Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Wei Wuxian shot upright in bed.

His heart was pounding in his chest and he felt sweat running down his temples.

“What…” he whispered.

His voice came out shaky, wavering in a way he was uncomfortably unaccustomed to.

“What the fuck was that—just now I... I just—! Did I really have… with—?!”

“Hngh…” Jiang Cheng grumbled across from him somewhere in the darkness, followed by the sound of the bedding rustling as his shidi rolled over, away from Wei Wuxian’s side of their guestroom.

Wei Wuxian immediately silenced himself.

His hands were trembling and his whole body felt as hot as burning coals and now that he was awake and trying to gather his bearings again after whatever the fuck his mind seemed to have just randomly conjured out of thin air, he could distinctly feel—and somehow that made everything worse, so, so, so much worse—that tell-tale wetness between his legs that he hadn’t had to deal with since the first time he had been shown erotic picture books by an overeager fellow disciple when he had just hit his first growth-spurt.

His youthful mind had been scandalized and amazed that female bodies were supposedly able to bend like that and that night he had dreamed vaguely of warm skin brushing his own and delicate hands touching his face, his arms, his stomach.

This was different.

No, this had been something else entirely and suddenly it was impossible to stay in bed, in this room where his shidi had slept none the wiser while Wei Wuxian had had such thoughts.

He jumped to his feet, stumbled slightly upon noting his legs felt weak and unsure somehow, then hastened to grab fresh robes to go wash and change in the adjourning bathroom. Evidence thus removed he rushed outside, past the doors leading to the other guest disciples’ rooms, almost breaking into a run, as if he could outrace the memory of him and Lan Wangji doing—

As soon as the cold night air filled his lungs he finally stopped to inhale shakily and lowered himself onto the steps of the dormitory’s entrance.

At heart Wei Wuxian was a curious person.

Often, he felt that shame was something that would only hinder him from exploring new things or eliciting interesting reactions in others. He was also not prone to lying to himself or denying himself thoughts society deemed inappropriate.

But this dream had come out of nowhere. He could say with a clear conscience that he hadn’t ever had such dirty thoughts in Lan Wangji’s vicinity before, would have certainly remembered anything like it.

Sure, if he considered things honestly, he couldn’t deny that he liked teasing the quiet boy a whole lot, liked spending time with him even if that time mostly consisted of having to copy the Lan clan rules as punishment.

And Lan Wangji was attractive, but even a blind person could see that.

There was nothing at all to complain about as far as Lan Wangji’s appearance was concerned.

After all, even though he was a bit stuffy at times, no one could deny that Lan Wangji’s rigidly disciplined training of mind and body seemed to be paying off a great deal. Just earlier this week Jiang Cheng had complained how unfair it was to them to be compared to Lan Wangji by the older generations. According to Jiang Cheng, the stern second young master of the Lan sect didn’t seem to need anything else in life apart from air, food and his clan’s thousands of rules to feel content, just as if old man Lan had dreamed up his ideal student and the heavens had felt gracious, gifting him a nephew as stone faced as that boulder the Lan clan based their entire existence on.

In Wei Wuxian's opinion though, Lan Wangji was one of a kind and so it was only right that he should respect him, admire him even. After all, no one apart from the other young man had posed a real challenge to him in a fight for a long time.

Had he confused that admiration for something else somehow?

Had his dreaming mind confused Lan Wangji with the pretty girls he had flirted with in Yunmeng because he had maybe compared him to them as far as desirability went before?

Sudden heat engulfed him as his memory helpfully provided him with clear evidence against such speculations. Because, had that been the case, surely Lan Wangji would have had to be the one adopting the woman’s role in that dirty scene and not...

Wei Wuxian felt an intense blush creep up his neck as he thought about how Lan Wangji had acted in his dream instead—not at all like the delicate, white-skinned maidens Nie Huaisang's springbooks often depicted.

Instead, he had been forceful and agressive, behaving like some feral beast in heat, forcing Wei Wuxian down to the ground, overwhelming him, pushing his legs apart and making him yield, making space for himself deep inside his—

“Arrghh,” Wei Wuxian groaned into his arms, hiding his flaming cheeks from the world even though there was no one around to see.

He hadn’t even known that one could stick something up there!!!

In his dream it had hurt, had felt foreign and big and hot and then slowly it had felt really, really…

“Shit, shit, SHIT! Heavens, Wei Wuxian! Get a hold of yourself!”

He slapped his fiery cheeks a few times, desperately attempting to think about literally anything else, but his mind was stuck on the way Lan Wangji's face had looked in the throes of their passion, how his eyes had been blazing and staring down into Wei Wuxian’s very soul, dark pupils almost entirely consuming their usual pale hue, how his hands and hips had been violent, yet his lips had been so soft and had kissed him so gently in the end. How his toned chest had felt against Wei Wuxian’s own, how his broad shoulders and strong arms had engulfed Wei Wuxian’s body, holding Lan Wangji up effortlessly as he thrust forward into where Wei Wuxian had grown wet and open again and again and again.

A high sound escaped Wei Wuxian’s throat as he involuntarily felt heat spread to his belly and linger there.

Truly, there seemed to be no escaping it.

Wherever that dream had come from, he wouldn’t be able to just forget it now, didn’t even know how he could face Lan Wangji tomorrow in class or—heavens above—how he could possibly spend his day across from him, sharing space in the library pavilion, the very location Wei Wuxian’s crazy head had chosen for tonight’s assault on his own sanity.

The first signs of the coming dawn were already lightening the sky when Wei Wuxian finally managed to pull himself together enough to return to bed.

_______

Wei Wuxian was determined to not let last night’s dream change anything important.

In the light of the new day, his memory of it seemed like some strange mirage, something he should not overthink lest he hurt his brain trying to figure out its implications.

During class he was almost able to forget about it too, easily slipping right back into his known patterns of only listening to their teacher with half an ear, scribbling down whatever else interested him that moment, sending Nie Huaisang small notes and drawings and receiving peanuts in return.

Each student had their own writing desk, so even though Wei Wuxian had chosen to sit next to Lan Wangji the first day of the lectures there was still enough space between them as to not disrupt his composure.

He couldn't quite bring himself to teasingly send his usual armada of papermen Lan Wangji's way, however.

Even glancing towards the white-clad boy didn’t seem like much of a good idea when Wei Wuxian wasn’t sure what his mind would force him to remember were they to lock eyes.

In comparison to other days this made him seem almost well-behaved since there was no one left to fool around with as soon as Lan Qiren began his daily round of quizzing and Nie Huaisang's responsiveness completely ceased as his friend attempted to melt into the white paper screen wall behind him.

Jiang Cheng was only receptive to Wei Wuxian’s idling in class during truly dull topics and everyone else was probably too scared of Lan Qiren’s ire while the man scoured the room with his eyes, searching for someone to answer his next inquiry.

It ended up being a disciple from Baling Ouyang whose name Wei Wuxian had forgotten. He wondered whether Lan Wangji had noticed anything different about him yet as he absentmindedly whispered a correction to what the guy from Baling stammered out in response to Lan Qiren’s question regarding fights in compromising environments and weather conditions against yaoguai that typically only appeared in overly humid regions.

Seriously, this was stuff Wei Wuxian had read about years ago already, plundering the Jiang sect’s library whenever he felt particularly bored, which happened fairly often.

In marshlands and swamps animals and their monstrous relatives were perfectly adapted to their surroundings—fins, webbed feet and scales or an extra pair of legs or wings allowing them to move fairly quickly while a human might get in trouble standing in knee-deep mud or water should they need to move swiftly or fight.

There were talismans for that though and special equipment and clothing that, while often quite expensive, was also quite fascinating.

Enough so that Wei Wuxian had studied it to his heart’s content the few times he had gotten his hands on it before running to bother the Jiangs' talisman master—often enough that the man had fondly but decisively thrown him through the window of his workshop once or many times whenever he had bailed on one of his classes to come interrogate him again.

In addition, Yunmeng and Baling were quite wet regions so Wei Wuxian had had his fair share of nighthunts that involved such beasts and wondered how sheltered the boy from the Ouyang sect must have been to not know this stuff like the back of his hand.

As much as he loved to read, Lan Wangji probably already knew all this stuff as well. Wei Wuxian really wished they would get more opportunities to challenge their theoretical knowledge out in the field. Lan Wangji probably made for an excellent nighthunter.

Unofficial duels weren’t usually allowed between students in the Cloud Recesses. But Wei Wuxian had already had a taste of the Second Jade of Lan’s swordsmanship the first time they had met and thus knew what the world was missing out on.

He felt it was truly a waste that the lectures didn’t include regular spars between the disciples, since their main goal was instead to provide the visiting students and heirs with a solid grasp of politics, history and the opportunity to socialize with peers one wouldn’t usually spend so much time with.

And really, what a pity, since Lan Wangji with a sword was truly—

Wei Wuxian’s thoughts came to a screeching halt, abruptly conjuring up the raunchy jokes he had heard older Jiang disciples make about whether their respective sword skills were enough to impress the female world, talking about a different kind of sword entirely. Wei Wuxian was embarrassed his thoughts had led him to such a flat euphemism, then he was embarrassed to be embarrassed and during all that, his thoughts taking a dangerous turn towards Lan Wangji’s sword and what it had done to him in his dream—Wei Wuxian didn’t know about the female world, but he himself would probably count as impressed, more like blown away, more like utterly and mortifyingly overcome—his grasp on his brush slipped and the offending object made its dripping way over the table’s edge to the floor and towards where the white hem of a certain person’s robe started in the periphery of his sight.

“Ahh!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed, ripped from his mental downward spiral ending in what he had somehow successfully avoided contemplating all morning, interrupting some Jin disciple’s apparent attempt at stalling having to admit not knowing the answer to Lan Qiren’s next question.

“Wei Ying!” the old man scolded, glaring at him. “Don’t make noise when it is not your turn to speak.”

Wei Wuxian held his tongue and didn’t remark upon the Jin disciple’s obvious relief at being interrupted, since Lan Qiren probably knew even better than anyone that the guy couldn’t answer whatever it was that he had asked.

“Wei Ying apologizes,” he managed distractedly, because, just in that moment, he felt the burning gaze he had spent all morning avoiding.

Inadvertently, he turned his head to look.

Time slowed down as Wei Wuxian’s eyes locked with that golden stare.

He was flustered immediately, his heart picking up speed without his say-so, his nape growing hot.

He couldn’t look away again.

In the background some other disciple was being questioned, but Wei Wuxian’s surroundings were growing blurry—he was abruptly overwhelmed by his memories of staring up into the exact face he was looking at right now—suddenly recalled details he had formerly suppressed; the strand of hair that had fallen onto Lan Wangji’s forehead as he had leaned down to reconnect their lips after Wei Wuxian had begged him to do so, the strand he had been unable to tuck behind one of those burning red ears because his hands had still been tied together with Lan Wangji’s forehead ribbon—his own hands which he had tucked behind Lan Wangji's neck to pull him down, feeling his shoulder muscles shift as Lan Wangji distributed his weight to better reach Wei Wuxian’s mouth.

The wet glide of a plundering tongue, not stopping to let him breathe through its onslaught yet tasting so sweet somehow—the smell of sandalwood mixed with the heady tang of sweat and sex that Wei Wuxian hadn't known his dreams knew how to emulate since he hadn’t even kissed anyone before.

Details way too specific to belong to some random wet dream, details that spoke of extensive study and consideration of Lan Wangji’s person on Wei Wuxian’s part.

He knew he was blushing furiously once more, knew his expression showed his mortification—and hopefully only that.

Lan Wangji almost imperceptibly raised an eyebrow after more time had passed than would normally be appropriate to hold eye contact and only then did Wei Wuxian notice that Lan Wangji had picked up his brush, had been holding it towards him this whole time, waiting for him to take it back.

All of a sudden it was all too much.

Wei Wuxian shot up from his seat, startling the class as he immediately whirled around. The skirts of his robes must have swiped the papers on his desk to the ground and he heard Lan Wangji beginning to say his name, but it was all too much, his senses consumed with recollections of that exact voice huskily speaking to him—who said I don’t know and Wei Ying, Wei Ying, Wei Ying—his groan as he sheathed himself fully the first painful time, the way Wei Wuxian had pleaded and begged, yet Lan Wangji had not listened, had only picked up the pace.

His quiet gasp as he came, filling Wei Wuxian up with something hot, scalding—branding him forever.

He stumbled as he ran, ignoring Lan Qiren and Jiang Cheng shouting after him, almost crashing into the sword stand by the entrance in his haste to retrieve Suibian, every instinct screaming at him to get the hell away, to run and hide in the face of an unknown opponent.

_______

This couldn’t continue!

This was utterly unacceptable and things needed to change immediately! Never before in his life had Wei Wuxian felt this humiliated by something his own mind had cooked up!

No, he would get himself back under control. He would return everything to normal and apologize to Lan Wangji for running out on him, or—well, Lan Wangji probably didn’t actually care all that much.

Somehow right now that hurt.

It isn’t Lan Zhan’s problem that I've gone crazy, Wei Wuxian thought somewhat bitterly to himself.

No, this was his own problem and he would solve it himself. Usually, he was quite good at that.

