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English
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Published:
2021-11-14
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465
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1/1
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Meet the Zebrataurs!

Summary:

Zulius. World-touring, magazine-covering, award-winning, one-of-a-kind diva. But where did he come from? What kind of family could have produced such an individual?

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

“Well there's great grandfather Aalius, his brother Balius, then of course the twins Calius and Dalius...

...Helius, Ielius, Jelius...

...Milius, Nilius, Oilius, Pilius, Qilius...

...Solius, Tolius, Uolius...

...Wulius, Xulius, Yulius, and of course you’ve met little baby Zulius!”

Horse snapped back to wakefulness at the exclamation. Zulius’ mother, Folius, and father, Zolius, were beaming proudly at their “little baby,” who was shedding enough glitter to outshine the moon and give the sun a serious run for its money. She had wondered why he had gone so over-the-top with the clothes, makeup, and hairstyling on their way to the zebrataur grasslands, but staring at the herd gathered behind Folius and Zolius, she could make a guess.

“Okay, so, your whole deal is...similarity? Being identical?”

“Yes!” One hundred and twenty-nine indistinguishable zebrataurs said in unison.

“Yep, that’s the whole kind of thing here,” said Zulius, who stood out like a neon rainbow in a cloudy sky. The crowd broke into quiet mutters behind him, Folius’ smile became a lot more strained, and Zolius coughed awkwardly before soldiering on.

“Yes! Our herd, our species really, has found our greatest defense in numbers and size. We can’t make ourselves physically bigger-”

“Speak for yourself,” muttered Ched, pointedly kissing his bicep before setting down on Glendale’s back to do pushups.

“-so we rely on optical illusion, woOooOo! Attacking an individual zebrataur is one thing, but a whole wall of them? Most enemies think twice about that, haha! And of course even if they do decide to risk it, the way our stripes blend together as we run can confuse even the most watchful foes!”

“Solid strategy,” murmured Horse. Durpleton and Glendale were counting Ched’s very loud pushups for him, Zulius was reapplying his eyeshadow, and Wammawink was still dozing from the introductions, so she guessed she was taking point on this one.

”So, uh, Zulius, I mean I’m guessing, based on what I know of him...” she gestured, and Folius and Zolius cringed a little. A few of the other zebrataurs stepped forward.

“It has been lovely meeting your little herd, but we’re gonna take the little ones to the water park,” the leader said, before following in a pointed undertone, “We don’t want them getting any ideas.” This was directed at Folius and Zolius, who were practically melting from cringing so hard.

“Aalyis! Balyis! Calyis! Dalyis! Ealyis-”

Horse shook herself as the children’s roll call continued in the background, about a third of the herd breaking off to urge the youngest zebrataurs away. Given the way some of them were looking at Zulius, as he somehow managed to affix more earrings to his already-laden ears, Horse couldn’t blame them. He had a certain magnetism when backed by his family, that both drew the eye and screamed bad influence.

Notes:

I am super looking forward to the new season of Centaurworld in December, and it doesn't look like they'll be getting into character backstories, so I figured I'd make my own. It's interesting to me how every member of the herd is a different sub-species: llama, bird, deer, giraffe, and zebra. Let me know if you want me to write more of this.