tour guide required. And, hopefully more exciting…” Jon scanned down the list of talking points he’d been sent earlier that day with the refined trip plan. “A night walking ghost tour. All the most haunted spots in central London, apparently.” Somehow he highly doubted that Hilltop road or a walkthrough of the tunnels (that hopefully didn’t exist here) beneath old Millbank prison would be on that tour’s agenda. “That’ll be on the evening of the first night, so please do sleep on the bus on the way up. I don’t want to be corralling a group of exhausted teenagers at 11 o'clock at night so please help make my life a little easier by catching up on sleep on the journey.” He sighed. That was just about everything on his list.
A colleague or two stepped forwards to finish off the presentation, repeating something or other about manners and respect and representing the school even out of uniform and across the country, but Jon was not listening. He slumped down in his chair and massaged his temples.
Something had been giving him a major headache for the last few days and that was never an omen of anything particularly good.
There was something building, he could feel, that wasn’t supposed to be there. A weight was pressing on his shoulders but he couldn’t for the life of him place what it was, and the Eye was being as helpful as ever with things that he actually wanted to know. No, instead he got to know that Miss Porter, the TA currently prattling on about the dry campus rule to a bunch of 14 year olds who were barely going to be out of their sight anyway, was having an emotional affair with her next door neighbour. That, and that one of his students had a statement. He licked his lips instinctively, and then looked away. He didn’t need to use his eyes to know that Nat was staring too. He hoped she was resisting the urge as much as he was.
There was a pressure building behind his eyes like a kettle reaching its boiling point. His appetite was never-ending these days no matter how much he tried to sate it. Jon wasn’t exactly sure what was coming, or when, but he was going to stop it, and he was going to do it with no casualties this time- the kids were going to be ok, even if the world came crumbling down on his back.
He would not allow otherwise, thus it must be so.