Determined, he rolled down from the branch he had chosen to have his meltdown on and brought a thoughtful hand up to his chin. Now that there was some distance between him and Lan Wangji again, he should attempt to think about this logically.

So.

Somehow, he had dreamed up a ridiculously filthy and way too detailed cutsleeve fantasy about Lan Wangji and himself. Out of nowhere. Why on earth would he even assume Lan Wangji would behave that way?! Yet, just as he thought that, he couldn’t deny that it didn’t feel entirely impossible that Lan Wangji would behave how he had, placed in such a situation. Somehow, everything that had happened in his dream, everything Lan Wangji had done—while it had surprised him madly, on some level it strangely fit what Wei Wuxian knew about the other.

The way Lan Wangji had carried himself had not really contradicted any trait Wei Wuxian would assign his character.

But something about this matter didn’t sit right.

Wei Wuxian couldn’t remember ever seeing cutsleeve porn before and while he knew in theory that such people existed somewhere, he had never considered if he might be interested in such things himself.

The girls he had found pretty had responded to his flirting and he had liked it, could imagine taking a wife one day far in the future, to have a big family with her and being happy that way.

The sound of running feet interrupted his musings and as he turned around, he saw Jiang Cheng hurrying towards him, followed by a gasping Nie Huaisang who didn’t seem all that happy to be going so fast. Class seemed to have ended already.

“What the fuck was that, Wei Wuxian?!” Jiang Cheng groused as the two came to a halt in front of him.

Nie Huaisang leaned heavily against the magnolia tree Wei Wuxian had been just sitting on to catch his breath.

“I think this time—haaah! Jiang-xiong, why did you need to sprint like that?? You really made old man Lan mad, Wei-xiong,” his friend finally said. “This may be what finally makes him kill you.”

Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes.

“Seriously what’s gotten into you to just run off like that? I won’t help you out of this mess, just so you know.” Jiang Cheng was quick to cross his arms and glare at him.

“I just couldn’t sit down any longer!” Wei Wuxian defended himself. “What can Lan Qiren even do, apart from assigning me even more lines to copy? I’m already doing that anyway, might as well make the most of it.”

Now that he thought about it though, more copying assignments would mean even more time spent in Lan Wangji’s quiet company and wasn’t that a thought.

As he was now, Wei Wuxian wasn’t sure how he would be able to focus on anything and then he would need to repeat his year of lectures just as Nie Huaisang had because he still had his punishment to finish.

“You’re doing it again! You’ve been spacing out all morning, what is your deal?” Jiang Cheng wanted to know and Wei Wuxian had the urge to tease him for his concern but came up short, because he honestly didn’t know what to tell his friends.

Nie Huaisang seemed interested in his answer as well by the way he was peeking at him over his fan.

“Well... I didn’t sleep well last night. And class was boring me, what can I say?”

“So what? You suddenly start behaving in class and then when Lan-er-gongzi gives you your brush you suddenly bail as if you can’t stand the sight of him? What was up with that?” Jiang Cheng continued suspiciously.

Wei Wuxian winced. He had hoped no one had caught that.

“You always annoyed him, has it finally come back to bite you in the ass?” his shidi went on.

“That is not...” Wei Wuxian started, but he could already feel his blush returning at Jiang Cheng’s unfavorable wording. Nie Huaisang’s eyes gained something contemplative.

“Stop being so crude! Let’s just go back and grab lunch, I didn't have breakfast this morning,” Wei Wuxian deflected, reaching up to fix his ribbon that had become tangled while he had leaned against the tree’s branch.

“Oh no, you won’t,” Jiang Cheng huffed. “Old man Lan wants to speak to you, he told us to send you back as soon as we found you. I really wouldn’t want to be in your skin right now. He was creepily composed when he asked.”

“Yeah, he didn’t even shout! Whatever he plans to do to you, he wouldn’t even tell us,” Nie Huaisang added, eyes big and shimmering with worry.

“Alright, I’ll go then! Jiang Cheng, you grab something edible for me from the eating hall, won’t you? Don’t look as if you already have to plan my funeral—if worst comes to worst he can only kick me out! If that’s the case I’ll send you Emperor’s Smile per courier!”

“That’s some dedication!” Nie Huaisang praised, while Jiang Cheng just scoffed and rolled his eyes.

The two said goodbye to Wei Wuxian at the intersection that would lead them to the eating hall, while Wei Wuxian returned to the Lanshi.

With one last threat from Jiang Cheng to not bring anymore shame upon the Jiang sect’s head, Wei Wuxian was left alone again.

_______

Lan Qiren sat at the teacher’s desk, noting something down on what seemed to be some student’s assignment with elegant and slow strokes. Upon Wei Wuxian’s entry he wordlessly signaled him to sit down and wait for him to finish.

Somewhat bemused Wei Wuxian did as he was told.

While he waited, he noted how strangely different the classroom looked when almost empty.

In class the presence of so many bored or antsy students often made him feel antsy as well, so many people just sitting still and remaining silent, when it was clear most of them wanted to be doing anything but.

Now he thought for the first time that the Lanshi was actually quite serene and he found himself appreciating the Lan sect’s taste for sparse but tasteful furnishings.

He watched as Lan Qiren finally lay down his brush and put the paper away to dry. Then he took up some other pages he seemed to have prepared at his side and wordlessly made his way down from the raised platform at the front of the classroom, handing them to Wei Wuxian.

They turned out to be Wei Wuxian’s own test from last week. It had covered a cultivator’s proper conduct during nighthunt investigations and from the looks of it, Wei Wuxian had gained full marks even if Lan Qiren had remarked at the end that he had the tendency to ignore local authority structures in favor of making use of civilian informants and thus was in danger of missing out on logistical and administrative information only local governors or sect leaders would know.

Wei Wuxian raised his head to look up at his teacher in question. In light of what Wei Wuxian had done just earlier, surely the old man wouldn’t just want to discuss his test results with him?

Lan Qiren was strangely silent, not looking at Wei Wuxian but out the far end windows of the Lanshi that opened to show a large pine tree, swaying slightly in the mountain breeze.

Finally, he turned around to face Wei Wuxian, who had actually begun to feel a bit disconcerted by now.

“Wei Wuxian,” he started, and Wei Wuxian felt his spine straighten for maybe the first time ever in response to his teacher’s address.

Lan Qiren usually talked to him with some amount of scorn, yet now he couldn’t place his tone of voice at all.

“Under all your frivolities and your penchant for mischief you are one of the brightest minds of your generation. It puzzles me how you have acquired knowledge far exceeding that of most of your peers but seem so wholly uninclined to pay proper attention to your teachers.”

He turned around and sat back down behind his desk, placing his hands calmly on his knees and focusing all his attention back on Wei Wuxian.

“I am concerned where your mind might wander when left to its own devices.”

Really, after last night Wei Wuxian had to agree with his teacher’s opinion wholeheartedly.

“I found myself reminded of the first day of the guest disciple lectures today, when you once again left class without being instructed to do so. I have thus far assumed you simply enjoy scandalizing your audience and I couldn’t help but to disapprove heavily, as such behavior demands strict correction.” He thoughtfully stroked his beard, still not looking away.

Wei Wuxian was suddenly reminded of Lan Wangji’s intensity and thought it must be something he got from his uncle.

“I believed that you were after the laughter, the bafflement and outrage of people around you and that you had little inhibitions when it came to what you would resort to in order to obtain those things.“

Wei Wuxian grew puzzled. Why was the old man explaining himself to him?

“Yet I have noticed today how you couldn’t help but correct the heir to the Baling Ouyang clan when he failed to answer correctly. If you thought your whispering enough to deceive a cultivator’s hearing, I would recommend you read up on texts discussing the golden core and its sense-enhancing qualities.” He finally broke their eye contact to clear his throat in a dignified manner.

“And after that, when others chose to embarrass themselves instead of admitting they didn’t know the answer to the next question, you seemed to have an epiphany and ran out of the classroom. So, tell me honestly, Wei Wuxian. How bored are you precisely during the guest disciple lectures?”

“I...” Wei Wuxian was brought up short.

This was honestly the last question he had expected Lan Qiren to ever ask him. This was a completely different conversation than the one he came here prepared to have!

Yet the old man just sat there quietly and waited for him to speak. Madam Yu had often reprimanded him to not talk back to his teachers if he knew what was good for him. Which had admittedly never stopped him much before.

He had always assumed Lan Qiren would be the kind of man to agree to such a sentiment.

That he could even consider whether his own lectures might be boring was nothing Wei Wuxian had deemed possible. But since his teacher seemed serious, he thought about it for a bit and decided to answer him honestly.

“Kindly, xiansheng, I think the guest lectures are appropriate for teaching the basics of cultivation theory, a solid grasp on history and politics, as well as pointing out gaps in your sutdents' education. However—” he stopped again, trying to gauge what the teacher expected him to say. Lan Qiren’s face revealed nothing though.

Really, the familial relation between him and his younger nephew had never been more apparent!

“If you are asking this student personally whether he feels challenged sufficiently... then he can’t honestly claim that to be the case.”

Involuntarily, he held his breath.

Had he dared to proclaim such a thing at home this would be the moment Madam Yu would start screaming at him, about what gave him the idea he could afford to be so disrespectful, and that he should feel grateful they were giving him an education at all, him being just a servant’s son and all that.

But Lan Qiren just seemed thoughtful and didn’t immediately respond.

After quite a while during which the man seemed to be contemplating something, he cleared his throat and asked, “Would you say your restless fidgeting in class, your bad habit of distracting other students to jest around during it and your tendency to adapt any questions you get asked to fit a wider context than the question originally posed so that you can discuss it far beyond the teacher’s intended scope, are direct consequences of this boredom?”

...Was that the case?

Wei Wuxian couldn’t quite say.

He loved fooling around with friends and theorizing about everything and anything.

But in a hypothetical scenario where his classes were covering things he didn’t already know and were engaging enough to hold his interest for longer, he thought he wouldn’t mind behaving in class, as long as there was still time to stretch his legs afterwards.

“Well… I guess they might be?” he mused.

He found himself reminded of what he had thought about earlier.

“Back home, it's often like that as well. The Jiang sect has a talisman master and I love it when he has time to teach me. But since the Jiang sect focuses on swordsmanship and archery, as xiansheng is certainly aware, what he knows is not covered in classes and it's not really encouraged that I seek him out as much as I’d like to. I’m the head disciple so I guess it makes sense that I can’t just indulge in my own hobbies whenever the fancy strikes me though.”

Lan Qiren just hummed. Wei Wuxian suddenly remembered Jiang Cheng’s warning from earlier and felt the need to add, “But I’m still grateful I have the opportunity to attend classes here. I know the Lan sect probably made an exception for me on behalf of Jiang-shushu’s request.”

“While that is certainly true, a junior disciple of your potential would have gotten this opportunity regardless of your background. After all, it was once your own parents’ brilliance that garnered them their own invitations,” the old man clarified.

Wei Wuxian perked up. “Really?”

He had known that his mother had attended the lectures in her own youth and that Lan Qiren supposedly hadn’t liked her very much. But he knew even less about his father than about his mother, the only things he had ever heard about his parents beeing Madam Yu's scalding remarks about them.

“I didn’t know my father also attended,” he couldn’t help but wonder, looking up at Lan Qiren with big eyes.

Every little thing he learned about the two people that had brought him into this world was infinitely precious to him. He had been too young when they died to remember them much and the people who remembered them tended to avoid speaking about them.

He had also assumed he had only been able to attend the lectures thanks to Jiang Fengmian’s doing.

It turned out he would have apparently gotten an invitation anyway!

Lan Qiren regarded him with a somber frown.

“It is a child’s filial duty to honor their parents appropriately and guard their memory after they have passed. Didn’t Jiang Fengmian talk to you about them?”

Wei Wuxian hesitated. He didn’t want to say anything about the man who had saved him from a life on the streets that might be perceived as negative. After all, Jiang-shushu might not want to remember what surely made him sad himself, so he couldn’t really blame him. Wei Wuxian’s parents had been his friends after all.

Yet somehow, he felt he could trust Lan Qiren to not twist his words.

Had someone told him only yesterday he would feel tempted to confide in the old man he would have laughed in their face. But this conversation had been so far removed from all interactions he'd had with his stern teacher prior to this.

So, he chose to take the risk.

“It's also not encouraged back home that I bother my sect leader with sentimentalities,” he chose to say.

Lan Qiren gave him a long look. Then he sighed and looked out of the window again.

“I have misjudged you, Wei Wuxian. I think it is appropriate that I apologize,” he finally said.

Wei Wuxian blinked wildly, sure he had misheard somehow.

“Erm… what is xiansheng apologizing for?” he asked.

His head whirled. Really, these Lans were not good for his heart.

“My opinion of you was clouded by the prejudices I had, and before today I have not attempted to understand the root of your troubles.”

Wei Wuxian honestly thought calling it him having troubles was maybe a bit much.

“Now it seems clear to me that what I assumed was an intent to aggravate others is instead the result of a certain lack of parental guidance. The public seems to be of the mind that your sect leader shows you disproportionate favor. That certainly can’t be the full truth if he withheld your parents’ memory from you.”

Well... that was quite the bold thing to say.

