Work Text:
A child cries somewhere to Mina’s left, but she tries not to take too much notice of it. There’s always a child crying somewhere, and it’s not her job to soothe them. Besides, most of the kids here aren’t crying because they’re hurt. They’re crying because they’re overwhelmed, tired, impatient or just spoiled. Because their parents drag them to a new display before they’re done looking at that weird fish going glob-glob with its little lips. Or because they got ice cream and now have too much sugar in their systems and they got stubborn and ate too much and now have a tummy ache. Or because they want to see the big whale shark and their parents insist on seeing the entire aquarium but why can’t the kid just be allowed to spend five hours staring at the whale shark if that’s what it wants?
Mina shuts out the sound of the child. She’s worked here long enough to know that it’s the only way she can do her job.
“And now, who knows what whale sharks eat?” Mina asks the audience, standing at the bottom of an auditorium-like part of the aquarium, a huge display behind her, the thick glass revealing a little piece of the ocean.
“Fish?” A kid says. Maybe ten.
“People?” Another kid says. A little boy, five at most.
“Squids!” A third exclaims confidently.
Mina shakes her head. “Nope. You see whale sharks aren’t quite like the other sharks you think of. They don’t eat with their teeth and jaws. They do something called filter feeding. It opens really mouth really wide,” Mina does a movement with her arms, baby shark in mega version, “and when they swim through the water, sucks through their mouth, closes its mouth,” Mina closes her arms and claps her hands in the process, making some of the little kids jump on the front rows, “and right before opening its gills, the slits right there, it sieves out the plankton and swallows it. Does anyone know another animal who filter feeds?”
Mina looks over the crowd. The blue lights reflect on the guests’ skin, but not all are looking at her. Some are busy looking at their kids or into their phones, and even a girl in the top most corner seems to be doodling instead of paying attention.
Mina is used to it. So she just turns to the kids and looks at their hands held up for her to choose one. She points at a girl with thin pigtails and a blue hair clip.
“Whales?”
“That’s right. Some whales filter feed. The ones called baleen whales. They’re the ones whose teeth look like toothbrushes.” Mina grits her teeth and pretends to brush her teeth with her finger, making the kids laugh in the way only kids can.
“Any other?” Mina asks.
“Stingrays.” A boy says without being asked.
Mina looks at him and does a little motion to remind him to wait to be called. Then she shakes her head. “Actually stingrays don’t. But some species of ray do. Can anyone tell me which?”
A motion makes Mina look up. The girl with the sketchpad has her hand up but eyes on the sketchpad on her knees.
“Yes?” Mina points up at her.
It takes the girl a moment to realize Mina is addressing her, but then she looks at Mina for a second. Then at the whale shark behind Mina.
“Mantas?”
“That’s right.” Mina says, smiling at the girl before she turns back to the entire audience. “Have you ever seen in movies or cartoons how manta rays can open their mouths really wide? That’s the same thing as our friend the whale shark does.”
A few little mouths fall slightly opens and others let out soft “ Ohh ”’s.
“And now you know a little more about the whale shark.” Mina finishes her presentation. She does this every day of the entire summer season, two times a day. But the kids are different every time, so it’s okay that she has to be the exact same. And besides, it pays well and she has to do something while school is out.
“For information, the banded penguins will be fed in twenty minutes in building C, and my colleague will be holding a lecture about the deep see on the first floor. Thank you so much for your attention, and feel free to ask me questions afterwards if you have any.”
Applauds spread through the crowd and Mina does a polite bow, stepping back towards the glass, watching as the families get up and start shuffling along to a different part of the huge aquarium. Then she turns to look into the huge blue tank, watching the whale shark swim unbothered around in her kingdom. She takes a turn in the opposite and moves elegantly through the water towards Mina. and Mina presses her hand to the glass as the whale shark angles and exposes her belly right across the surface where Mina has her hand.
Mina likes to believe they’re friends.
“Miss?”
Mina turns around. A man stands with his daughter on his hip. “My daughter was wondering if you know why whale sharks have spots.”
Mina looks at the little girl “Well it’s for camouflage. It hides easier if it’s not just one color. It’s just like why cheetahs have spots. It makes it easier to hide.”
The girl has stars in her eyes, and Mina smiles at her.
“Thank you, miss.” The girl says quietly. Then she looks at her dad shyly, and the dad nods.
“Thank you. That was all.”
“Of course.”
Mina watches as the dad walks off with his daughter, joining the mom and an older boy at the top of the little open auditorium. Mina thinks these are the moments that makes her love sundays.
Too soon however, Sunday is replaced by monday and the guests change from mainly ebing families to mainly being school classes. On days like these Mina uses a different approach to teach, using more formal language and less baby shark analogies. But the effect is the same. The kids walk away with a greater understanding of how the world under the sea works, and Mina feels maybe there’ll always be a place for her in between the two worlds, right where the sky meets the sea. And at the end of the day, the buzzing of students quieten and the feeling of submergence takes over as Mina walks through the dark halls of the deep sea exhibition, the seas behind the glass leaving the world illuminated only in shades of blue.
