Chapter Text
Leonard McCoy was sitting alone at a table in the rec room, muttering obscenities into his coffee and glaring at anyone who dared come close to his table. All crewmembers knew not to approach the CMO when he was in a mood like this – all except two foolhardy men who were just now entering the rec room and making a beeline for the doctor.
“Morning, Bones,” James T. Kirk said cheerfully, sitting down opposite McCoy.
“Good morning, doctor,” Spock echoed the captain’s sentiment, taking the chair next to Kirk.
“Good morning, my ass,” the doctor grumbled, angrily stabbing his fork into his breakfast with more force than necessary.
Kirk looked at Spock who raised an eyebrow at the doctor’s greeting.
“What’s going on, Bones?” Kirk asked between mouthfuls of porridge.
“Don’t ask,” McCoy replied, still attacking the food on his plate without actually eating anything.
“There is a solution to most problems, doctor,” Spock remarked stirring his herbal tea. “Perhaps if you intimated to us the circumstances of your distress, we could attempt to find a solution.”
McCoy gave him a dark look. “How about a solution to a crazy ex-wife who ignores me most of the time but expects me to pick up he slack when she needs something?”
“Your statement is too vague, doctor,” Spock stated as Kirk grinned into his coffee. “In order to arrive at a possible solution, you will have to be more precise.”
McCoy sighed and drew a hand across his face. “Fine,” he snapped. “Look. Jocelyn’s decided she needs a holiday – alone. So she’s shipping Joanna off to some summer camp on Arilion IV for two weeks while she’s doing a cruise of the Relubian Moons. Anyway, the thing is, Jocelyn wants me to take Joanna to the glider that will take the kids to Arilion. It departs from Starbase 10 eight hours after Jocelyn’s cruise ship, so she wants me to go all the way to the base just to spend a couple of hours with Jo. It’s not that I don’t want to see my daughter but if I take leave and go all the way to the Starbase, I’d like to spend more time with her. It’s just bad planning. You know how long it’s gonna take me to get there?”
“That depends on when exactly you will need to be at the Starbase and on where we will be when you have to depart,” Spock explained, taking a sip of his tea.
McCoy rolled his eyes. “I have to be there in 15 solar days.”
“The Enterprise will be in the Monara Sector at that time, which means you will require 4.572 solar days to travel to Starbase 10,” Spock responded.
McCoy goggled at the Vulcan. “How can you possibly know that, Spock? Do you have the routes of all ships and freighters in Federation space memorized?”
Kirk grinned at McCoy’s exasperation. “I’m sure Spock does have them memorized, Bones,” he winked at the Vulcan. “But I guess the reason why Spock knows is he’s going to Starbase 10 himself in… 10 days’ time, is it, Spock?”
Spock inclined his head. “Indeed, Jim. However, I have managed to secure transportation which will only require a travel time of 2.641 solar days.”
“What are you doing at Starbase 10?” McCoy asked. “Don’t tell me you’re going on that Moon cruise as well.”
Spock raised an eyebrow. “Negative, doctor. I am attending a conference on quantum mechanics which will be held at the base. And I believe this may be the solution to your problem.”
“Oh, hell no,” McCoy raised his hands. “If you’re suggesting that I come with you to attend that boring conference just so that I’m downright miserable when I see my daughter, the answer is no, Spock.”
“I am well aware of your adversity to acquiring new knowledge outside your own field,” Spock teased. “The solution I propose, however, is that I may watch your daughter since I will already be at the base – with your and your ex-wife’s approval of course.”
McCoy gaped at Spock. “You… would watch… you’d watch Jo for me…?”
“Certainly, doctor. However, if you do not feel comfortable…”
“No, no, Spock, that’s not it! I guess there’s few people who I’d trust to look after her, but you’re definitely one of them.” McCoy blushed. “But you realize she’s a seven-year-old human child, right? I didn’t think that kind of thing… watching a kid, I mean, I didn’t think it would be something you’d like to do…”
Spock gave the doctor the hint of a smile. “You may wish to discuss this with your ex-wife and with Joanna herself, doctor, however, my offer stands. Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe the captain and I are needed on the bridge.”
Kirk and Spock got up and as they turned to go Kirk grinned at McCoy. “Sounds like a problem solved to me, Bones.”
McCoy nodded slowly. “A Vulcan babysitter,” the doctor muttered. “I’ll be damned.”