Wei Wuxian had thought Lan Qiren to be someone who adhered rigidly and pedantically to social rules and their niceties, even if that could on occasion falsify the intention of one’s statements.

It seemed his teacher wasn’t the only one who had blindly believed things he had heard from somewhere.

“I won’t let this stand,” Lan Qiren continued. “I don’t have time today since I have other duties to tend to this afternoon. But if you are interested, I wouldn’t be opposed to telling you what I know about Cangse Sanren and Wei Changze. I can’t claim to have known them very well, but I still spent a year as their classmate.”

“I’d like that very much,” Wei Wuxian quickly responded, eyes wide.

He wouldn’t turn up his nose faced with such a golden opportunity. Lan Qiren nodded and stood, signaling him to do the same.

“It is decided then. And I would ask you to stay behind after the lectures tomorrow. There has never been a student I couldn’t improve, and you certainly won’t be the first. I will work out something to counter your underchallenge. Your intellectual brilliance should be nurtured.”

With those words Lan Qiren dismissed him, so Wei Wuxian bowed and walked to the doors, thoughts still whirring inside his head and a strange warmth growing in his chest. Just as he was about to cross the threshold his teacher called out to him again.

“Wei Wuxian. Xichen tells me you have befriended Wangji. Can you confirm this?”

And that was all it took, to have his heart rabbiting in his chest again.

His talk with Lan Qiren had successfully taken his mind off the things that had actually caused him to bolt out of class that morning.

He gulped, took one deep breath and turned around again, hoping Lan Qiren wouldn’t notice the nerves in his expression.

“I don’t really know if your nephew would agree. But I’d certainly like that to be true,” he chose to say, not sure where Lan Wangji’s older brother had gained the impression.

Certainly, it was very unlikely that Lan Wangji had said such a thing to his brother himself?

“Wangji has long valued his solitude,” Lan Qiren went on. “But if you indeed started to get along, I ask you to not disrupt his studies and to treat him well.”

“Yes, of course. Lan Zhan deserves only the best,” he said and felt his face get hot, remembering how he had only recently disrespected Lan Wangji.

Merely in his sleep, but still.

At that Lan Qiren seemed to study him for a moment—to ascertain his honesty perhaps? Whatever he saw seemed to satisfy him.

“Very well, I will take your word for it. I think it is nearly time you join Wangji for your punishment. We will speak tomorrow after class.”

_______

There was a tight feeling in Wei Wuxian's chest as he walked to the library pavilion. He had hurried to find Jiang Cheng who had been a loyal shidi and had indeed saved him a bun from lunch. Wei Wuxian was glad to at least have something in his stomach to confront what he had been dreading since last night.

Being hungry on top of everything already going on in his head would have only made things worse.

His conversation with Lan Qiren had been way more pleasant than anticipated at least. But even though the old man had pleasantly surprised him, what he had said had also been confusing and kind of agitating.

The Lan clan was truly out to get him today!

Most importantly though, he urgently needed a counter measure against the nervous feelings occupying him in Lan Wangji’s vicinity. Wei Wuxian didn’t know how he would survive his punishment otherwise!

So, while he was walking extra slowly towards the library pavilion to put off his arrival a bit, he chose to come up with a plan.

In general, he was of the mind that a dream, especially a dream of this variety, shouldn’t concern one overly much as the human mind thought about all kinds of crazy things sometimes and you couldn’t always take everything completely seriously.

This particular dream however had been way too long, way too detailed and also way too realistic to just be some crazy concoction his mind had spun together because he had eaten too much the night before or something.

This being the case, Wei Wuxian couldn’t deny that he was also quite curious now that everything had started to settle a bit inside him.

After all, whenever something truly surprised him, he couldn’t help but poke at it until he understood the matter even if that matter seemed to be his own thoughts this time.

To begin his investigation, Wei Wuxian could think of three theories to help him explain the dream he'd had.

One; It really had just been a fluke. Whatever had caused him to imagine Lan Wangji in such a light would never come to pass again and once Wei Wuxian had calmed down a bit everything would turn back to how things had been before. He couldn’t deny that this theory didn't really feel that convincing though.

Two; Something beyond his own self had been at play here. Maybe some curse or creature had infused him with lustful thoughts and the object of those desires had been chosen kind of randomly. Maybe Lan Wangji had been the last person Wei Wuxian had thought about yesterday before falling asleep? The thought made him blush again.

Or three; And this was hard to consider, but it had to be done, in the name of discovering the truth—Wei Wuxian might simply be a cutsleeve and one that had taken a liking to the second young master of the Lan sect. (More like, yearned to be taken by him like a woman, wished to be dominated by him in a sexual way like some—like some kind of—he didn’t even know!)

“Aiyo, seriously, what’s up with me?” he whined with a steaming face, slapping it a few times.

Wei Wuxian thought he must have blushed more in the last few shichen than in his entire life before this! Who was he, some flustered maiden?!

Were the first theory true then this matter would resolve itself. However, something itched under his skin, something urged him to react someway.

The second theory was perhaps the most interesting one, but since Wei Wuxian hadn’t gone nighthunting in some time and it was also rather unlikely someone in the Cloud Recesses was so incredibly bored and weird they chose to curse him with random perverted dreams—seriously, what would even be the benefit of that— he had to admit that he couldn’t imagine any scenario where his dream was the result of such a thing.

Brooding, Wei Wuxian rounded the bend after which the library pavilion came into view.

So that left the third theory.

But how was he supposed to find out whether he was interested in Lan Wangji like that? How did this work? Shouldn’t he just know?!

In any case, he didn’t think the library was the best place to investigate his hypothetical desires.

He would need to get Lan Wangji alone, somewhere where the other didn’t interpret everything Wei Wuxian said or did as him attempting to avoid his punishment or get into trouble.

It had become abundantly clear over the last few weeks that Lan Wangji would not indulge him in such endeavors.

So, Wei Wuxian had to get Lan Wangji to go some place alone with him.

Voluntarily.

Well, that was quite the hurdle!

Wei Wuxian had certainly invited Lan Wangji to all kinds of places and activities recently only to be cruelly rejected each and every time.

But he hadn’t grown up in the Jiang sect for nothing! He wouldn’t let himself be defeated by Lan Wangji’s lack of enthusiasm!

With a plan beginning to form inside his head he took one final deep breath and began to approach the library.

It was time to stop running away!

_______

Lan Wangji was already in his usual seat as Wei Wuxian joined him. He was sitting straight with perfect posture, one hand holding back his sleeve, the other gracefully taking notes on what looked to be some kind of old scripture or poetry.

Wei Wuxian plastered a big grin on his face and tried to make his gait as confident as ever.

“Hey, Lan Zhan, thanks for waiting!” he called, proud how even his voice came out while his heart had decided to betray him by picking up its pace again already.

Lan Wangji looked up from the text he had studied and fixed Wei Wuxian with inscutable eyes.

The latter felt abruptly tempted to freeze like some kind of animal of prey but then Lan Wangji just nodded and somehow managed to instruct Wei Wuxian to go to his own writing desk with only one brief meaningful glace in its direction.

“Ah, yes of course!” Wei Wuxian shouldered through his haze, forcing himself to stop simply gawking at Lan Wangji like an idiot.

He quickly made his way to his own seat where the book of rules already lay for him to copy out of.

“You’ll be surprised, Lan Zhan!” he said with more confidence than he felt. “I decided to behave today. I have a favor I want to ask of you and I hope you’ll listen to this humble classmate if he is as diligent as Lan-er-gongzi demands for once.”

Lan Wangji let out a hum which rang slightly dubious. He turned a page in his book and, without glancing at Wei Wuxian, he ordered, “Start copying,” effectively ending their conversation.

There! That was exactly what Wei Wuxian had meant!

With a pout Wei Wuxian pulled the rule book towards himself even though he could probably manage to write out almost all three thousand rules from memory by now.

Wasn't Lan Wangji a bit too uncooperative? He hadn't even answered him properly!

But this was no matter.

Wei Wuxian simply had to prove that he was serious this time and then Lan Wangji would be bound by honor to at least hear him out!

Honestly, big brother Lan, where on earth did you get the idea that Lan Wangji wanted to be friends?

Determined, Wei Wuxian began writing furiously. The earlier he finished the better, lest Lan Wangji tried weaseling his way out of listening to him because his sect's dumb curfew was approaching or something.

Even as Wei Wuxian's wrist started cramping, he refused to slow down.

His chance of success was slim as it was, so he had to give it his all! Picking up where he had left off the previous day, he abandoned the original completely and started to rely on his own recollection. He grew a bit disappointed with himself for having actually allowed such a ridiculous number of precepts to be ingrained in his mind, but after weeks of writing the same thing down over and over again it really couldn’t be helped.

As the sun wandered through the sky, turning the shadow of the magnolia tree outside the pavilion’s window longer and the late afternoon air colder, a substantial pile of paper had appeared on Wei Wuxian’s table.

His hand would start falling off soon but he was so close!

2984… 2990… 2999…

“3000!” he exclaimed, proudly slapping his brush down on its stand. With a relieved groan he raised his tired arms into the air and stretched his back to relieve some tension.

“That’s all for today, Lan Zhan! I’d say I must have broken some record. Whoever claimed to be the fastest at copying up until now, from now on they’ll have to be satisfied with second place!”

In front of him Lan Wangji carefully lay down some other scripture with a dark green cover that Wei Wuxian hadn’t noticed him switching to, so Wei Wuxian gathered his pile and carried his copies over to him.

Lan Wangji sighed almost imperceptibly upon seeing the page on top.

“Your writing is messy,” he said but still briefly flipped through the pile to ascertain that there were the required number of pages.

“But efficient,” Wei Wuxian felt the need to add. “It’s not like I’m copying for public use. This still serves its purpose.”

Lan Wangji didn’t nod but also didn’t disagree so Wei Wuxian thought of it as a win.

A bit nervous and quite a bit excited he crouched down before Lan Wangji’s writing desk, trying to ignore how the details of his surroundings reminded him of what had happened in this room last night in his head.

He wouldn’t let himself get distracted!

“Lan Zhan,” he began and couldn’t help but smile when Lan Wangji just watched him and let him talk.

“As I’ve already mentioned, there is a favor I want to ask of you. You’d make me infinitely happy if you helped me out.”

Lan Wangji’s face didn’t really change, but he still seemed kind of wary.

Wei Wuxian decided to cut to the chase.

“You see, I had quite the talk with your uncle earlier. You might have heard he wanted to speak to me after class and I thought he would maybe finally kick me out because of that stunt I pulled in the lectures this morning, but that actually wasn’t what happened at all! We talked about other things as well but at one point he offered to tell me about my parents since he shared classes with them for a year and all that.”

He thought Lan Wangji looked vaguely surprised.

“And... well, to be honest with you, that’s kind of a big deal for me. I don’t know if you know since you Lans are not supposed to gossip, but they died when I was really young. And I don’t remember a lot about them.”

He suppressed the urge to squirm and deflect. He had never really talked to anyone about this, but he had to somehow get Lan Wangji to realize how genuine he was being so he forced himself to continue.

“I kind of don’t remember anything at all, really. Just small fragments of memories here and there. I couldn’t even tell you what they looked like. Isn’t that crazy? They could walk by me on the streets and I just wouldn’t recognize them! And since, well, there wasn’t really anyone up until now who was willing to do what your uncle offered to do and tell me about them...”

He scratched his head and dared to look up into Lan Wangji’s face to see if he could estimate the other's thoughts, but Lan Wangji’s features were as unfathombale as always.

Maybe a tiny bit softer around the edges.

“I really want to thank your uncle, but I don’t know him well at all. And I also have kind of a tight budget but I still want to get him something.”

Wei Wuxian put on the most pleading look he could muster and brought his hands up in front of him.

“Lan Zhan, would you accompany me down to Caiyi sometime next week and advise me on what your uncle might like as a present? I really have no clue at all and would embarrass myself terribly in front of your whole clan if you abandon me in this. Please, Lan Zhan! I’ll owe you something!”

If this didn’t work then Lan Wangji was really too tough to crack!

Wei Wuxian tried to radiate sincerity and trustworthiness. He felt tempted to grab Lan Wangji’s hands or arms but he was sure that wouldn’t really be an argument in his favor since Lan Wangji didn’t seem like a guy who appreciated it if you touched him without asking.

Lan Wangji remained still for some time.

Wei Wuxian was sure that it looked as if he was at least thinking about his plea. And he wasn’t being rejected outright either! If Lan Wangji thought something wasn’t worth his time, he would let you know immediately, right?

So, Wei Wuxian had a chance.

Right?

Finally, Lan Wangji lowered his eyes to his own lap, smoothed over his pretty embroidered outer robe with his hand even though the garment already lay wrinkle-free and spotless, and said, “I have time the day after tomorrow in the afternoon. Should you finish your punishment early enough that day, then we may go.”

Yes!!!

Wei Wuxian was brilliant! And two sentences, too!

Lan Wangji stood, gathered his papers and nodded once.

Astonishingly, Wei Wuxian thought he looked a tiny, tiny bit flustered.

Maybe.

“Good evening,” Lan Wangji stated and with that he turned and left the pavilion with his usual moderate pace that somehow still let him walk faster than the average person. Probably a side-effect of growing up in the Cloud Recesses, where you weren’t allowed to run.