A few guests still shuffle around to get one more look at the odd world so strange and so fascinating, an entire world onto which humans can only ever look or visit but never become a part of. Yet there is apparently one student who has decided to attempt to defy this claim. Alone in the area, the only student left, she sits on a little bench in front of a reef display. The white backpack is too big for her petite body and it’s decorated with symbols and drawings and letters in english. She has her back to Mina and her head bent over a sketchbook.
She must have been forgotten.
“Excuse me? Which grade do you belong to?” Mina asked softly, tapping the girl’s shoulder gently.
The girl turns her head, the short black hair whipping around her hair. Mina frowns. She looks familiar. Has she been here before? The big eyes are certainly distinctive.
“Sorry? What do you mean grade ?”
The more Mina looks at her, the more she realizes there’s a very real possibility that Mina has assumed wrong. While the black blazer could certainly be presumed to be a part of a school uniform, the Nirvana shirt and ripped jeans definitely don’t sort into that category.
“Oh, the other students, they- I thought-” Mina clears her throat.
“Oh, I’m not in high school.” the girl looks a little awkward at the situation. “I’m twenty one.”
Mina’s cheeks warm immediately and she stands up fully. “O-okay. Well the aquarium closes in twenty minutes.”
“I know.” the girl says, not unkindly.
Mina nods and turns around, walking away as normally as she can. Though she can’t help but feel particularly awkward at this encounter. Maybe because she had just mistaken a grown woman for a kid or maybe just because of how said woman had looked at her.
…
The awkwardness stays with Mina through the end of the shift as she avoids the girl until she’s absolutely sure she’s out of the aquarium. It’s just the thing that their encounter isn’t singular. Not only because Mina realizes she has been here before, but because she shows up two days later, sitting in a little indentation of the nurse sharks’ tank, drawing stingrays on her sketchpad as they float by. It’s a special feature of this tank, allowing for an immersive experience, with water on three sides and above.
Mina can’t help but stop and look, at least for a second. It’s such a mesmerizing sight, honestly. But doesn’t this girl have something else to do but sit here? Shouldn’t she have school or work?
“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?”
Mina jumps. The girl’s eyes had found hers, though only for a second as they stared into the big blue once more, pen softly in her hand.
“Yeah. They are.” Mina doesn’t really know what else to say. The only thing that really comes to her mind about this particular subject is their feeding strategies, and it’s surely not what this girl wants to know. But even before Mina manages to find a subject that might be fitting if Mina isn’t to walk away, the girl turns to Mina again.
“Is this accurate?” The girl angles her sketchbook. There’s a few sketches of the cartilage skeleton of a ray, clearly from google images, and some more rough motion sketches that Mina guesses she has been working on today.
“Yeah,” Mina nods, looking down at the girl. “why?”
“Oh, it’s for a project. I’m researching for this big art project I’m working on. But I want to do these guys justice.”
“Is that why you’re here?” Mina asks without really thinking about it.
“What do you mean?” The girl seems confused, and Mina can’t blame her.
“I mean, most people don’t come here for several days in a row.” Mina explains.
The girl presses her lips together. Then she smiles. “I’m Chaeyoung.”
“Mina.” Mina says automatically. She’s a little taken aback by the complete change in the gi- in Chaeyoung’s manner, but she tries not to let it show. But that seems to be the end of the conversation, and Mina feels the same awkwardness as she did at their first encounter. She’s just not sure what it is. But she’s debating whether she should announce her departure or just walk away.
Mina looks down at Chaeyoung’s sketchbook again. There’s more rays on it now. She’s fast and sharp, the little doodles somehow alive.
“Mina?”
“Hm?” Mina finds Chaeyoung’s eyes, an almost magical turquoise shine from the aquarium mixing with the deep brown.
“Isn’t your show starting soon?” Chaeyoung asks.
Mina stands straight and clears her throat. Looks at the time on her slim wrist watch. Nods. “Yeah. It’s- uh, I should actually get to that.”
“I’ll walk with you.” Chaeyoung says unworriedly, getting to her feet and picking up her white backpack.
Mina wants to ask, why , but doesn’t want to risk being rude. So she just lets Chaeyoung trail after her to the big tank, to Mina’s favorite place, where the slightly curved front of a tank takes up the height of at least two stories, and the whale shark gently swims in the background.
Chaeyoung doesn’t follow her down. Instead she takes a seat in the top-most right corner, right by the stairs. Mina stops a few steps further down, looking up at her. It’s a familiar sight. But Chaeyoung doesn’t seem to find it weird. She just smiles and turns to a new page in her sketchbook. So Mina just walks the last steps down towards her spot in front of the glass, watching as the whale shark swims closer. For a while now, Mina has been sure of its intelligence. It knows Mina is there.
“She’s pretty.” Chaeyoung calls from the top of the steps.
Mina turns around, a hand on the glass. “She’s gorgeous.”
“Does she have a name?” Chaeyoung wonders. There’s a twitch in her stature for a moment but then she relaxes.
Mina shakes her head. “We don’t name them.”
Chaeyoung nods. Then she smiles, and turns to her sketchpad again. Mina turns to the tank. Looks at the whale shark now swimming away but in a smaller circle, back towards Mina. It’s a mesmerizing sight, seeing her friend swim around like that.
“Miss?”
Mina turns around.
