Chapter Text
Trepidation, now that was a word which Jimin would use to express how he currently felt on a day-to-day basis as he transgressed through life. His transgressions had become numerous and more and more daring with each passing day. If one were to ask him how he had ended up where he was now, standing precariously at the edge of the Banpo bridge which crossed over the Han River he'd have to take you back to the day his parents met their unfavourable end on a business trip in Busan.
The day Jimin's parents died was the day that his innocence died as well. As a young, impressionable teenager Jimin was on many accounts your stereotypical, nerdy, overachieving student. He brought home good grades, did multiple co-curriculars, volunteered at an animal shelter and strove to achieve something with his life.
The twelfth of May was the day that his world was thrown into complete and utter turmoil. The police arriving at his school accompanied by his older brother had been the first sign that something was seriously amiss. The next hint of things to come were the tears which clouded Namjoon's eyes as he stared blankly at the ugly grey linoleum floors of Jimin's high school hallway. And the final confirmation were the gut wrenching words which came from the officer’s mouth.
Judging by Namjoon's steely, impassive gaze they were words he had already started to process, but for Jimin they were a huge blow. It was as if the walls of the already claustrophobic hallway started to cave in, crushing him. His breathing seemed to still as his mind tried to fathom what he had just heard. He had to remind himself to take a breath to calm the burning which had developed in his starved lungs. He felt Namjoon's large hand on his shoulder then, a sign of comfort, but it felt foreign for some reason. As if the gesture was alien to Jimin instead of something he had known his whole life.
That was what life would become now, alien. Something completely different and unknown for the two Park brothers. If the news of their parents passing wasn't enough, the realisation of how isolated and alone the two now would be the next mental hurdle which they'd need to overcome.
Their mother was an only child, and both her parents were elderly and in homes, whilst their fathers only brother lived in New York and would have no interest in taking in two teenage boys. Their other grandparents had passed a few years before, and with no other extended or immediate family the role of guardianship was up for debate. Namjoon was still too young to legally take guardianship of Jimin, and the process of becoming emancipated would be a difficult and drawn-out feat to achieve.
And to top everything off, both boys’ inheritance was frozen until they reached the age of 21, which for Jimin was still years off. So, in the meantime the boys were orphaned, alone and broke. The state would provide the necessities as both boys were put into appropriate services; both being offered places in the same boys home in a rundown part of Busan. Jimin and Namjoon had to transfer schools to a closer, less than cosier high school which wasn't appealing to either of them. They tried to make it work, they tried to survive and make do, but was treading water and barely staying afloat really surviving?
Namjoon didn't think so, he wanted better for his dongsaeng, so he started to put out feelers, started to try and piece together an alternate path for the two. Namjoon was not oblivious to the treatment his little brother received in the home, nor was he oblivious to the fact that Jimin was utterly depressed, but he was oblivious to just how severe things were for Jimin.
Namjoon never saw the bruises or tear stained cheeks, he never saw the cuts or self-inflicted injuries. And he most definitely never saw the unwanted and grotesque hickey's which started to become a constant decoration on Jimin's pale skin. Namjoon's primary focus was on getting the two of them out of there, he had heard rumours of how some boys were treated in the home, but never did he think those very rumours were becoming true for his own flesh and blood.
Namjoon had a plan to get the two out of there, perhaps it was batshit crazy and he knew that there was every chance that he may regret his decisions in the future but for now this was their best bet. His only mistake was not bringing Jimin into it all sooner, he should’ve told his brother about his plans well before he left the home, well before he ran away. Because the moment Jimin learnt that his brother had left the home was the moment he felt truly abandoned in this world. Namjoon hadn’t even left as much as a note, he thought that Jimin would assume he’d have a plan and that he’d be back for him. But Jimin’s immediate assumption was that just like everyone and everything else in his life he had lost his brother as well.
Namjoon was also unaware that him leaving would have such a huge impact on Jimin. No one was to know that as soon as Namjoon left the abuse and neglect Jimin had been facing up until that point would only worsen.