Wei Wuxian was still staring after him long after he was gone. Then he stood slowly and a big grin spread on his face that he couldn’t have stopped had his life depended on it.

“YES!” he exclaimed out loud this time and couldn’t help but laugh.

He had done it!

He had gotten Lan Wangji to agree to an outing in Caiyi with him! He had beaten the odds!

His heart was hammering in his chest but for the first time since last night this just made him laugh even more loudly.

_______

So.

Wei Wuxian wasn’t stupid.

He would even call himself quite sharp on most days.

Though he was perhaps a bit inexperienced when it came to matters of the heart, even before last night he had known that he thought about Lan Wangji differently than about others.

Up until now he had always assumed he simply enjoyed the challenge of making him show any emotion besides indifference. Lan Wangji’s obvious ability and intelligence had intrigued him as well, since these days it was hard for Wei Wuxian to chance upon someone that evenly matched him in his age-group.

Wei Wuxian wasn’t stupid though.

He was pretty sure that if that was all there really was to it, then he probably wouldn’t have reacted so vehemently to that dream, right?

He wouldn’t always feel so happy every time Lan Wangji deigned to spare him a glance, so effusively happy to have him finally agree to spending time together.

Wei Wuxian knew that he had to face the possibility that what he felt for Lan Wangji wasn’t quite as ordinary as he had assumed.

That he probably had—and oh heavens, that was still strange to think—what one might call a crush on Lan Wangji.

Something about the thought made him giggle.

He was on his way back to the dormitories, planning to find his friends to go take dinner.

Who could have imagined his time in the Cloud Recesses would take such a turn?

Certainly not him.

Yet, despite everything, the thought felt right somehow. Even if the chance of getting his heart horribly broken was not inconsequential, something about admitting this to himself almost felt like a relief. Like there had been a weight on his shoulders he hadn’t even noticed before that had now been removed.

As he approached the room he shared with Jiang Cheng, he could already hear Nie Huaisang’s whining voice inside.

Grinning and still floating on the good feeling of hearing Lan Wangji agree to going shopping together Wei Wuxian pushed open the door as fast as he could without knocking, successfully startling Huaisang into screeching and flinging his fan in his approximate direction.

“You bastard, what is wrong with your head?” Jiang Cheng cursed, throwing an empty peanut shell at him that Wei Wuxian easily batted aside.

“Wei-xiong, you’ll curse me into an early grave!” Nie Huaisang wailed, dramatically clutching his hand to his chest. “I'm way too young and nubile to die!”

Chuckling, Wei Wuxian bent down to pick up the fan and handed it back to Huaisang who immediately flipped it open to hide half his face behind it.

“You look happy, I reckon Lan Qiren didn’t kick you out? Or are you happy because he did kick you out?”

“Aiyo, Nie-xiong! Do I look like such a lazy person that I’d be happy to be given the boot? Lan Qiren was fine, let’s not talk about that stuffy old man. I'm starving and deliberately hurried to finish copying today so I’d have enough time to stuff my face this evening!”

He flung his arm over Jiang Cheng’s shoulders who had risen to store whatever book he'd been reading by his bed.

“You must truly be starving to manage longing for that rabbit food the Lan sect calls a healthy diet,” his shidi grumbled, shoving Wei Wuxian off of him since the latter had started to lean all his weight against his sect-brother in order to topple him over.

“We could always buy spices in town,” Wei Wuxian thought out loud after jumping around to regain his balance. “In fact, I’ll be in town the day after tomorrow! Jiang Cheng, if you lend me some money, I’ll get you something good!”

“You wish!" Jiang Cheng scoffed while the three of them started to make their way through the hallways of the public parts of the Cloud Recesses. "Wei Wuxian, you still owe me for that time you bought that ridiculous trinket just because the granny selling it told you a fairytale about her poor sick grandchild.”

“It wasn’t a trinket, it was a bracelet her sick grandchild had braided, she hardly wanted any money for it—don’t be so stingy Jiang Cheng!”

“Wait, the day after tomorrow? But we have to take the genealogy exam the day after that! Don’t tell me you won’t study again?”

Wei Wuxian had honestly forgotten about that exam.

He hadn’t really needed to study for the tests they took in the Cloud Recesses so far in order to still pass without any trouble.

But since that fact always aggravated Jiang Cheng Wei Wuxian chose not to remind him.

“What do you want in Caiyi anyways? Emperor's Smile?” Nie Huaisang joined the discussion. “Or do you have some errand to run? Are you perhaps willing to fetch an order I have placed at Chuntian-Arts for me? The owner notified me that my books have arrived but I haven’t had the opportunity yet.”

Wei Wuxian grinned. He knew from Nie Huaisang’s own mouth that the owner of that particular store dealt in all kinds of art, especially that of the erotic variety if one knew what to ask for.

Which Nie Huaisang did.

Actually, that gave him an idea.

Pretending to think about it he brought his hand up to his chin and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Nie-xiong, my friend. In this cruel and cold world scarcely anything ever comes for free. But no worries! I'm very amenable to bribery!”

“Aiya, you're so shrewd, Wei-xiong. Shouldn’t such humble services come with the fact that I have graciously gifted you my eternal friendship? Is it not a simple act of loyalty?”

The three had arrived at the dining hall where most of the sect heirs had not yet taken a seat and were still waiting for friends to arrive or loitering around for some other reason.

“What loyalty?” Wei Wuxian asked, pretending to be scandalized. Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes and went past them to join the ones who were already filling their bowls.

“Is the loyalty of others not something you earn yourself? By showing another that you won’t cruelly exploit their vast kindness without giving in return?”

“Well, Wei-xiong, it’s not like I'm not open to negotiation. You know I deal in fairness. Name your price.”

Wei Wuxian glanced around but the hall was filling up with more and more students now and even though he was known for his shamelessness he still wanted a bit more privacy for this.

“I’ll tell you tonight,” he said conspiratorially, waggled his eyebrows, then hurried after Jiang Cheng lest all the at least moderately edible things were snatched up before he had his turn.

_______

Wei Wuxian was rushing through the dormitory’s hallways as silently as his feet would carry him.

He had quite a lot of experience reaching the rooms of the Nie delegation without notifying the night patrol of his presence, knew which nooks and alcoves would successfully obscure a teenager sneaking around in the darkness.

Only when Lan Wangji was on patrol duty was it truly challenging not to be discovered.

After arriving to Nie Huaisang’s room he quietly knocked their trio’s coded signal against the door.

At first nothing could be heard until there was the sound of rustling and then Nie Huaisang’s face appeared, freshly washed hair wrapped up inside an elegant towel-construction.

“Well, well, well, what a pleasant surprise,” he whispered and pulled Wei Wuxian into his room with surprising arm strength.

After they had closed the door and plastered the walls with silencing talismans, Wei Wuxian plopped himself onto the unoccupied bed and pulled off his boots and outer robe to get comfortable.

Since the second young master of the Nie sect had had to repeat the lectures after failing the final exam last year, he'd had a lot of time to improve the room to his tastes. In comparison to the Jiangs' quarters it was rather homely and Wei Wuxian preferred spending his time here by far.

He had sometimes wondered whether Nie-xiong hadn’t failed his exams on purpose to avoid his responsibilities and having to train with his saber under his big brother’s thumb to instead spend another leisurely year dallying around the serene Cloud Recesses.

But even if that was the case, he wouldn’t out his friend’s scheme to the world, instead happily giving him the benefit of the doubt.

“So, Wei-xiong,” Nie Huaisang began, getting comfortable on his own bed and fixing Wei Wuxian with eager eyes. “You have come here to submit a trade offer to me. After so coldly leaving your poor friend hanging earlier, I expect something good.”

He had produced a fan from somewhere in his bedding that Wei Wuxian hadn’t seen before and started leisurely fanning himself.

Wei Wuxian decided to get to the crux of the matter immediately.

In his experience, there was no real point to withholding information from Nie Huaisang. If he really wanted to know something, he would probably know eventually.

“I had a dream last night,” Wei Wuxian confessed, trying to keep his voice casual. “About a guy.”

Nie Huaisang’s eyebrows climbed up his forehead, though shortly afterwards he smirked like the cat that ate the canary.

“A dream you say,” he simpered kind of knowingly, forcing Wei Wuxian to elaborate.

“Hargh, Nie-xiong, you are truly cold-hearted!” Wei Wuxian let himself fall backwards, spreading his arms out like a starfish and staring up at the wooden ceiling.

“A dream. Yes. Really filthy.”

“Ah, Wei-xiong, I'm so glad I decided to befriend you! Sometimes, you’re the only entertainment my pour parched soul gets in this rigid place! So, did you confess? Has Lan Wangji rejected you already?”

Wei Wuxian shot upright. “How did you know?!”

Nie Huaisang looked as smug as it was possible to look. “Well, you just told me yourself.”

Groaning, Wei Wuxian fell back against the mattress and pouted.

“And I made an educated guess. Really, there aren’t a lot of guys around here who you seek out like some kind of enamored duckling, Wei-xiong. Ever heard of little boys pulling on girls’ pigtails to get their attention? That was you, literally since your first day here, whenever Lan-er-gongzi so much as appeared in your field of vision somewhere. Guys you started calling by their birth name days after meeting them. So, unless you’re here to confess your undying love to me—in which case I’d be truly honored but would have to savagely break your youthful heart—there really aren’t that many likely options.”

Wei Wuxian threw a pillow in Nie Huaisang’s direction, but missed on purpose.

He still needed Nie-xiong’s goodwill after all.

“Aiyo, really, Wei-xiong!” Nie Huaisang rubbed his shoulder as if he had been hit. “So, what happened? Don’t tell me this is the reason the old man spoke to you earlier? Did he happen to notice your yearning glances? How are you still alive? Seriously, if you’re a ghost, please note that I'm not at all equipped or willing to deal with you.”

“Nothing happened,” Wei Wuxian grumbled. “It’s just, the dream was kind of…”

He felt himself turning red again. Nie Huaisang’s grin turned somehow even wider.

“I need reference material," he quickly added. "I’m not sure if you have something from that corner, but I guess I thought I might as well ask.”

“What did you have in mind? Exactly how filthy are we talking here?” Nie Huaisang’s eyes gained a calculating glimmer.

Wei Wuxian knew his friend liked to distribute pieces of his collection based on the receiver’s particular interest. He seemed to consider himself to be some sort of connoisseur, but most importantly it was probably the perfect opportunity to gather new gossip.

He knew that Jiang Cheng, after he'd had enough alcohol to not be too scandalized being offered porn, often got erotic stories in which the female lead was some sort of demure flower who Wei Wuxian secretly found never really seemed to have much of a personality of her own.

He himself had liked stories with intrinsic worldbuilding and unusual and wild characters. He enjoyed strong-willed women, courageous men and fights with sexual tension. So far though, the stories he had read hadn’t really been overtly sexual. Most of the time there was only some conclusional sex scene at the end.

No wonder Nie Huaisang asked for clarification.

Wei Wuxian himself was the one most baffled by his own dream’s filthiness!

“Like... really, really filthy,” he admitted. He wasn’t that keen on going into detail since his face wasn’t actually thick enough for that in spite of his shameless reputation.

He also didn’t actually know how flithy things could even get between two men.

But it had felt filthy.

Wei Wuxian had never considered himself to be inclined to such filth!

“Haaah, they really grow up so fast,” Nie Huaisang sighed, even though he was merely a few months older than Wei Wuxian.

He rolled around on his bed until he could comfortably reach a box that had been placed inconspicuously underneath it without having to stand. It was adorned with the Nie sect’s beast head crest, looking like an ordinary repository for ribbons or such things, way too official and mundane looking to evoke any kind of suspicion.

Wei Wuxian felt honored to be allowed to witness Nie Huaisang’s secret stash’s hiding place.

One of them at least.

When his friend opened the box several qiankun-pouches appeared.

“Let me see if I have something for you.”

Nie Huaisang let his hand wander over his collection as though he was uncertain before he decisively grabbed a yellow pouch and promptly emptied its contents onto his bed. He snatched up one of the thinner books that had tumbled out and motioned for Wei Wuxian to come over to get it himself.

“These types aren’t as easy to get as the usual fair. I dare you to wrinkle even one page,” he told Wei Wuxian, while the latter took the book und lowered himself again, this time on the floor by Huaisang’s feet.

The small book appeared to be a compilation of some kind or maybe an instruction manual. It was titled, Fervent Sacrilege. The Collection, and the cover simply showed a slim man with dark eyes gazing through what appeared to be a gauze curtain which let one only guess at his silhouette.

“Take a look and then tell me exactly what filthy things featured in this dream you had about Lan-er-gongzi last night. I can’t imagine you turned that wild while I wasn’t looking and I don’t want to traumatize your poor virgin eyes,” Nie Huaisang demanded, rolling onto his side and casually leaning his head on one elbow to look at him expectantly.

“Seriously, Nie-xiong, sometimes I truly don’t get how people call me shameless, when you are right here,” Wei Wuxian mumbled, starting to leaf through the first few pages.

It started relatively tame.

The men were shown embracing each other while wearing more or less clothing, kissing and finally pleasuring each other with their hands.