“Can you tell us where the bathrooms are, please?” A woman asks, standing with a boy who looks embarrassed and shy.
“Oh, of course. Around the walkway here and to your right, on the other side of the cafeteria.” Mina directs them. For a moment Mina watches as they walk away, then turns to look at Chaeyoung again. But Chaeyoung is immersed in her drawings, and Mina doesn’t want to be a disturbance to her. So she focuses on the slowly filling seats, and then on completing her presentation of her spotted friend behind the glass.
Chaeyoung is gone by the time Mina finishes the lecture.
Mina doesn’t see her at all for the rest of the day, and in the end, Mina is forced to conclude that she must have left. It’s a weird feeling, looking for someone in a crowd like she has been today. But there’s something about the way Chaeyoung makes her drawings come alive, that makes Mina feel a little more alive too.
Maybe that’s why Mina keeps looking. Not just that day, but the next day too. And the day after that. She looks for a pen, a sketchpad, a white backpack, colorful letters, a colorful mind, searches for the short black hair hidden in the crowd. But it’s neither of those she sees.
It’s her eyes.
…
It’s Thursday and Mina is doing a private tour for a wealthy businessman and his family, telling the stories of the reefs to them. It’s a special part of the aquarium, where they walk, with tanks like walls, and the coral reef inside of it, a labyrinth of rock and water, each tank visible from two sides or more. And just as Mina crouches to point out a longnose butterfly fish to a girl around ten, they’re there. The eyes. Chaeyoung’s eyes. They’re staring at her through the aquarium. She’s sitting on the other side of the aquarium, a curious smile on her lips and the sketchbook in her lap.
A titan triggerfish swims between them, breaking their eye-contact. Mina still looks. But Chaeyoung is drawing now.
“Is that the Dory fish, miss?” the little girl asks.
Mina looks up at her from her crouched position and then looks to where she’s pointing.
“Yeah it is.” Mina nods. “It’s called a blue tang.”
“It’s so big…” the little girl says in awe.
“It can grow up to ten-twelve inches, actually.” Mina points out. The one the girl pointed at is eight inches at most. “This is a male, so he’s probably not fully grown yet.”
“That’s so cool.” The girl says happily.
Mina chuckles and looks past the reef again. She can feel it this time, Chaeyoung’s eyes on her. The entire vision of her is blurred by the water and the reef and the fishes swimming by, and it gives off an air of Chaeyoung sitting on the bottom of the ocean, drawing the fishes in their natural habitats as if she had sat in a cafe drawing the people coming by.
Mina wants nothing more than to sit down and observe, but it’s not the time. So instead she gets back up and offers the little girl her hand as she continues the tour around the reef.
Still, the image of Chaeyoung stays with Mina like a song stuck in her head, like gentle piano muted by the bubbles of moving water. Completely submerged. And though it’s unbeknownst to Mina why she’s so curious about the girl, she doesn’t question it much. Just like she doesn’t question how she’s drawn to the sea. And just like the sea so faithful, Chaeyoung is still sitting there inside the reef exhibition an hour later when Mina walks by. She’s still drawing, an almost fresh page as far as Mina can see.
“Which one was your favorite to draw so far?” Mina asks.
Chaeyoung looks up, completely unsurprised at Mina’s presence. She must’ve seen her in the glass, or maybe just sensed her as Mina senses Chaeyoung.
“The sea pens.” Chaeyoung says, turning a page back in her notebook. There are five of them drawn next to each other. “They’re so odd, they really look like a quill, but they’re an animal.”
Mina couldn’t help but like that Chaeyoung chose a non-fish.
“They’re fascinating. They could’ve evolved like so many other species but they just stayed there. Because they’re perfect like that, a quill in the sea.”
“Makes you think Pokemon wasn’t too far off with all their odd creatures sometimes.” Chaeyoung notes casually.
Mina chuckles. “Yeah.”
“Which is your favorite?” Chaeyoung asks.
Mina crouches down beside her. Looks at Chaeyoung for a moment and then at the reef in front of them. She considers it for a moment. Considers the weird build of the humphead wrasse and the curious patterning of the butterfly fishes. But in the end she always comes back to the same one.
“I know it’s corny but I really love the lionfish.” Mina smiles.
“That’s not corny. It’s gorgeous.”
“It’s more than that though, just it’s entire evolutionary history is so fascinating, how something so poisonous can grow to become so beautiful and terrifying, simply for the purpose of not using its poison. There’s something almost poetic and kind about that.”
“What do you mean, don’t they use their venom to kill?” Chaeyoung asks curiously, her eyes on a lionfish swimming by slowly, it’s fins swaying with the stream of the water.
“No. They swallow their prey whole.” Mina says, then continues, sitting down fully. “The poison is defense, and the coloration is- well, like how really colorful frogs are almost always poisonous?”
Chaeyoung’s mouth opens slightly and she let’s out a soft “ Ohh… ”
There’s a moment. A small moment where Mina wonders if she should be sitting here. If she shouldn’t be going somewhere else. It’s that awkwardness that so oddly contrasts her desire to submerge herself in any conversation, anything this girl says with that soft voice.
It’s almost as if Chaeyoung senses it. Because she changes the page and starts outlining the body of what looks to become a cod.
