Chapter Text
It’s been a year since I was dumped here in Thedas. For everyone’s information, I came from a lineage not too far from Ancient Elvhen and was considered in our world a Goddess. I was living a normal life. Talking and interacting to regular people – that was my everyday life. But one day, while I was wondering the woods around my house and testing my abilities to travel to different realms, a green tear popped out of nowhere and surprise, surprise – I was in Thedas in an instant. For a not so popular Goddess back in my world, I was very observant of what was happening to different worlds. You might say, I can travel to different realms, but I never attempted to do it. Also, somewhat I got the ability of my mother to see into the past and future. And so when I opened my eyes in wonderful landscape of Thedas, ( I think it was the Emerald Graves, where I fell) memories of the place came flooding to my mind. I blacked out of course. That too much information was overwhelming that my brain can’t keep up. After taking a few deep breaths, I felt myself absorbing the nature’s power. I think Thedas itself wants me to take whatever power or pure essence it has left. Saying that I’ll be okay. I discovered that I had newfound abilities the same to those who belonged to Arlathan.
While wandering the forest of the emerald graves, I stumbled to different animals and plants. I was in awe of how tall the trees are and how green are the leaves. I also saw some of the ruins of the great Arlathan and felt as if my heart was breaking. I left the ruins and saw people gathering in a place. There I first saw a camp with an Inquisition banner. How do I know that? As I search for the memory of it in my head, yes. I think they already secured this part of Thedas.
A year ago…
Knowing all the important people currently present in Haven was to my advantage. First, I went to a scout and asked for someone that will hire me as a bard of sorts. Then, I was directed to talk to Leliana – the spymaster of the newly established Inquisition. I know this will be a tough fight with the so-called left hand of the divine, but I have to take my chances to survive here in this place.
“Sister Nightingale?” I called not far from her tent. She eyed me curiously and dismissed her scouts.
“Yes. What can I help you, bard?” I was surprised that she knew what I was capable to do. I looked at her and trying to put some words into my mouth when she walked towards me. I backed away instinctively and she stopped midway.
“How----??? How did you???”
“Are you not a bard? Just looking with the clothing and instruments you have at your back; I know you are one but what kind?” I gulped and trying to calm myself and taking deep breaths I finally found my voice.
“Yes. Indeed. I was directed here by one of your scouts, which I don’t know who is, but yes here I am.” I tried to look confident in my speech, but it seems I just can’t. The looks she’s giving were very intimidating. If looks could kill. I thought to myself.
She was just looking at me and waiting for me to finish my speech. Then I looked her in the eyes and finally found some courage to talk to her. There’s no point about lying to this woman. I just must show her what am I.
“There’s no way to explain who I am without showing you something otherworldy. Perhaps, we could talk in private?” I said to her and she nodded. I sighed very deep because of the relief I felt when she agreed. She led me to the dungeon of the chantry and there I try to compose myself.
“What is it then that you want to show me?” she asked but I know a knife was already waiting for my throat to be sliced whenever I attempted something she didn’t like.
“All right. But please will you promise to not kill me, I’m just here to help?”
She just nodded. She stayed far away from me. I positioned myself in the center of the dungeon and started to turn myself to my original form.
As I looked at her, she was in awe with what she was seeing right now.
“Are you----Are you Andraste???” she asked me.
“Ughh..this is hard to explain. I am what you call a goddess but not from this world. Do I really look like Andraste?”
She just nodded.
“I---that is terrifying…I didn’t know someone from other realm will look like me. I mean what are the chances right?” and now I’m talking to myself. I looked at her again, but I saw her kneeling in front me.
“No..No…No…stand up..don’t kneel. Please.” I dropped a hand in her shoulders and guided her to stand up.
“Leliana, please. Just don’t do that.”
“How did you know who I was?”
“Ughh…that is one I can explain really. To start with I know what will happen to your world. It’s an accident really. I was trying my ability to travel different realms and here I am. Would you believe me if I told you I’m a seer?”
She just nodded.
“Leliana, please talk. I’m not a god here in Thedas. In my world? Yes. But here, I think I’m just a normal mage with some extraordinary abilities.” I sighed and wanted to cry because, yes, I’m a goddess and immortal. But it was before and jumping to this realm just made me a mortal mage. I will die.