Finally, there were two pages dedicated to a masterly ink drawing of a youth kneeling before an older man, taking him into his mouth with a blissful expression on his face.

Wei Wuxian took some time to admire the artistry.

So far, the whole thing actually didn’t feel all that different to the pictures between men and women he had seen before.

He turned to the next page and suddenly there it was.

...Kind of.

The pictures showed the same couple from different angles, each time in slightly different poses.

One of them was lying on the ground, legs apart and wrapped around the other man’s waist while their hands were entangled with one another’s hair or caressing each other’s backs and faces.

The man on top rested between the other’s thighs, yet the viewer couldn’t see exactly where they were joined, even though there really weren’t that many options down there.

Wei Wuxian hesitated.

Technically, he supposed his dream hadn’t gone further than this, yet the way the drawn man on top seemed to behave so tenderly and carefully towards his receiving partner made the picture appear way tamer in Wei Wuxian’s eyes than what Lan Wangji had done to him.

No, careful or tender really weren’t the right words to describe how he had behaved.

The man on his back still had free range of his hands as well, while Wei Wuxian’s wrists had been bound so tightly with Lan Wangji’s forehead ribbon that his skin had been chafed in the end.

He cleared his throat, trying not to let his face show that that hadn’t been the worst thing in the world actually.

No, Lan Wangji snapping and taking charge like that, just taking and taking as if Wei Wuxian existed only for his pleasure and nothing more, that had made him—had actually been really—

“So, this one, then?” Nie Huaisang asked, ripping Wei Wuxian out of his damning thoughts.

“Ah… well, erm.” Wei Wuxian looked back down at the illustration.

No, it really didn’t seem like enough.

“Well, it was this, technically. But do you have something where the one… er, the one on top isn’t so... so gentle?”

Heavens, he had actually said it out loud.

He didn't quite know why admitting to this felt considerably different than merely speaking about appreciating one's own gender.

Nie Huaisang regarded him for a short moment before he flipped his fan open again, leaving only his eyes visible.

Wei Wuxian suspected he had to hide a truly unseemly smirk this time.

“Wei-xiong, I’ve always greatly appreciated your honesty,” he said, snatching the collection back and ruffling through the other things he had not yet bothered to return to their pouch.

Finally, he handed Wei Wuxian a small box out of which one could pull a paper scroll.

It was painted with an elaborate pattern and on the side of the lid the title Heavenly Nexus had been carved and painted in a deep blue.

Wei Wuxian pulled at the tassel that let the scroll inside unfold and promptly sucked in a sharp breath.

One might argue that the picture that had appeared was quite similar to the one from just now.

Logistically speaking, the important parts seemed to be in the same places.

The scene's atmosphere was completely different though.

The man on top had a fierce and ravenous expression and while one large hand pushed one of his partner’s dainty legs up to his chest, further than really seemed comfortable, the other was tightly gripping his silky hair and forcing his head to tilt and his long neck to be displayed for teeth to bite and bruise. The man on the bottom had his hands bound tightly by some kind of cord and tied to what appeared to be a bedpost. Tears were streaming down his cheeks, yet his mouth was opened on a moan that appeared to be quite sensual.

Wei Wuxian let the scroll snap back into the box and slapped the lid shut.

“Yeah, like that,” he wheezed, trying to ignore Nie Huaisang’s snickering.

He quickly cleared his throat, put the box back onto the bed and made his way over to the other side of the room to get dressed again.

“I’ll pick up your order from Chuntian-Arts,” he said, turning around to face Nie Huaisang who to his credit at least pretended to not still be laughing at him.

“Thanks, Huaisang.”

“I do what I can, Wuxian, it was my pleasure to do business with you, as usual."

“Of course.”

Carefully, Wei Wuxian dismantled the silencing talismans with a swipe of his hand and listened at the door for a while. Since the coast seemed clear he glanced over his shoulder to whisper, “Goodnight. And really, thanks again.”

Nie Huaisang had already turned around in his bed and let out an exaggerated snore in answer.

Chuckling, Wei Wuxian waved out the candles and slipped back out into the night.

_______

Wei Wuxian had recovered his good cheer.

After all, tomorrow Lan Wangji would accompany him to Caiyi! Wei Wuxian was also quite curious what the old man would want to say to him after class today. Hopefully Lan Qiren’s benevolence hadn’t faded overnight.

Curiously, as Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng approached the Lanshi the next morning, there he was, standing like some sentry in front of the entrance. The students who had already arrived were all nervously bowing and scurrying around their teacher, obviously confused by his early arrival.

“Why is xiansheng already here?” Jiang Cheng wondered out loud. Then he noticed how the man was actually looking into their direction as though awaiting them. Or to be precise, awaiting the person next to him.

“Wei Wuxian, what did you do?” he hissed through gritted teeth, while the two went up to Lan Qiren and saluted.

Wei Wuxian had no idea.

He'd thought they would speak after the lectures. Had the old man expected him to forget and wanted to remind him? No, surely not?

Lan Qiren nodded to both of them, then instructed Jiang Cheng to go first and join the students already sitting at their desks. Jiang Cheng looked at Wei Wuxian for a short moment as though he was trying to communicate something—to not disgrace their sect any more than he had already, Wei Wuxian guessed.

As soon as Jiang Cheng had left, the old man said, "Follow me," starting to walk towards one of the hallways that led laterally away from the classroom and what choice did Wei Wuxian have?

The two went past the curious stares of the other sect heirs and for one heartbeat Wei Wuxian thought he felt Lan Wangji looking his way.

Lan Qiren led him through the hallway and into what seemed to be a small conference room which opened up to a garden.

“I know I said we would speak later," his teacher spoke up. "However, there is someone who wants to meet you herself and she only has the time this morning.”

Wei Wuxian curiously followed him into the garden and onto a well maintained wooden path that meandered through high hydrangea bushes as Lan Qiren glanced back at him to add, “I don’t believe one day of missing classes will have a big impact on your progress.”

Wei Wuxian wanted to respond, but just then the bushes gave way to a small gazebo behind which the terrain fell steeply to let people overlook part of the mountainside.

Right now, there was someone inside, gazing into the distance but turning around at the sound of their approach. The person was a tall, slim woman who wore quite plain robes which nonetheless indicated her unmistakably as a Lan sect senior of high standing. Wei Wuxian recognized the cloud embroidery of the Lan family on her forehead ribbon. She was a direct relative to Lan Wangji then! The solemn look at least was the same.

Wei Wuxian bowed to her, not sure what position and significance she held in the familial structure of the Cloud Recesses. Apart from the direct heirs not much was known about the Lans since they were quite the private family.

“This is the one, then?” the woman asked. Her voice was pleasantly low and steady. Clearly, she was used to speaking with a certain amount of authority.

Lan Qiren cleared his throat. “This is Wei Wuxian, the Jiangs' head disciple.”

“Wei Ying greets his senior,” Wei Wuxian introduced himself, fascinated by her calm countenance. Most female senior cultivators he had met so far, which admittedly weren’t all that many, all had a horrible temper.

Lan Qiren cleared his throat again. Was the old man nervous?

“Wei Wuxian, this is Lan Qingzhao. She is the leading master on talismans and arrays here in Cloud Recesses. I will leave you in her care today. Qingzhao, we will speak later.” With those words Lan Qiren saluted to her. Was she an older cousin of the old man's perhaps?

Lan Qingzhao gracefully returned the gesture and Lan Qiren turned with one meaningful scowl back to Wei Wuxian.

“My cousin did not make time in her busy schedule for your mischief. Conduct yourself respectfully.”

Jackpot.

Before Wei Wuxian could promise him anything, the old man had already made his way back to the the classroom. Left alone with a foreign Lan senior Wei Wuxian thought that, if this situation was indeed as it appeared, it might be wise to give further courtesy.

“Wei Ying is honored for the master's time,” he said politely, bowing again. As he looked up at her there was a small, almost unnoticeable smile on Lan Qingzhao’s face. Wei Wuxian wondered whether Lan Wangji would smile similarly. If he ever smiled.

“It has been quite a while since I was sent a student this young,” she mused and started walking down a different path that led further into the garden where elegant penjing pines were tastefully arranged around stone sculptures. “Come with me, Wei Wuxian. I want to measure the scope of your knowledge,” she instructed and Wei Wuxian hurried after her.

They arrived to stools and a table which had been carved out of white rock and Lan Qingzhao motioned for Wei Wuxian to sit down across from her.

A tea set had been placed on the tabletop prior to their arrival and Wei Wuxian hurried to pour the woman a cup, before filling one for himself.

Lan Qingzhao calmy accepted the offered beverage, took a sip and placed it back down before reaching into her wide sleeve. She produced a large parchment and spread it out beside the two cups.

What appeared was one of the most elaborate array designs Wei Wuxian had ever seen.

Actually, it strongly reminded him about an array he had once happened upon on a scroll in the Jiang sect’s library that some Jiang ancestor had collected during his travels! Wei Wuxian remembered reading that it had been the prototype to a powerful containment and protection array which an ancient sect had sold to the current emperor of the time to install within the imperial tombs. He had been disappointed that it had been the only scroll on the subject the Jiangs' library had held.

“I’ve seen something like this before,” he told Lan Qingzhao and didn’t manage to conceal the excitement in his voice.

“The one I’ve seen was intended to seal the imperial tombs some centuries ago. There...” he pointed to the eastern spiritiual vein connecting the focal point of the arrays third inner circle to the second character for earth that was enclosed within a powerful banishment incantation.

“It lacked this section. This version seems much improved, these spiritual veins would allow for a much smoother energy transit, I think. I suppose with such a variety of incantations against spiritual attacks, the imperial family must’ve had quite a lot of enemies in the cultivation world. I wonder to which time period this belongs... I don’t remember ever reading about such a conflict.”

Intrigued, he ran his index finger over the parchment, carefully not touching it.

“Such an unwieldy outer section though. This array probably only worked if seamlessly incorporated into the tomb’s floor and even then, the rooms' integrity had to have been impeccable. It’s not exactly practical to go into such delicacies since you just risk the whole thing shutting down from even a little bit of uncleanliness. With a purpose such as keeping away graverobbers and cultivators, I would suggest a more straightforward approach that is more simplistic but harder to disrupt.”

Now that he was thinking about it, he had to add, “Not every part is unsalvageable though. That wicked sixth section with the repelling spell should make for a sick puzzle for whoever wants to breach that. Do you know if anyone ever managed?”

He looked up from his musings, finding Lan Qingzhao watching him with inscrutable eyes. Abruptly, It occurred to him that the talisman master might not have intended for him to just start rambling out his thoughts.

“Ah, Wei Ying apologizes, was I not supposed to—”

Lan Qingzhao held up her hand, silencing him.

“How old are you, Wei Wuxian?” she wanted to know.

“This student is sixteen,” he responded, slightly puzzled why that was relevant.

The woman gained a thoughtful look. Then she asked, “What would the Jiang sect’s head disciple suggest, then?”

“Er, what would I suggest regarding…?” he had to inquire.

“The outer section,” she answered with an amused twinkle in her sharp eyes. “I will tell you that it did indeed happen how you said it might. The sect installed this array in the imperial tomb but since the geometry of the room’s tiles disrupted the fragile synchroneity of the outer section, the whole array turned dormant, as easy to breach as an unwarded paper screen window. The imperial tombs were robbed the second month after the array's installation and the emperor had the sect leader who sold it to him imprisoned and later beheaded, since one of the emptied graves had belonged to his beloved late wife.”

Wei Wuxian’s head whirled. He did not think he had ever heard a Lan speak so much so fast at once.

“So, since you were in the middle of dismantling that poor cultivator’s work just now, I would ask you to please continue. Let’s see if you can salvage this poor excuse of arrayal work into something more functional.”

Immediate excitement shot up Wei Wuxian’s spine.

He couldn’t help but beam up at Lan Qingzhao and after asking for some paper and coal, he promptly tried to straighten out the ancient array’s weak points. Lan Qingzhao let him work autonomously for the most part, but it became clear to Wei Wuxian very soon that the woman possessed a wealth of knowledge when it came to talismans, arrays and anything related.

When he had exhausted his own ideas regarding the improvability of the array design, she merely hummed and asked him indicative questions that opened up his mind to unimagined possibilities. He found that actually, his own level of knowledge must have been stagnating for some time now!

Wei Wuxian was elated. Never before had a real expert of his favorite cultivation branch taken the time to hear him out and teach him like this.

He'd had to accept early on that talismanic arts were a narrow field since not many cultivators had an interest in specializing in it. A lot of the time it included unglamorous desk work and even the most brilliant results often weren’t very flashy.

He had always counted himself lucky that the Jiang sect had a talisman master at all, even though the man was reluctant to let Wei Wuxian hang around him. It went against the explicit wishes of the first lady of the sect after all and no one would deny that Zidian was a scary weapon.

Wei Wuxian had tried to be as happy as he could teaching himself so far.

His enthusiasm reached its peak when Lan Qingzhao—appearing charmed by his exuberance for a topic she clearly had a penchant for herself—showed him a collection of cleaning talismans she had designed during the last year. She even went as far as splashing the tea from Wei Wuxian’s cup that had turned cold by now, onto her own clothes to demonstrate how one of them restored their initial state impeccably.