“Do you know anything about the sea pens?”
“It’s my job to.” Mina says softly. “But yeah.”
“Tell me?” Chaeyoung asks.
Mina frowns. She’s not really allowed to just sit here and talk to one visitor. She’s supposed to keep an eye on the entire place, and help people with any info they might not be able to acquire.
But she tells about the sea pens anyways. And she watches as the body of the cod turns into a lionfish with every word Mina says, and without realizing the time, twenty minutes pass on the cool floor in front of the glass.
“I hope you don’t get fired for this.” Chaeyoung notes as she looks down at the finished drawing of the lionfish.
“What? Oh-” Mina looks down at the wrist watch and quickly gets up. “Oh my god, I’m sorry I have to- uh, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry. I can’t hope to hog you all day.” Chaeyoung shrugs gently. Everything about her is so… gentle. “I’ll find you before I leave.”
“Okay.” Mina’s cheeks feel warm with embarrassment once more, and she takes a few steps in the wrong direction before correcting it and walking the other way. Chaeyoung’s soft chuckle sounds in her ears and she curses herself for getting so caught up in conversation.
“She’s cute.” a voice says behind Mina just as she settles against the main information desk.
Mina spins immediately, seeing her colleague, Sana, another girl from her foreign exchange program, sitting there behind the desk with her earpiece in and a smirk on her face.
“Who?” Mina plays dumb.
“The girl.” Sana raises a brow. “The one with the backpack?”
Okay caught. “Oh, yeah she asks a lot of questions. She’s doing research so I’m helping her out.”
“Mhm.” Sana notes dryly. But just as Mina is about to argue, the phone rings and Sana picks up immediately, a smug expression on her face as she greets the person on the other end.
Mina rolls her eyes and Sana smiles. Then Mina walks away, towards the coffee cart. She’s supposed to relieve Felix in- well three minutes ago.
…
It’s not that Mina actively waits around for Chaeyoung to come say goodbye. It’s just that the hours pass and Mina doesn’t even see her wandering around. By three she’s not in the reef gallery anymore and nowhere to be found anywhere else either. And Mina can’t exactly actively go looking for her, there’s no valid reason to. So Mina just does her job and waits. She even waits until the clock strikes six and the aquarium closes. Chaeyoung has after all been there until closing before.
Not this time however.
“She went home about an hour ago.” Sana says after about thirty seconds of Mina hanging around the entrance.
“Oh.” Mina just says. She probably just couldn’t find Mina. Or maybe she forgot. It’s not like she owes Mina anything.
“You like her?”
“Please, I barely know her.” Mina scoffs, pushing herself off the information desk. “She just said she’d come say goodbye before she left so I figured maybe she would.”
“I’m sorry, hun.” Sana leans forward, grabbing Mina’s hand and giving it a squeeze. Mina sends her a little smile.
“Come on, it’s not the end of the world. Like I said, barely know her. You on tomorrow?”
Sana lets go of Mina’s hand and stretches. “I’m on every day this month.”
“Me too. I really need the money for next semester.” Mina groans.
“Imagine spending your entire summer stuck in an aquarium? God, I can’t wait to get a proper job and go on a nice vacation.” Sana huffs. “Want to get a drink tonight? I could use one.”
“Not tonight, sorry. Another time, I promise.” Mina says. She never excuses it. She never has to. Sana knows sometimes Mina just doesn’t care for company. It doesn’t make them any less friends. It makes them better friends, in fact. Because Mina trusts her enough to say no.
“Check before closing up?” Sana asks, finally getting up from her chair.
“Yeah. Usual rounds?” Mina asks. They usually check each their usual half. Sana checks the kids pool, the cafeteria and bathrooms, the gift shop and the outside. Mina comes to find her outside when she’s checked the exhibits.
“Meet you in ten.” Sana says.
Mina nods. Then she heads down her usual path, going through every exhibition to check for lost pacifiers, sunglasses or people still wandering about. But it’s completely empty. Not even a lost teddy. Still, even if she can see it’s empty, Mina walks down the stairs to the whale shark, just to watch it for a second.
And there it is. On the front row, completely unnoticeable, a rip-out of a sketchbook.
I had to leave in a hurry, and I couldn’t find you.
The words were scribbled on the page with the lionfish. Not a name, not anything more descriptive. Just a lionfish and a few words.
Mina takes the paper and studies the features of the lionfish, instinctively walking over to the glass to feel the cold surface under her hand.
“I think I made a friend today.” Mina says, eyes travelling from the paper into the tank.
The whale shark closes in from afar, swimming so close that Mina fears it might collide with the glass. But it takes a downwards curve and around. Mina studies its spots for a little, and the whale shark swims slowly in little routes close to Mina.
Mina pockets the paper before joining Sana, settling on the rock next to her. The outside area overlooks the open sea, and they have gotten the habit of sitting on the rocks creating a boundary between them and the great unknown.
It’s only a few minutes like that. But it’s what they both need before they close up and go home, only to come back early the next day.
And the next.
And the next after that. And exactly on this day, she’s back. Chaeyoung is there again, right by the stairs, top row, with her sketchbook and distant eyes and stolen glances. And Mina tells stories to the kids and does impressions and bows when they clap. She waits until the hall is empty.
