Chapter Text
Blinking up blearily on the familiar ceiling, Roksu immediately sat up.
Cale!—
"Ugh—!" His head throbbed in an instant pain. Then with a groan escaping his small lips, he could only curl himself on the leafy bed he was on.
"Hello, little fairy."
"Hello, little Fairies."
The voice was smooth and gentle as Roksu slowly looked up to see a floating being. Bigger than him undoubtedly. "Oh my, you seem to be in pain. That's unusual." He reached out to poke Roksu's forehead. The latter breathing out when he felt the dispersing pain. "There, would you like a tour in your new home?"
New... home?
"You're a fairy and we're gonna find out what lovely essence you have." The man chuckled at his lost expression. "Don't worry, you'll understand eventually."
Roksu nodded and reached for something beside him.
It's empty.
Roksu blankly stared at his hand. Something twisted inside him. What is it? Why does his inside feel so heavy? He wants to lie down.
"Hm? What is it?"
"Nothing..." He rubbed his palm in silence as the adult fairy looked at him in contemplation, probably trying to read his mind.
"Well, feel free to ask me if you feel troubled about something." He smiled.
Roksu fidgeted for a little while before finally opening his mouth, reluctantly. "Well, uhh, my name is Roksu right?"
"What?"
"Huh?"
The adult fairy blinked at him. Roksu blinked back.
What's with the reaction?
"Well, yes of course, that's your name, Roksu." The adult fairy smiled reassuringly and only then did Roksu sighed in relief.
After that small word exchange, the adult fairy decided to introduce himself as the Fairy of Life. His name? He said he didn't want a name so he never used one. It was strange for Roksu, but he leave it be.
Then what followed after is the tour. Everything and everyone Roksu sees is familiar. The ceiling, the walls, the rooms, the doors, and the outside, it all looked familiar. The fairies who introduced themselves with their affinity also looked familiar.
Why? What fairy am I? My memory feels foggy.
"Roksu, are you alright?" The Fairy of Life touched his forehead again. For some unknown phenomenon, he was taking away Roksu's pain. He was healing that pain away.
"Thanks."
"No problem." He smiled. Again. It looked familiar and the knot inside Roksu tightened even more.
"Uncle Life has a beautiful smile, doesn't he?"
"Roksu? Roksu... Oh my, this is unusual. Come on, let's get you going now. We'll continue the tour later." Roksu was now cradled on the man's arms. He fell and the man took it upon himself to carry the pained small fairy. "Let's take you to Fate."
Fate?
Roksu felt his consciousness going back and forth. Ever since he woke up, everything looks off. Every object he laid his eyes on, it felt like it's missing something.
Memory is everywhere.
You are everywhere.
Cale can disappear in a blink of an eye.
Everything was blurry, but Roksu can hear someone speaking and he was already laid down on his previous place when he woke up.
"He's processing."
"What?" It was Life. The voice was a little distance away.
"He's processing his essence. Something had broken it's rule." The new voice added for clarification.
Essence? Rule?
"But he's not supposed to enter his final phase yet! And why would his rule break?! He just woke up from his bud!" Roksu almost shot up from the screech by Life.
"He's not entering it. Life, calm down."
"I'm calm!"
"Then stop screeching and it's not him who broke his rule!"
"What?"
There was a brief silence that came after. Roksu thinks it's better to sleep. But before his mind can succumb to it, the voice who was talking with Life spoke.
"Memory, that's his affinity..."
"What? But that's—"
"Yes, I know. There's supposed to be a twin, but he's alone."
Twin... I have a—
Roksu heard a thud. Something fell.
"That can't be—Fate... what's going on..." Life's voice was so soft and low, Roksu almost didn't hear it.
"We're... just keep doing your job Life, there's nothing we can do about this."
It seems that Fate had left in silence.
...
"How... someone is supposed to be alive with you." Roksu almost flinched when he felt someone stroking his cheek.
Someone?
"Did... I fail...?" He heard the murmur of Life before he felt the skin leaving his cheek. "I'm sorry."
That was the last thing Roksu heard before he finally deemed himself alone for the lack of any further sound.
He opened his eyes to be greeted by a familiar ceiling.
"Twin."
"Yes, Roksu?"
"Ugh..." A groan left his lips along with a gasp.
Just why...
The night eventually came and Roksu can hear some noises outside.
"Obby! Come on! Let's go outside!" It was just below his window.
What's going on?
Roksu didn't want to leave the comfort of his leafy bed, so with a grunt, he turned away from the window and closed his eyes.
Sleep the pain away...
"Roksu, look, it's the night fairies!" A voice awed at the flickering fairies outside, playing under the dark sky.
"There are a lot of them."
"They're siblings! Like us!"
"We're twins. They're not."
"Hehe," Roksu felt someone pressing behind him and hugging him from behind. "Yep! We're twins and will always be toge—"
Gasp!
The gasp filled the previously silent area as Roksu sat up abruptly. His hand grabbing something beside him, but... it was still empty.
What... is...
There it goes again. The sinking sensation in his chest. It feels unpleasant. Roksu doesn't like it. He hates it.