“Leliana?” I called to her.
“I---- it’s just overwhelming knowing that you are from a different world and why approach me? what if I didn’t believe you? All of this?”
“It’s a gamble in my part. I knew who you are. And despite that cold personality, I know deep down there,” I pointed to her heart. “There’s still warmth and an understanding person. I wanted to believe that what’s about to happen here in Thedas is just a dream, a story to me. But meeting you and seeing how people walk around outside of this chantry. The cold breeze touching my skin, it felt like I was experiencing life for the first time in my lifetime. Yes, I was goddess. Yes, I was immortal. But here, I’m just bard. I do love singing and dancing. Most of all I want everyone here to smile and be happy despite what happened to the conclave.” I paused for a while and looked at her again. I grabbed her hand. Let my inner self flow thru our hands. The warmth and love I feel for this realm’s people were overwhelming. I know what will happen, but I have to stay quiet about it for the fear of changing events.
She looked at me with teary eyes. And I wanted to hug her. I really do. But before I went for a hug, she just dived into it. I returned the gesture and reassured her that everything will be alright.
“Leliana, I know what happened to the divine devastated every inch of your being, but I know that happened for a reason. I don’t know why I’m here, but I will help this Inquisition of yours to succeed its goal. I will be here every step of the way.”
After some time, she collected herself and smiled at me.
“Are you sure you want my help? Do you believe everything I’ve said?” I asked her.
“As you have said, everything happens for a reason. And with you being here in Thedas is a part of it. So how should we approach the events to happen?”
I smiled at her and squeezed her hand.
“I can’t stay here looking like this. I’ll ask again. Do I really look like Andraste?”
“Yes. You are a spitting image of Her. And yes, you can’t look like that here. Especially when meeting the other members of the Inquisition. Can you transform like one of my scouts?”
“oh... yes... I can…wait…” I willed my magic to transform my body like one of her scouts.
“Yes, this look will be fine. How about meeting the others?”
“About that, can it just be you who knows who I am? besides if I’m to be your scout, I don’t have to meet the others. Besides I don’t know how to fight in close quarters. I’m a mage you know. But mostly I want to spend my time singing and dancing with everyone. Is that all right?”
“Of course. But how will we communicate?”
“Here.” I gave her a crystal that will be our way of communication. “It’s like of those Tevinter crystals. I can talk to you even from afar.”
“Thank you. And I would like to proceed with what you planned you are doing. Be a bard, an entertainer to be precise.”
“Sure. As soon as we are finished here, then I can go to the tavern or, wait can I go outside the gates? I plan to do something near the lake. Or perhaps on the lake.” I suggested to her since I don’t want to take away the job of Maryden in the tavern.
“Are you sure? My scouts will watch from afar for your security. Thank you for helping us.” She squeezed my hands and I returned the same gesture.
“A favor if you may?” she nodded.
“I wanted for this communication to stay between us. You’ll be my contact only and perhaps we can also become friends along the way.” I looked at her and saw gentleness in her eyes.
“Also, to let you know, I just noticed that mages here do get their mana thru the so-called fade, right? And to tell you the truth I can’t connect to your fade. But don’t worry I still got some mana left in me. I’ll just lay low in using magic.”
“Is that life threatening to you?”
“Yes. I think so but as long as I don’t use any abilities that requires so much mana, I’ll live. I will see this through, Leliana. Don’t worry and you have my word!”
“If everything is settled, I’ll be looking for you later. Also, will you tell me what will happen?”
“Of course. Let’s start with…”
I told her every event that will happen. I know that the inquisition right at that moment just stabilized the rift at the center of the conclave. I told her that they met someone who can close the rifts, but I don’t know who it is. She just listened to me very attentively and I think she is taking notes in her head. I told her about the people needed to be hired and will be part of the inner circle. I gave her the details of the missing scouts that will likely happen. The involvement of templars with red lyrium and the supposed indenture of rebel mages to a magister. I also informed her of what will happen when the breach will be closed. The attack in haven and the sacrifice of herald in order to save the whole haven. I can already feel the devastation from her voice whenever she asked about some details about the events. But I told her there were secrets from the inner circle that I can’t really reveal.