“I thought you might not come back.” Mina says, walking up the steps as Chaeyoung walks down them.
“I still have a week more before I have to be done with the setup.” Chaeyoung comes to a half two steps above Mina. She has a hand on the railing and a softness in her stance. “There’s still some stuff I don’t have done yet. A little more research I need to do.”
Mina looks up at her, not daring to take another step. It would be too intimate. “I’m glad. The other visitors notice you. My friend says they talk about the girl who draws.”
Chaeyoung gives a little chuckle. “Yeah, kids keep coming up to me asking me what I’m doing.”
“You’re good, that’s why. They’re impressed.” Mina nods in the direction of the top of the stairs, silently asking Chaeyoung to walk with her.
Chaeyoung seems to get it, because she turns and walks up the stairs, still looking back at Mina. “I hope it will be worth it in the end.”
“What is it exactly you’re doing?” Mina asks as they reach the top.
Chaeyoung makes way for Mina, letting her lead them wherever she needs to go. “Well it’s this museum uptown, they searched at my school for someone to do kind of an interactive project on the sea as a part of an exhibit on seafarer’s culture around the world. You know, so it’s not just shipwrecks and stuff but you really feel underwater and around the pacifics especially with the reefs.”
“That sounds amazing.” Mina can’t help but imagine it already, what it will look like. “But that means next week you’ll stop coming around?”
“You sound disappointed.” Chaeyoung notes, not coyly.
“The kids aren’t the only ones who likes looking at your drawings.” Mina admits with a shrug. “They’re so alive. I bet the project will look amazing.”
Chaeyoung stops at a tank with seahorses right inside their pacific showroom. The seahorses live secluded in a little tank away from the bigger reef-showings.
“Do you know what that species is that looks like it has leaves instead of limbs?” Chaeyoung asks.
“The leafy seadragons?” Mina asks.
“That’s their name?” Chaeyoung snorts. “I thought it would be more majestic.”
“Well it’s latin name is Phycodurus eques, if that’s more appropriate.” Mina shrugs.
“How do you know that. You don’t even have those here, do you?” Chaeyoung looks around, but this is the only tank with seahorses the aquarium has.
“No, I just have a sponge for a brain. I did a course on pacific reef ecology a few semesters ago, and it was really interesting so I just remember random facts from it.” Mina tries to explain. Her brain is really a weird place, but if it interests her then it kind of just glues in and sticks.
“So you’re a real smarty pants then.” Chaeyoung crosses her arms. “I like that.”
“It’s going to be my job, I need to know these things.”
“I thought it was your job, or wait, are you a scammer?” Chaeyoung asks almost dramatically, inhaling sharply and suspiciously at Mina.
Mina laughs. Chaeyoung looks like that was the purpose all along, and relaxes again.
“I’m going to be a marine biologist.” Mina explains. “I’m starting my senior year in a few weeks. I guess it’s my way of becoming a part of the sea.”
“So then you won’t be here either?” Chaeyoung asks.
Mina shakes her head. “Only on the weekends.”
“We’re both here on borrowed time, then.” Chaeyoung smiles.
“I guess, yeah.” Mina nods. Chaeyoung looks around. “I forgot, which way is the tank for the whitetip shark?”
Mina’s usual tour-guide manners almost takes over, but she stops herself from pointing, and instead just walks with Chaeyoung around to the tank. They only have one whitetip shark, and only because it was injured too bad to go back into nature, but it thankfully fared well this past year they’ve had it, though Mina always worry about it.
“It’s so crazy that something like that lives just out in the ocean.” Chaeyoung says.
“I love it.” Mina says. “It’s a reminder that there’s a part of the world that isn’t for us. And as much as I wished I could be a part of it, it’s not my territory. It’s his.”
Chaeyoung hums and takes off the backpack. Then she settles on the floor in front of the tank and draws out her sketchbook.
Mina wants to join, but knows that she can’t. She has to get back to work. There’s a group of elderly coming soon for a guided tour.
“I’ll stop by later.” Mina says.
Chaeyoung smiles up at her. “Okay.”
Mina looks down at the sketchbook to see an angular shape like a disfigured rhombus.
…
Mina doesn’t stop by later.
At least not in time.
The tour with the elderly takes so long that by the time they pass the whitetip shark tank, there’s no-one else there, and the white backpack is not to be seen anywhere after that either. It’s as if she’s not truly real, this Chaeyoung. As if she disappears into thin air. Or maybe they’re just not meant to keep meeting. In that case, however, why does she run into Chaeyoung just as often as Chaeyoung disappears on her? Because the next day she’s there again. And Mina just wants to talk to her. But she’s kept busy with everything else, and has to settle in the end for just glancing at her through the reef displays. To see her standing inside the big walkway underneath the nurse shark tank and to see her at the top of the steps during Mina’s lecture.
It’s the last part that makes her heart beat faster. Because Chaeyoung must have heard that lecture at least five times by now. But she still sits there every time. And Mina can find no common denominator except for herself. Which means there’s a chance that she’s really just sitting there to listen to Mina. Because if she were there to study the whale shark, why would she choose the most occupied moment?
