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It seemed no matter what she did, someone was always going to be in her way, trying to prove her wrong, explain something, or gods forbid try to help. Yennefer of Vengerberg didn’t need help. She despised it. She hated having to concede and even ask for help. She was adamant, not an idiot. Whether the help was for her “own good” though, whoever posed that could choke on their tongue.
She needed no one. Wanted for nothing she couldn’t get herself. She was the greatest mage in the Continent and didn’t need a coven to prove that. She was the chaos and calm of the hurricane. She was who people asked for help, why would she need to ask anyone else for anything.
She hated how Tissaia first tried. Hated how much better her life became when her teacher bought and saved her. Hated how she never told her how good she was in class, but then praised her through disconcerting methods. She hated it when Istredd became her friend and lover only to taint that with prideful boasting and backstabbing.
Then, the surprise she had when a bard and a witcher fell into her party mid-orgasm and ruined her fun preemptively. Only to continue to trample over her plans and insert themselves into her life. She didn’t ask, let alone want, any of this. Sure the sex was great now and again, but it definitely didn’t make up for the mess she found out about afterward.
A djinn wish. How did she miss that? She didn’t. Geralt wasn’t supposed to make a wish and rope her into his shit. But he did and when he told her, she wanted to kill him.
How dare he? What the fuck was he thinking? Hadn’t the twice-damned bastard learned anything from his own mistakes? Did he have to constantly rub his nose in his own shit he shat?
Yennefer knew getting mad at Geralt wouldn’t exactly fix the problem. But it felt good. Pile all of the dumb shit and find a scapegoat to push it onto. Blame someone, anyone else and move on or try to fix it. If it isn’t your fault you can fix it and remain detached. If you're involved, things get messy and complicated. While Yennefer could handle complicated—she hated complicated.
Admittedly, Yennefer hated a lot of things.
And with that, she realized how many little things she liked. Very few things actually. Wine, sex, notoriety… power.
What do you want?
What was everything?
Yennefer of Vengerberg didn’t need help. She hated it.
But sometimes, with the hate came the hope that someone would see through her own bullshit. Until that day came, she’d have to persevere on her own. And that thought left her empty.