“The other events I will tell you after all I’ve said to you took place. Is that alright?”
“Of course, with this information I can plan ahead of time. Will you permit me to let them know that I’m in contact with a seeress? And the other advisers should really know about you.” she then asked. I know that other people, especially of those in the inner circle will likely be against having me as an adviser, so I’ll try to remain as invisible as possible.
“That is alright I think but are you sure it’s good to inform them of this seeress thing? I don’t want them knowing me. Please, I rather be as insignificant as possible. I don’t want to change things. Me telling you of the events to happen, will change some things already but I just cant standby and do nothing.” I told her.
“Indeed, knowing in advance of this events will have a great effect and advantage to the Inquisition but I will just use this if it’s really needed. The herald will be the center of all this, and we should let him know too even you don’t want it.”
“Is he awake?”
“Not long ago.” I sighed. I guess my secrets should be known to the advisers and the herald as well.
“Well then, I’ll wait for you here. Go fetch the herald and the other advisers. It’s best to let them know where your information is coming from.” She nodded and immediately went to get the others.
When Leliana came back, she explained to them who I am. Of course, the commander, which was an ex-templar, will question if I was a demon. Cassandra too. Josephine’s reaction was to be expected from a noble family in Antiva. I just never expected the herald to be so innocent and honest. He just accepted Leliana’s explanation. Oh, I forgot to introduce myself.
“Leliana?” I called and interrupted their heated argument.
“Yes, Lady---?” it seems she got what I was going to tell her.
“Yes, Leliana. I didn’t even introduce myself.” I sighed and looked at her. She smiled at me.
“Indeed. And would you show them who you truly are, like what you just did earlier? But if it will endanger your mana—”
“It’s okay. Transforming to my original form didn’t even spend any of my mana.” I looked with everyone and lastly waited for Leliana’s confirmation. She nodded and so I transformed. In my original form, my height will be like up to the shoulders of Cullen. I have a small face with reddish lips. My breasts are of that average size and my body was of a typical human. My skin was white as porcelain and my eyes are deep ocean blue. My hair is wavy dark blonde that extends up to my feet. I’m wearing a simple white gown that is made of silk and the belt is of gold color emphasizing how small my waist is. Maybe I’m just like your typical human here in Thedas. After transforming, I looked at them and noticed that all of them except Leliana were kneeling. I immediately went to them and asked them to stand.
“Do I really look like her?” I asked them. I was panicking already when Leliana went to me and grabbed my hands.
“Yes, you do.” Leliana answered and everyone was awestruck and can’t even look me in the eyes.
“Really, Cullen? Cassandra? Josephine?” I asked them. Then all of them nodded at the same time.
“Oh my god. REALLY? I mean, I don’t know why but I guess let just keep this appearance to ourselves. Yes?”
“That’s probably the best, My Lady?” oh the ever gentleman and kind Lion of Ferelden.
“No, Lady please. I’m not a noble not here. Before maybe but here and the days that will follow no. I’m just Arh ‘Wen to you. So, let’s start with introductions. My name is Arh ‘Wen and thank you for believing me!”
They smiled warmly and we started discussions on how to approach the events that will happen to Haven and the Herald. Of course, I omitted some details about the inner circle. I don’t want them to oppose Fen’Harel which is Solas by the way. Also, the ever humorous Varric and the others that will be part of the circle in the future.
After the discussion, I transformed my entertainer appearance and was directed to a cabin near the apothecary, which I know where Adan is and at the front of it is where Solas was staying. I don’t mind it but damn, those deep blue eyes with silver flecks on the center. Those eyes are very attractive in a sense that I can’t even take my eyes off them. Well, I was caught instantly by those same eyes looking straight at me. Well, what can I say I was attracted to him the very first time I knew all the things that happened to him. I felt something tugged on my heart. I can’t feel but anger to those who wronged him but really, I was a curious being, so it seems I have to study him too. I don’t really know what I will feel for the coming days. Let’s take one step at a time.