It distracts Mina during her presentation, though she tries not to let it show. She doesn’t want to admit how much the appearance of Chaeyoung does to her. Because that means admitting how happy she gets at the end of that day when a tap on her arm makes her turn around to face Chaeyoung, the short hair tucked behind her ears and the bangs uneven.
“I figured if I waited long enough to go home I’d run into you eventually.” Chaeyoung said unabashedly.
Mina doesn’t know what to do with that information. How is she supposed to react to someone waiting around for her? Because the reaction she’s having is one of joy, but she’s not sure why. Or maybe she knows why, and just doesn’t want to see it. The same reason she doesn’t admit why she has the drawing of the lionfish laying safely in her nightstand.
“I’m glad.” Mina says.
Chaeyoung opens her mouth. Closes it. Then just smiles. “Have a good day, Mina.”
“You too.” Mina says, but she’s not ready for the conversation to end yet. So she just asks the first best question that comes to mind. Just to stop Chaeyoung from turning around. “Did you draw something interesting today?”
Chaeyoung pauses. Purses her lips, and then nods. “Yeah. I did.”
“Can I see?” Mina asks curiously.
Chaeyoung shakes her head. “I- uh. I mean, okay, hold on.”
Mina frowns. “It’s okay, if you don’t want to show me that’s-”
“No, no. Just-” Chaeyoung takes the backpack off, unzips it and digs into her sketchbook. But when she opens it, it’s at an angle where Mina can’t see, and from the awkward angle Chaeyoung is looking it’s obvious that it’s supposed to be just that. Out of Mina’s sight. It only makes Mina even more curious. But finally it seems Chaeyoung finds the page she’s looking for. She turns the sketchbook and hands it to Mina.
“The rest are sort of official sketches for the exhibition, I’m not actually allowed to show them.” Chaeyoung explains, though her voice isn’t as calm as usual.
Mina nods. She understands that. And anything Chaeyoung wants to show her is amazing. And this page is absolutely stunning. It’s a study of different species of angelfish, showing their patterns and distinctive marks, little notes scribbled by the sides of each telling what kind of fish it is and why.
“You could show just this at any art exhibit and people would come.” Mina’s eyes travel over the paper. “It’s incredible, they all look alive. I’m halfway expecting them to start swimming along the canvas.”
“What?” Chaeyoung’s voice makes Mina look around at her.
“You know, like in Harry Potter where the images move. I’m halfway convinced these fish are going to start-”
“Oh my god, that’s brilliant.” Chaeyoung interrupts breathlessly. “Sorry, just- I have to go. I’m sorry, thank you. Thank you.”
Mina isn’t sure what’s going on. But next moment there’s a touch of something on her cheek and then Chaeyoung is gone, with her backpack over one shoulder and the sketchbook in her hand.
It takes a full breath to realize Chaeyoung had kissed her cheek. Mina touches the spot, not really understanding the meaning of any of it yet.
The only thing she knows is that Chaeyoung disappears after that. For the entire rest of the week, she’s gone, and Mina can’t help but feel down. She has no clue what to do and even Sana is lost for advice. Yet she can’t help but search for Chaeyoung, even the following monday. But she’s not there. So maybe it really wasn’t her fate to keep running into Chaeyoung. Maybe what Mina is doing by looking for her is challenging her fate.
But if fate isn’t this girl, then how is Mina so taken with her so easily?
It doesn’t make sense.
Exactly. It doesn’t make sense. None of it makes sense except for one thing. Chaeyoung. She makes sense to Mina. Her drawings and her soft spoken words and her laughter. That makes sense. So there’s only one thing to do then.
…
The building is simple but modern, and Mina admires the simple features as she walks up the steps and through the doors into the main hall. It’s huge, overwhelming and white like a christian church, with wide windows and grey stones on the floor, but no decorations. It’s all allows on the wall, showing the way to the different exhibitions.
Mina stops at the information desk and buys a ticket. She doesn’t look at the price. She just pockets the ticket and walks into the museum, following the arrows towards the seafarer exhibit. Really, she doesn’t care about much else. Just that exhibit. Just Chaeyoung’s exhibit.
An arrow pointing left leads Mina swiftly through an exhibition on traditional history and through a hallway. There’s a door at the end, concealing everything beyond it, and Mina pushes it open.
The moment the door closes, Mina is completely submerged. It’s as if she’s inside a tank. The white of the floors and white walls are hidden by darkness and lit up only by projectors in four different shades of blue. Life-size parts of shipwrecks and models of boats used in different cultures and different ages scatter the room that seems to go on forever, all perched on small sandy hills giving the illusion of being at the bottom of the ocean.
And the ocean is alive.
Deep sea ambience mixes with the visuals of projectors showing animated clips of bony fishes, sharks, rays, squids and various cnidarians, bringing the walls and ceilings to life. In crevices between shipwrecks and information posts hide glowing corals, suspended in time by the paper mache material that makes them, but strangely alive even so.
Everything is alive.
Most of all Mina.
She stands in the midst of a creation she watched come to life through the glimpses into a sketchbook, and suddenly understands.
Mina touches her cheek, and takes another step into the room. And as the walls lead her along a labyrinth in time and space, she sees more species, more ecosystems, more ways of crossing the ocean, more curiosity towards this world unknown.