It's been a long while since his headaches subsided and Life had told him what his affinity was. Yet, Life couldn't look at him properly. He keeps diverting his attention while speaking with Roksu. And Roksu didn't hear the word twin.
Not even once.
Why? Are they hiding it from him? Shouldn't Roksu have a right to know?
"Hello!" A sudden bubbly voice punctured his line of thoughts.
Roksu looked up to see a floating fairy. "Hi?"
"You're the new fairy!" The fairy who looked about the same height as him squealed as if he found something adorable. "I'm Hans! The Lemon Fairy! I'm older than you! Therefore I'm your senior!"
Roksu scrunched his nose. "So what?"
"So what? Well, you'll respect me and attend to my commands!"
He doesn't like the sound of that.
"Anyway! Why are you alone?"
"Roksu is my twin! We're together!"
"None of your business." Roksu rubbed his eyes when he saw something red flash for a second beside him.
Roksu turned away when Hans tilted his head, about to ask why again for sure.
"Go away."
"Hmmmm... Alright! Have fun!" Hans immediately flew away with a giggle.
That was easy.
Time flew by without notice. And Roksu memorized all the snoops and corners in the palace. Life was always with him for the majority of the time. Teaching him things that he needed to know. Eventually, he met Fate. The fairy who was probably older than Life.
"..."
"..."
"So, another fairy is about to wake up and I'm leaving this kid to you."
"So, another fairy is about to wake up and I'm leaving these kids to you."
Roksu blinked.
This again... It had almost became normal to hear second voices in his head that Roksu didn't feel the need to address it. But it still didn't shake off that ugly twisting in his heart.
"Why didn't you leave it to Nature?"
"Well, he's busy..."
"Busy my—" A hand clasped his mouth. Roksu blinked at Fate's frown.
"No no, no swearing in front of him."
"In front of us."
"Huh?" Two voice interlaced together and Roksu could only blink.
"Ah, nothing." He waved his hand awkwardly. The two adult only looked at each other as if they were conversing with their eyes.
And just like that, Roksu spent majority of his time in silence because Fate was more silent than he thought. He would only speak when Roksu has a question or looks like he's contemplating something. But mostly, Roksu already—strangely—has an answer to most of the things he sees or hears. It was easy. What wasn't easy is the dreams at night. Nightmare would've been a term, except, the dreams weren't scary. The only unpleasant thing is the aftermath. Every time Roksu wakes up, he'll always be sweating buckets and his heart would feel... numb and empty.
Then one day, his traitorous mouth betrayed him.
"What happened to my twin?" It was so low and soft that Fate almost missed it. But Roksu's eyes widened at his own question. He was lost in his mind, wondering what it would feel like to have someone constantly attached to him, and would hug him every time he feels something unpleasant.
"He's unknown." Fate calmly replied. Roksu didn't expect that. Well, he was the fairy of Fate so he knew something was up.
"What's his affinity?" Roksu suddenly couldn't stop his curiosity, his mouth wouldn't shut up. Even though it felt like he should stop. "Does he also have a name? Do we look the same?"
"Slow down, little flower."
"Little... flower."
Fats ignored his murmur and put away the book he was reading.
"I'm not sure about your twin. Memory and Time were supposed to be together. Wake up together. But you—" He paused. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw the tears streaming down Roksu's face.
Memory and Time were supposed to be together.
"Huh."
"You—"
"Why am I— what are these?" Roksu touched his cheeks. He can feel water dripping down from his eyes. Strangely, it didn't stop and the swirling emotions inside him intensified.
"You're crying." Fate softly said. His eyes conflicted.
"I'm crying..." Roksu tried to wipe it away, it feels strange. But he couldn't stop it. "It's annoying." He blurted out as a matter of fact. "It feels weird—" He didn't finish his sentence when he felt someone pulling him in an embrace.
"Haa... let it be. Let those waters be, they need to go."
"Why?"
Fate was silent for a moment, his eyes looking up the ceiling. "You lost someone, somewhere."
"I lost someone..."
"Yes."
"I once dreamed of being held like this."
"Is that so..."
"But he is smaller, we're the same height."
"Uhuh."
"And then he would say something like, 'Going outside, exploring the world.'" Roksu felt the slight stiffening of the man. "Then I'd say, 'yes' but in truth, I just want to stay with him and if he wants to go outside then I want to go with him..."
"He sounds free."
"Yeah, so maybe if I go outside—"
"I'm sorry."
"Roksu? What's wrong?" Roksu suddenly went silent. Fate felt something amiss. The air was fluctuating around them. Roksu's grip tightened on him.
"I'll bring back your peace."
"I'll make them pay." Fate heard his words. His eyes widened when he saw Roksu's eyes shining.
"Roksu, Hey. Are you there?"
"Uncle..." Shiver ran down Fate's spine. His hair on his neck stood in guard. Roksu never calls him uncle. "I need him back. I want him back."
"Roksu, that's not—Roksu!" The small fairy limped on his arms. As if strings had detached itself from his limbs.
"Damn it."