So, by the time Namjoon returned to the home just over two months later to get his brother and bring him back to Seoul with him he was faced with a harsh, stark reality. He snuck into the home late one night and expertly made his way through the all too familiar halls to Jimin’s room.
When he opened the door, he heard Jimin sniffle and as soon as he got to the side of his brothers’ bed he watched as Jimin stiffened. His eyes were screwed shut but that did nothing to hide the all too evident black eye and discoloured yellowy green bruises which littered the younger males face.
“Jimin?” Namjoon asked softly he was startled by what he saw, but he didn’t want to startle his brother by overreacting in that moment.
“P-please not tonight.” Jimin pleaded eyes still screwed shut as he seemingly curled in on himself.
“Jimin-ah, it’s me, it’s Namjoon.” He said trying to coax his brother out of his clearly terrified state.
“N-Namjoon left, he isn’t here, d-don’t lie to me please.” Jimin’s soft voice implored causing Namjoon’s heart to break.
“Jiminie, open your eyes.” He said as he knelt down beside his brother’s bed, he reached out and gently carded his fingers through his brother’s hair only to have the younger flinch away from him out of instinct.
“N-no, please don’t touch me, I-I’ve been good.” Jimin’s voice wavered as he said it.
“Minnie, please open your eyes.” Namjoon said more seriously this time, the nickname seemed to flick something in the youngers mind as he slowly opened his eyes. They hesitantly scanned over Namjoon’s face taking in every detail as his lower lip began to quiver.
“H-Hyung?” Jimin asked shakily as he slowly started to sit up wincing slightly as he did.
“It’s me Minnie, I’m here.” Namjoon said trying to keep his own emotions in check because he knew breaking down now would be futile.
“Y-you’re not a dream?” Jimin asked as he reached a shaky hand out and placed it on his brother’s cheek, the physical contact seemed to cement in the youngers mind that this was very much real. Namjoon watched as Jimin’s tense shoulders relaxed ever so slightly as silent tears started to roll down his bruised cheeks.
“I’m here Minnie, right here, I’m so sorry for leaving, I thought you’d figure out that I’d come back for you, I’d never leave you behind Min.” Namjoon said trying to comfort his little brother as much as possible but his words just seemed to make Jimin’s tears fall harder.
“B-but you did, you left me hyung.” Jimin sobbed causing Namjoon’s already broken heart to shatter.
“I’m back though Min and I’m getting you out of here, I just needed to get things in place before I could come back for you.” Namjoon said gently as he pulled Jimin to his chest, through the thin fabric of the younger’s pyjamas Namjoon could feel his very prominent bones which protruded from his skin jarringly. “Have you been eating Min?” Namjoon asked seriously then, there was no denying that Jimin had lost a startling amount of weight, he had always been tiny, but he was now skeletal.
“O-only when I’m good.” Jimin said in a voice above a whisper, his answer confused Namjoon completely but now was not the time for such serious conversations, they needed to get out before they were found.
“Min, I need you to get up and get changed for me okay? I have a friend waiting for us outside.” Namjoon said seriously and watched as Jimin nodded hesitantly, he slowly swung his legs out of the bed. The movement seemed to hurt and take a lot of effort from the younger, just another observation which made the knot in Namjoon’s stomach tighten.
Namjoon stood then and helped Jimin up, the extent of Jimin’s state really sinking in then as the scarily skinny boy swayed for a moment before grabbing an old pair of black skinny jeans from the end of his bed. He asked Namjoon to turn around, the older male did so hesitantly but allowed Jimin to get changed in private.
“I-I’m done.” Jimin said finally and Namjoon turned to see him wearing a jumper which was two sizes too big and the skinny jeans which were far too baggy. The clothes made Jimin look tinier than he was.
“Okay Min, let’s go, is there anything you want to take with? We can buy you other clothes and toiletries.” Namjoon asked and watched as Jimin’s eyes shifted to his nightstand, Jimin slowly bent down then and pulled the drawer open. Inside was a very well-read copy of To Kill a Mockingbird and a faded photo of their parents and them on a vacation in Jeju. Namjoon got lost for a moment as he stared at the picture, those were happier times.