“This is amazing…” Mina breathes, letting her gaze fall to one of the information stands, trailing a hand over the sketch of a manta drawn on the edge of the sheet telling about pacific reefs.
The minutes turn to hours, and Mina is still not done looking. But the museum is closing and Mina has no choice but to take her eyes from the walls and walk back out. Still, as she walked out, there was a part of her that had hoped to find her there. A part of her that hoped to see her standing in there waiting for Mina.
But that’s not the kind of fairy tale Mina’s story is. So instead she does the only thing she can think of.
“Excuse me?” Mina looks through the glass separating the inside and outside of the information desk.
“Yes?” a professional voice says. The woman is young though there’s an older soul in her eyes.
“I was wondering,” Mina tries, not really sure how to go about it without revealing her true purpose. “The artist who did the work of the seafarer’s exhibition. Is it possible to get in touch with- uh, with them.”
“I’m sorry, miss, we can’t disclose that information.” The woman says, a sad little smile on her lips. “The artist asked to be completely anonymous.”
“Not even if I’m looking to hire them for a different project?” Mina knows it’s a lie, but she has to try.
“I’m sorry.” The woman shakes her head. “You’re welcome to leave your information, and I’ll give it to them for them to make the choice, but I’ve been prohibited from disclosing their information. They’re very young for such a big job, and I think they don’t want it to define them as an artist.”
Mina nods. Then she draws up a pen and a receipt from her purse and scribbles down her name and number on it.
“What company do you represent?” The woman asks.
“Oh.” Mina feels caught. But she clears her throat, grabs the receipt again and writes down the name of a corporation that probably doesn’t exist. Ocean Love Inc. .
“Ocean Love? I haven’t ever heard of that.” the woman says.
“It’s- it’s new, it’s for informing about ecosystems underwater and how to salvage them.” Mina lies easier than she wants to admit. She just has to hope.
“Sounds interesting. I’ll give this to the artist.” the woman says.
“Thank you.” Mina smiles. “That’s all I’m asking.”
Mina turns to walk away. But barely has she gotten two steps before a voice calls.
“Mina?”
Mina turns, heart in her chest.
The receptionist has a hand through the hole in the glass separating the information desk from the rest of the museum, and she’s holding a pen.
“You forgot this.”
“Oh. Yeah, thanks.” Mina blushes and walks back. She takes the pen and turns on her heel, walking away once more.
No-one calls her name this time. There’s no magic. Just hope.
…
The whale shark turns its belly towards Mina as she caresses the glass ever so gently. It’s been a week, and Mina hasn’t heard anything. Most likely the receptionist looked up the company and found out it wasn’t real. Or Chaeyoung just decided it wasn’t worth it. But fact of the matter is, that since the day at the museum, Mina has longed for submergence even more than ever. She just wants to give into the blue and let her hand run over the coarse skin of the whale shark.
She really hoped for magic. For a while. But maybe she didn’t need to. Maybe she should’ve just hoped for Chaeyoung.
“Hi...”
Mina retracts her hand and spins around all at once. To say that her heart is stuck in her throat is more than just an understatement. It feels more like her heart is filling every space in her body, pulse rapid and dominating her conscience.
Chaeyoung stands at the top of the stairs, leaned against the railing with the backpack over her shoulders and a sketchbook in her hand.
“I- Ch… Chaeyoung.” Mina doesn’t know what she’s trying to say. But Chaeyoung just smiles and starts descending the stairs. “The aquarium is closing soon.”
“I know.” Chaeyoung smiles, still only halfway down the steps. “I came to say goodbye.”
“You’re leaving?” Mina asks. She can’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach. She doesn’t want Chaeyoung to leave.
“For today.” Chaeyoung finally reaches the bottom of the steps. “The aquarium is closing, remember?”
“You’ve been here a long time?” Mina asks. What if she could’ve had more time?
“Only a few minutes.” Chaeyoung walks closer. “I just stopped by to give you this.”
Chaeyoung holds out the sketchbook she’s been holding. It’s the one she’s been using the entire time while researching for the exhibit.
“You paid entry just for a few minutes?” Mina asks, gently taking the sketchbook. She doesn’t know what else to do.
“Your friend let me in without a ticket.” Chaeyoung shrugs, a little smile on her lips. “Sana?”
“Gonna kill her.” Mina mumbles. Then she looks down at the sketchbook again. “Can I open it?”
“Of course.” Chaeyoung nods. “It’s yours.”
Mina bites her lip. And ever so gently she opens it. The first page is all cods, the next is piranhas, the third mussels and clams. And page after page fills with creatures, one more magical than the next until there’s one that’s different. Mina frowns. It’s her whale shark. And it’s her. A dark silhouette with a hand on the glass and her whale shark swimming towards it.
Every page since then is different. A reef and a girl with a child. The silhouette of a girl inside a tunnel of water. And each time, the girl isn’t dominating the water and the fishes. She’s just a part of it.
Mina closes the book.
“They’re all me.”
“You wanted to be a part of the sea.” Chaeyoung shrugged.
Mina doesn’t know what to say. She just looks at the book and then at Chaeyoung. No-one has ever done something like this for her. No-one has ever sought her like Chaeyoung is.