By that point Wei Wuxian had thrown most ceremonial rules for behavior between senior and junior out of the metaphorical window since he couldn’t hold himself back, excitedly leaning over the table to better see the result. The designs were crazily efficient, as tidily structured as their intended purpose and Wei Wuxian marveled at the congruity between the design and its effect.

“I can’t believe you managed to keep the sections arranged so energetically efficient, while they are still so pleasant to look at! I would’ve definitely gotten stuck with trying to keep the fire radicals from creating a backlash. I would've created a clump!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed ardently. “To simply redirect that energetic risk into controlled heat and thus managing to not only clean but also dry? So clever!” He admiringly held the talisman closer to his face, scanning the design with his eyes.

“As negligibly contained as the fire radicals are, this talisman must almost set off itself! How little spiritual energy does it need?” he asked without taking his eyes off the talisman.

When there was a sudden wetness splashing onto his thigh he yelped only to laugh as he realized Lan Qingzhao had emptied her own half full teacup on his robes this time. Eagerly, he aimed the talisman at the dark wet spot and activated it. As predicted, he only needed a tiny spark to set it off and dry his clothes again.

Lan Qingzhao watched as the wetness evaporated with fond eyes and then started sorting the designs that by now filled the table back into a neat pile.

“I haven’t yet tried out its usefulness with thicker fluids and other mixtures. Sweetened things like honey or certain foods might give it a bit more trouble,” she said thoughtfully, yet it was clear that she was satisfied with Wei Wuxian’s admiration.

Wei Wuxian wanted to start thinking how one might solve such an issue, when the bell indicating wushi and thus the start of lunchtime could be heard ringing. He hadn’t even noticed how quickly time had passed. Lan Qingzhao looked at the sun’s placement and rose from her seat.

“It is time to eat. I think the situation is as clear as it can get. You certainly possess the talent and the necessary passion to become very well-versed in the art of talismanry one day,” she said to him. “Wei Wuxian, I want you to attend my class this afternoon. The guest disciples usually have calligraphy lessons from weishi to the end of shenshi today. I will ask Qiren to exempt you.”

Surprised, Wei Wuxian asked, “Ah, but is that alright? My sect expects me to attend the official lectures for guests—wouldn’t I need to get my sect leader’s permission first? “

Lan Qianzhao waved at him to follow her and assured him while they were walking, “The sect’s that send their disciples to the lectures submit an application for their disciples to receive official testimony from the Lan sect that they have successfully passed the necessary exams to graduate. As long as you still take all the tests and pass the final exam, we are meeting the requirements that have been agreed upon.”

She turned her head to look at him, while Wei Wuxian thought that this was quite the loophole to justify skipping class.

“And Qiren tells me you won’t have much trouble achieving that. Apparently, your boredom induced mischief in class has exceeded tolerable levels.”

Wei Wuxian grinned sheepishly. “Oh, well... in hindsight, this one has probably been the source of a certain amount of my venerable teacher’s exasperation,” he admitted, scratching his neck.

Lan Qingzhao smiled her understated smile. “That is a correct analysis of the circumstances, young one.” Wei Wuxian thought there might even be amusement on Lan Qiren’s expense twinkling in her eyes.

They came to a halt at an intersection Wei Wuxian had only ever gone past before. Before them lay a large, ornamental stone gate behind which the private grounds of the Cloud Recesses started. Only sect members were permitted beyond this point. Lan Qingzhao motioned to a bench that stood half hidden underneath the low hanging branches of a weeping willow.

“Wait here at weishi, I will have someone come collect you. The sect’s classrooms are just beyond this gate. Let’s see how well you’ll be able to keep up. But first, go eat something,” she said to Wei Wuxian’s astonishment.

Would she actually bring him into the private area? Lan Wangji’s own rooms were somewhere behind that gate!

After he had saluted her, Wei Wuxian watched in astonishment as the talisman master passed through the gate and disappeared.

_______

When Wei Wuxian reached the great eating hall, all other guest disciples were already there and quietly eating something that looked very green and very much like an assortment of only steamed vegetables. Pulling a face, he went to grab his own portion and turned, searching for Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang with his eyes.

Some of the students tried to inconspicuously steal a glance at him, while some others were openly staring. Certainly, a lot of them must be wondering how much trouble he had to be in to be personally escorted by Lan Qiren gods-know-where.

He saw Jin Zixuan scoff in his direction and was half tempted to stick out his tongue at the peacock. If only they knew, instead of getting the discipline paddle, he had actually just spent one of the best mornings of his life!

He finally spotted his friends sitting a bit further down the hall, Jiang Cheng almost falling off his stool, as he tried to gain his attention. Wei Wuxian cackled quietly at his shidi looking like an idiot and went to join them.

Almost there, his eyes naturally fell to the front of the hall.

He stopped in his tracks.

Lan Wangji was looking directly at him where he was sitting at the Lan family table.

As a courtesy to the visiting heirs and their families, the main line of the Lan family dined inside the great eating hall instead of the privacy of their quarters while the guest lectures were taking place. Lan Wangji’s brother was sitting at Lan Qiren’s right and also watching Wei Wuxian with a certain amount of curious interest, while their uncle seemed entirely unimpressed and indifferent.

Lan Wangji’s expression was—especially from afar—as hard to figure out as ever.

Wei Wuxian sent him a beaming smile and a small wave with the hand that wasn’t holding his dining tray. He hoped he hadn’t been staring too long.

As he finally sat down next to Jiang Cheng who was currently stuffing his cheeks full of rice, he saw how Nie Huaisang waggled exaggeratedly with his eyebrows and he quickly kicked his shin underneath the table to make him stop. Nie Huaisang’s face at once contorted into a completely silent pained wail, since making noise while eating was forbidden, which was hilarious to watch and Wei Wuxian had to pull himself together to not laugh out loud.

He wondered what might be going on in Lan Wangji’s head. Had Lan Qiren told his nephews about Wei Wuxian’s extracurricular adventures? Probably not, since gossiping wasn’t allowed. He stole another glance at where the Lan family sat but immediately whipped his head back to his bowl and snatched up some cabbage to chew on.

Lan Wangji was still looking at him.

Well, if he really didn’t know what had happened, he was probably just curious.

Yes.

That was definitely all. Wei Wuxian decided that he really shouldn’t get in over his head, assigning too much meaning to Lan Wangji finally showing some small amount of interest in him.

Something prodded against his fingers and he felt Nie Huaisang cramming something into his hand. It turned out to be a creased note.

Your chances might not equal zero after all!

He had added a face that managed to look salacious and questing at once. Wei Wuxian grimaced at it. Definitely not his friend’s best work. Where had he even acquired the coal and paper to write this? He tried to see, but Nie Huaisang had already turned to his tea again while Jiang Cheng looked back and forth between the two of them suspiciously.

It likely wouldn’t take much longer before his shidi realized they were hiding something from him, and then Wei Wuxian would have to tell him the truth, since a sulky Jiang Cheng wasn’t something Wei Wuxian would let stand. It was his duty as the older one to ensure his sweet little sect sibling’s happiness after all! Even though Jiang Cheng would most defintely ungratefully threaten to break his legs if Wei Wuxian ever said that out loud.

But since they all had a full schedule today, not only would Jiang Cheng not get an opportunity to interrogate Wei Wuxian before tonight, the latter was also confident in his ability to delay having to confess at all.

Jiang Cheng would thank him for that one day!

He had long complained how Wei Wuxian must be some kind of masochist to like spending his time annoying the Lans' head of discipline so much. Wei Wuxian shook his head with a sigh. Sometimes, he almost thought Jiang Cheng interpreted him spending time with others as some kind of personal betrayal!

So, Wei Wuxian would do him a favor and not yet disclose what might be the actual reason behind his favorite new pastime.

_______

Wei Wuxian arrived at the bench he had been told to wait at shortly before weishi would start. He had consoled Jiang Cheng, who had been angry that Wei Wuxian was missing classes again, by promising him to explain everything later.

Well, almost everything.

As Wei Wuxian had decided, his current obsession with a certain forehead-ribbon-wearing disciple would stay a secret for longer if he had anything to say about it.

He wondered who Lan Qingzhao might send to fetch him. He actually didn’t know how the Lan disciples' education was organized and was curious to see if the instruction of their own people differed from the lectures open to the cultivation world.

After some time a young man came through the gate, looked around and—upon spotting Wei Wuxian—approached him with a big smile. He had a pleasant face and as Wei Wuxian stood to greet him, he noticed that the other wasn’t that much taller than him even though he appeared to be some years older. He bowed to him but the other waved him off amicably and introduced himself as Lan Chuanli.

“Master told me to escort you to class with me. I imagine you will join us today?” he asked with a happy cadence. Wei Wuxian liked him immediately. He had thought all Lans were serious like Lan Wangji. Who would have thought there would be someone so friendly and casual in their midst?

“Yeah, I'm Wei Wuxian from Yunmeng. Master Lan Qingzhao said she wants to test how I’ll be able to perform in her class,” he responded, returning the other's smile.

“Well, follow me, then!”

They went past the gate and Wei Wuxian curiously looked around, taking in the new surroundings.

The Cloud Recesses were truly a beautiful place.

“The others will be pretty surprised," Lan Chuanli mentioned, sounding amused. "It has been some time since someone new joined the talismanic art's course. And you are so young too, Wei-gongzi! You must be pretty good!” Lan Chuanli winked at him and Wei Wuxian felt that warmth in his chest once more that had first appeared after his talk with the old man yesterday.

“How many students attend the talisman course?” he asked curiously.

“We were six up until last month," Lan Chuanli ruminated. "Then A-Ming got married and now that his wife will give birth soon, he’s on leave from sect duties. He’ll have a year free that bastard! Well, they're expecting twins, so I guess it's good he gets to support his wife and make her life as comfortable as he can. She has to carry two little people after all, that is tough work!” He sounded almost wistful. “When my older sister was carrying my niece, she was complaining so much—I think she brought my brother-in-law to tears more than once!” he chuckled in remembrance.

Wei Wuxian was silently amused by his chattiness.

“So, we were only five for a few weeks and now six again with you! Well, if you’ll join us for longer that is,” he said the last part while he grinned at him, as if him joining the class permanently was a foregone conclusion.

“How do you Lans normally join this course?” Wei Wuxian wanted to know, since such a small number of students didn’t seem like the sect had simply assigned them the task.

Lan Chuanli laughed heartily and said, still smiling, “Master is pretty picky. But don’t you think now that all of us are prodigies! I certainly still have a lot to learn when it comes to the art.” He grinned at Wei Wuxian like they shared a joke.

“You probably have some real talent, since I heard xiansheng recommended you to her himself. And two of the others are also pretty good! But apart from that, master’s way of picking her students follows some unknown rules only she herself knows. To be honest, I think she mostly accepts people she finds amusing. And as long as you are dedicated to genuinely learn at your own pace, she will teach you!” He laughed again and Wei Wuxian thought he had at last found a Lan who liked to be happy as much as he did himself.

It also really sounded like Lan Qingzhao was a female senior disciple with quite different priorities than Madam Yu.

By now, they were approaching one of many near elegant buildings overlooking a cliff. The terrain in the private parts of the Cloud Recesses seemed to be more uneven than what Wei Wuxian knew from the public grounds. A lot of high paths and bridges could be seen leading across ravines filled with clear mountain-streams and lush greenery. Some of the houses visible in the distance had been built so high up on mountain peaks that they disappeared behind puffy clouds. From their current path Wei Wuxian could easily understand how the Cloud Recesses had gained their name.

“I’ve always thought the Lan sect specializes in music? How come you are studying talismanry instead?” he asked Lan Chuanli.

“Oh, when it comes to that the rules are actually much stricter for the main family line," he said, smiling. "Luckily, there has yet to be a Lan sect heir who didn't inherit a predisposition for musical cultivation and a musical ear! Most share that luck too, certainly!" He chuckled. "But since there are also Lans like me who have only just enough talent to learn an instrument satisfactorily, we can also specialize in some other discipline instead. The martial instructors for example are all masters who once chose to forgo the path of advanced musical cultivation. So, you can still succeed if you’ve been cursed with tone-deafness even if you’re born a Lan.”

Wei Wuxian laughed good-naturedly.

The two of them had entered the building and were walking down a spacious hallway. Behind a few doors Wei Wuxian could make out children’s voices and he thought that this was probably where the novice classes were being held. Lan Chuanli opened one of the last doors, revealing what appeared to be a classroom. There were two other young men and two young women already inside, kneeling in pairs behind long writing tables and raising their heads as the two entered.

Lan Qingzhao herself was there too, sitting at the front of the room on a raised platform, smaller, but similar to the one in the Lanshi. She smiled at them and he bowed to greet her again.

Lan Chuanli clapped him on the shoulder with another wink, then made his way over to one of the tables where no one was sitting yet. Wei Wuxian didn’t quite know if he was supposed to follow him or not, so he stayed where he was for now.

The talisman master swiftly stood. “This is Wei Wuxian from the Yunmeng Jiang sect," she adressed her students. "The Grandmaster has found the guest disciple lectures to be insufficient for him and since he has the talent, he will be joining us today.”

Wei Wuxian thought some of the others looked surprised but there were also some small smiles sent his way.

