etheris13



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    "Fine," Wen Qing says, turning back to Wei Ying. "You're pregnant."

    Lan Zhan feels his mouth drop open and has to work to shut it.

    Wei Ying reacts not at all. He's swinging his feet where he's sitting on the table, a bored expression on his face.

    Wen Qing just looks at him. "I am not joking about that."

    Wei Ying stops swinging his feet. He blinks several times in a row. "Wait," he says.

    Or:

    I woke up at 3AM and sent myself an email that just said:

     

    Modern cultivation friends curse sexy pollen hook up desperate WWX gets pregnant

     

    And then I wrote it. In three weeks. IDK.

    Please note: I am more than certain there is a western bent to this fic, unfortunately, particularly around the cultivation angle, and I wish I could have done better with that aspect of it.

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    24 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    The reception hall windchimes tinkle an arrival; in hindsight, Wei Wuxian thinks they’re laughing at him.

    He straightens up from behind the front desk, where he’s stocking buckets of live fire-ants for the discerning phoenix owner, and chirps, “Wei Wuxian’s Magical Menagerie – how can I help you today?”

     
    Wei Wuxian runs a vet clinic for all sorts of exotic specimens. Lan Wangji is not an exotic specimen, but rather a single dad doing his best for his kid and his magical bunny.

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    24 May 2026

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    “Do you know how scenes normally work? Do you –” there’s a sharp intake of breath, as though something has occurred to Lan Zhan too late. Wei Ying looks up and sees Lan Zhan absolutely stricken. “Do you know what BDSM is?”

    It seems like a moment where a response is required.

    Wei Ying squares his shoulders a touch and ventures, “Uh, chains and whips? That excite people?”

     

    Wei Ying craves rough sex and simply blames any (obviously unrelated) unpleasant feelings the next morning on a hangover. Lan Zhan is two things: appalled, and willing to teach him about the art of aftercare.

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    24 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Lan Pharmaceuticals, a century-old legacy pharma empire that ventured into luxury skincare some 20 years ago finally launches its first ever accessible line and watches it spectacularly TANK.

    Enter market specialist Wei Wuxian, who is just what they need, who can rescue a brand even from the depths of hell; and who, quite inconveniently, also happens to be their head of IT and younger heir's ex from college.

    OR: an epistolary account of the near-impossible salvation of Lan Pharmaceuticals' first ever mass-market skincare brand, told entirely through internal communications

    PODFIC

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    23 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “Ah, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan,” Wei Wuxian murmured as he gave Lan Wangji a saucy wink. “We can be close now!” He perceived the flash of annoyance in Lan Wangji’s eyes and wagged his finger as he cried, “Ah! Do you want to call me ridiculous again?”

    “Shameless,” Lan Wangji corrected.

    “That’s me!” Wei Wuxian laughed. “Ah, Lan Zhan, I like you! Let’s be friends! And as a sign of friendship, I’ll tell you a little secret.” He leaned forward, and as he did, his sweet, amused smile curled into something nasty, and his eyes glowed a red so bright, the clearing looked bathed in blood. “I’m as much of a devil as I need to be to cleanse this world of the unrighteous.” He winked again. “Tell your friends about me.”

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    19 May 2026

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