“Can I call you some time?” Chaeyoung asks, only as if to further Mina’s disbelief at the entire situation.
“You don’t have my number..” Mina breathes.
“Sure I do.” Chaeyoung smiles. Then she draws up a receipt from her pocket, a curious expression on her face. “Ocean love, huh?”
Mina blushes and clutches the sketchbook a little closer. “I had to come up with something.”
“You’re lucky Jihyo knew who you are.” Chaeyoung grins.
“Who?” Mina feels slightly lost.
“The receptionist.” Chaeyoung clarifies. “Her name is Jihyo. I told her about you a few times. So when she saw your name on the paper she figured it out.”
Oh. So that’s… okay. So Mina is exactly as transparent as she always hoped she wasn’t.
“Caught, huh?”
“Seems that way.” Chaeyoung says. She’s so close. And Mina can’t help but find her as immersive as the sea itself, with her eyes so big and wonderful, only looking at Mina.
Mina swallows. They’re so exposed here. And it seems Chaeyoung senses it. Because she turns her eyes to the big tank and presses her hand against the cold glass. Mina looks at her. Looks at the whale shark as it closes in, making a downwards curve and then it happens. It exposes it’s belly and swims upwards gliding over the place where Chaeyoung’s hand is.
The sight takes Mina’s breath away and makes thought impossible. The only thing she knows is that she moves, hand on Chaeyoung’s free arm, the other still clutching the notebook. And with a nudge of the nose, Mina turns Chaeyoung’s face to her and catches her lips.
Soft lips and gentle movements take over Mina’s entire mind and she loses herself in Chaeyoung’s presence. In the angling of her face and the soft inhale through her nose to keep the kiss going.
It feels like floating.
It feels endless.
Until it’s over. Until Mina resurfaces, breathless and desperate for air, yet never letting go of Chaeyoung. She’s never done being submerged.
“So, can I call you some time?” Chaeyoung asks again, as if nothing had happened.
Mina considers it, trying to regain a little composure. “Or you could just wait for me to close up? We can go somewhere?”
Chaeyoung’s lips split in a wide grin, and she nods. “Yeah, okay. Where?”
Mina wonders for a second. Yet, a part of her already knows.
…
The sand is warm under Mina’s feet and she sun shines powerfully even in the late hours of the day. It feels like summer might last forever. She turns and looks back at Chaeyoung, the younger sitting on the plaid shirt she had previously worn over her tank-top. The top of her hair is tied in a tiny bun and she’s working on a page in a different sketchbook, the white backpack open beside her. Mina’s sketchbook is in the black bag next to it.
Mina knows Chaeyoung is drawing her. It makes her feel both shy and elated, but she lets herself lose for once, moving in the warm air on the warm sand heading towards the water. She can hear Chaeyoung’s laugh as Mina retreats for a wave, saving her the cool experience of the water for a moment. Then she walks out into wet sand once more, the thin cotton blouse catching in the wind and her hair a right mess around her face.
The water comes as a blessing and a curse, making her jump and laugh and turn around to Chaeyoung. Chaeyoung is smiling, her eyes switching between the canvas and her object.
Mina feels the next wave rush over her feet and up her calves. She doesn’t have a bathing suit, or she would’ve probably just jumped in and become one with the ocean for a moment. But at least she can walk a little further out. Just to feel the ocean on her skin a little longer. In the crevice of her knee, on her thighs, and even as heaviness a corner of the cotton blouse catches in a wave and soaks.
Mina turns again, looking back at Chaeyoung. Chaeyoung is no longer doodling, instead sitting with her arms resting on her knees, looking unabashedly at Mina. It’s completely new and wonderfully exciting. And it draws Mina from the water, over the sand, the grains catching in the water on her skin, all the way to Chaeyoung. She settles on her knees in front of Chaeyoung, hand on the plaid shirt and a smile on her face.
“Enjoying the view?” Mina asks, trying not to sound too shy.
“Always.” Chaeyoung says as casually had asked her opinion on the weather. And it’s not arrogance, the way Chaeyoung answers. It’s just unashamed honesty. And it makes Mina’s stomach bubble excitedly.
Chaeyoung lowers a knee and puts a hand over Mina’s, tilting her head slightly.
“We barely know each other.” Mina smiles, leaning closer nonetheless, lifting off her seated position to near Chaeyoung’s face.
“Sounds like a challenge.” Chaeyoung says quietly, hand moving up Mina’s arm.
“I like challenges.” Mina says, not unaware of just how intimate they are now, Mina leaned as close as she can without tipping over and colliding with Chaeyoung.
“See? I already know you better.” Chaeyoung mutters. The shyness is taking over for once. It’s cute.
“Come with me.” Mina says, so close that her breath puffs onto Chaeyoung’s lips.
“Where to?” Chaeyoung’s voice is barely there.
Mina smiles. Then she adjusts her stance and leans in fully, pressing her lips to Chaeyoung’s for a moment. But only for a moment. Then she draws back, swiftly grasping Chaeyoung’s hand, getting to her feet and dragging Chaeyoung with her.
“The sea.” Mina smiles.
And with Chaeyoung’s hand in hers, she chases the waves for one glorious night at the end of the summer, curious and careless enough to let it carry into forever.