“Wei Wuxian, during my class students work in pairs to facilitate discussion. Chuanli will work together with you today since the others have all already started. Chuanli, please show him what you are working on.”

Lan Chuanli saluted obediently, then started wildly waving for Wei Wuxian to come sit next to him.

As he sat down, the young man handed him a booklet that had been opened on a page showing an ancient text.

While Lan Chuanli explained to him what they were supposed to be doing, the other students started calmly murmuring to each other as well. Wei Wuxian found the atmosphere immediately more pleasant than what the Lanshi felt like during classes.

“So... we are supposed to work out what the array described in this ancient account might have looked like and why it helped this guy regain his sanity?" he wondered, curiously scanning the pages in front of them after Lan Chuanli had finished explaining. "And at the end of the week, we present our solution to the others? Seems easy enough. This text is clearly talking about an array to counter some mind-altering curse. I’m just not sure what the author describes with this part here.” He squinted, pointing at the section he meant. “Long hidden insights, flashing again from the shadows of my lethargy... sounds pretty dramatic. Some kind of memory-erasing curse perhaps? Or one that aggrieves the mind?”

As Wei Wuxian raised his eyes he found Lan Chuanli looking at him with a baffled expression. Then he broke out into hearty laughter.

“Just solve the thing, why don’t you!” he chuckled, slapping Wei Wuxian on the back a few times, causing him to be rocked forward repeatedly.

The Lans' arm strength truly was nothing to scoff at!

“I think I’ve just stumbled upon some lucky streak, getting such a brilliant little disciple as my new study partner.”

Wei Wuxian grinned sheepishly. “Please feel free to interrupt my rambling, Lan-gongzi. I kind of don’t stop if you don’t force me.”

“I absolutely won’t!" Lan Chuanli decided without hesitation. "Let me tell you, my friend! This text has bothered me for ages at this point! The sooner we finish this and can proceed to a new assignment, the happier you’ll make me!”

As the two of them began to search for an array that fit the description in the text Wei Wuxian was happy to find that—while Lan Chuanli sometimes had to ask him to clarify how he came to some of his conclusions—he had undersold his ability somewhat. His understanding of the topic was more than solid and whenever Wei Wuxian got distracted by small details, Lan Chuanli amicably managed to pull his attention back to their main task which was quite helpful. They soon found an array that met both of their satisfaction and Lan Qingzhao handed them one of the other assignments she had prepared.

Like this the time passed quickly and before Wei Wuxian knew what hit him the sky outside had turned dark and the talisman master instructed them to tidy their desks and prepare to leave.

Abruptly hit with a realization, Wei Wuxian shot up in his chair. “Shit! I've forgotten to meet Lan Zhan in the library!”

Had Lan Wangji waited for him all this time and Wei Wuxian hadn’t even realized?! “I have to go find him this instant!”

The Lan disicples around him seemed quite startled to hear him suddenly curse.

“Little Wangji?” Lan Chuanli asked and Wei Wuxian couldn’t even be delighted about how he called someone the public had titled the Second Jade of Lan.

Instead he nodded and quickly said, “I'm sorry, I really gotta run!”

He rushed to the door and, only just remembering his manners, whirled around and bowed low to the baffled people in front of him.

“I'm really sorry about this! Thank you very, very much that I was allowed to be here today!”

With that he whirled around again and raced out of the building, ignoring the ‘no running in the Cloud Recesses rule’ entirely while behind him he heard Lan Chuanli break out into laughter.

What if Lan Wangji was still there? What if he thought Wei Wuxian didn’t care that he had spent all this time diligently waiting for him to appear and hadn’t even thought to send him a note?

What if this was what made Lan Wangji decide Wei Wuxian wasn’t worth his time after all?

What if he wouldn’t want to go with him to Caiyi tomorrow afternoon any longer?!

He ran as fast as he could, through the gate, past the Lanshi, completely ignoring an elder who had seen him from afar and shouted something. He even enhanced his speed with some spiritual power and as the library finally came into view, he was sweaty and panting, taking the stairs that lead to the entrance two at a time and throwing open the doors to their usual reading room, already shouting, “Lan Zhan! I’m so sorry, I—”

The room was empty.

If Lan Wangji had been here, he had probably left again long ago, their usual table lying cleared and the candles extinguished.

“Haaargh!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed and put his hands on his hips to catch his breath. “I should have known! Argh, so stupid!”

Why would Lan Wangji wait for him here when he just didn’t show up? He probably had a lot much more important things to do and was relieved to not have to babysit Wei Wuxian for once.

Who knew if Lan Wangji had even been at the library at all today? Perhaps Lan Qiren had informed his nephew that Wei Wuxian wasn’t coming after all and Wei Wuxian had made himself crazy for nothing.

Lan Wangji would be in the great eating hall during dinner though.

Usually, Wei Wuxian didn’t get any opportunities to talk with Lan Wangji there, since Lan Wangji had a habit of coming and leaving early and Wei Wuxian had a habit of coming and leaving late. But if he hurried there right now, he could probably manage to be the very first student to arrive and could wait for the other boy at the entrance. He should at least attempt to apologize! He knew he wouldn’t manage to relax today at all or get much sleep tonight if he didn’t hear from Lan Wangji himself that he would still come with him tomorrow.

Realistically, he knew Lan Wangji would likely stay true to his words. Since he had agreed to Wei Wuxian’s pleading he would probably see their initial plan through even if he was annoyed with him.

But Wei Wuxian also knew that Lan Wangji at most tolerated him right now. Whatever Nie Huaisang had implied earlier at lunch, Wei Wuxian knew that since he had spent much time teasing and intentionally aggravating the other Lan Wangji didn't have many reasons to find him anything but exasperating.

Wei Wuxian had probably been too careless trying to make Lan Wangji react to him, had wanted him to lose control and show obvious emotions, even if they were negative. Because that was difficult enough to achieve! Lan Wangji really had impeccable self restrain, and it had been fun to think up new, even more outrageous schemes to counter Lan Wangji’s getting used to his pranks. What his dream had depicted, him pranking Lan Wangji by showing him pornography, truly was well within the realm of possibilities.

But even though Wei Wuxian would have, before yesterday, still argued that he truly wanted Lan Wangji’s friendship and that it was the other's fault that their relationship wasn’t improving since he kept rejecting Wei Wuxian’s advances, he now realized that he had been fooling himself.

Lan Wangji’s short and understated reactions of annoyance had been a delight to him—he had wanted to see what would make the Second Jade of Lan snap out of his iron-clad control, wanted to be the cause of it. And since Lan Wangji’s anger had been the most accessible reaction, he hadn't even tried eliciting positive responses. He had been able to ride the short bursts of euphoria and pride that came with making Lan Wangji’s snappishness appear and hadn’t even dared to dream of getting Lan Wangji to react positively to him or admitted to himself he might want such a thing at all.

Besides, anger was a devastatingly good look on Lan Wangji.

Wei Wuxian turned on his heel and hurried into the direction of the great eating hall.

What he had counted as a success when it came to Lan Wangji’s reactions didn't feel like enough anymore. His perspective on their dynamic had changed, the dream had forced him to open his eyes to the fact that he didn’t want to—no couldn’t risk that Lan Wangji might actually start to dislike him.

Wei Wuxian didn’t want Lan Wangji to just endure his presence.

He wanted him to be able to let down his guard around him, to trust him. He wanted to hear his thoughts, wanted to ask him so many questions and have him be willing to answer honestly.

He wanted Lan Wangji to take him seriously, and have him realize that Wei Wuxian took him seriously in return.

He wanted him to care about Wei Wuxian, at least a little bit.

He thought Lan Wangji’s indifference might be even worse than his dislike.

As he reached the eating hall, it seemed he really was the first to arrive. Wei Wuxian cheered silently, quickly positioning himself at the entrance to wait.

“I can’t believe I actually managed to outmatch Lan Zhan’s punctuality,” he mused, trying to straighten his hair. It had become slightly tilted as he ran and since Lan Wangji already thought him sloppy and disorderly it wouldn’t do to add to that impression. Wei Wuxian chuckled, thinking how he hadn’t thought he would ever fret over his appearance for the sake of someone else. But it turned out that effortless self-confidence was actually the privilege of the unambitious. Now that he wanted Lan Wangji to like him, he couldn’t help but start worrying over what he looked like through the other boy’s eyes.

“I’ve really gone crazy. As if Lan Zhan would even notice something like that…” he mumbled to himself.

“As if my brother would notice something like what?” an amused voice suddenly asked behind Wei Wuxian’s back.

Wei Wuxian jerked around to see Lan Xichen’s smiling face directly behind him. The Lan sect heir had obviously come from somewhere inside the hall.

And Lan Wangji himself was standing behind his older brother, gazing at Wei Wuxian with unreadable eyes.

“Ahh! Zewu-jun, you almost gave me a heart attack!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed, hurriedly bowing to him. “Where did you two appear from so suddenly? I was waiting for Lan Zhan at the entrance, how come you came from the other direction?”

Lan Xichen chuckled gracefully and glanced back at Lan Wangji, who somehow managed to frown at his older brother without moving his face at all.

“We did not mean to frighten you, Wei-gongzi. Wangji and I always enter through another entrance at the front of the hall. Since it is reserved for us members of the main family it is no wonder you hadn’t yet noticed its existence,” he explained almost effusively. Something about this situation seemed to amuse him but since Wei Wuxian had no clue what that might be he brushed the thought aside.

“Since you were waiting for Wangji you should use this chance to talk before the other students arrive and we’ll have to take a seat,” Lan Xichen advised helpfully, making no move to give them privacy himself.

Well, this opportunity suited Wei Wuxian’s purposes just fine.

“Oh yeah!" he agreed, turning to look at Lan Wangji. "Ah, Lan Zhan. I was attending your sect’s talisman master’s class on old—ah, I mean Lan-xiansheng’s orders today. Did he tell you? I didn't make you wait for me in the library in vain, did I?” he probed, hoping to be allowed to apologize if that had been the case.

But Lan Wangji just shook his head.

“Shufu notified me of Wei Ying’s changed obligations,” he stated and Wei Wuxian let out a breath in relief.

“That’s great! I was really worried I stood you up and you’d refuse to come with me down to Caiyi tomorrow!”

Lan Wangji looked slightly hesitant.

“I would not,” he said and next to him Wei Wuxian noticed Lan Xichen perking up and looking between the two of them delightedly.

“You have made plans to go to town tomorrow? What are you going for?” he inquired, great interest sparkling in his eyes. Wei Wuxian immediately recognized the airs of a meddling older sibling.

“Your uncle offered to do me a favor and I wanted to get him something as a token of gratitude. I asked Lan Zhan to advise me on what to buy,” he told him.

“That is very nice of you, Wei-gongzi,” Lan Xichen replied, although this time he looked slightly astonished, probably wondering what kind of favor his uncle would offer a student whose existence seemed to be a thorn in his side.

“Reciprocate favors given out of benevolence,” Wei Wuxian quoted the Lan precepts, delighted as he saw how Lan Wangji's eyebrow twitched slightly, as if he felt tempted to ask Wei Wuxian who he thought he was kidding.

“Wangji, if you are going in the afternoon, you two are likely to miss dinner. Why don’t you show Wei-gongzi our favorite place to eat? If you two eat out you could take your time,” Lan Xichen proposed.

Wei Wuxian was impressed how innocent he could make his question seem while obviously attempting to meddle in his younger brother’s life.

“Xiongzhang,” Lan Wangji reproved, glaring at his older brother, but Wei Wuxian was distracted by what Zewu-Jun hat said.

“Hah? Lan Zhan, you have a favorite place to eat? You definitely have to let me treat you tomorrow! You never talk about yourself—I'm dying to know what such a place would look like!” he exclaimed, sending Lan Wangji a beseeching look, even though that tactic had already proven futile in the past.

This time however, Lan Wangji seemed to wrestle with himself for a bit, before just sighing quietly and nodding once. The joined forces of Wei Wuxian’s hopeful eyes and Lan Xichen’s positive advocacy seemed to be enough to back even the Second Jade of Lan into a corner.

“Alright!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed not bothering to hide his exaltation. “You won’t regret this, Lan Zhan!” he promised.

In the distance the first few guest disciples could be seen slowly approaching in that moment.

“I promise I'll behave for you tomorrow!” he added cheerfully.

Only after the words had left his mouth did he notice how they sounded. He flushed.

“I sincerely hope so, Wei-gongzi,” Lan Xichen said, smiling at him and Wei Wuxian suddenly found himself the lone recipient of the Lan heir’s mirth.

Incidentally, Wei Wuxian noticed that Lan Wangji’s ears looked a little red. Was he imagining things?

“Ah, Wangji, let’s take our seats, shufu will likely arrive soon,” Lan Xichen went on, politely nodding to Wei Wuxian. The latter quickly saluted at his leaving back.

Lan Wangji hesitated a little, still looking at him. Wei Wuxian took the chance to gather his courage and say, “I’m really looking forward to tomorrow, Lan Zhan!” And, ignoring his flushing face, he gave Lan Wangji a beaming smile.

Lan Wangji inclined his head and nodded once, then almost urgently turned around to follow his older brother to the Lan family table.

His ears had definitely been red.

Wei Wuxian’s heart was abruptly pounding in his chest.