After some thinking while looking in the sky, I find myself humming. Thinking what will happen to me after all of this is done. Where will I’ll be after all this? I asked myself. I don’t really know, myself is hoping that all of what I’ll be doing is for the best. I’ll be just your ordinary entertainer and dancer. I was surprised that Solas came out of his cabin and looked at me with a small smile. Oh my goddess, that was a killer. I found myself reciprocating and walking away my cabin shyly. I don’t know where I’ll be going but damn, I can still feel his eyes on my back. That sent shivers to my spine.
Walking towards the gate, I saw Cullen training his recruits, while Cassandra was smashing some training dummies. I went towards the like and looked for somewhere to sit on. I’m going to practice some song and dance if I must be an entertainer here. I waited for the sun to set and looked at the village where everyone is starting to go to their respective houses to rest.
Sensing that I’ll be quite alone now, I started singing a song that I remember when I was back on my realm. I remember songs that was mostly like modern ones because my realm was quite advance in more ways than one.
I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me
I still feel your touch in my dreams
Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why
Without you it's hard to survive
That very moment, I felt so alone. I don’t know anyone here. When I was in my realm, I do have what you called friends, but I don’t think they know what it really means to be friends. I wanted to cry and just be without any purpose in life.
'Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling
And every time we kiss I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last
Need you by my side
I looked at the sky with the swirling vortex. I stood up and walked towards the frozen lake. I tested if it was safe for me to skate. I was still singing while willing some ice skates on my feet. I felt myself free at that moment when I started sliding on the ice. The cold breeze hitting my face felt very comforting. Then I continued singing while I’m interpreting a slow dance on ice. I don’t know if they will be entertained with what I’ll be doing but at least I have to try.
'Cause every time we touch, I feel the static
And every time we kiss I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so I can't let you go
Want you in my life
Then I tried using my magic by making the music playing in the air around me and lit some tiny lights that will suit the ambience of the song. It feels like I’m a goddess again. Singing without really singing and dancing to the song with fireflies that illuminates my surrounding. I miss my old life but what can I do, I’m here now. Let’s just make it worthwhile.
I was sliding from end to end of the frozen lake. Stretching my arms and legs that portrays every word of the song. I never really noticed that someone was watching when I passed by him.
“A pleasant evening!” he said.
“And to you too. When did you start watching ummm---Mister ---?” I asked but I already know who he I since he already caught my attention in front of my cabin.
“Solas. Just Solas. And you are?”
“Arh ‘Wen , you friendly neighborhood entertainer.” I introduced myself. I can’t seem to tear away my eyes from him. Those eyes and smile were very mesmerizing.
“I was trying to gather some Elfroot for Adan, when I heard someone singing. I followed it and was intrigued. The song was beautiful and the same time sad. You have graceful moves. I only saw one dance like that long ago during my travels in the fade.”
“I see and thank you for the compliment. It’s the first time someone praised me with my songs and dance.” I looked away wanting myself not to cry. “Indeed, a long, long time.” I whispered to myself. A tear slipped my eyes. Turning completely away from Solas I willed myself not to cry that moment but there they are falling freely. I wanted someone to comfort me. I needed someone to support me, to lean to and just be me but I know it will never be him. I was busy convincing myself when I heard him walk towards where I was standing. My heart was beating too fast and I can’t breathe that well.
“Arh ‘Wen ?” he called. But I can’t let him see me so weak.
“Will you watch me finish the song and dance? It’s for free. You will be the first to see this number and you should be honored.” I joked without looking back and slid away from him slowly.
“I will be honored to witness such beautiful song and dance.” I looked at him and hopefully he doesn’t notice my tears. I nodded and continued my performance. I inhaled deep and started singing again.
Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky
They wipe away tears that I cry
The good and the bad times we've been through them all
You make me rise when I fall
I glided on the ice and stretched my arms like flying. I twirled and twirled.
'Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling
And every time we kiss I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last
Need you by my side
I was dancing like a ballerina but on ice. I watched his expression changed from sad to concern. I never danced in front of an audience before. and this moment I don’t want to end. I wanted him inside a shell where nothing can guilt him anymore. I wanted him, not I know why. I just wanted him safe and happy.
'Cause every time we touch, I feel the static
And every time we kiss I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so I can't let you go
Want you in my life
With the last verse of the music, I sang it and slid on the ice towards him. I looked him in the eyes and there I can feel all his walls shattering.