“I-I’m ready.” Jimin said as he clutched the book and picture to his chest, Namjoon gave him a small smile before leading him from the room quietly.
They made their way back through the halls towards the small service door at the back of the kitchen which Namjoon had discovered a long time ago when doing chores in the home. Namjoon could just make out how much Jimin was shaking as he walked a few steps ahead of his brother. Namjoon indicated for Jimin to head out of the door, and with one final glance over his shoulder Jimin stepped out into the icy Busan night.
Namjoon gently placed his hand on the youngers shoulders as he led him down a path towards the road. A black coupe sat a few driveways down and as soon Namjoon and Jimin appeared the engine roared to life and slowly crept closer to the duo. Namjoon felt Jimin tense up beneath his touch, he could only begin to imagine what was going through the youngster’s head in that moment.
“Don’t worry Min, he’s my friend, he’s here to help.” Namjoon explained as they reached the car, Namjoon opened the back door for Jimin who hesitantly got in. The car smelt like leather, cigarettes, and men’s aftershave; it didn’t seem intimidating but to Jimin it was a very imposing thing to be in the backseat of the unknown vehicle. Namjoon got into the passenger seat and glanced back at the petrified looking Jimin.
“Min, this is my friend Hobi, he’s here to help us.” Namjoon explained gently and watched as Jimin relaxed ever so slightly but it was evident that his guard was still up.
“Hey man, don’t worry, we will get you somewhere real nice real soon.” Hobi said and flashed Jimin a big smile in the rear-view mirror as he pulled away from the home.
No more words were spoken as Jimin watched the familiar scenery flash by, his head was a jumble of thoughts. He truly believed that Namjoon had left him, and yet here he was whisking Jimin away from his own personal hell. With time Jimin felt his eyelids grow heavier as the gentle drive lulled him into a disturbed but much needed sleep.
Meanwhile both Hobi and Namjoon kept shooting concerned glances towards the youngster. As soon as a little snore escaped Jimin’s lips Hobi let out a sigh which he had been keeping in for a while.
“Well shit Joon, he isn’t looking too good.” Hobi commented eventually.
“I have no idea what they fucking did to him but I’m trying very hard not to make you go back there so I can make anyone who dared touch him pay.” Namjoon seethed, this was out of character for him but Hobi fully understood where he was coming from. If his own brother came home looking like that there’d undoubtedly be a blood bath.
“Let’s hear what he has to say about it before we decide who has to die.” The way Hobi said it so casually made a small shiver run down Namjoon’s spine, more because he knew that Hobi wasn’t joking, he meant every word.
“Fuck Hobi, my biggest concern tonight was him ripping into me and hating me for leaving. Instead, he’s this broken, withdrawn husk, I would’ve preferred if he tried to punch my lights out, but not this.” Namjoon’s voice wavered slightly as he said it.
“Did you notice those hickeys on his neck?” Hobi asked softly, he knew all too well what they inevitably indicated towards and it made him sick to his stomach.
“Yeah, I noticed.” Namjoon said through gritted teeth, his shock and sadness now giving way to pure anger.
“Fuck man, I thought the stories about places like that were just fucking rumours, apparently not.” Hobi sighed as he merged onto the motorway smoothly.
“I wonder when it started? When I left? Or has this always been there and I just never fucking noticed?” Namjoon said as he already started to beat himself up for his brother’s state.
“Hey Joon, just remember he’s safe now, we have him, and we will protect him no matter what, okay?” Hobi said gently and watched as Namjoon gave him a small indiscernible nod.
“He better be Hobi because I can’t bear the thought of anything happening to him again. I just wish I had a time machine and could go back and stop anything happening to him in the first place.” He sighed as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair.
“Can’t change the past man, but we can sure as hell try and improve his future.” Hobi said trying to remain even slightly positive.
“Let’s just hope he’ll be able to move on from his past.” Namjoon said softly, he knew better than anyone just how much one’s past can fuck a man up and he’d been through far less than his brother seemingly had. But only time would be able to tell just how Jimin would fare now that he was free.