_______

Dinner seemed to fly by and before Wei Wuxian knew it the Lans had already retired to do whatever it was Lans did before bed. Meditating or playing the qin or something equally dignified probably.

Wei Wuxian’s own evening was taking a much less dignified course. Jiang Cheng had sent him scalding glares all throughout dinner. It probably hadn’t helped how Wei Wuxian had repeatedly ended up dazedly staring in the direction the Lan family occupied. His shidi had to elbow him in the side to keep the rice from falling out of his mouth one too many times. But Wei Wuxian really couldn’t help himself!

Lan Wangji would go eat something with him.

They would spend the afternoon shopping together and in the evening the two of them would eat something together at Lan Wangji’s favorite place.

Officially.

Mutually agreed upon.

Voluntarily on both sides.

Wei Wuxian hadn’t needed to trick Lan Wangji into anything.

He had simply agreed!

This almost sounded like—it really sounded kind of a whole lot like they were going on a—

“Wei Wuxian!” Jiang Cheng hissed as quietly as he could, again shoving his elbow into Wei Wuxian’s flank, jostling him out of his thoughts.

Nie Huaisang sent him curious looks as well and Wei Wuxian knew he wouldn’t be able to escape his friends’ questions tonight.

As predicted, Jiang Cheng grabbed him by the arm as soon as they had left the hall to pull him into the direction of the dormitories, completely ignoring Wei Wuxian’s half-hearted whining that he was being too rough with his delicate self.

“You have a lot of explaining to do, Wei Wuxian!” he fumed when they had finally reached their room and he had shoved his squawking shixiong through the door.

Nie Huaisang had silently ingratiated himself into the situation as well, sitting down on Wei Wuxian’s bed.

“Aiyo, why are you so violent, Jiang Cheng?” Wei Wuxian cried, rubbing the arm his shidi had pulled even though it didn’t even hurt anymore and plopped himself down on the floor.

“You should really mellow out a bit, girls won’t like it!”

“What nonsense are you spouting?" Jiang Cheng complained. "What girls? I want to know what is going on with you!” He crossed his arms over his chest.

Nie Huaisang started leisurely fanning himself.

“First, you pull that stunt in class and the next morning the old man abducts you somewhere! You disappear for the whole day only to return looking like something had melted your brains out!”

He seemed mostly angry, but Wei Wuxian could recognize what lingered beneath his shidi’s scowling face. He was concerned and stressed because something was going on behind his back and he couldn’t make sense of it.

“I’m fine, Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian quickly assured him. “Old man Lan just had enough of my shenanigans in the guest lectures—he had me attend a talisman class with one of the Lan masters today.”

Nie Huaisang looked thoughtful at that but Wei Wuxian could see Jiang Cheng wasn’t yet appeased and so he added, “He was probably glad he finally found a way to get me out of his hair while simultaneously preventing me from causing trouble behind his back!”

Jiang Cheng stared at him with furrowed eyebrows a while longer. Then he huffed and plopped down on his own bed.

“And how do you think this will work? Father sent you to Gusu to graduate alongside me! How are you supposed to do that when you aren’t even attending classes?” Wei Wuxian was a bit baffled why he seemed to be so annoyed. He himself didn't really think of it as a big deal.

“I’ll still take the exams with you guys. And, besides, I don’t even know yet if I’ll be allowed to continue studying under that master. Maybe I’ll have to continue attending the guest lectures again tomorrow!” he explained, not saying how he really hoped that wouldn’t be the case.

Jiang Cheng seemed to have heard what he hadn't said anyway.

“You’ll have to? Wei Wuxian, what, don’t tell me that other class was so much better? Don’t you know that father had to appeal to the Lan sect to let you attend the lectures at all? Why must you insist on standing out? Do you think it looks good for the Jiang sect that you need special treatment? You are causing extra trouble for the Lan sect!”

Wei Wuxian didn’t immediately retort. If he hadn't had that talk with Lan Qiren yesterday these words would have probably stung a little bit more. But as it was, he felt the need to correct Jiang Cheng.

“Why are you so angry, Jiang Cheng? I'm grateful that Jiang-shushu put in the effort for me. But Lan Qiren told me that I, like my parents before me, would have gotten an invitation anyway! So really, whatever trouble I cause, the Lan sect will have only itself to blame!”

He hadn’t noticed before, but he didn't feel like keeping quiet about his parents’ or his own achievement when it came to this. For the first time ever, he had concrete evidence that he took after his mother and father. That he was just like them regarding something he could take pride in.

It was like Lan Qiren had handed him an inherited treasure, something that made his chest glow and his gait straighter.

Seeing how Jiang Cheng’s glower became even darker Wei Wuxian felt grateful when Nie Huaisang interrupted their tirade.

“Does this mean you won’t help me study for the exams anymore? Wei-xiong, would you really abandon a friend in desperate need?”

Wei Wuxian turned away from his shidi to grin at his friend instead.

“Nie-xiong, really! Haven't you attended these lectures once before already? Of course, if you want I'll still help you study, but if I actually won’t be in the lectures with you guys anymore, who can say for sure I won’t need you to start tutoring me instead?”

Jiang Cheng huffed.

“As if we’d be good enough to keep up with your great genius,” he grumbled. While he still sounded kind of bitter, Wei Wuxian took it as the offer to talk about something else that it was.

“Well, let’s see how badly I’ll fail genealogy! While I’m with Lan Zhan in town tomorrow, you guys have all the time in the world to spent cramming!”

Nie Huaisang abruptly gained the expression of a predator ready to pounce. “Wei-xiong! How could you not disclose that Lan-er-gongzi will accompany you tomorrow! I thought I was your friend, yet you betray me like this?”

Wei Wuxian sent him a meaningful glare, whishing he would tone it down a bit in front of Jiang Cheng. He tried to exude a casual air.

“Yeah, Lan Zhan will come with. I need to buy something for the old man as a thank-you gift. I really would be clueless what to get without some help.”

Jiang Cheng harrumphed. “A thank-you gift, seriously? Have you suddenly regained your long lost manners? And how’d you get him to agree? He's already so annoyed to have to look at your face daily.”

“Maybe Lan-er-gongzi doesn’t dislike Wei-xiong as much as we assumed,” Nie Huaisang simpered, wiggling with both eyebrows. Wei Wuxian felt really tempted to tackle him and sew his mouth shut.

“He probably wants to make sure you won’t buy something outrageous. Wait, how will you pay? Do you even have any money left this month?” Jiang Cheng asked drily, raising an eyebrow at him.

Wei Wuxian shrugged. While he had truly spent almost all his monthly allowance on snacks and alcohol already there was still enough left to fund his and Lan Wangji’s plans tomorrow. He would be truly broke after that, but whatever. It was for a good cause after all.

Jiang Cheng huffed when he didn't answer and let himself fall backwards onto his bed, taking out a book from the shelf standing next to it.

“Just don’t come crying to me again. I really won’t let you borrow any more from me,” he grumbled, flipping the book open where he had marked a page with a bookmark.

Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes.

Jiang Cheng had said often enough that he would never do something ever again only to still end up giving in in the end.

Seeing how the topic had been closed for now, Nie Huaisang dug around in his sleeve. “On another note—Wei-xiong, I found a truly divine zinnia flower today after lunch and plucked it. Why don’t we paint a bit?” He carefully produced a truly stellar specimen from his sleeve, proudly showing it to him.

“Sure, why not!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed happily, standing to go gather inks and paper for them. As he was about to sit down again he saw that Nie Huaisang had put down a note on the table next to the flower.

Seriously, did he have these notes already prepared in his robes?

Curiously, Wei Wuxian snatched it up from the tabletop.

Wei-xiong, you player! Have you already scored?

Is it a date? How dare you omit all the nasty details of your private life from what you tell your dearest friend and only confidante???

Wei Wuxian sent Nie Huaisang an incredulous look. But his friend had his chin resting on one hand, innocently grinding his ink without sparing him a glance.

Wei Wuxian grabbed a coal stick from his utensils and scribbled his answer on the back of Huaisang’s note.

There's nothing to omit. Lan Zhan’s simply doing me a favor.

You shouldn’t read too much into this!

He added an angry face for good measure. Seriously, his own mind was already troubling him enough, replaying past interactions with Lan Wangji in its downtime and getting ahead of itself. He didn’t need Nie Huaisang urging him to see things that weren’t there on top of that!

Nie Huaisang pouted slightly after reading his reply and swiftly scribbled something else into the corner Wei Wuxian had left free.

Where did all your courage disappear to?

What do you have to lose?

Just start courting him properly already and get yourself some ass! What are you suddenly being such a wimp for?

Wei Wuxian’s eyes went wide in scandalized shock.

“Huaisang!” he hissed, embarrassed by his friend’s crudeness. No one should talk about Lan Wangji like that!

Nie Huaisang just smirked and shrugged once, starting to draw the sweeping petals of the zinnia flower onto his paper.

“You know I’m right,” he whispered, dipping his brush into the ink.

That made Wei Wuxian pause.

Did he?

Was he being a coward right now?

Wei Wuxian typically didn’t feel scared of things many others feared (dogs excluded). He wasn’t often in a situation where he had to overcome his fears to achieve something.

But really... what was stopping him from trying to at least pursue Lan Wangji? He already had the overambitious goal to establish a real friendship with him, but who was to say he wouldn’t ruin his chance for more should he ever manage that?

After all, if Lan Wangji accepted Wei Wuxian as a friend, wouldn’t it likely be difficult to turn that into something else?

If it was possible for Lan Wangji to see Wei Wuxian in the light that Wei Wuxian had started to see him in, wouldn’t he need to initiate that kind of development as soon as possible to avoid future misunderstandings?

Pondering over this matter, he started his own picture, ignoring Nie Huaisang’s satisfied smirk.

Even later when Nie Huaisang had already left und even as him and Jiang Cheng had gone to bed and his shidi was asleep, the thought kept him awake.

He felt the thrill of actually considering this down to his toes. Actually being bold enough to consider whether he dared to believe himself enough for the second young master of a great sect might be the most outrageous thing he had done to date!

But this wasn’t about worth.

Wei Wuxian knew very well that in the eyes of the cultivation world he didn’t live up to the ranking that had been created by the young women of their generation. Just being handsome and talented enough to reach fourth place in their eyes wasn’t enough for the people who actually held power.

Even though Lan Wangji was just the second son, as soon as his big brother inherited the sect leader position, which would only be a matter of time considering how the current leader of the Lan sect had entered perpetual seclusion over ten years ago, he would become the first heir.

And although the Lans weren’t known for tactically arranging marriages to increase their power, they would still keep a careful eye on who would get to marry one of their Jades.

Wei Wuxian was talented with a sword and not the worst match imaginable when it came to the political influence he would likely hold someday.

(A bit flustered he thought about the offers minor sect leaders had sent to Lotus Pier over the years after Wei Wuxian had started making a name for himself. He had Jiang-shushu to thank for taking a rare stance against his wife and putting his foot down on the matter. Madam Yu had seemed eager to gain some kind of leverage over Wei Wuxian by marrying him to a daughter of a family that had affiliations to her own natal sect.)

Wei Wuxian was just a servant’s son but as the head disciple he could offer his future wife an honorable position in one of the five great sects.

That was, if he married a woman.

He turned around in bed, feeling something similar to dread rising up in his stomach as he imagined trying to explain to Madam Yu how he might as well bring a boy home someday.

A daughter would, as tradition demanded, marry into her husband’s sect. While Wei Wuxian knew he would never be able to marry Lan Wangji in any reality, in the strictly hypothetical scenario where this came to pass, he would have to join the Lans since Lan Wangji outranked him significantly.

He would lose his head disciple position and therefore all of the incentives he could offer his potential spouse and their family and he wouldn’t even be able to produce children for his new home.

At most it would mean an alliance with the Jiangs but neither an alliance of blood nor one the other sects would take seriously.

Wei Wuxian knew very well that it was—without selling himself short—completely outlandish for him to even consider his chances with Lan Wangji.

But this wasn’t about worth.

Wei Wuxian wouldn’t seriously attempt to win the Second Jade of Lan’s hand anyway. Even his shamelessness knew its limits.

But where was the harm in having a bit of fun?

When it came down to it, Wei Wuxian didn’t personally care about what the sect leaders or the public would think. The only thing that really interested him was what Lan Wangji thought.

If Lan Wangji rejected him because he didn’t want Wei Wuxian to taint his own or his sect’s reputation or if he disliked the thought of being pursued by a man in general or him specifically, Wei Wuxian would leave him be immediately.

But Nie Huaisang was right. What did he have to lose?

Just because there was a not unsubstantial chance that he would be rejected, wasn’t there still a tiny chance that Lan Wangji would come around?

And if he didn’t try, wouldn’t Wei Wuxian regret it forever?

He felt himself grinning and he buried his face in his pillow as he felt his resolve harden.

Lan Wangji could always say no.

And he was such a private person, whatever happened, no one would have to know and be able to start spreading nasty rumors about them.

The few good feelings Lan Qiren had shown Wei Wuxian in the past days would immediately dissolve into thin air again if the old man ever caught wind of it, but in the end that wouldn’t matter.

The only opinion that truly mattered was Lan Wangji’s.